LTR and her lack of trust

Zontyy

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So I am currently in a relationship with a woman I have a child with and she seems to be having trust issues. Back in the day we just used to **** and have fun, she never asked to be exclusive, then she went through my phone and saw all these other women I was talking to who also were sending me nudes and what not and she lost it and felt like she was being cheated on. I explained to her that we were not official and she had no right to go through my phone or even question my other relationships. A few days later she countered with I want to date you and be exclusive to you but if you want to run around with other women then you can do that just come home to me. I thought about that while it seemed like a good offer, I just didn't want to deal with the drama I know this offer would create instead I just said lets try this relationship out.

One time when she was drunk and acting irresponsible I recorded her on my phone having a meltdown and losing her mind. I wanted to hold on to this recording incase she ever tried to deny me rights to my son I always wanted access to him no matter what. Anyways she found out and got pissed and felt like I was black mailing her and asked me to delete them which I said I would but never got around to it because I've just been busy with life and trying to spend an hour looking through to find a single video in my google photos seemed like a waste of my time. Then when she found the video later on she lost her **** and felt like her trust was violated made it into this huge thing.

Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.

She ended up cleaning up the whole house while I was at work and then it turned into an apology with 15 hour sex session which only stopped briefly to take care of the kids.

I just don't understand what the hell is going on with her and she seems to becoming unglued. Any thoughts?
 

_sideways_

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15 hour sex session is all I heard. Lol jk

She needs therapy. I don't have kids but, I would think their safety comes first and to act out and leave broken glass that they can put in their mouth. Idk...anger management maybe.
The other stuff sounds like typical crazy. Which you rewarded with orgasm after orgasm.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Sorry to hear it, but not really sure what you are looking for in terms of thoughts about this. It's pretty clear what you need to do. I just got out of a relationship with a girl who had uncontrollable fear and insecurity issues around infidelity, while at the same time claims she had never been cheated on in her life. I can tell you that the behavior will never go away. Nothing you do will satisfy her that you are committed to her, and EVEN if the specific incidents you just mentioned had never happened, she would find or manufacture reasons to be suspicious and fearful. It's not about you, it's about her insecurity, and you can't fix that. Also the pattern of melt-downs followed by epic sex was exactly what I experienced from the girl I dated too. It isn't healthy and points to underlying psychological disorders.

Her reaching out to your ex crossed a line, and her threatening to kill your ex and her kid crossed an even bigger line, combined with her tendency toward physical violence (both of property and of you). You need to eject immediately before she does something to you (potentially while you are sleeping and can't defend yourself) or the child. You also don't want to be setup for false domestic abuse charges.
 

RickTheToad

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So I am currently in a relationship with a woman I have a child with and she seems to be having trust issues. Back in the day we just used to **** and have fun, she never asked to be exclusive, then she went through my phone and saw all these other women I was talking to who also were sending me nudes and what not and she lost it and felt like she was being cheated on. I explained to her that we were not official and she had no right to go through my phone or even question my other relationships. A few days later she countered with I want to date you and be exclusive to you but if you want to run around with other women then you can do that just come home to me. I thought about that while it seemed like a good offer, I just didn't want to deal with the drama I know this offer would create instead I just said lets try this relationship out.

One time when she was drunk and acting irresponsible I recorded her on my phone having a meltdown and losing her mind. I wanted to hold on to this recording incase she ever tried to deny me rights to my son I always wanted access to him no matter what. Anyways she found out and got pissed and felt like I was black mailing her and asked me to delete them which I said I would but never got around to it because I've just been busy with life and trying to spend an hour looking through to find a single video in my google photos seemed like a waste of my time. Then when she found the video later on she lost her **** and felt like her trust was violated made it into this huge thing.

Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.

She ended up cleaning up the whole house while I was at work and then it turned into an apology with 15 hour sex session which only stopped briefly to take care of the kids.

I just don't understand what the hell is going on with her and she seems to becoming unglued. Any thoughts?
Sounds like trouble. DTB immediately.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

dude99

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So I am currently in a relationship with a woman I have a child with and she seems to be having trust issues. Back in the day we just used to **** and have fun, she never asked to be exclusive, then she went through my phone and saw all these other women I was talking to who also were sending me nudes and what not and she lost it and felt like she was being cheated on. I explained to her that we were not official and she had no right to go through my phone or even question my other relationships. A few days later she countered with I want to date you and be exclusive to you but if you want to run around with other women then you can do that just come home to me. I thought about that while it seemed like a good offer, I just didn't want to deal with the drama I know this offer would create instead I just said lets try this relationship out.

One time when she was drunk and acting irresponsible I recorded her on my phone having a meltdown and losing her mind. I wanted to hold on to this recording incase she ever tried to deny me rights to my son I always wanted access to him no matter what. Anyways she found out and got pissed and felt like I was black mailing her and asked me to delete them which I said I would but never got around to it because I've just been busy with life and trying to spend an hour looking through to find a single video in my google photos seemed like a waste of my time. Then when she found the video later on she lost her **** and felt like her trust was violated made it into this huge thing.

Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.

She ended up cleaning up the whole house while I was at work and then it turned into an apology with 15 hour sex session which only stopped briefly to take care of the kids.

I just don't understand what the hell is going on with her and she seems to becoming unglued. Any thoughts?
Too much drama. Tooooo much drama. This is why you don't have kids with stupid crazy chicks.

You have officially reached the end of good times stage with this chick and all she wants to do is fight and cause schitt for you and every other person in your life.

Girls who go through your phone threaten your ex, smash windows, trash their own house and try to physically fight you will also lie about you. False rape claims false abuse claims false allegations of you abusing your kid...... dude this is going to go all bad.

Dump her now. Walk away now. Deal with the legal stuff and your child appropriately.

They never improve. They get worse. If she is giving you this much bullschitt now i can't imagine how deplorable she will be months down the road.

Walk away.
 

Barrister

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So I am currently in a relationship with a woman I have a child with and she seems to be having trust issues. Back in the day we just used to **** and have fun, she never asked to be exclusive, then she went through my phone and saw all these other women I was talking to who also were sending me nudes and what not and she lost it and felt like she was being cheated on. I explained to her that we were not official and she had no right to go through my phone or even question my other relationships. A few days later she countered with I want to date you and be exclusive to you but if you want to run around with other women then you can do that just come home to me. I thought about that while it seemed like a good offer, I just didn't want to deal with the drama I know this offer would create instead I just said lets try this relationship out.

One time when she was drunk and acting irresponsible I recorded her on my phone having a meltdown and losing her mind. I wanted to hold on to this recording incase she ever tried to deny me rights to my son I always wanted access to him no matter what. Anyways she found out and got pissed and felt like I was black mailing her and asked me to delete them which I said I would but never got around to it because I've just been busy with life and trying to spend an hour looking through to find a single video in my google photos seemed like a waste of my time. Then when she found the video later on she lost her **** and felt like her trust was violated made it into this huge thing.

Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.

She ended up cleaning up the whole house while I was at work and then it turned into an apology with 15 hour sex session which only stopped briefly to take care of the kids.

I just don't understand what the hell is going on with her and she seems to becoming unglued. Any thoughts?
You need to exit ASAP. Not sure you have established your custody rights but if you have not you also need to contact an attorney ASAP.
 

Bokanovsky

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Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.
I'd like to know what your thought process was when you decided that it would be a good idea to have a kid with this lunatic...
 

Epimanes

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Forget passcode the phone..... use biometrics finger print
 

Zontyy

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Passcode your phone dude
It does have a passcode, when I asked her about it she showed me a video where I typed in my passcode in front of the baby cam. She took the baby cam footage to find out my passcode.

15 hour sex session is all I heard. Lol jk

She needs therapy. I don't have kids but, I would think their safety comes first and to act out and leave broken glass that they can put in their mouth. Idk...anger management maybe.
The other stuff sounds like typical crazy. Which you rewarded with orgasm after orgasm.
I suggested anger management and to curb her drinking until she figures out what is wrong with her. She even said if she didn't have kids she would have signed herself into a psych ward. I am going to make an appointment with her to speak to a counselor.

You need to exit ASAP. Not sure you have established your custody rights but if you have not you also need to contact an attorney ASAP.
False rape claims false abuse claims false allegations of you abusing your kid...... dude this is going to go all bad.
You need to eject immediately before she does something to you (potentially while you are sleeping and can't defend yourself) or the child. You also don't want to be setup for false domestic abuse charges.
I'm not really worried about this mainly because of all the baby cams in the house and the mountains of stuff I have if it ever came to that. I'm sure she would be the one to get arrested and she knows that, not to mention her troubled past with custody before I ever came along. That's not the point though because I feel a child needs his mother in a relationship.

I'd like to know what your thought process was when you decided that it would be a good idea to have a kid with this lunatic...
I wasn't thinking at the time, I was going through a breakup and she was there for me and we didn't have any condoms.
This is why you don't have kids with stupid crazy chicks.
Back when I knew her really well she worked hard, was extremely responsible and didn't show any signs of this. I think her insecurities or possible some hormonal issue is at work. I've known the girl for 3 years and never showed any of these symptoms.

It's not about you, it's about her insecurity, and you can't fix that. Also the pattern of melt-downs followed by epic sex was exactly what I experienced from the girl I dated too. It isn't healthy and points to underlying psychological disorders.
I tend to agree with this about it being insecurity, she flat out told me she feels insecure with me and that she isn't good enough for me. That even in her previous relationships she was never good enough and no matter what she does whether that is tattoo a name on her body or whatever that she is nothing. She then mentioned how I am the only man while treating her with respect also brought her down with suggestions. All the previous men seemed completely happy and content with her and happy just to be with her but left. I other hand am still here but I bring her down by making suggestions on how she change her appearance. I told her long and hard think about that, others decided she wasn't worth the effort and left and I'm not going to feel bad for communicating my wants. It's silly stuff too like I would rather she stop tanning and have pale skin instead of tan, I would rather she grow her bush out instead of shaving it clean. Apparently these suggestions make her feel like nothing. It always ends up leading to crazy sex for hours which I do enjoy.
 

_sideways_

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Sounds like your making excuses. In the end you always say, ...but the sex is great.
Yea...and that's how these things happen or get worse...guys know the crazy but stay longer cuz of the awesome sex.
Take away the awesome sex and you'd have at least one foot out the door.
 

bat soup

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So I am currently in a relationship with a woman I have a child with and she seems to be having trust issues. Back in the day we just used to **** and have fun, she never asked to be exclusive, then she went through my phone and saw all these other women I was talking to who also were sending me nudes and what not and she lost it and felt like she was being cheated on. I explained to her that we were not official and she had no right to go through my phone or even question my other relationships. A few days later she countered with I want to date you and be exclusive to you but if you want to run around with other women then you can do that just come home to me. I thought about that while it seemed like a good offer, I just didn't want to deal with the drama I know this offer would create instead I just said lets try this relationship out.

One time when she was drunk and acting irresponsible I recorded her on my phone having a meltdown and losing her mind. I wanted to hold on to this recording incase she ever tried to deny me rights to my son I always wanted access to him no matter what. Anyways she found out and got pissed and felt like I was black mailing her and asked me to delete them which I said I would but never got around to it because I've just been busy with life and trying to spend an hour looking through to find a single video in my google photos seemed like a waste of my time. Then when she found the video later on she lost her **** and felt like her trust was violated made it into this huge thing.

Anyways we got past that and things been pretty good, I recently had an ex contact me saying she was going to be moving back into my area and wanted to see me and visit with me etc. I told this Ex of mine to kick rocks to enjoy her life but I'm currently in a relationship and to not contact me. About a week later I told my current GF about the call and things seemed good. One night while showering she swiped my phone and decided to go through my search history along with facebook history etc. She saw that I had once looked up my Ex's facebook way back when she called. Anyways I'm outside relaxing and I get a call from my Ex who I just told to stay out my life. Apparently my current GF called my Ex and threaten to not only kill her and to kill her child if she contacted me. Then when my GF comes out and jokingly says who are talking to one of your friends or maybe your EX since you want to be with her so badly.

Being that I was on the phone with my EX and said yes actually I am on the phone with my EX she just called me and told me you were threatening her. Next thing I know my current GF losing her mind about me siding with my EX and goes inside punches out the glass windows to the door and ends up cutting up her hand bleeding all over the place. She proceeds to trash the whole apartment, dishes, pictures a little bit of everything and I just walked inside and just sat down on the couch and watched. Next thing I know she in a cold shower with the bathtub filling out sobbing/wailing and then gets out and tries to fight me I restrain her take her back and hold down her arms MMA style. After a few minutes of her trying to break free and realizing she was completely powerless she ended up going up to the room to cry the night away. I made some dinner and cleaned up the broken glass as I have a child running around the house with her and then went to bed.

She ended up cleaning up the whole house while I was at work and then it turned into an apology with 15 hour sex session which only stopped briefly to take care of the kids.

I just don't understand what the hell is going on with her and she seems to becoming unglued. Any thoughts?
I would get the hell out of there before she cuts your balls off.
 

bat soup

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- She took the baby cam footage to find out my passcode.
- I suggested anger management and to curb her drinking until she figures out what is wrong with her.
- She said if she didn't have kids she would have signed herself into a psych ward.
- we didn't have any condoms.
- I would rather she grow her bush out instead of shaving it clean.
I feel bad for you, but I think you'd be better off leaving that staying with a woman that does stuff like this. Who knows what else she could do.

I was once with a girl that broke something (some kind of glass ornament). That same day she was packing her bags.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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