Low-Status Male

[DJWB]

Hi,

I am probably the male with the lowest status on the planet socialy and when it comes to women.

I want to know if anybody can recommend any good books courses on becoming a dominant male socially i.e. I get so much grief (so ****ing much that you would not believe it) from everyone and can never stick up for myself as as it is too overwhelming. I want something to show me exactly how to make a transformation so that I get respect.

I can see how this site will help me but I also recognise that I have to be able to deal with people in a new way so that when I do meet a girl my former reputation will not be a problem. I just keep thinking that if I learn this stuff and start talking to girls, I will have somebody coming over and making jokes and remarks about me, evryone will laugh along with them as it is the case right now and the girl will just go "see ya" as no body wants to go out with someone that everyone makes fun of.

I am sue that some of you understand where I am coming from and would like you to tell me what other sources will help transform me from being a social freak to a high status male that the girls want and the guys would not **** with.

Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am desperate.

 

[Nex]

Firstly, read the DJ bible.

Secondly, meet new people with your NEW attitude.

If you can be your own individual, have your own opinions on things, and not take **** from anyone, you will gain respect.

The other day a friend slapped my balls to make other people laugh. I threw a chair at his head. A guy hid my clothing as I ran around the street naked (long story), I threated to break a bottle over his head. These two guys now bow down to me.

It's really that simple! If you can act EXCITED, KIND, BRAVE (if you're in a group with a bunch a guys you're just getting to know, approaching a hot chick is one of the best way to make a super impression).

Be good at something, be unique, and don't let anyone boss you around EVER. Let them know this whenever they try.

What really lasts is the first impression. Now with the people you currently know you can't change that impression, so get to know new people with a dominant mindset (you do what you want on your terms, period).

Hope this helps some.

 

[California Love]

You probably havent gotten your ass kicked enough yet. Try building up a mountain of anger...work on letting yourself go, fighting, screaming, whatever....as long as it isn't pitying yourself. Once you get this down, u can put your focus onto confidence.

 

[Ebach]

DJWB, it takes work. Best way to build confidence is to interract with new people on daily basis. After a while, those that made fun of you will be jealous of you or be cool with you next time you meet them. It's always one or the other. They're always shocked of the transformation you've done and they usually hate you or love you for it. You don't want to hang with the haters you want the peeps that are cool.

It takes a long time to change. I saw a buddy of mine I haven't seen in a few months and when he saw me he's like damn man you've changed a lot. I've changed in attitude, I've been working out, etc. Confidence is a great thing to have and the only way to build it is through experience. Talk to new people about whatever. Get angry when you feel like it and swear at people when you're not happy. After a while you'll learn new ways to handle yourself, your feelings (anger, etc) and you'll actually become much happier.

Anytime you feel the fear, just say **** IT, IM DOING THIS! Try to change your way of thinking from negative to positive. When I read about the "seeing the glass as half full instead of half empty" I was like yeah right whatever that won't change **** you're stupid blah blah blah. After a while, once I knew how negative my thinking was, it was the most important thing I've learned. It changed my thinkinging tremendously. You gotta think about the positive in whatever you're doing.

 

[rgeere]

There is an old proverb that goes something to the effect of "agression is the road to tolerance" or something along that line, but that is not necessarily other peoples tolerance towards you, it is tolerance towards yourself and others as well.

In a way I agree to a point with people telling you to take the extreeme opposite polarity to go from a passive mindset to an agressive mindset, but remember that the goal is to learn to be well balanced and flexible, then you will learn what it truly means to be assertive, and you will be able to make decisions in your life that will have a positive effect on yourself and also others.

Don't take everything that the others have written above in post telling you that you should be agressive with others consistently.
Trust me, taking an agressive mindset will get your butt kicked quicker than what they would have you to believe, and it does not matter how big you are and how many friends you have there will always be bigger and better, learn a balance or the balance will be engrained into you after living a life of pain and misery. I'm telling this for your benefit otherwise you will suffer the same consequences from those who have admitted themselves into the school of hard knocks; don't enroll there it is a sucky school.

Basically the end result of going from passive, agressive, then having the crap kicked out of you will alow you to come to the true realization of self-control and a healthy well rounded lifestyle that will truly cause some very positive things to happen in your life, and not just with women your whole life will prosper.

 

[Ebach]

You're passive now. In order for you to become assertive you first have to become aggressive. I don't know a single individual who became assertive before being aggressive first because it takes experience to know what assertiveness is all about. That's the reason a lot of people don't get much help from the self-help books on assertiveness, because they don't have the required experience to make what they read on the book work for them. Life is all about experience. Without it you can't change. Simple as that. You've been in the passive stance for a long time. You have to try living on the aggressive stance for a little while and things will start making sense. You'll understand that agreessiveness is not always good, that you don't have to be an ******* to be a DJ, that control and assertiveness are the way to go. BUT! Before experiencing all that you don't really know how to control or assert yourself even if you read a bunch of books. NO! After some experience, reading those books on assertiveness and self control will help you tremendously because you will be able to recall real life experiences where that happened to you and you will know in what ways to change yourself in order be assertive but not aggressive. It's possible. You can be assert yourself without being aggressive. You can control yourself without controling others. It's one of the things you learn with experience.

 

[Dan_DJ]

Become more masculine. If you don't lift weights, start now. The increased level of testosterone in your body will work wonders - you'll feel more confident, agressive, funnier/wittier and more MANLY. That's the key to being the high-status/alpha male - masculinity.

 

[JB101]

Create a new and empowering environment for yourself. You have alot of power that you can tap into. You can find a new crowd, new friends. Who do you want to hang around with?

You have the power to exercise, to play sports, to bulk up. The power to change your style. The power to change your posture and body language in an instant.

Honestly, it's too much to expect to go from one end of the spectrum to the other overnight. It takes experience. It starts by shaping yourself and your environment. Raise your standards for what you expect.

 

[JSH]

Originally posted by DJWB
Hi,

I am probably the male with the lowest status on the planet socialy and when it comes to women.

I want to know if anybody can recommend any good books courses on becoming a dominant male socially i.e. I get so much grief (so ****ing much that you would not believe it) from everyone and can never stick up for myself as as it is too overwhelming. I want something to show me exactly how to make a transformation so that I get respect.

I can see how this site will help me but I also recognise that I have to be able to deal with people in a new way so that when I do meet a girl my former reputation will not be a problem. I just keep thinking that if I learn this stuff and start talking to girls, I will have somebody coming over and making jokes and remarks about me, evryone will laugh along with them as it is the case right now and the girl will just go "see ya" as no body wants to go out with someone that everyone makes fun of.

I am sue that some of you understand where I am coming from and would like you to tell me what other sources will help transform me from being a social freak to a high status male that the girls want and the guys would not **** with.

Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am desperate.

Alright scrap the first paragraph, do not think that way. For a start there is always somebody worse off, secondly, who thinks you have the lowest status, you and other people, therefore you will. However, if only other people believe you have low status and you carry yourself as if you have status, then who will a stranger believe, these obviously crazy people or your attitude. I think i kinda explained it. Read Pook's Be A Man which is often cited by people as being their favourite post. It is good, but not my fav.

Read the entire section of the posts in the bible, at the bottom of this page , on get the right attitude. Although reading the whole mass of information there and here is good too. I do not know about seminars and courses and for me they mainly seem to be a waste of time and money, but im sure someone here has used one to their advantage. You want to make the transformation to get respect. Well first you need to respect yourself and secondly you need to stop being so worried about everyone else's view of you and whetehr you actually have their respect ( i know it sounds weird but . . . ). DO NOT BE OVERWHELMED by others, hell im glad i changed mysef before i get out there in the real world if it is that bad, i thought it was just an enclosed community like school where it kinda mattered what the general view of you is.

The reason the girl will say see you, is because you will nto stand up for yourself, you will let it get to you and therefore will not be her protector. Trust me your former reputation will not matter, as Shakespeare said "What is past is prologue", live your life in the present and plan for the future but do not worry about the past. People will always be able to embaress you but if they have respect for you they will not. You need to improve yourself first and you start that by not caring about the attitude of others, in fact use it as a spur, be detirmined to prove them wrong.

I think your last paragraph again is giving in to them, but also to your ideals of the perfect man. You should be someone that you are happy with, but not someone that you feel you should be for the sake of others.

and finally I disagree with DJ Dan, you do not have to start weight lifting to become more manly, everyone is obssesed with weightlifting. The trouble with it is that it tends to become obsessive, instead rather do other sports, especially team sports and eventually you will find a niche. If part of a team, you will have confidence as others will have to rely on you.

 

[Charisma]

It's pretty hard to make your present entourage accept your new self. It's easier to make new friends while being who you have become recentlly, you'll generally don't have to put up with **** like 'What's up with you recently anyway ?'

I changed hard when I went to college, so they were all new friends basically, and it worked like a charm for me. But my friends from highschool took about a year or so to fully get the new me But it's normal to grow and find out who you really are, so they'll just have to accept that or f*ck off

Oh and btw, don't expect this site to do anything for you except maybe make you aware that you're not the only one who's life ain't perfect, and that you could use some improvement.

 

[NatureGuy]

Work on changing your 'status'. Go to college or get specialized training of your choice that will propel you into a successfull career/direction and everything else will fall into place.
And finally, never sit back and think
'I'm done' - always strive to improve yourself and your circumstances.

 

[GQ Prettyboy]

First of all you need you need to change the way you think about yourself. If you think of yourself as low-status, people will treat you like a low-status male. And when you go out, there will be alot of people who won`t know you, and therefore they will always judge you based on first impressions. So, make first impressions good positive ones.