Losing respect through being needy!

[Aesthetix29]

Hi, I've acted very needy towards a girl I was dating and now she's gone distant, probaly ran a mile to be honest. My question is... With me acting needy she's lost respect for me.. Right! How can I get her to do a 180 and maybe see me as she once did ? I've been in no contact since Monday to no avail. That's if it's even possible ? Thanks

 

[Dreesy]

Continue with NC and don't look back. You won't need her when you find your next woman.

 

[Aesthetix29]

Ok thanks for advice dreesey, Thats all i can do i suppose... Its weird how liking someone too much makes them run for the hills... fell into beta mode didnt i haha! Hopefully giving her some space will help in repairing this mess that ive caused, as she's a cool chick!

 

[Skyline]

Hi, I've acted very needy towards a girl I was dating and now she's gone distant, [probably] ran a mile to be honest. My question is... With me acting needy she's lost respect for me.. Right! How can I get her to do a 180 and maybe see me as she once did ? I've been in no contact since Monday to no avail. That's if it's even possible ? Thanks

It depends how needy you have been acting toward her. Since you said "she probably ran a mile" that probably means you were guy the guy texting/talking to her everyday and every second of those days. Oh yeah, you're not going no contact. It's only no contact if she contacts you and you ignore it because you have already moved on to bigger and better things. You're going ghost, waiting for her to contact you. Since you're asking when she'll contact you and it's only been like 4 days... You have a bit of a road ahead of you. I would give her at least 3 weeks if not more.

During that time, you should improve yourself and meet other women. It's your fault you were acting weak and needy so try and capitalize on this opportunity for improvement. She may have already met another guy so don't count on this.

 

[Aesthetix29]

Yes I was the guy talking to her everyday but only because she initiated contact first... Yes I've gone ghost as I think its best to give her space.. And your right its possible she's met somebody else already as she's a pretty girl, if she has that's fine good luck to her. As for improving myself I've done an amazing job in the last 12 months massive transformation on looks and banter.. But need some major work on my texting/flirting game... I don't struggle getting girls as I'm not ugly haha! But if I have a chance to make things right with this girl then I want to take it. Surely because I was being needy there was no challenge for her... But she was very attracted to me via looks etc... So she must still find me attractive... Yes ? I need to improve my GAME! As you stated 4 days isn't very long..it was Sunday night the last time she texted me... I'm out with a new girl tomorrow and I've had a few girls comment on my Facebook status which she can see so I'm hoping to trigger some sort of jealousy!! Thanks

 

[Skyline]

Yes I was the guy talking to her everyday but only because she initiated contact first... Yes I've gone ghost as I think its best to give her space.. And your right its possible she's met somebody else already as she's a pretty girl, if she has that's fine good luck to her. As for improving myself I've done an amazing job in the last 12 months massive transformation on looks and banter.. But need some major work on my texting/flirting game... I don't struggle getting girls as I'm not ugly haha! But if I have a chance to make things right with this girl then I want to take it. Surely because I was being needy there was no challenge for her... But she was very attracted to me via looks etc... So she must still find me attractive... Yes ? I need to improve my GAME! As you stated 4 days isn't very long..it was Sunday night the last time she texted me... I'm out with a new girl tomorrow and I've had a few girls comment on my Facebook status which she can see so I'm hoping to trigger some sort of jealousy!! Thanks

Oh I see. Whenever a girl initiates contact with you FIRST, it's a subtle hint that she wants you to ask her out. Even though it seems like it, she does not want make all this random small talk- which is what you were doing. So if a girl texts/calls/messages you randomly it's her way of pursuing you in a subtle manner; ask her when she's free to get together and set up a date. The opportunity to have sex and escalate doesn't generally happen over text/phone, if she seems "into" it it still just fluff talk because you're not facing her in person. Judge by actions, not words!

Regarding the getting good at text game, I would say don't bother. Personally, I think I'm very good at text game but I really think it's sort of pointless. Mainly for the reason stated above and because the phone/messaging is meant for setting up dates. Save that conversation stuff for the in person ordeals. Most relationships or possible relationships are ruined because of too much pointless attention over messaging/the phone. However the only hole to this would be online dating, which is an area I'm still on the barrier of agreeing or disagreeing with.

And the "Jealously" thing... Just don't focus on trying to make her jealous because you still want her.

 

[sylvester the cat]

the day you discover you don't need a woman in your life is the day you'll be fighting off women with a sh1tty stick.

it's a paradox alright.

 

[Aesthetix29]

^^^ well that's so true! As for jealousy I'm not trying too hard to accomplish it... Just want her to know that I ain't waiting about, and frayzer we've already slept together a few times.... The mind boggles!

On another note there was a girl I was texting a few weeks ago who said she'd go out on a date with me... But ended I ended up getting off with another girl so just left it... I just messaged her asking if she's free next week and she replied ' that she's busy next week as she's working in Sheffield...take it that's a subtle way of saying NO! Haha

 

[Aesthetix29]

Well it's been practically a full week now without talking or texting her.. And neither of us have been in contact. Quite surprised to be honest I thought she'd of been in touch, I think this ones definitely a lost cause..! Actually thought I'd be able to sort it out with her.

 

[sylvester the cat]

Well it's been practically a full week now without talking or texting her.. And neither of us have been in contact. Quite surprised to be honest I thought she'd of been in touch, I think this ones definitely a lost cause..! Actually thought I'd be able to sort it out with her.

Why are you surprised? Nothing turns a girl off more than a 'man' who allows his inner beta to take control.

You're doing it now. Thinking about her. Get on with your life.

 

[Aesthetix29]

Ok I've just bumped into my cousin who went on a night out with this girl I was seeing last Saturday... So cut a long story short... I asked my cousin if she said anything about that night and my cousin replied saying this 'Yeah she said the same bout u! U not msg her so she thought u wasn't interested x' so because I went no contact she thought I wasn't interested... So I still think I have. A chance as my cousin said I should message her... Any advice on what type of message to send would be a big help... Thinking funny and witty and I can also ask her if she's definitely going to this meal on Saturday etc...

 

[MOTU]

I would wait it out. If her interest level is high, she'll contact you.

If you can't wait, my favorite method is to send a funny picture (not of me) with no commentary.

 

[Aesthetix29]

Too late I sent this 'name, are you free to talk later ? X' to which she has replied.... 'Hi What for ? X' I have no idea what to put to that ? Don't know whether to just be honest with like I know you like me and I like you etc...

 

[goldengoose]

Hi, I've acted very needy towards a girl I was dating and now she's gone distant, probaly ran a mile to be honest. My question is... With me acting needy she's lost respect for me.. Right! How can I get her to do a 180 and maybe see me as she once did ? I've been in no contact since Monday to no avail. That's if it's even possible ? Thanks

Why waste your time trying to salvage a dead relationship that will never come back to life? It's always easier starting out new with someone else where you have no history and you don't have to fix the mistakes you made. Just learn from your previous mistakes and learn not to do them with the next girl.

It's always easier to game a girl with high attraction that it is with a girl who's lost respect for you.

 

[Trump]

Too late I sent this 'name, are you free to talk later ? X' to which she has replied.... 'Hi What for ? X' I have no idea what to put to that ? Don't know whether to just be honest with like I know you like me and I like you etc...

Ah bro I've lost so many girls back in the day by being needy. Awesome attraction at first, then no attraction later. But once you figure it out you can tell them off and they will still come back...lol. :yes:

Anyway "hi what for" means "I need you to give me a reason to be spend my time with you." Not good. Only way you get this girl to wake up is to get another girl to text her to stay away from you. It will be more powerful than any thing you say or do.

 

[Aesthetix29]

Cheers guys it's definitely a lost cause... She never replied to my reply yesterday! Time to move on! Still can't believe I f***** it up, it's crazy how girls can change there minds haha! When you mentioned that she needs a reason to spend time with me.. Obviously me liking her is not a good enough reason. I'm going to see her Saturday anyway!