Looks do matter anectode

[Pandora]

I do not want to start the whole looks matter flame war again. I understand that this is a never ending debate but please check out this story before we flame each other. I just want to give a recent anecdote. I recently went to a wedding for a close female friend of mine. When the brides maid gave the speech on how they first met i noticed something interesting. The brides maid said that when the bride first saw the groom she instantly knew that she was head over heels for him. He was just that good looking to her, that she knew she wanted him. Now they are married (this bride is a solid 8 btw).
This got me thinking. As much as we men want to believe that looks doesn't matter we can not hide from the fact that it does for many many many women. I will even go as far as to say it is the deciding factor in many cases. We are talking about the most superficial creatures in the world here. They like diamonds becuz they are shiny. They pick cars based on color of the exterior and how cute it is. They like kittens becuz they look cute. How can we then say that looks dont matter?

Saying looks dont matter alot is just an excuse that us lazy guys say. Its becuz we dont want to get in the gym and get down to 8% body fat and be well built. A great looking guy with an average personality is going to get way more girls than ugly chubby guy with a great personality. The ugly chubby guy will have to work his way out of the entertaining friend zone all the time. Actually hang around women and you will be surprised how superficial and visual they are when it comes to short term se*/ hookups with guys. My resolution from now on is to get back to my old physique. Working out and getting a great body is just as important as working on game. Looks is the most important factor for American girls. When a girl thinks you are really cute it is basically a done deal as long as you dont mess up extremely badly. Im talking diarrhea on the first date bad lol..

 

[Slickster]

Good idea getting back into shape, but do it for you, not because you want to impress some chicks.

Do you still have the same motivation to make that happen?

 

[Mike32ct]

Absolutely correct.

Guys are finally coming around and starting to realize how incredibly shallow women are in the looks department.

As noted above, a good way to notice this is be around groups of women. Easedrop a bit and you'll learn a lot about this "hot vs not hot" and how a guy's looks are literally put under a microscope.

While I think there is more to looks than physique such as face, height, hair, etc., physique is one thing guys can change, so it's worth it.

 

[zekko]

While I think there is more to looks than physique such as face, height, hair, etc., physique is one thing guys can change, so it's worth it.

It's always better to be fit and in shape than not to be, for a variety of reasons. But I agree with you that there is more to looks than physique. There's a train of thought here that if you go to the gym and work out, poof you'll be a good looking, hot guy.

One of the interesting things I've noticed from reading seduction forums is that this will work for some guys but not others. Sometimes, an unattractive guy who works out is just a fit, unattractive guy. Like Slickster says, it's better to do it for yourself. But there always seems to be this expectation here that getting ripped is going to get you a lot of female attention. This must be frustrating for the guys that this doesn't work with.

I was always fit growing up, very physically active. At one point I got into weightlifting. I basically exchanged one type of being fit for another, kind of a runner's body for a weightlifter's. I feel like the extra muscle I carry now is an advantage for me, part of what makes me attractive and masculine looking. But there was never any sort of sudden on/off immediate change in the amount of female attention I got. Things have just gotten kind of incrementally better for me slowly over time due to a variety of gradual changes.

I really envy guys who say they started lifting weights and then wow all of a sudden the girls are all over them. I'd love to be able to make one simple change like that and notice such a dramatic change in attraction, if only it were really that easy. For me, it's been a long, slow slog trying to build value.

 

[disgustipated]

That's because working out changes your looks. Not just your body, your face too. You have to decide if your new workout face is more attractive or no. I have a picture of myself @ 28 or 29 where I was running 50 miles per week, I looked 18 in the face. When I lift I get a more squared jowl or jawline, I notice it in other guys too. It's a by product of the type of exercise you do. So yeah, you can change your face some via exercise.

 

[Burroughs]

Only men who are retards, morons, and simpletons believe that looks are not 100% the reason for female attraction...an attraction kept alive through wealth or status.

That being said if your friends good looks are what brought him into a woman's marriage scope and bagged....well...now as a married man he is a slave..his good looks literally attracted the chains that bind him

 

[Pandora]

Only men who are retards, morons, and simpletons believe that looks are not 100% the reason for female attraction...an attraction kept alive through wealth or status.

That being said if your friends good looks are what brought him into a woman's marriage scope and bagged....well...now as a married man he is a slave..his good looks literally attracted the chains that bind him

Yeh i like that you say that the attraction initially sparked by looks is kept alive through wealth or status.

 

[Pandora]

Disgustipated yeh man i noticed that alot of body builders and some ufc fighters get this extra chiseled jaw line. It might be becuz of the low body fat. I never understood how the jaw line can seem to increase that much from just working out. I always attributed it to the increase in growth hormone. But if it was growth hormone they probably would have an overriding brow and a big tongue also (acromegaly like Andre the giant). It might be that you have little body fat so it greatly accentuates ur jaw line.

 

[HalfAddict]

If looks matter it is for one reason, you let them matter. Looking better and getting in shape will only boost your self confidence and therefore attractiveness...and then you will finally understand why looks don't matter.

 

[Jitterbug]

That's because working out changes your looks. Not just your body, your face too. You have to decide if your new workout face is more attractive or no. I have a picture of myself @ 28 or 29 where I was running 50 miles per week, I looked 18 in the face. When I lift I get a more squared jowl or jawline, I notice it in other guys too. It's a by product of the type of exercise you do. So yeah, you can change your face some via exercise.

This. And it also works for women. Lower body fat percentage as well as lower cortisol (the stress hormone) level from lifting make you facially more attractive.

If looks matter it is for one reason, you let them matter. Looking better and getting in shape will only boost your self confidence and therefore attractiveness...and then you will finally understand why looks don't matter.

You sound like my mate. My answer to him is always: "I'd rather have sex with the lights on, thanks."

 

[Lexington]

I think this whole "falling in love at first sight" thing is mostly just hamstering or romantic wedding talk. Think about it.....if this guy had turned out to be a complete douchebag within a few days or even weeks of meeting him, would the bride have been heartbroken for months? I highly doubt it. She probably would have denigrated his looks and told her friends that he had a tiny d*ck. She probably would have then proceeded to find another guy quite quickly.

That being said, looks DO matter. I'm not going to deny that Tom Brady probably has a much easier time picking up broads than the vast majority of men. This would be true even if he didn't have fame, wealth and status. A 6'4, well built guy with a million dollar smile is going to have an easier time picking up than a 5'9, chubby dude.

Of course, there are very few men whose looks are good enough that looks alone can carry them....we're talking top few percentiles here. For the vast majority of men, looks are just one part of the equation. Game, status, wealth and fashion sense all come into play.

Most average looking guys have the potential to score high quality tail on the regular. If they work out, they eat well, they take good care of themselves and they dress well, that alone will give them good chances with a lot of women. Throw Game and the numbers game into the equation, there's no reason why a lot of guys can't score 7s and 8s fairly regularly.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

For most women, height is a deal breaker. They want a man who is at least as tall as they are (preferably taller) when they wear heels.

Most also prefer broad shoulders and a tapering waist (the V look)

-Augustus-

 

[evan12]

I really envy guys who say they started lifting weights and then wow all of a sudden the girls are all over them. I'd love to be able to make one simple change like that and notice such a dramatic change in attraction, if only it were really that easy. For me, it's been a long, slow slog trying to build value.

that happened to me when I lost my semi-belly , I lost it within one month so it was easy to notice the change , currently girls doing more eye contact (increase about 8 times of before ) Read my story here

 

[zekko]

that happened to me when I lost my semi-belly , I lost it within one month so it was easy to notice the change , currently girls doing more eye contact (increase about 8 times of before )

I could see that if you went from fat to fit, that might make a big difference. I was originally super cardio fit, I just wasn't very muscular. So I started weight lifting and added muscle.

It wasn't that no one noticed, it's just that I didn't really see a huge difference in the amount of attraction I was getting. But I was already getting laid anyway.

 

[evan12]

same results for me. Most noticeable difference was in the bedroom but not from chicks showing interest outside of that. Could because we just raised our own standards higher .

muscles only work if it is big enough to be shown throw your clothes , otherwise it is just normal when you are with clothes .
I am now focusing on being fit because it get me a better results. my goal to have BMI < 20 ideally 15 .
After 30 most men starting loose their look and start gaining weight , so if you keep yourself in shape it will be a ++, also it will be a good passport to young women if you dont want to date older women .

 

[Jitterbug]

A man with BMI < 20 is seriously anorexic, at BMI 15 you're a skeleton.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

muscles only work if it is big enough to be shown throw your clothes , otherwise it is just normal when you are with clothes .
I am now focusing on being fit because it get me a better results. my goal to have BMI < 20 ideally 15 .
After 30 most men starting loose their look and start gaining weight , so if you keep yourself in shape it will be a ++, also it will be a good passport to young women if you dont want to date older women .

This might be one of the most uneducated things I've ever read on this board.

And BMI's don't mean shiat; body composition is everything.

The only part I agree with is your last paragraph.








PIMP

 

[MatureDJ]

For most women, height is a deal breaker. They want a man who is at least as tall as they are (preferably taller) when they wear heels.

As a sexually frusrated man of height 5' 5", I agree. :cuss:

 

[SecondHalf]

now as a married man he is a slave..his good looks literally attracted the chains that bind him

Funny!

Good looks gets doors open without requiring content yet. It's just a fact.

Looks can be augmented by fitness ... sure.
Nobody has mentioned that looks are also influenced by clothing and style.
Take a picture of yourself and consider everything you could do to improve that picture.

SH

 

[WoodB]

I am 5' 9". Since I am very lean, most women are pleasantly pleased when the clothes come off because I am well defined due to weight training. But on a night out in town, I'm just a skinny cardio guy to most women. Some women prefer lean men, some just don't. Gents, another plus side to being lean is the optical illusion factor.....your unit looks bigger!