Looking to help out the newbies

[Evzone]

Sup errbody. I've been in the game for a while, and originally found out about it through SoSuave. Read the DJ Bible way back in the day, and I haven't been active on here in a while, been on another forum (there aren't many so you can probably guess which one), and wanted to come back to get some different ideas and perspectives. I've done a boot camp and went to a "summit" with a major company (I won't mention the name if that's not allowed here but you can probably guess which one), which was very informative, and I've been doing cold approach regularly and consistently since 2012, with two breaks in between for CFA Program exams.

I started out in this though completely hard case newbie, or as it's called here AFC. I'm not saying I'm the greatest pimp of all time--yet--but I like to give back and help out where I can. I'm curious if any newbies or even intermediate guys here have any questions that might not warrant their own thread, if so let me know and I'll see what I can do to address them. Hope y'all are having a good Thanksgiving.

 

[LMFAO]

GirlChase? RSD?

 

[TheVampSlayer]

Hey, I made a thread for it not knowing that I'd get this chance. But, if you have the excuse to send only one message with a topic that you can chose, how do you build from that to allow for a second conversation and so forth?

 

[thelonewolflegend]

hey man is it possible can chat with you like through skype or text possibly i need some help and all the people do on here is piss on me most of the time when i try to get advice. greatly appreciated

 

[thelonewolflegend]

masterpaulthelegend is skype name

 

[Evzone]

GirlChase? RSD?

RSD. Didn't know if it was against forum rules to talk about other groups but yeah. Was at their Vegas World Summit this past summer and did my boot camp with Todd while I was there, but I was doing cold approach regularly since before then, prior to that was kind of dabbling and "gamed" when I had the chance or at parties/bars but wasn't like a regular thing that I did. Saw a free tour by Julien in 2012 in my old city, and that really got me motivated and off my ass to start approaching for real.

 

[Evzone]

Hey, I made a thread for it not knowing that I'd get this chance. But, if you have the excuse to send only one message with a topic that you can chose, how do you build from that to allow for a second conversation and so forth?

Can you give me some more context to answer this question more specifically?

To answer it generally though, you shouldn't need an "excuse." Your reason is she seems cool and you want to get to know her and grab a drink with her some time. Maybe literally just verbatim say that, but ideally she should know what the deal is really before you even get the number, meaning she knows this is a man to woman interaction and not friend to friend. The sole reason why you go for the number is because you can't escalate right then and there, like maybe it's the middle of the day or something or she's legitimately busy next morning or something (or whatever), so the number is just to set up a day 2 for when you CAN proceed further. Now if she's from your social circle, it can be a bit different but I'm assuming cold approach. If it's social circle, there would be a lot more case by case basis stuff that I'd say come into play. If it's cold approach, just throw the spear and see if it hits or not, since you got nothing to lose.

 

[Evzone]

Where do you normally go game? Social circles or something like that?

I'd say first get into the vibe of the place. Maybe the DJ is playing some cool music or something like that. Focus on what is good. Then really my openers are nothing too fancy, just "hey you're cute, what's your name" or "hey I'm [my name]". More important than that though is the vocal projection (talk LOUDLY...the club is a loud environment), eye contact, and tonality (end your sentences with a period or exclamation point, not a question mark, if that makes sense). It's how you take it after the opener that really matters. None of my go-to openers are really anything fancy, it's either "you're cute what's your name", "Hi I'm ___", or something specific to the situation, but I almost always go direct. If I end up indirect for whatever reason I switch it around to direct, like "blah blah blah, talking about the weather or the music...hey, by the way, you're cute, what's your name?"

I actually like clubs for a number of reasons. One, is that you have volume. Two, it's usually girls from not my regular social circle, so if you burn it down completely, who really cares? Third, it's meant to be a fun environment, so it's easy to physically escalate since dancing at clubs is a socially acceptable form of physical escalation and can lead to makeouts or pulls. For what it's worth though, I tend to do a lot better in nicer, classier clubs than just the public bars. They tend to have higher quality girls, which gets me more motivated, and also since the higher end clubs usually have some kind of barrier to entry (cover charge, dress code, exclusivity, etc.), the guys there tend to be cooler so the girls are less defensive about being approached.

 

[Evzone]

hey man is it possible can chat with you like through skype or text possibly i need some help and all the people do on here is piss on me most of the time when i try to get advice. greatly appreciated

I sent you a PM.

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

Then really my openers are nothing too fancy, just "hey you're cute, what's your name" or "hey I'm [my name]"

Not trying to give you a hard time, but I wanted to share my own perspective on this sort of opener. If it works for you, then that's great. I personally will NEVER lead with a compliment about a girl's looks. If she's really hot, then she gets random observations about her appearance regularly throughout her week. Paying a compliment right out of the gate can have a neutral or negative effect. Sure, she might think you're confident for casually tossing her a compliment, but it really won't get you any farther than saying Hey, how's it going?

Sometimes a generic comment about the atmosphere in which you find yourself is a great way to open. Talking about the club, or the bar, or the event where you're meeting this person is a much better way to break this ice, because it doesn't place the focus on them... it's lower pressure for both of you and it prevents her from automatically feeling like she has attracted you with her looks. If she's insecure about her looks, then she won't perceive you as disingenuous, and if she is confident about her looks then she'll think you may be looking at her as more than a trophy.

tl;dr
1) I NEVER lead with a compliment.
2) I ONLY compliment a girl on her personality, taste, or life choices in a first date, and sparingly. Too much and I will appear over-eager.
3) I RESERVE physical compliments for after we've developed a bit of intimacy (usually after we've slept together AT LEAST once), at the point where I believe that she'll trust that I'm not being manipulative, shallow, of deceitful.