Hi, I don't really have anyone to talk to about this so thought I'd post it here.
I got a B.S. degree in IT because I thought that since I "enjoyed computers" it would be a good fit. I would say I've done alright over the years I guess, nothing amazing to brag about, but my last few job changes have been really subpar to say the least, and, in addition to an hour long commute every day, in addition to a shifting value system, I really question my decision to enter the field and may have a job offer coming my way for a less stressful position in an IT-ish role that I’ve done before but would like to return to because it’s easy.
My current position is as a system admin for SharePoint. Don’t worry if you don’t know what it is but it’s basically a content management system that a lot of companies try to use to force a square peg into a round hole. It requires a lot of monetary support in the form of add-ins or custom development, in my opinion, to make it useable, and so to me this is stressful because a lot of my job instead focuses on the stuff in IT that I seriously don’t care about (like how can I get notifications via a workflow when one of my co-workers marks an Excel spreadsheet as “finished” or whatever). My true passion, if I had one, is for the infrastructure and hardware architecture side of things. Virtualization, etc. In addition, a lot of my time is actually spent managing people and expectations. It sounds like a good skill to pick up but from my perspective again it’s stressful because I just feel like I’m ****ing around with my time.
I’ve been in this role for around 1.5 years. I’ve been in IT since 2012 and I think after 5 or so years I just haven’t really made it to where I want to be. I started in a tier 1 capacity (think help desk but not exactly) and sort of “moved up” to this specialized application support and administration role where, before, SharePoint, I managed another product but in a much less stressful capacity. I’ve sort of realized what being in IT is all about and I’m coming to the conclusion that I believe it’s not just for me professionally. Here are my thoughts on why.
So, in my current position, I had accepted it on the personal condition that I would be taking a job in the city because I had planned to get a place in the city (the location is Houston, Texas, if it matters, but I reside in Greater SE Houston area personally). To change my lifestyle up a bit or something. Who knows.
Well, I’ve been commuting an hour to work and an hour from work since May of 2017. And it’s been draining me mentally and physically. I haven’t been able to find a place that I would consider up to my standards (which are relatively low, actually) that I believe is worth the rent. In Houston, you are paying for the convenience and location, and then everything else after that is tertiary. So rental prices are pretty marked up compared to suburbs. This is for apartments and condos. In my opinion, it’s not a practical way to spend money when I could get more for less out in the area where I live. Also, the longer time went by, the more I realized that this temporary plan of working and moving into the city made less sense because I never planned to buy in the city since it’s too expensive and because your dollar can be stretched much further outside of the city.
Secondly, I’m starting to discover slowly that I’m just not very ambitious. My primary goal is to have stable, relatively relaxed employment where I can perform primary duties during business hours and then not have to worry about anything work related after I leave. Right now in my current capacity this isn’t really possible. My co-worker is constantly bugging me via text asking if I can do something or take care of something “If I am able” when I’m off, or if I call in sick, or if we close due to bad weather. And having to deal with updates, backups, and scheduled maintenance windows during off-hours, when I just want to relax and chill in my personal space when I’m away from work, is just eating away at me. When people text me off hours for stuff I always feel like I am obligated to them because I’m being paid you know, and I hate that feeling. It’s almost like enslavement I guess. I want to just be left alone when I’m not at work.
Another thing I’m realizing is to be successful long term in IT is that you have to invest personally (financially and mentally) in your own skills away from work, on things like a home lab. A home lab is where you purchase computer equipment and set it up in a way that closely resembles enterprise architecture so you can pick up skills and learn things that are applicable to the workforce (e.g. so you can move up or find another job). I’ve sunk a lot of money into buying equipment and over time my requirements have just constantly changed so much that I’ve gotten zero value out of it. At this point staying in IT and continuing down this path is just sunk costs fallacy 101. It’s draining me mentally. Instead of buying this stupid computer crap and “furthering my skills” outside of work I’d rather just have a relatively stress free and okay-ish paying job where I can accumulate money from pay checks over a few years of being salaried and get into real estate (obviously on a suburban scale, I am not deluding myself by thinking I am going to be flipping properties like they do in LA for example).
So, I have the opportunity to accept a position at an employer that is much closer to where I currently live, however, there is a very good chance I’ll take a minor pay cut and that the position while somewhat loosely related to IT, could probably shoe-horn me back into a role where IT is sort of like a secondary growth path (or non-existent), if that makes sense. But in my opinion the benefits to me are huge. I would be able to continue to live out where I already currently am and stay at an apartment paying what I believe to be fair rent prices. And the commute would be halved. No longer would I be waking up at 5:00 AM, drained every morning, to leave by 5:30 AM just to get to work at 6:30 AM, and then eventually getting home at 6:00 PM. I could return to a normal wake at 6:30, leave at 7:30, and be there at 8 and be home by 5:30 PM schedule. The position would be less stressful and less demanding of my time outside of working hours since the role would involve supporting a product that is not hosted by the employer (it’s in the cloud basically).
Having discovered that my personal values have shifted away so much from career ambition and long term employment growth (which again I don’t care that much about, my only real desire is to have stable employment that pays a decent enough wage for me to live on my own and just relax) it just seems like this is a good choice to make for long term mental and physical well-being. But here’s the kicker. My decision making process is so bad that I really can’t tell if these are the right choices for me. If I’m selling myself short or otherwise. I feel like everything I’m telling myself is a true reflection of my being but in our modern society it is hard to feel okay with decisions and myself because everyone is encouraged to be ambitious and to “get out and there climb the ladder” and to reach the top.
Thank you for your thoughts, considerations, and opinions in advance.
