Loner?

Hennessy

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Whats up all? Nice site and forum... I'm trying to adapt confidence but there is always something in the way. I am cool with being a loner meaning I don't want any friends and I'm not social. I feel friends hold you back in life but seriously I'm not interested. I think introvert fits me.

Now my issue, I need a main chick. Having no social status leaves me unattractive. I'm hoping me being self-conscious about it is to blame, I mean I can't tell if my self-consciousness is that obvious but if I'm thinking about it then I'm sure a woman can detect it.

Break down -
Insecure about not having friends...
Why?
Because its normal to almost everyone I see

So... Do I got to have friends and goto clubs and parties and get togethers to have a social and pretty woman? Or can I pull it off?

BTW, one night stands are simple procedures for me... (If that helps)
 

slaog

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Hennessy said:
Whats up all? Nice site and forum... I'm trying to adapt confidence but there is always something in the way. I am cool with being a loner meaning I don't want any friends and I'm not social. I feel friends hold you back in life but seriously I'm not interested. I think introvert fits me.

Now my issue, I need a main chick. Having no social status leaves me unattractive. I'm hoping me being self-conscious about it is to blame, I mean I can't tell if my self-consciousness is that obvious but if I'm thinking about it then I'm sure a woman can detect it.

Break down -
Insecure about not having friends...
Why?
Because its normal to almost everyone I see

So... Do I got to have friends and goto clubs and parties and get togethers to have a social and pretty woman? Or can I pull it off?

BTW, one night stands are simple procedures for me... (If that helps)

Why label yourself like that? You can be introverty or extrovert depending on how you think. You can change from an introvert to an extrovert too as many people do. Never put yourself into a box because it stops you from developing as a person.


So although you might be introverted in the present time its not set in stone. Develop yourself and making friends will seem normal to you too.


Girls like social status because it says that a person is valued highly. You don't need social status to be a high value man. That comes from your head. Think and be high value and you will be to others.
 

kraytkiller

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If you want to have a social woman your going to have to be, or your going to become, a social person.

You think she'll just have a ghost for a boyfriend if she's a social person? No. She'd drag you to stuff. Introduce you to people. If you don't want that you've got to think of what you want.
 

londonzen

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how can i explain this if you are seriously confident being a loner then it would be fine(hardly anybody seriously is)
like i remeber my first girlfriend who i met at college(i was often alone) would tell me first she thought i was weird as i had friends but chose to not be with them but she realised i was very comfortable in my own skin.
it amazed her sometimes she would phone me and id be in my room alone telling her to phone me back latter as im playing video games(the cheek i was so ****y then) then then next day id be at a friends with boys/girls just messing about or on the street late at night with friends and the next day sittin at my nans watching nature shows.
basically she loved that i was comfortable enough to say this to her

secondly i consider my self a loner a little but i still have friends and like to go out or chill in doors.


if you had a girl wat would your week involve? how much time would you spend with/phoning her and wat would you do when your apart?

the reason i ask is, this is where i feel the prob would lie ie youd grow to dependant on her for comfort/social/love/chat/sex/friendship all in 1 which in turn would smother her?

get back to me
 

Hennessy

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Yes, I do happen to smother this chick and she goes away but for some reason she will come back, usually just to realize that I'm smothering her again. I'm sick of blowing this chick away as she seems very interested.

You are probably going to conclude that I am not a loner and need attention like most people. I am fine with being alone and I seriously prefer it. Well, why do I smother her then? I dunno. I do know everyone else doesn't agree with me being alone and I am quickly judged and thought of as depressed. That may play a big issue.

Also, I don't like going out and being social. I have good friends who I can be with 24/7 if I wanted to, I choose not to. Friendships are boring and a waste of time.

My spare time? Constantly learning and teaching myself about everything. Rarely watch tv/play games unless drunk or high. Money and goals stay on my mind also. Basicly, my time is about me.

I'm not to fond of having chicks as sex-buddies so I look for relationship in most women and unless I'm drunk I will decline their sexual needs.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

GQ_Confidence_1

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Hennessy said:
Whats up all? Nice site and forum... I'm trying to adapt confidence but there is always something in the way. I am cool with being a loner meaning I don't want any friends and I'm not social. I feel friends hold you back in life but seriously I'm not interested. I think introvert fits me.

Now my issue, I need a main chick. Having no social status leaves me unattractive. I'm hoping me being self-conscious about it is to blame, I mean I can't tell if my self-consciousness is that obvious but if I'm thinking about it then I'm sure a woman can detect it.

Break down -
Insecure about not having friends...
Why?
Because its normal to almost everyone I see

So... Do I got to have friends and goto clubs and parties and get togethers to have a social and pretty woman? Or can I pull it off?

BTW, one night stands are simple procedures for me... (If that helps)
I think there's a big difference between being a loner, who spends all summer in his basement, playing d&d, has bad personal hygiene, unkept clothes...like some of those guys on the show beauty and the geek. Thats a very awkward loner.

But if you're comfortable being with yourself and you can socialize, and you know a little game...should be slam dunk easy, regardless if you have friends or not.

Not sure if you guys have been following, there's this 17 year old kid, Zac Sunderland who has been sailing around the world solo. You can read his blog at zacsunderland.com. Really amazing story.

He's not worrying about whether he's a loner or not, or worrying about a label. During some of his stop overs at different ports, he has these pictures on his site of him hanging out with these cute young girls. Those girls dont care whether he's alone or not or if he's following the right rules.

Far too many arbitrary rules out there IMO.
 
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