LISTEN!! Stop going to bars, stop going to clubs and instead

[HalfAddict]

I've been wanting to take up dancing for over a year now, just got the means to do to and I'll be startin my first class in November.

To all you naysayers, keep talkin and not doin, thats why you're still a ****in chode.

The women in dance classes are simply a side effect of going to learn to dance, not the cause.

No **** a salsa class does not have all the answers, you do, when ya gonna use em instead of smack talking like a keyboard champ on sosuave?

 

[f283000]

I've been wanting to take up dancing for over a year now, just got the means to do to and I'll be startin my first class in November.

To all you naysayers, keep talkin and not doin, thats why you're still a ****in chode.

HalfAddict congrats! Any questions or advice feel free to pm me or post something here.

The women in dance classes are simply a side effect of going to learn to dance, not the cause.

Very true and a key point. There are things in life that bring you the added benefit of meeting women easily (for example being a musician). But you shouldn't learn to play music because you want to get women. You should learn because you love music/want to learn to play music. The same can be said about learning to dance.

It doesn't stop all the guys signing up for classes just to meet women and frankly that's ok. Yes their mentality is wrong but I rather have guys learning to dance than playing xbox as a hobbie or standing around with a drink in hand at a hip hop club or bar. Most end up liking it and leave their old habits behind, and they still get all the self improvement that comes from learning to dance.

Go into dancing with a mentality of improving yourself. Meeting women is an added benefit that comes naturally once you get into dancing you don't even have to worry about it. I know most guys in this forum come from a mentality of a lack of meeting women so it's hard for them to understand that. But once you become a regular in the dance scene it will end your trouble with meeting women forever. You won't have to worry about that anymore just worry about learning to dance. The rest will take care of it self.

 

[Wolfgang D]

Good to hear, HalfAddict, and good luck!

Guys, I often come off as sarcastic in this forum. But that is when I see keyboard jockeys who are just spouting bits of theory and that's all they do, so obviously not trying any of this out in real life. I will always be supportive of a guy who writes about trying something in real life, or who has girlfriend troubles, who is asking for advice on how to approach at work, etc - someone who makes a post showing that he is actually doing something.

By contrast, the keyboard jockeys will more often than not shoot down posts by the guy who is doing something. "You got a girlfriend? You're an idiot!" "Don't try that!" "You're acting like a loser!" "Next that b!tch!"

The difference between doers and poseurs cuts through SoSuave like the Berlin Wall.

I would have to agree with this. Back in the day I joined and my dance partners were a 45 year old drunk women and then a 47 year old handicap women. The hot girls all had partners and their boyfriends wouldn't let them out of their sight. Subsequently went to a Friday night open salsa dance free for all and there were 20 guys trying to get with 3 girls.

I think salsa is a good way to touch girls if you have issues and coordinate your body if you can't dance, but to meet a hot girl at salsa and have sex with her, chances are low. Girls there don't want sex or a boyfriend, they want to learn dance for themselves. Girls at bars are often a different story.

Sorry to hear of that bad experience. In my experience, the girls at salsa/bachata events are mostly in their twenties, some in their thirties, and single. I guess it's different venues.

well, in a manner i did. i mean why should it be one OR the other? on can do both, and combine.
and yes, i support the salsa idea. i take salsa lessons for a year now and it did wonders to my social life. it brought me a new social circle, and new friends. also new lays.

Yep, sorry, I was being sarcastic because of looking at another thread right before this one, which made me think of posters just stalling the conversation. Glad to hear you had success with this. I am going to another salsa event tomorrow. It beats going after Low Interest plates that I finally decided to stop trying for.




Regarding this and any other advice: Let's remember, nothing can be very easy. Because there are so many guys wanting to hook up with new women. If there was a very easy way to meet women, it would fill up with guys, and then it wouldn't be so easy anymore. The threshold that keeps out the hordes at salsa/bachata class is, of course, that you have to dance. But once you get over that threshold by learning to dance, you have a good hunting ground.

Salsa can be difficult, yes. As I mentioned earlier, I like bachata more, I think it is easier. But these are always found in the same place.

 

[Wolfgang D]

point is no matter what your hobby or interest is, you are bound to meet *gasp* chicks that like it too!.

That is true but also irrelevant. It is about numbers, as stated frequently here. I have other hobbies where I also meet girls, but there are very few singles to choose from.

 

[Smoothsailing]

Yes

I'm a woman, and a salsa dancer.

I don't agree with a lot of what is said on this forum, but I agree with this.

Every salsa club I've been to - there are always more women than men, and we women are always waiting and wanting men to come and ask us to dance.

In a normal club I prefer to dance by myself or with girlfriends. I'm not really that open to being approached.

I think the interaction is much easier and more natural at a salsa club. There's no pressure and it doesn't feel like there are any expectations.
I dance with someone and we have a nice dance but no sparks fly, and he says thank you and goes to dance with someone else.
If we are really enjoying ourselves he might suggest that we continue dancing, or we take a break and chat.

 

[f283000]

36 salsa moves with table of contents so you can skip to watch the moves you want.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aV8dS2m9Adc

easy stuff you can debut at the clubs the same night. Just record the move on your phone so you can watch it a couple times at the clubs in case you forget.

 

[f283000]

If you learn Bachata you could end up like this guy. Having a circle full of girls surrounding you fighting to dance close with you! I feared for his safety for a minute ha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgmQ9F8mV28

 

[f283000]

any questions?

 

[backbreaker]

I have to chime in and agree 10000% with the OP.


This was my christmas gift to my wife, one of them, the year before last, in 2012 the end of it. She can't dance to save her life lol and we both always liked salsa so i said hey let's sign up. So we went and did it, and fort he most part, evertyhing the OP says it's true. it's really physical, its a lot of kino, and not only that, you are actually learning how to dance. it's good just for that. if anything you can take your new dance skills and actually be more confident when you go to a regular club that you can move a little.


anyway, femals everywhere. some had men, but there were a few single ones, more than a few. very open,l you aren't dealing with 20 year old college girls you are dealing with 25+ up women who are more open / friendly and open minded enough to try salsa dancing


if i were single i would have cleaned house. if i ever get a divorce, kthat's one of the first things i'm going to do. but it's no real fun without my wife, and after like, 3 classes she just wasn't feeling it anymore so we stopped going



anyway i would say, i would only bother if you live in LA, Boston, NY, Washington, maybe Chicago. i would not try my luck at a salsa dancing class in freaking north carolina lol. lord knows what might walk in there.

 

[f283000]

Thanks for that backbreaker.

There's an old famous saying "couples that dance together stay together." Dancing is a great way to keep a relationship healthy. You leading your partner on the dance floor and the trust it entails, the kino of it all, plus the traditional gender role it enforces (she being the follower etc) it's all a wonderful thing for couples and keeping a woman attracted/increasing her attraction to you.

Salsa does have its dangers if you are in a relationship. I have been struggling a lot mentally with my relationship with the temptations of cheating on my girlfriend. Salsa puts you in contact with so many women it really tests you and tempts you as a man not trying to f**** them all. I literally have to stop myself from talking to girls I dance with and putting game on them. Salsa makes it so much easier to do that to them, but having a girlfriend I literally have to fight temptation every night.

My current girlfriend just might be the last girlfriend I will have because I don't plan to have another girlfriend so I don't have to struggle anymore with this issue. I'm not the type that goes around hurting women so I think I will not commit myself again to a relationship if i'm going to keep being in the salsa scene. The temptation and ease that salsa gives you to have women is a mental struggle that you have to fight with every night when you have a relationship if you are the righteous/non cheating type. It's better if you don't commit to anyone so no feelings are hurt.

If you are divorced or are single there really isn't a thing that is better than salsa. It really puts you in direct contact with women. There's no hoping to get lucky one night hoping to talk to a girl like in hip hop clubs. Partner dancing is just the ultimate ice breaker. You are in direct contact with a woman for 3+ minutes dancing with her for a song and leading her on the dance floor. It just makes it so much easy to break the ice that itself is the ice breaker.

If you are 21 or older the only thing I can say is try it out don't waste your time and money at the hip hop clubs. Your muscles aren't old you will learn it quick, and it will be easy for you to add flavor to your dance due to young muscle memory. If you start salsa when you're young you will be unstoppable, and you will enjoy an active sex life for the rest of your life without much problems.

 

[Mike32ct]

I do ballroom because salsa isn't really my thing, but I fully support this thread. Great stuff OP!

 

[Partizan]

I do both ballroom and salsa.

Salsa has become a sausage fest in recent years where I live (NC). I think the word has gotten out. Ballroom tends to have more older folks and couples. I also feel odd about gaming women in my ballroom studio since I see them often and they are part of my social circle. I don't want others in the studio to think I'm just there to hook up.

But in general, I agree with OP. Much better way to meet women than bars and clubs. And you also learn how to dance, which has a lot of benefits other than just meeting women.

 

[blind_one]

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to f283000 and Wolfgang D again.

Very fruitful and informative discussion.

I'm most certain that I'll try that in near future when I get sometime to expand my life even further.

 

[Zarky]

I didn't read the entire thread but I have one worry about this:

If some hunky latino dude is giving both you and your wife lessons, would he be, in essence, AMOGging you?

I'd want some woman giving us lessons. Or an old, ugly guy. Or get good on your own and then teach your girl how to do it.

It's like taking any sort of lessons with a woman. If another guy (especially if he's better looking than you) is giving both of you lessons, he is sort of de facto AMOGging you, even if he's a super nice guy.

 

[Mike32ct]

I didn't read the entire thread but I have one worry about this:

If some hunky latino dude is giving both you and your wife lessons, would he be, in essence, AMOGging you?

I'd want some woman giving us lessons. Or an old, ugly guy. Or get good on your own and then teach your girl how to do it.

It's like taking any sort of lessons with a woman. If another guy (especially if he's better looking than you) is giving both of you lessons, he is sort of de facto AMOGging you, even if he's a super nice guy.

I prefer female dance teachers too. For one thing, they can usually lead AND follow. If the class has an unbalanced ratio of men and women (which is usually the case), a female instructor can easily dance with a girl or guy who doesn't have a partner. But a male instructor is not going to want to dance with another dude, generally lol.

But back on topic, to answer the question, yes sort of. He might not be intentionally AMOGing you, but a hunky dance instructor might well lower your value slightly as your chick might (unfairly) compare you to him.

But this thread isn't really about couples. It's about single guys. If you are single guy learning dance, then you could learn from either a male or female.

But if I found a gf in class and we wanted to take a private lesson together, I'd get a chick or gay guy or old dude as an instructor.

 

[skinnyguy]

Do hotties go to salsa clubs?

I don't want to be forced to dance with a 350 lb middle aged woman. Would rather spend $200 at the club. At least I'm having fun there.

 

[f283000]

I do ballroom because salsa isn't really my thing, but I fully support this thread. Great stuff OP!

I recommend any form of partner dancing. Salsa, ballroom, swing, tango, whatever it is. Ballroom is the only one i haven't tried. My plan is to get good at them all. Gives me more chances to meet new people and women

If you can teach a woman more than one dance you really become powerful.

But in general, I agree with OP. Much better way to meet women than bars and clubs. And you also learn how to dance, which has a lot of benefits other than just meeting women.

I feel sorry for any guy wasting his time going to bars to meet women. It's just not productive and really a waste of time. Take a girl on a date to a bar for drinks that's productive, but don't go on a sarge mission to a bar!

Yes like I said meeting women is a benefit that comes with dancing much like meeting women is a benefit that comes with being a musician or many other things that can put you in contact/make you attractive to women.