LISTEN!! Stop going to bars, stop going to clubs and instead

[Wolfgang D]

Spooky, I was thinking of posting a thread about salsa/bachata after this weekend, when I went to a two-hour dance class followed by free dance and socializing, but now I see f283000 beat me to it.

It is true, most people you see in the classes aren't Latinos. And that is because it is simply a good dance for socializing, so that is why more people are drawn to it. The basic steps are easy to learn - I don't have any particular talent for dancing, but I still get by well after just a few sessions.

Plus, it's the women who move the most. It is easier for men.

Here is a short video, note how even in this beyond-basic bachata the woman moves more than the man:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2fD8593lr4

However, it is the man who leads. By lifting a hand, pressing a hand against her back, letting go of one of her hands etc, he will indicate which move to do next. So you have a man calling the shots, and the woman obeying by making sensual moves. It's a pretty good deal. Plus, it's good exercise, and people are always in a good mood.

Also: a lot of the time you will have slightly more women than men showing up. It's a pretty good place to be a man.

 

[rascal99v]

When someone on here tells you to stop doing something, you should always do the opposite.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=200811

Salsa Dancing anyone?

So, salsa dancing is going to help cure all the problems that men have with women? hmmm Interesting.

What happens when there is no salsa clubs in your neck of the woods? What about an overweight guy with no coordination? Will salsa dancing help him get touched and rubbed down by women? Will the skinny socially awkward virgin suddenly become the coolest guy on the dance floor? Why would you go salsa dancing when you are already doing well at clubs and bars? You know, it's easy to sit behind a computer and tell guys to stop doing things when you don't know what they have going with their situations.

quesiton OP have you hooked up with chicks in this setting cause if you haven't this is all KJ rubbish

You should know all about being a KJ, right?

 

[f283000]

So, salsa dancing is going to help cure all the problems that men have with women? hmmm Interesting.

Of course not brother I don't think I ever said that, did I? My thread is to expose the fellas here to salsa dancing and why it's 1000% better than going to sausagefests (hip hop clubs) or bars.

What happens when there is no salsa clubs in your neck of the woods?

That sucks now wouldn't it perhaps another form of partner dancing?

What about an overweight guy with no coordination?

Dancing is great exercise it would definitely help him lose some weight

Coordination can be learned there is no such thing as having 2 left feet. Learning to dance is to make your body do things it wasn't used to or has never done it's all muscle memory and self improvement. It takes time or might take little time. For me it took a long time I was horrible I had to work really hard to improve myself, and now women ask me to dance every night

Ive seen guys learn in a few months what took me a year but I don't hate i'm happy for them. I understand nobody is the same muscle memory is not the same for everyone.

Will the skinny socially awkward virgin suddenly become the coolest guy on the dance floor?

If there is anything that can help change a socially awkward virgin it is partner dancing which puts men in direct contact with women they can't avoid them. It will push him to face his fears and give him the confidence he needs with women because it will force him to interact with women like never before.

If you're a skinny socially awkward virgin then sign up for classes now!

Why would you go salsa dancing when you are already doing well at clubs and bars?

I already listed all the benefits I don't think I need to waste time on this but I will reiterate something. In partner dancing places whether it be salsa, swing whatever THE MAN HAS AN ADVANTAGE as opposed to hip hop clubs where men have no advantage at all.

Advantage in salsa clubs not just because the # of women is even to men or even greater than your average sausagefest at a hip hop club, but because he leads the woman in dancing (and the fact it is a partner dance so women are forced to dance with men).

So if you're doing well in bars/clubs that means you already have some game/confidence. Combine that with learning to dance and going to places where it isn't a sausagefest every night then that gives you an even greater advantage.

IT IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE having to use some opener/pua trick to try and game a girl at a hip hop club sausagefest where she knows men are up to no good and she is soaking up all the attention, compared to just asking a girl to dance at a salsa club which is nonthreatening and standard, doing natural kino on her for 3-4 minutes through dancing thus increasing her comfort/attraction for you, and then putting game on her. It's like night and day difference. In one song you touch a girl more than she's been touched in months! Now that's kino! Salsa is crazy when you think about it. It puts women in a lot of danger for guys that know what they're doing

Dancing just makes the game way easier. If you're doing game at a hip hop club/bar you are actually working harder than you should for women.

 

[ebracer05]

I don't know why everyone is so hostile towards the idea of Salsa dancing... I really enjoyed it and it was an awesome way to meet and hookup with women. If a guy is going to go hang out at a club all night trying to get laid, I would vote the salsa club is going to be the most effective place to go. If you enjoy it, an added bonus.

 

[Wolfgang D]

I don't know why everyone is so hostile towards the idea of Salsa dancing... I really enjoyed it and it was an awesome way to meet and hookup with women. If a guy is going to go hang out at a club all night trying to get laid, I would vote the salsa club is going to be the most effective place to go. If you enjoy it, an added bonus.

It surprises me too. I can see some possible reasons: First, that f283000 suggests something instead of bars/clubs, which people perceive as criticism of them when they have focused on cold approaches at bars/clubs. Second, that he suggests something that is a happy cooperation between men and women. Third, that he suggests something that many people think they can't do.

For example:

So, salsa dancing is going to help cure all the problems that men have with women? hmmm Interesting.

Strawman argument. He never said it would cure all problems.

What happens when there is no salsa clubs in your neck of the woods?

Also a strawman argument. f283000 didn't say he demands that everyone do salsa, no matter what their geographical circumstances. He suggested it for those who have the means to do so - the same underlying condition for every suggestion given here. You know that. We don't need to write a list of saving clauses after a suggestion.

What about an overweight guy with no coordination? Will salsa dancing help him get touched and rubbed down by women? Will the skinny socially awkward virgin suddenly become the coolest guy on the dance floor?

Fat and awkwardness make any suggestion ever made here more difficult. So you can use that counter-argument to strike down anything, if you are so inclined.

Why would you go salsa dancing when you are already doing well at clubs and bars?

Or if you are a millionaire? Or if you are Superman? Or if you live in a religious collective where every man has twenty women? Again an argument that can be used against any suggestion: "If someone already has success, why should he follow your suggestion?"

f283000 didn't say that you should abandon something if it works well for you. But the average SS visitors will have some trouble at bars and clubs, or they wouldn't be here. So f283000 suggests something that fills pretty much the same niche, a place where you go out in the evening to meet people, but one that he thinks might work better for those who like to go out.

You know, it's easy to sit behind a computer and tell guys to stop doing things when you don't know what they have going with their situations.

Give it a rest. He made a suggestion - that's what we do here. We suggest solutions to each other. You didn't like his suggestion, so you throw in a lot of counters that could be used for pretty much anything. Look back at your post and you know I am right. If you are a stand-up guy you will offer f283000 an apology when your head has cooled down.

 

[f283000]

Great post Wolfgang!

Trust me I know where most guys that might attack this come from because I was one of them. I was at the hip hop club/bar scene 3 nights a week, EVERY WEEK! I even used to think salsa dancing was gay as well!

So all arguments done against it come from a place that I used to be in and I know very well, and that place is a place of IGNORANCE AND FEAR. Ignorance and fear of the unknown.

I wish somebody had made a thread like this years ago and opened my mind to something different. I wish I had not wasted so many years of my life in the hip hop club scene/bar scene and instead had started Salsa earlier. I'd probably be an instructor and would be an incredible dancer by now with all those extra years of dance experience

I don't know why everyone is so hostile towards the idea of Salsa dancing...

I answered with the above. But to reiterate it really is just ignorance and fear of the unknown.

For a lot of guys if not most guys dancing is as scary to them as saying hi to a girl walking the street. It comes down to a lack of confidence in doing something that will challenge them (dancing) much like saying hi to a stranger.

 

[Wolfgang D]

Edit, I see f283000 made a post while I was making mine in reply to the earlier post:

For a lot of guys if not most guys dancing is as scary to them as saying hi to a girl walking the street. It comes down to a lack of confidence in doing something that will challenge them (dancing) much like saying hi to a stranger.

Yes, it is a bit intimidating, I will admit that too. And yes, it's like cold approaches. You have to get over the threshold. Then suddenly you discover something new that you haven't seen before. Like you, I wish someone had made me try salsa and bachata much earlier. (I actually prefer bachata.) I would have saved so much time that I spent in venues with much less probability of a reward.

Another thing: women think that guys who can dance look sexier and more brave. And guys who try a dance like salsa, which takes some training, look even more impressive. (We might think that women would "appreciate you for you", but we know better. That's not how guys work, that's not how girls work.) Here's a test: tell a girl you know how to do salsa. See if it counts for you or against you. It always counts in your favor. It is just some guys who will hold it against you. And who is it you are trying to impress?

IT IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE[/B] having to use some opener/pua trick to try and game a girl at a hip hop club sausagefest where she knows men are up to no good and she is soaking up all the attention, compared to just asking a girl to dance at a salsa club which is nonthreatening and standard, doing natural kino on her for 3-4 minutes through dancing thus increasing her comfort/attraction for you, and then putting game on her. It's like night and day difference. In one song you touch a girl more than she's been touched in months! Now that's kino! Salsa is crazy when you think about it. It puts women in a lot of danger for guys that know what they're doing

Dancing just makes the game way easier. If you're doing game at a hip hop club/bar you are actually working harder than you should for women.

("Sausagefest" is a slur against men. We never see people talking about "clamfest" in public. But I digress.)

Yes, it is a huge difference indeed. The kino is amazing. You feel, "Is it actually okay for me to do this?" You are holding her hands, or you are holding one hand over her bra strap. Your hips and thighs touch each other in certain movements. You are close. It breaks down the distance between you. You smile and small-talk a little while dancing. It is much easier to talk afterward when you are getting some water by the water cooler. (You will drink a lot. That also becomes a way to socialize, hanging around the water cooler and chatting a bit.)

I am not one to jump on every fad because it is foreign. There was a Roman physician who wrote, more than two thousand years ago, that Romans would try any medicine as long as it had a foreign (Greek, Egyptian, etc) name. Kind of funny, because people behave the same today. But salsa/bachata/etc really works.

Let's be honest: Women go there to be part of the group. Men go there to hook up with women. But women also go there to feel sensual in a way that can be excused. So they are already one step into that mood. The women who don't want to be touched by men don't go to salsa.

Those who don't want to try, no one is forcing you. Those who recognize that this is a pretty good opportunity, don't hesitate, go for it. You can probably find a try-it-once, beginner's class somewhere. This is actually fairly easy, and something you can do after three classes. And note that it is the woman who has to be sexy, by moving her hips in the right way, while the man mostly sticks to some basic steps. And again: there are usually more women than men there. This is a sensual pickup opportunity served for you on a platter.

 

[cordoncordon]

Trying doing martial arts in a nightclub or on a dance floor, you look like a queer.

( I also practice martial arts but not for the night club. )

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTEzMzA3ODIw.html <-- This is dancing 2013.

Brah, Zyzz was dancing like that years ago before ANYONE knew about it. Zyzz brah is the true revolutionary here, as seen below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veyAhNUwmPI

 

[cordoncordon]

Great post Wolfgang!

Trust me I know where most guys that might attack this come from because I was one of them. I was at the hip hop club/bar scene 3 nights a week, EVERY WEEK! I even used to think salsa dancing was gay as well!

So all arguments done against it come from a place that I used to be in and I know very well, and that place is a place of IGNORANCE AND FEAR. Ignorance and fear of the unknown.

I wish somebody had made a thread like this years ago and opened my mind to something different. I wish I had not wasted so many years of my life in the hip hop club scene/bar scene and instead had started Salsa earlier. I'd probably be an instructor and would be an incredible dancer by now with all those extra years of dance experience

I answered with the above. But to reiterate it really is just ignorance and fear of the unknown.

For a lot of guys if not most guys dancing is as scary to them as saying hi to a girl walking the street. It comes down to a lack of confidence in doing something that will challenge them (dancing) much like saying hi to a stranger.

F283000 I have to say your 'rebirth' as it were is amazing. You really sound like a very well adjusted and happy person. Compared to the somewhat grump that you were before, it is amazing the turnaround in attitude. Congrats.

And I agree with your advice btw. While salsa dancing is not for me, I have had numerous friends tell me they score left and right at their salsa classes.

 

[f283000]

F283000 I have to say your 'rebirth' as it were is amazing. You really sound like a very well adjusted and happy person. Compared to the somewhat grump that you were before, it is amazing the turnaround in attitude. Congrats.

And I agree with your advice btw. While salsa dancing is not for me, I have had numerous friends tell me they score left and right at their salsa classes.

I appreciate your words I really do cordoncordon. I find it very interesting (and a funny coincidence, or maybe a sign?) that you make your post here. Maybe an hour or so before I was looking at the curvygirls thread on anything else just looking back at the old posts, and saw my attacks against you from years back. What a coincidence you posting in this thread like an hour later. A thread which is about salsa which gave me my first asian girlfriend which relates to what I used to attack you on in that thread and everywhere

I see it as a sign. Much like I was ignorant and fearful of what I didn't know then when it came to my attacks against you the same came be said for those that attack salsa.

What you say is true it is not for everyone nothing really is. But hopefully this thread has opened the eyes of the fellas in this forum to another option they have for a hobbie which is fun, and is great for meeting women and self improvement. Much more so than what they are used to at hip hop clubs and bars in my opinion.

 

[CrimsonPanther]

what if i actually go to salsa, AND to clubs? O_O

 

[Wolfgang D]

what if i actually go to salsa, AND to clubs? O_O

What if you made a post that contributed to the topic?

 

[CrimsonPanther]

What if you made a post that contributed to the topic?

well, in a manner i did. i mean why should it be one OR the other? on can do both, and combine.
and yes, i support the salsa idea. i take salsa lessons for a year now and it did wonders to my social life. it brought me a new social circle, and new friends. also new lays.

 

[f283000]

("Sausagefest" is a slur against men. We never see people talking about "clamfest" in public. But I digress.)

I understand where you're coming from, but I mean it in a way to emphasize that as a guy wanting to meet women you are at a disadvantage going into places where men far outnumber women.

A smart man puts himself in situations where he has an advantage so he is more likely to succeed. When you have 5-10 guys for every girl at your average hip hop club you have no advantage whatsoever. You are swimming against the tide, and are having to put double the effort into meeting women.

I'm not trying to be a feminist i'm just trying to emphasize that point and drill it to guy's heads here that they have their work cut out for them at "sausage fests."

 

[rascal99v]

Of course not brother I don't think I ever said that, did I? My thread is to expose the fellas here to salsa dancing and why it's 1000% better than going to sausagefests (hip hop clubs) or bars.

That sucks now wouldn't it perhaps another form of partner dancing?

Dancing is great exercise it would definitely help him lose some weight

Coordination can be learned there is no such thing as having 2 left feet. Learning to dance is to make your body do things it wasn't used to or has never done it's all muscle memory and self improvement. It takes time or might take little time. For me it took a long time I was horrible I had to work really hard to improve myself, and now women ask me to dance every night

Ive seen guys learn in a few months what took me a year but I don't hate i'm happy for them. I understand nobody is the same muscle memory is not the same for everyone.

If there is anything that can help change a socially awkward virgin it is partner dancing which puts men in direct contact with women they can't avoid them. It will push him to face his fears and give him the confidence he needs with women because it will force him to interact with women like never before.

If you're a skinny socially awkward virgin then sign up for classes now!

I already listed all the benefits I don't think I need to waste time on this but I will reiterate something. In partner dancing places whether it be salsa, swing whatever THE MAN HAS AN ADVANTAGE as opposed to hip hop clubs where men have no advantage at all.

Advantage in salsa clubs not just because the # of women is even to men or even greater than your average sausagefest at a hip hop club, but because he leads the woman in dancing (and the fact it is a partner dance so women are forced to dance with men).

So if you're doing well in bars/clubs that means you already have some game/confidence. Combine that with learning to dance and going to places where it isn't a sausagefest every night then that gives you an even greater advantage.

IT IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE having to use some opener/pua trick to try and game a girl at a hip hop club sausagefest where she knows men are up to no good and she is soaking up all the attention, compared to just asking a girl to dance at a salsa club which is nonthreatening and standard, doing natural kino on her for 3-4 minutes through dancing thus increasing her comfort/attraction for you, and then putting game on her. It's like night and day difference. In one song you touch a girl more than she's been touched in months! Now that's kino! Salsa is crazy when you think about it. It puts women in a lot of danger for guys that know what they're doing

Dancing just makes the game way easier. If you're doing game at a hip hop club/bar you are actually working harder than you should for women.

You gave a well written response. The problem I have with it is this. When I go to a club I know I'm going to meet women that I want. If not, I'll go to another club 10 minutes away. Going out of my way to a salsa club might not be worth if if there are no women there that I find attractive. I just wasted time going to that place. You gave off the impression that the salsa club will help you get women. If guys can't dance or there are no places near them, it wont help them. If the women don't find them attractive, it's a bust. So, a bar would be better for them imo.

 

[f283000]

The following is for all the non-dancers (and dancers too)

Salsa and the stiff upper lip - the English perspective on Latin Dance
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rqk6KefHBpo

An English guy with 2 left feet take on Salsa dancing. He put Salsa music into a philosophical analysis.

SALSA
"The musical way to get a good looking girl's clothes off"
Urban dictionary

 

[cervantesscthree]

why the hell are you guys wasting your time dancing when you could be doing a martial art instead

I agree but you can always do both :cheer:

 

[Trump]

You gave a well written response. The problem I have with it is this. When I go to a club I know I'm going to meet women that I want. If not, I'll go to another club 10 minutes away. Going out of my way to a salsa club might not be worth if if there are no women there that I find attractive. I just wasted time going to that place. You gave off the impression that the salsa club will help you get women. If guys can't dance or there are no places near them, it wont help them. If the women don't find them attractive, it's a bust. So, a bar would be better for them imo.

I would have to agree with this. Back in the day I joined and my dance partners were a 45 year old drunk women and then a 47 year old handicap women. The hot girls all had partners and their boyfriends wouldn't let them out of their sight. Subsequently went to a Friday night open salsa dance free for all and there were 20 guys trying to get with 3 girls.

I think salsa is a good way to touch girls if you have issues and coordinate your body if you can't dance, but to meet a hot girl at salsa and have sex with her, chances are low. Girls there don't want sex or a boyfriend, they want to learn dance for themselves. Girls at bars are often a different story.

 

[f283000]

I think salsa is a good way to touch girls if you have issues and coordinate your body if you can't dance, but to meet a hot girl at salsa and have sex with her, chances are low.

I can tell you the opposite from experience and just about every other salsa regular in the world disagrees as well

You shouldn't judge it based on a bad experience in one place although it's too bad you seem to be stuck in a place where there are are a lot more guys than women. Luckily for most men out there not just salsa clubs are more even in terms of #s of men/women, but salsa classes at dance studios as well (in most classes women far outnumber guys).

Of course there are sausage fests in some places like in Trump's case they do happen, but they are much more rare at salsa unlike hip hop clubs.

Girls there don't want sex or a boyfriend, they want to learn dance for themselves. Girls at bars are often a different story.

Girls can't learn to dance for themselves because they need to dance with a man.

And I would have to disagree with the rest as well. Salsa is a high contact sport. It gets girls very horny specially if you know what you're doing which most guys will learn with enough practice.

My friend got his current girlfriend a minute into his first song with her. I can't promise you will get results such as this but it just goes to show what can happen when you know what you're doing on the dance floor.

 

[synergy1]

I know a few guys who could tear it up in salsa - their background is south american so they have done this for a long time. Its an art. I decided to tag along a few years ago to the intro class down in Boston. First I'll say its very difficult to get the rythm with some of the music, but the challenge keeps you from being a bro and holding a beer, and gets you moving and trying new things. Once you get the basic gist of it, you can start to have fun and women will actually come up to you and dance. If theres something there, keep dancing, if not its really no hard feelings and you had a great dance. The people there generally seemed to have a better attitude on life too.

All in all I'd recommend it. If I was closer to the Boston venue, I think i'd make a weekly thing of it to try out the intro classes. It seems like its 1000X better than the bro bars where everyone is pumping fists and women are out just to shoot guys down.