Lift Off!: Chronicles of Development

[Young Rocketship]

I'm at my limit.
I can't go on living like this.

Lift Off


First some background.
At the time of writing this, I am a college freshman. Up until recent years, my life was plagued by the typical problems of an AFC: debilitating shyness, social awkwardness, lack of athleticism, being unassertive, etc. Any AFC problem you can think of I probably embodied.
However, in recent years, I started to change. I made new friends, became more social, became an athlete, and got into a relationship for the first time. Of course with all of these came new sets of problems but overall things were finally looking up.
And then I graduated and went to college.
Things coasted along well for a short time at the beginning but soon things started falling apart. I felt the difficulties that first semester freshmen faced adjusting to the workload. Consistent lack of sleep, terrible eating habits and relationship troubles contributed to a depressing first semester. The end of the relationship especially fxcked my mind up; I'll probably make a separate thread about that later on down the line.

Anyway, the purpose of this thread is that I'm sick of being an AFC and want to live the life of a Don, to be a person who values himself and others value as well. To act with confidence. To be assertive and never be pushed around by anyone. Etc.

Flaws

I pass up opportunities
I procrastinate
I'm lazy
I don't eat as healthy as I should
Same with exercise
I lack proper discipline and dedication
This sometimes applies to academics as well
I'm an introvert
I'm gullible
I'm not very independent
I'm not as knowledgable about certain topics as I should be
I have anger control issues
I have issues speaking my mind and saying no

There's probably more I'm leaving out but those are the most important points.

Goals

Start an exercise and nutrition routine and stick with it
Become more sociable
Approach and get numbers and dates
Develop better study habits
Develop my skills more through dedicated practice every day
Learn how to network
Get started working toward a new career
Get over my ex
Expand my knowledge
Better my sense of humor
Better my spending habits
Learn how to dance
Learn how to produce music/deejay
Become a more well-rounded person in general

There's probably more but that's all I can think of. To help me reach these lofty goals I intend to do as much research on DJ techniques as possible as well as exercise and nutrition. I'm not a complete AFC anymore. I know that if I can come from where I used to be I can go to where I want to be. I'm determined to change. Nothing will stop me, not even myself.

Thank you for reading. Any assistance/constructive criticism will be appreciated. I intend to update this thread frequently with field reports. I'm determined to go as far as I can and then exceed beyond that.

 

[Young Rocketship]

Man, that took a long time to write lol

 

[Young Rocketship]

Just a thought: I'm not normally this negative of a person. I'm actually a funny, likeable person. It's just that recent events have spurred me to reevaluate my life and the way it has been up to this point. The way I feel now, I never want to feel again in my life so this is the first step in ensuring that.

 

[Young Rocketship]

I really don't know where to start with all this though...lol. I'm just gonna check out the DJ Bible and some archive posts on the forum. Again, any advice is appreciated. Help a newbie out:yes:

 

[Young Rocketship]

Nothing really new to report today. That's probably how it's going to be for these first couple days as I'll spend much of my time doing research on seduction and what not. I'll be leaving to go back to college in a little over a week so that's when the field reports will really pick up. But if I hang with my bros I will make it a priority to try to do things that involve hooking up with females.

Meanwhile, I'm not wasting time with my other goals. I'm going to try to learn some dance moves from youtube and get some books on nutrition and weight lifting.

 

[handle]

Cool flaws list but how bout a strengths one?

You have a lot of goals, which 2-3 are you going to do first? Don't try to be better at everything.

Obviously it's up to you but even if you don't know what to do for exercise I would try to get a membership, go to the gym, and at least do cardio 3 days a week (just run for half an hour, breaks if you need them). I say this because you don't have to think about technique (you might not be confident doing weightlifting stuff if you have no guidance), and exercise generally elevates your mood, helps you sleep better, and gets you more focused. Exercise is what keeps me on track, it really does wonders. Cheers.

 

[Young Rocketship]

Thanks for commenting. A strengths list seems like a good idea, I'll go ahead and throw that in there. My main goals to start with are to get over my ex, develop my social skills and the whole learn to dance thing (but that's just to make things easier when I hit up clubs lol)

As far as exercise goes, I'm in the MMA club at my college plus we have a full size fitness center that I go to for free. But since I'm at home, I mostly doing cardio (running, shadowboxing) and pushups, crunches, planks, jump squats, etc. I eventually wanna start a weightlifting and nutrition program going. I'm really skinny (5ft 7" 140lbs) so my goal would be to gain around 20 lbs.

In other news, I started doing approaches as part of the 2nd Annual Approach Anxiety Competition. The main things I realized I have to work on is eye contact, smile, strong voice and body language. Little tweaks like those I believe will push me a long way.

I did see a fine hb in a parking lot I could have approached but didn't because she was a fair distance away and didn't know how to unawkwardly bridge the distance. I regret that though, I still should have at least tried. Oh well. I'll do more research and try to step my game up :yes:

 

[Young Rocketship]

Personal Strengths

*I'm really funny
*Haven't been with a lot of chicks but I haven't had a bad review in bed lol
*Known as being a nice person/ generally good reputation
*Many girls have told me I'm cute. IMO the only things keeping me from bridging the gap to "fine" is height (I'm 5ft 7") and body (I'm really skinny but I do have some muscle)
*Good sense of style. I don't follow hype trends, rather, I try to create my own unique style. I know how to dress and everything but I'm trying to switch my style up for 2012. Less superhero tees, more v-necks, button ups, you know lol.
*I consider myself a smart person. No type of common sense though :crackup:
*I'm good at drawing. Many females beg me to draw stuff for em but I usually don't out of laziness. I'll probably try to use that to my advantage though.

Really I feel like I have tons of potential, just need some guidance. The only thing holding me back is my inner AFC but I'm determined to become a Don Juan no matter what!:rock:

 

[Young Rocketship]

Not a whole lot to report lately. But I'm going back to college on Friday so things should pick up quite a bit.

I chilled with one of my homegirls the other day. She keeps trying to convince me and my ex to get back together but I don't see it happening anytime soon. Also, she wants to set me up on a blind date with one of her friends back at school (We go to the same college), so that's something to look forward to lol. I'm going shopping again tomorrow so that should be a good opportunity to build some approach experience before I leave my hometown.

Other than that, I haven't been able to go out as much as I want. I haven't wasted time though; I've been working on starting my own comic book and my own production company in general. Like I said before, being back at college should afford me many more opportunities to make field reports.

 

[Absolutely]

I'm pretty much in the same boat as you, Rocketship. My first semester started off excellent, then I sort of got content with the way things were going, and stopped working as hard. Getting mono didn't help ...

Anyway, This semester I've made a huge list of goals for myself, both general and specific things, to keep up the tempo this time around. I would suggest setting some specific goals for yourself, like a simple GPA mark, a weight goal, or a certain number of number closes. General goals are good too, but are pretty objective to your own analysis, which (in my case at least) tends to be biased.

On a side note, I can't wait until I get back to school!

Peace

 

[macallik]

Both handle and Absolutely gave you spot on advice btw. The key to sticking to your goals is to make them specific and attainable, even if you have to break them down to multiple steps. Also, staying positive (ie listing your strengths.

Good luck, and keep us updated when you return to college

 

[Young Rocketship]

Thanks guys. I'm finally going back to college later today. I admit I've had some opportunities to approach while I've been home but have mostly missed out due to approach anxiety. Not gonna let that stop me though. My goal is to make at least 3 approaches and number closes by next Sunday. It's kind of a weak goal I know but I want to start slow. I'm gonna do some more reading about maintaining a positive attitude because I'm starting to realize a lot of the adversity in self improvement is in the mind. I'll keep you guys posted. Peace

 

[Young Rocketship]

Been a minute since my last post cause I've been busy getting re-acclimated to campus life. However, I'm no slouch either. I surpassed my goal of three approaches. Here are the notable ones.

I'm at one the cafeterias on campus. Just got my food and looking for somewhere to sit. I see this girl I always see around campus sitting by herself so I approach ask if I can sit with her, to which she affirms, and proceed to engage her in conversation. It's kind of hard at the start as she seems to be the shy type but I soon find out she stays in the same dorms I do (all the dorms on campus are co-ed) and we catch a bit of a rhythm. Still lots of pauses in the convo, though they're not that awkward lol. Her friend comes and sits down and introduces herself to me right off the bat. She's alot more talkative so it's easier to converse with her. We joke around about how she carries tuppaware in her purse to take food with her and soon they leave. I chickened out on the number close but I know I'll see them again soon so it's not too bad. A few friends of mine sitting a few tables away see the whole thing and commend me on how "smooth" I was lol.

Another day. After a morning class I get some food. I see a pretty girl sitting in a chair and I resolve to approach her. I sit down and start to eat my food when I see another pretty girl sitting right behind me. I tell her I hate eating alone and ask to eat with her, which she replies yes. Since she was sitting and studying earlier, I start up a convo about that which leads to us talking about campus, classes, her brother, her race (she's some type of Latina I can't remember what country lol), etc. She eventually has to leave to go to class. I chicken out on the number close again, which I really regret cause I feel like I really could have got it. On the bright side, I'll probably see her again so I can try again.

I'm at MMA practice and, rather unexpectedly, this pretty good looking(HB7) girl comes in saying she wants to learn to fight lol. My homie and I help explain things to her while practice is going on but it doesn't stop her from badly breaking a nail while attempting to spar with someone. I walk her to the little clinic in the fitness center and am about to leave with my bud when I realize I should go in for the number. He's cool about it, tells me I got 10 min to bag it. I go wait for her outside the little clinic area and she finally comes out. We talk for a bit about what they told her to do, I'm acting like I was worried about her and stuff and tell her to give me her number so I can tell her more about fighting lol. She agrees, I text her so she has mine and she says she saved it. I walk out the fitness center feeling triumphant lol.

I tryed to text her about 2 days after that seeing if she wanted to chill during the weekend but I didn't get a response. Oh well, the experience was worth it.

The next day after the above, I was walking to the bookstore off campus in search of a specific textbook. While I'm walking I notice HB6 in front of me. She's not really my type but I decided to go in anyway.

Me: "You on your way to get books too?"
HB6: *Turns around with a smile* "Yeah!"

We small talk for a short bit about her major, classes, etc. but it turns out we're headed to two different bookstores and we part ways. About 20 min later after I get my books I'm back at the crosswalk and I she comes up next to me again, obviously wanting to talk.

Me:"Did you get all your books?"
HB6: "Yeah, you?"
Me:"Yeah"

We talk some more about classes and majors.

HB6: "I wanna be either a nurse or a wedding counselor"
Me: "Those are two very different things. What makes you wanna be those?"
HB6: "Well a lot of my friends come to me for relationship advice so I feel like that would be good to go into"
Me: "Well you seem like a person who's easy to relate to" *smiles, insert kino
HB6: *responds well

She's going to the University Store so I just flat out tell her to give me her number and she does it. We text a little later that day. She asks me if I'm a Christian to which I respond no and she proceeds to encourage me to join her little Christian group anyway. I like how she seemed cool about my lack of faith so I might chill with her and her friends sometime, though I did tell her I was more interested in her. She seems receptive to everything I say. She's always responding with smiley faces and stuff lol. Our busy schedules have kept us from hanging out this weekend but I'll make sure we do sometime this week. Even if she doesn't put out, she might still have her uses as a friend.

Other than that, I got a number from this girl I'm cool with and want to fxck. She's one of the residence leaders at my dorm but she seems receptive to me. Last semester, right before break, she showed me her dorm room (which she has to herself) and walked me to mine so I'll try to work some magic here as well.

In my opinion, I need to build up my skills in the basics (strong body language, voice, eye contact, kino) while working to not come off as a nice guy/friend to girls in the beginning of our interactions. Most importantly, I have to work on keeping conversations flowing. There's more to post, but I'll save it for when I don't have class in the morning lol. As usual, constructive criticism is appreciated. Any links to conversation technique would be appreciated.:yes:

 

[Young Rocketship]

In an 8am lab class. This girl (HB7) is doing her work. I tell her to wait outside for me after lab. She gives me this funky look and asks why, to which I respond, "because I want to talk to you." I finish my work and go outside to actually find her waiting for me. I say something like, "Hey I think you're cute. If you're not talking to someone you should talk to me, etc." She responds that she has a bf and I just smile and tell her to take care until next lab. Looking back, my game was kind of week but I did a good job in going after something I wanted.

I know I'm making slow progress in my goals but I want more success. So I'm resolving to step up my game in approaching by going out (clubs, parties, etc.), doing more day approaches, and being more aggressive in my style of approach. I catch myself passing up good approaches and I don't wanna continue making that mistake. No matter what, I'm still as determined as ever!

 

[Young Rocketship]

Lots to report this time around!

Ok so there's this girl (HB7) in my English class I'm sort of cool with. Worked with her and another person in a group on an assignment so we're on speaking terms. I go into class and the tables are arranged differently so I sit by her and I start up a quick convo about something. Don't ask me what, I'm terrible with remembering conversations to post on here but I do know I had her laughing in a matter of minutes. Class starts and the whole class period we're just reading chapters out our textbooks, in other words, super boring stuff. I start drawing to pass the time and I notice she looks at my drawings and mimics my behavior. First IOI. As class progresses I make a funny drawing about how boring it is and pass it to her to which she laughs. Class lets out (finally!) and we walk together talking about it. I make some jokes about class and the professor to which she responds warmly then ask her what she's about to do. She replies "nothing" so I invite her to eat with me and she agrees.

We're at the cafeteria, which she oddly enough, hardly ever comes to so I recommend the pasta to her. While we're waiting to place our order I spot a cute chick (HB7-8) and compliment her on her pants to which she laughs and says thank you. I didn't go any further with her because the other girl was too close by. I wander off to get a drink and encounter an HB5. I engage in light convo with her about being an arts major and leave without going for a number because she wasn't my type. While in line to receive my food, I chat with an HB7 about her I <3 NY shirt before she gets her food and leaves. The above two encounters you can read about more in depth in my post in the Approach Anxiety challenge.

I sit with my original HB7 that I came there with and we talk about a range of things, most of which I don't remember word for word(sorry lol). It was simple stuff, like her hobbies and stuff. She's into fashion design so it's mostly us talking about that. I did make some jokes to which she responded well and she was pretty funny herself. We seemed to have a good natural chemistry with each other so it was easy to find stuff to talk about.

Afterwards we headed back to our dorms (which happen to be across the street from each other) but not before I asked her to see a movie with me the next day at the school theater, which she said yes to.

The next day, I met with a homie to eat. Spotted some fine girls but chickened out on the approach. Basically just chilled with a female friend (relationship strictly platonic) until it was time to see the movie with old girl from the day before. She met me there, I told her she looked nice and she said thanks as we walked in. I let her pick the spot where we sat and we talked for a bit before the movie started. It was a scary movie so I joked with her about how I was gonna bury my face in her shoulder but she replied that was her job lol. Anyway as we get into the movie she does just that and eventually she lays her head on my shoulder and I have my arm around her for most of the movie.

Afterwards we check out some frats and sororities doing some time of step thing before I walk her to her dorm, arm around her for most of the time. I invite her to my dorm but she plans to go out with her friends that night. I hug her goodbye when I drop her off at her dorm and head home. There's another movie playing at the school theater this weekend so I'll definitely try to repeat this date with her there.