Mr.Positive said:
This point really struck out to me, and I think you are very correct about this.
It is true...but not for ALL women. We should be careful about making generalizations.
However, it IS true for MOST women.
And for most MEN as well...only their type of "fantasy" is a slightly different flavor. Men all want to be heroes...many judge the value of their lives on their caliber of "service"...some to their wife and kids, some to their jobs, some to other ends. We all want to be someone's superhero.
Don't get me wrong...service to a noble cause is nothing to turn one's nose up at. The thing is that men are so bent on service that sometimes they'll hitch themselves up to ANY cart, even one that's been stuck in a rut forever and will just pull them down with it.
Society teaches us that WHAT we serve isn't important...just get out there and serve SOMETHING. If you can't think of anything right now, find a woman to marry and start breeding. Otherwise, you're not "with the program".
I recently got popped for a DUI and I'm in these classes for "addiction counseling"...and the guys in there are just awful. SALIENT examples of what I'm talking about. I know one guy in particular...he is in custody battles with ONE psycho b!tch for his kid and at the same time is ALREADY shacked up with ANOTHER psycho b!tch who cheated on him and has a kid by another man.
WHY would you throw yourself into that kind of situation? You'd think you would LEARN after the first one to take the second one a bit slow.
But no, men dive HEADFIRST into these bad situations, as if by suffering, it proves their worth. They've been indoctrinated that to serve and suffer makes them more of a man...if they're not battling strife, they don't feel COMPLETE.
Oh, they WANT out. But then they hear all this crap, spewed by women and by a media that doesn't know where NOT to stick its nose. "Oh, relationships are hard work! You have to sacrifice! You have to compromise! You have to WORK to make things work out!"
We're being sold out by our own society, taught by our fathers and our brothers to try to find meaning in suffering.
We sacrifice OURSELVES to low-quality women. If men didn't do this, women would SUFFER for being as lackluster as they are and they would strive to "do better". But because men are taught to SERVE and SAVE these low-quality women, to take the suffering on themselves instead of letting the women experience it firsthand, the women continue to degrade and the men continue to suffer.
If you are "suffering through a relationship", you are not only hurting yourself. You're hurting the WOMAN by ENABLING her to continue to float through life aimlessly and never learn to think for herself.
I've dated several women who have tried to strong-arm me into a relationship, but those women typically have something wrong with them...and I understand that me getting involved with them and allowing them to continue being f*cktards with MORAL support is the LAST thing they need in their lives.
If that means I stay single for years until I find a woman that I deem appropriate for MY life, then so be it.
If that means I stay single FOREVER, then so be it.
Again, that doesn't mean that every woman who isn't that "special someone" is worthless to me. Some make good friends, but aren't qualified to be good lovers. Some are great sex, but you can't count on them for crap. Some make great companions for activities, but you don't really connect with them on that deep level...and others you will share a deep philosophical connection with, but when you want to go DO stuff, the will bore the sh!t out of you.
Don't expect EVERY woman to be EVERYTHING you need. Most are not fit to be objects of devotion. Many have potential, but if you enable them to live without realizing it, you're not HELPING them, you're holding them down.
Let go of the idea that women are abstractly and ultimately important. Then you can start to look at them for what they CAN offer you.
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This is one of the reasons the "Mature Man" concept ticks me off. "Mature" in modern society is what we call a "shaming word". If you want to stay single until you find the right woman, instead of settling down and breed in your 20s and 30s, you're considered to not be "mature". If you have a healthy sex drive and want to hook up with many women, you're not "mature".
You may as well replace that with ANY "shaming word/phrase". The classic, "afraid of commitment" is another one. I'm not afraid of commitment. I'm afraid of commitment to an imminent disaster, to some random chick who isn't worth a damn to me and vice-versa.
Be careful when you hear people use phrases like, "any DECENT man" or "the MATURE thing to do" or "it's COMMON SENSE to".
Really take a second and evaluate what the person is saying...is it really what YOU would consider decent or mature or common-sense? Or are they just USING that phrase in the absence of any real objective argument or moral authority to try to manipulate your attitudes and behaviors?
The idea that a "mature man" has different romantic problems than a high-schooler or a college-age student facilitates the continuation of the savior/service role of man and the absolution/objectification of women.
The "game" is only different at an older age because we ALLOW it to be. All women still respond the same. Every "mature" adult yearns to be young again, because it's only in adulthood that we have both the capacity for conscious thought AND the monetary means to finally have the kind of FUN that we want in life.
A woman, be she club-slvt, girlfriend, or wife, should be PART of that fun, part of that experience. Not something you set aside that experience for as a SERVICE/SACRIFICE.
And if you can't find one who works with you...F*CK 'EM! F*CK EM ALL!
