Yep, people change man.
I had a group of buddies who I used to hang out with when I was in my early 20s. You know, the age where you are really social active and usually have a lot more time on your hands? We were all pretty immature, and sometimes we'd get on each other nerves, but we were still buds.
Anyway, one guy in this group I was particularly close with. I moved an hour away and probably didn't see him much over the next 8 years. He got married at some point, I never got an invite to the wedding, which didn't surprise me since we were pretty out of touch. Some years later, he gets my new number from my parents, and gives me one of those really annoying "narcissistic" phone calls you get from friends sometimes, updating on all that had gone on is his life, and asking very little about mine.
Evidently, he'd gotten divorced, went through some rough times, etc. At some level, I felt the phone was him just calling because he was proud of himself for bouncing back from a bad situation, that I never even knew about, and so I couldn't fully appreciate it.
The one thing that really struck me though, is how he had not changed at all. And I don't mean that in a good way. He still was still finding humor in a lot of childish jokes, still reacted to situations he'd faced with that emotionally immature anger that we often did when we were younger, etc. I was really just struck with the impression that he hadn't grown up at all.
It was actually nice to hear from him at the time. None of the stuff I am mentioning here in this post really hit me until after the phone call. I am not sure if this was because I was hanging with a more educated crowd (he didn't go to college, not that I ever judged him for that), or if I grew up a little and he just stood still (and it's not like am an extremely mature guy, I still like to go out and act like an ass). But it was just really different, and I really started to wonder if we were even compatible as friends anymore.
Weird that this was a guy I spent hanging out with non-stop from like ages of 14-24 or so-could grow this far apart.
Needless to say, we exchanged the "we should get together sometime" pleasantries, and not only did we not get together, I never heard from him again (that phone call was about 5 years ago now, maybe 6).
So at this point-not to sound cold hearted- but I don't think I would even be interested in hearing the details of his life or getting together. If us talking wasn't enough to motivate either of us to follow up and get together after not having talked in 7-8 years, I just fail to see the point in it now that another 5 has passed.
