perseverance said:
You want a girl back who cheated on you?
That's understandable, you clearly are really into this girl, you've invested a lot of time, effort, emotion and money into this girl. How does she repay you? She repays you by cheating on you.
You are worth so much more than this, you are worth a decent girl, these girls do exist, but they are rare, but seriously never, ever go out with someone who has disrepected you and cheating on someone is the worst disrespect of all.
This girl isn't worthy of you, you know it, I know it, the entire forum knows it. So save yourself the drama, the heart ache and the depression and stay well away. Those who play with fire will get burned by it. Remember that!
I appreciate it, sir. People mistakenly think that I was a "push-over" on this forum because I cared about her. If you truly love a girl, and she is on rock bottom, you don't tell her things that will blatantly upset it - you try your hardest to love and support them. Unfortunately, those who are similar to my ex in bad situations will not be introspective and place blame on the relationship as causing the downfall in their personal lives.
It's quite unfortunate, and is the root of why this all bothers me. Sure, she never got over her first person - I can honestly understand that, but the texting him behind my back out of her inability to recognize the root cause for her problems frustrates me. I feel "cheated" on the relationship because it wasn't me causing the end.
And, to clarify, I did disagree with her when necessary, but she wanted no part in hearing my disagreement. She felt she was always right to a fault. So, if any of ya'll wish to say I had no backbone, trust me, I did, and I was a "bad boy" in that I stood my ground many times.
I only wish to contact her because between she and I, I was the logical one. It'll take her years to realize what she did to lead to our downfall. Hell, her friends and family love me. In fact, after the breakup my ex said nothing bad against me whatsoever to her friends (confirmed fact). I only wish to tell her that I am sorry for snooping, and that I recognized where we could have done differently - not moving in together being the primary reason. I want to tell her that I've learned a lot, and wish she could share the experiences I've been part of the past few months ever since we first moved in together.
It's fruitless though. Even if I did send something I won't get a response. She's making me the enemy as to displace guilt of her own actions onto someone else - she doesn't like accountability. She's still friends with that ex and I don't doubt she's trying to catch up with him, even though she can't date him because her family and friends hate him (none of them know what she did).
This forum is quick to judge me as someone with no backbone, a loser, a chump - nah, I'm not, nobody in real life thinks that. I just was head over heels for her, she the same to me, and felt cheated out of an amazing relationship due to the unfortunate circumstances and reactions we were in. I made mistakes, and damn did I learn, but they were petty in the grand scheme of things. I should have focused more on myself in her hard times, encouraged her sooner to be free and find herself, etc. Though I never held her back, she felt that way - and maybe I could have been more clear? If I would've developed my social life first and showed it to her here maybe she would have been more at ease instead of longing for her college days (which were with me, too)? Unfortunately, I put a lot of worthless blame on me when, if reversed, I would never put blame or lose feelings for my own ****ty situation.