Lessons learned this year.

[skip2mylou781]

Luke....why do u say things such as "ive had some success" when u havent even kissed a girl???? WTF IS SUCCESS TO YOU??????


by the way, sailor outfit = faggot so wtf are u talkinga bout??

 

[Delta]

the thing about 3 lines of email and no more is GOLD. email is HORRIBLE and can just ruin things because it is a HARD RECORD of what you said when you were pissed. and if she doesn't erase it, she will always have that against you.

especially when it's negative, phone or in person.

------------------------------------------------------------------

i don't agree that being a robot is bad.

there's an article in MAKE magazine about how people screw up in blackjack and gambling in general because they follow their feelings. the feelings causes them to chases "streaks" and it kills.

instead, if they followed plans determined by stats, they would do ok.

can be the same thing with women - especially for afcs - afcs can be deterred by day to day (or minute to minute) fluctuations in how they feel about something.... they might stay at home for weeks because they just ain't feelin' it or they're depressed or etc.

but if they WERE MORE LIKE A ROBOT and just followed a program (and not chase streaks [bad ones in this case]), they might be better off.

------------------------------------------------------------

finally, if you're instincts are BAD - rules are better than your instincts.

delta

 

[Scirolase]

Why do I get the feeling this kid is taking the biscuit out of you?

 

[AlekNovi]

Luke, rules are just fine for this level of your development. And you have my respect for being so persistent.

You will reach a point where you will let go of all rules. But for now it's ok as they're giving you guidelines to follow to provide you with some safety net

btw... online dating success increases TREMENDOUSLY when you have outside succses (i.e. in other venues). So get atleast a few dates out of cold approaches or warm approaches. And build an incredible social life. It's REALLY going to help.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Luke....why do u say things such as "ive had some success" when u havent even kissed a girl???? WTF IS SUCCESS TO YOU??????

Meeting people online to offline. Prior to that, I never meet anyone from the internet, as on a date.

by the way, sailor outfit = faggot so wtf are u talkinga bout??

What are you talking about? Pics work best on internet. A good series of pics is better than a long profile. Even you should know that.

 

[johnnyrem]

There is a strong communication of defeat and anxiety that you bring to your interactions with women. Reading the descriptions of your failures is like watching a train wreck in slow motion, and I bet that's how you feel about it-like there's so much you must learn before you are successful with women.

Live in the moment and analyze your actions before or while you are doing them, not retrospectively. I don't think you need anyone to tell you that sending obsessive/angry emails destroys any chance you have with women.

You know this. Yet you do it anyway. It's that defeatist thing again.

Make all the little bullshyt rules you want, but you're avoiding the real issue and you know it. Your persistent avoidance of the obvious makes your posts more of an exercise in trollery than a real attempt at self improvement.

If I can see this from reading some of your posts, women can smell it in your body language a mile away, and in your conversation before you can complete a single sentence. And yet you think making little "rules" after your unsuccessful interactions with women will solve the problem?

More self delusion. Focus on the problem, rather than wallow in your defeats.

 

[skip2mylou781]

luke.....no sailor outfits, good pics YES, but a pic in a sailor outfit won't attract women, it'll attract men

 

[Luke Skywalker]

There is a strong communication of defeat and anxiety that you bring to your interactions with women. Reading the descriptions of your failures is like watching a train wreck in slow motion, and I bet that's how you feel about it-like there's so much you must learn before you are successful with women.

Live in the moment and analyze your actions before or while you are doing them, not retrospectively. I don't think you need anyone to tell you that sending obsessive/angry emails destroys any chance you have with women.


You know this. Yet you do it anyway. It's that defeatist thing again.

No. With the upgraded rules - it is not done again since the rules cover email communication. The point is some lesson is learned, a standard is incremented, and the same mistakes cant happen again.

Make all the little bullshyt rules you want, but you're avoiding the real issue and you know it. Your persistent avoidance of the obvious makes your posts more of an exercise in trollery than a real attempt at self improvement.

I think your post is an exercise of trollery. I've learned something, and am basically changing a future course the the way I do things in a very basic way. You are not offering any useful advice to this discussion.

If I can see this from reading some of your posts, women can smell it in your body language a mile away, and in your conversation before you can complete a single sentence. And yet you think making little "rules" after your unsuccessful interactions with women will solve the problem?

Rules are made only on two dates - October 25th, and February 3rd, not after every interaction. On February 3rd - with these basical rules, lets see where it goes. Judgements can allow viewing porn or stuff like that so I have further incentives to improve. If I have no luck with women, then I view porn, or some other stuff like adult personals or escort hunting, etc... If I feel this 'I haven't kissed or fvcked anyone' is really screwing my game, then there is that option too.

More self delusion. Focus on the problem, rather than wallow in your defeats.

Ok, ok, there is this girl at my office who is being nice to me, complimenting my haircut, and giving some positve signals and I haven't made a move. I'm a bit shy and just seem to be focusing on my career or work at hand. I feel funny to ask her out for coffee or dinner, but feel shy to do anything.

I'm thinking of saying "I'm going out for lunch, would you like to join me?" or something to that effect - casual, not too much of a 'do you want to go out with me - puppy dog' style.

 

[skip2mylou781]

maybe........you should broaden your horizons?

If i only went for indian women, id also never get laid!

indian women want indian men, I don't know if you knew that

 

[BingoBango]

Some guys are winners, some guys are losers.

 

[johnnyrem]

Nah. You still don't get it. You missed some basic human interaction skills when you were two.

That's why you do dumb things like pop off angry emails and accusations, then act surprised when women take it negatively. Hell, anyone would take that negatively, not just women. You expect her to hang around when you go ballistic and obsessive? What happened to the basic human knowledge you should have that affirms that people don't enjoy the company of pissed, depressed or desperate people? You really didn't ask a girl how many guys she's slept with on a first date, did you? Wait, I guess I can believe that. That's consonant with the rest of your persona, which clearly shows you missed the lessons of life and it's coming out in your interactions with women.

Your expectations are so out of line with reality and basic human social conditioning that the only conclusion I can draw is that you've been living your life without meaningful contact with anyone.

Your cause/effect observations are also weirdly skewed. You call yourself handsome, yet you're not drawing the logical conclusion that your behavior and attitude is keeping you dateless/sexless. What else could it be?

Another problem is that you think that once you've seen something, you have it down, and you can be ready the next time. Really, that's not the lesson you should be learning in the time you spend with women. Most of this stuff is variations on a theme, which is that women are socially interacting with you to see your outlook on life. If that outlook doesn't change then you can make all the rules and codicils you want and you'll still be jacking off to porn.

Your outlook sucks, and you expect to fail. Don't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, and lose the "I'm gonna fail if it kills me" attitude.

Women can sense when you're not having fun anymore and trying way too hard. That, more than anything else, is killing your chances with women.

Your undertone of grim obsession with the failures you've experienced makes efforts to prop you up wearisome. And that's what makes you a troll. I bet you're the life of the party, wherever you are, with the attitude you've got.

That's as specific as you need. The real question, then, is what are you going to do to change what matters?

Good luck doing things your way, when it clearly isn't working. I need say no more.

 

[Bvbidd]

The guy obviously has some sort of mental disability.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Nah. You still don't get it. You missed some basic human interaction skills when you were two.

That's why you do dumb things like pop off angry emails and accusations, then act surprised when women take it negatively. Hell, anyone would take that negatively, not just women. You expect her to hang around when you go ballistic and obsessive? What happened to the basic human knowledge you should have that affirms that people don't enjoy the company of pissed, depressed or desperate people?

Whatever. That's finished. That 'type' of mistake is outlawed.

Your expectations are so out of line with reality and basic human social conditioning that the only conclusion I can draw is that you've been living your life without meaningful contact with anyone.

Which rules do you not agree with -wtf are you talking about?

Your cause/effect observations are also weirdly skewed. You call yourself handsome, yet you're not drawing the logical conclusion that your behavior and attitude is keeping you dateless/sexless. What else could it be?

Which is the basis of the new rules here, again you are agreeing with the lesssons I"ve learned, so what's your point, you want attention or something?

Another problem is that you think that once you've seen something, you have it down, and you can be ready the next time. Really, that's not the lesson you should be learning in the time you spend with women. Most of this stuff is variations on a theme, which is that women are socially interacting with you to see your outlook on life. If that outlook doesn't change then you can make all the rules and codicils you want and you'll still be jacking off to porn.

Your outlook sucks, and you expect to fail. Don't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, and lose the "I'm gonna fail if it kills me" attitude.

And I know why I have failed in specific cases, so the causes dont repeat themselves, and your point?

Women can sense when you're not having fun anymore and trying way too hard. That, more than anything else, is killing your chances with women.

Your undertone of grim obsession with the failures you've experienced makes efforts to prop you up wearisome. And that's what makes you a troll. I bet you're the life of the party, wherever you are, with the attitude you've got.

There is no grim obession with failure, if there were lessons learned here and posted. What is trollish is how people want attention and tend to jump on the bandwagon of what I consider to be legitimate points that are posted in the start of this thread.

If you dont agree with a particular rule or lesson - then state that. Each step is one less step to worry about - so specific causes of a failure cant repeat itself again.

That's as specific as you need. The real question, then, is what are you going to do to change what matters?

Good luck doing things your way, when it clearly isn't working. I need say no more.

And what do you think matters?

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Some guys are winners, some guys are losers.

You can say that again.

 

[skip2mylou781]

i noticed something that isnt the WHOLE reason you cant get a girl, but it is definitely PART of the reason

you're not funny
you're not witty
and most likely you are not a fun date

theres a part of your problem you really REALLY need to work on!

 

[johnnyrem]

"What do I think matters?"

For chrissake, man, didn't you read the post? Didn't I spell it out clearly?

Jesus.

Luke, you are getting the results you deserve.

Darth Vader ain't your "daddy". Your depressive attitude is. Multiple posts have stated you are focusing on the wrong thing, and your approach is wrong. You stubbornly persist on making mistake after mistake.

You wish to argue, but really, what are you arguing about except your journey toward repeated failure? You are enjoying this way too much.

I would suggest relationship counseling from a professional. There is too much here for the members of a dating website to fix.

Ultimately, you've got to realize that no one can care that much about your failures as they've got their own lives to lead. Especially the women you're trying to meet. If you cannot fix the obvious, then that is your burden to deal with as best you can.

I am thankful I do not have your outlook on life or dating.

I leave you to wallow in your dysfunctional misery.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

"What do I think matters?"

For chrissake, man, didn't you read the post? Didn't I spell it out clearly?

Jesus.

That's all you needed to say. Jesus is all that matters.

Wow, I'm being reproved by a non-Christian, God will use anyone even if they dont even know it to answer the obvious.

Luke, you are getting the results you deserve.

Darth Vader ain't your "daddy". Your depressive attitude is. Multiple posts have stated you are focusing on the wrong thing, and your approach is wrong. You stubbornly persist on making mistake after mistake.

We are only talking about three girls here you know and the meetings occurred during the summer and the longest friendship seemed to last up to September when I sent a bunch of emails in anger because she wrote something to the effect of losing her virginity with another guy that dumped her and I just lost it when I read that, because she always gave me BS and gave me an impression she was not serious with any other guys.

It could have been handled differently, but hey, some guys can get really angry when a girl disrespects them and cheats on them. So, sure, I need anger management with cheats.

The other girl got offended when I asked "how many guys did you sleep with?", has nothing to do with attitude, I just asked an innoscent question because she told me earlier she was a non-virgin, and I was just curious to ask. I didn't say I was looking for a gf. New rule made not to ask that question.

The last girl in question - just blew up at her with a few e-bombs - again, the three sentence rule would have prevented that or the cell phone rule. Again, the rules above will insure these types of mistakes do not occur again, or at least people are not nuked off.

You wish to argue, but really, what are you arguing about except your journey toward repeated failure? You are enjoying this way too much.

I really do not understand what you are trying to say.

I would suggest relationship counseling from a professional. There is too much here for the members of a dating website to fix.

I may need counseling if I'm putting too much attention on your posts, and thus, this is my last reply.

Ultimately, you've got to realize that no one can care that much about your failures as they've got their own lives to lead. Especially the women you're trying to meet. If you cannot fix the obvious, then that is your burden to deal with as best you can.

Sure. So, what failures are we talking about - this is not a thread about failure, it's a thread about lessons that cant be repeated again if I'm going to allow myself to view porn or whatever again in the future - so the bar is higher to get a porn-pass - this is to ensure that no porn-addiction is skewing results - have the addiction on check I tell you.

 

[skip2mylou781]

LUKE LUKE LUKE!!!

u cannot ask a girl how many guys shes slept with outta the blue..........before you ask such a question, u need to be vibing, cuddling, kissing, and talking about sex - so her getting pissed at u was justified because you pulled that question outta NOWHERE!

DUDE.......u say a girl cheated on you when she was with another guy???

how is it cheating? if you and hever never kissed or cuddled for months, please tell me WHY IS IT CHEATING IN YOUR MIND?

 

[Call_Me_Daddy]

edit:

Forget I ever said anything.

 

[Call_Me_Daddy]

edit:

Forget I ever said anything.