Entering the territory of the LTR, exciting isn't it?
This is where it gets EXTRA hard to keep that little devil inside of us from coming back out.
Why? As a DJ out in the world, we are going after women left right and center. Stepping into an LTR however, brings us into a comfort zone. The Comfort zone is where the AFC in us all loves to try to take control again. Just remember because your in an LTR and you've opened up to a girl, and let down your guard, doesn't mean you can't still control your habits.
Your feeling great, you think "Hey maybe if I ease up now the rules won't apply" but as you go, you realise there's been a change going on inside.
You think to yourself "I know I should have done X when I should have done Y, but why didn't I?".
You come to the realisation. "OH SH*T! I let myself go! Just like a person trying to lose weight, I SHED my AFC Pounds, but then I got too comfortable stopped working out, and GAINED IT ALL BACK! I know this is a lifestyle, but I didn't realise I changed my lifestyle again when I entered into this LTR! I didn't compensate to help keep me in shape!" (This is why in LTR's Experiance is the best teacher, since you can know what to expect but you more than likely won't see it coming without having been through the experiance before).
You take a moment to think. Then you say "Hey I know I can get back into this again, but What do I do with the Relationship, HOW do I fix it, what can I do now? I MISS HER"
A voice says "NONSENSE! Your Dwelling on the past, wasn't this 'break' of yours meant for you to grab a hold of yourself? Remember, even though you may MISS her, she is NOT the only woman in the world. REMEMBER! This is your wake up call, and GUT check, CAN you get back in the saddle, CAN you get a hold of yourself? YES you can!"
You wonder "Well I know I can do that, and I COULD move on, but WHAT can I do about the relationship?"
The voice says "YOU wanted a break to start over a-new? YOU GOT THIS CHANCE! What you mean by Starting over A-New however, is all up to you."
You find yourself facing the choices "Do I continue in the relationship as I have, and watch it fade from exsistance? Maybe I really COULD Start Over, and This time I'll follow my Instincts, instead of nuturing my inner AFC."
Then you realise there's yet another choice! However maybe not one you are willing to take yet. "What is this choice, self?" you yell out hoping to reassure yourself your wrong.
"The Choice is..." You hope he isn't going to say what you don't want. "...You START over as this relationship may have too much of yourself in it for you to continue in the way YOU WANT to behave and live, but rather may make you continue in the way You WERE, and were COMFORTABLE in living. I think you know if you can continue with or without reverting, and I think that is why your in so much pain and Conflict with yourself, even now. You know what choice you HAVE to make, as I can't make it for you, I'm just a voice."
Your eyes closed, you remember an old saying "The price of peace is eternal vigilance" Or in this case, the price of keeping your AFC from taking over again.
You take a step outside, Breath the fresh air, and knowing what your decision is, you make your choice.
--It's just like when you lose weight, it's a change in lifestyle, not just a diet, or some excersize equipment. You add something into your lifestyle you better compensate if you wanna keep things flying right, you can't let yourself go since you found what you may have been looking for.
It's all about choice man, it's not a set of tricks, it's not a set of rules, it's not a religion, and not just a mindset. It's a lifestyle, it's a way of life, it's how we live. You may be hurting now, but you have to try to keep with YOUR lifestyle, not moulding it around her lifestyle.
Keep your head on straight, try to get a clear mind, and you know what you gotta do, because neither I, or anyone else on this board can tell you what to do.
