learnt a valuable lesson today, help me break down exactly what happened please?

[big weezy]

ok so for being heavily flamed for this: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=200004

i've learnt a valuable lesson today but still confused as to what happened exactly.. she never contacted me in the end and i caved in i texted her this evening:
me: when you leaving for New York?
(no reply she always replies straight away)
i assume she's p1ssed cos i didnt return her calls from last week so i tried using one of the jokes given to me by one of you guys. after an hour and half
me: haha are u still upset cos i couldnt take yoru calls last week? i told u i dont have a gf, (actually i have several but i had to get rid of a few cos they're rubbish at tennis! ) so there's no need to be jealous. Take care.
she responds straight away: i have a boyfriend already now no reason to be jealous
(i was pretty p1ssed off about this cos it's only been 1 week, so in turn i'm acting jealous which may have come across in my next text)
me: Congrats. that was quick, all in 1 week, good for you. See ya.

i couldn't really hide my annoyance or jealousy so was being sarcastic tryna make her feel slvtty after giving me the whole speech last week about being single at dinner.. BUT what i've learned which one of you guys rightly pointed out was that when she went to dinner with me it was probably because her first option bailed on her and wanted me to take her out as an ego boost.. tbh all of this chronologically made sense.. the 1st time we met she seemed excited and gave me her number.. couple days later she wasn't and when we met she didn't seem keen at all (there was already another guy in the picture at that time ahead of me), you guys said she was DTF, but really it was a different guy she liked much more.. fast forward to the call 2 days later where she was getting her nails and hair done (who for?). she obviously was doing this for a date that night not to see her friends.. fast forward to the monday when i said to meet up she said she was busy and couldnt.. (could have met the guy again) then the next day she contacts me out of the blue to meet up and she wouldn't let me touch her at all.. whereas week before she did (she wouldn't let me touch her cos she was already involved with another guy but wasn't official) and her whole speech about being single was BS.. then the back n forth text that ensued that night saying she wouldn't let me kiss her.. then the next day she calls me twice abruptly and she saying i couldn't talk cos i have a gf. fast forward to today her announcing she has a bf now.

i have only myself to blame for all of this, not her, not him.. but what i need to clarify is, how did you guys know so quickly that there was another guy in the picture who bailed on her?
like what pattern of her behavior suggested this?

i need to walk away much much sooner as soon as there is a sign of disrespect or low interest. i'm really seething now with anger, but i can only blame myself.. i feel led on from the start and despite you guys saying she was DTF i honestly think she was not.. i know you guys say 'if a girl meets a new guy who's better than the one she's currently seeing then she's single, if she's not then she has a bf. if i were to play this all over again i would not have bothered contacting her again after that 1st meeting. maybe she was just using me to make him jealous to up her value to him and make him commit, she could be lying that she has a bf now, but i suspect not. i obviously sound jealous from my very last text, but im more bitter about being led on right at the beginning, i can accept she wasn't interested thereafter.

solution: get more options, if possible.. cos im not behaving as someone who has an abundance of girls, otherwise why would i have contacted her. tough lesson, but one i need to store for the memory bank to draw upon.

 

[yuppaz]

Ya all of that was only an issue because you are lacking in potential options and therefore experience. Just go approach a lot more women you find attractive.

 

[Purefilth]

but what i need to clarify is, how did you guys know so quickly that there was another guy in the picture who bailed on her?
like what pattern of her behavior suggested this?

Theres always someone else in the picture.

You are an option, he is an option, orbiters are options, and girls love to find a use for all of their options.

Move on and get some options of your own and you will care less. (indifference is key)

 

[Greasy Pig]

That sucks OP. I think the last text was ok. It didn't sound too butt-hurt to me but now you go NC.
You've learned a valuable lesson, now heal, be better and remember the signs of low interest this chick gave off so you can recognise them again.
The beauty of this is that you've successfully weeded out an unworthy candidate for your time and affection.
You should feel liberated!

As for many of us guessing there was another guy in the picture, it stems from dealing with women who show high interest and then very suddenly low interest.
Sudden low interest after seemingly positive interactions with her almost always indicates another guy is in the picture.
Flaking, becoming distant, not replying to texts after earlier replying quite quickly.
Just remember, a woman who is passionately interested in you will look to maximise her time with you.
Rollo: "A woman who wants to fvck you, will find a way to fvck you."

It doesn't matter which friends, other guys or girls' night out she has to ditch, she'll do it if she wants to secure your intimacy.
If a woman isn't bending over backwards to make time for you, she isn't interested, move on.
Then, of course, you have to analyse your game and identify areas you might need to improve in order to maximise a woman's interest to fever pitch.

And stick around these forums. You'll learn more than enough to achieve your goals.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

In answer to your question: I don't ever assume a girl with low interest in me has another guy she's trying to see. All I care about is the fact that the low interest exists, which means she's not going to be around for long.

You need to get to a point where your ego isn't butt hurt when you're not able to get a girl to like you. There are billions of girls on this planet, so some of them are bound to not like you, or start out liking you but then change their minds. I've gotten to a place now where, even if I sleep with a girl one night and the next night she's backing off me or showing interest in someone else in front of me, I don't let it bother me - just chalk it up to the game, say "oh, that was interesting" and move on to the next.