LBJF turnaround?

txuclafan

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Backstory: I been friends with this gal 27, I'm 32. Dated for couple months about a year and a half then was LBJF'ed. I got the not "compatible" line. No problem with that. She is very inexperienced= no LTR since college. I dated several gals in between this and managed to procur a nice little FBuddy.

Fast forward to last week: We've been good friends since then and have the same schedules, friends, and careers. We had decided to date exlusively (her idea)wherein the discussion centered on her nervousness about whether we would mess it up.

Last Night: She asked "could we just be friends" after having kissed the previous week and spent almost everyday together=probably the biggest error. I said sure it's been week but told her that we should take a breather and let her figure it out. She said " I dont feel how, I ought to feel." I told her I was dissapointed since she had initiated this and she said she would rather I hated her- but I won't let her lose that guilt so quickly.

Anyways, for those that try to get out of the LBJF zone it is an uphill cllimb, 99% of the time not worth it. Whether or not this "label of BF/GF for her in my situation has overwhelmed her or not" remains to be seen. Our mutual friends(especially the gals) are shocked but I am just laughing it off calling my fbuddy to hang out. Remember it is never what they say it's how they act.
 

Quick

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This isn't the standard LJBF where it happens because she doesn't see you in a sexual way. It sounds like she does want you, but she's scared and has a lot of hangups. When a girl is this skittish, I would force the issue. That's not necessarily the only way to go about it, but I would. I'd make her choose between being with me or not being with me and make it clear she can't go back and forth. Sometimes what girls like that need is to have their options taken away because they're too indecisive. It's often easier for both people that way.
 

txuclafan

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Closed!!!!

Sometimes you let those invalid insecurities creep...Then you focus on overcoming objections and end up balls deep!
 
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