Language of Women

[becker]

Originally posted by I give Up
I asked this girl I liked a lot a few weeks ago out, and the conversation basically went like the following:

ME: "You know, ive gotten to know you a lot this week, and we seem to both like eachother a lot. From what I can tell, you seem to be giving me signals, and quite frankly I'm interested in you. So basically what I am asking is, are you interested in me?"

HER: "Um......I don't know."

ME: "Oh, well, you seem to be giving me signals, so I was wondering why you were showing me signs that you like me."

HER "Just ignore me, Im crazy. I don't know."

It's amazing, I had a girl who gave me similar responses, but to different questions. First of all, I wasn't asking her out, I was just having normal conversation with her. She tended to get nervous and had a hard time putting together coherent sentences around me sometimes, and would speak really fast, get tongue-tied, etc.

Anyways, this girl had a BF, so that's what I thought your situation was. I also agree you were too direct. It's a crime that we can't all just be direct and have things work out like a movie, but I guess that's why they call it fiction.

Some girls that I know say "no" without hesitation, but many times they read into questions that you ask them. Then there are girls who will say "maybe", but to me, maybe always seems to mean "no", because if they wanted to, they'd just say "yes".

bp1974, do you really think that a girl who avoids you necessarily means that she doesn't like you? I've known some extremely shy girls who do a lot of this, because the directness is too much for them to handle.

 

[bp1974]

bp1974, do you really think that a girl who avoids you necessarily means that she doesn't like you? I've known some extremely shy girls who do a lot of this, because the directness is too much for them to handle.

No. When I talked about avoidance I wasn't talking about the girl avoiding you, I was talking about the girl avoiding conflict with you.

I meant that when a girl isn't interested she will more often than not avoid telling you so. Instead, she'll say "um.. i don't know.." etc.

So one of the clearest signals that a girl isn't interested in you is that you feel all confused from her wishy washy answers even though you know you've been pretty clear in asking her out.

If it ain't Yes, it's No.