L-Bomb from the g/f

[Aisujin]

Hey everyone,

I'm new to this board, but I've been an avid reader of Doc Love and Anti-Dump's articles for a couple of years. And I'd like to get your opinion on a situation of mine.

I'm currently in a relationship with a 8-9 girl. We've been dating for about 8 months now, but have been exclusive for 3. I'm proud to say that SHE was the one always asking about "our status" and when were we going to be exclusive. I waited about a month till I finally sat down with her and made it "official".

Recently she dropped the L-bomb on me one night because she said she couldn't hold it in anymore. I found this amusing because she's a gorgeous girl who's used to "having guys confess their feelings about themselves before she does". The fact that I wasn't clingy (emotionally and physicaly) threw her off. As of late, she has been prodding me on how I feel. My response was "stick with me and you'll find out".

Now, I'd like to tell her that I have the same feelings for her some time soon. When and if I should do this is my question to the group. Any other advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I'd suggest that if you do feel the same way, then say so.

If you don't, soon enough, then it will be as if you threw it in her face, and she might start to resent you because you act as if you don't feel the same.

If you DO mean it, say.

Just don't say it all the time

 

[crowes22]

I agree w/ Bad Ass. I think you'd be fine to reciprocate if you really dig her. Just don't be one of those dyckheads that says "I love you" every time he gets off the phone w/ a girl he is dating!

I wouldn't be saying it that often if I was married to the girl. BTW, sounds like you have done a good job w/ this chick.

 

[frivolousz21]

Just don't be one of those dyckheads that says "I love you" every time he gets off the phone w/ a girl he is dating!

haha so im a **** head.

because we say I love you to each other when we get off the phone...


why you moron?

because if one of us dies..Id like the last thing we say to each other to be I love you.


Im glad im not you.

 

[Aisujin]

"because we say I love you to each other when we get off the phone...
why you moron?
because if one of us dies..Id like the last thing we say to each other to be I love you."


You know its funny, I used to think the same way. I still do that w/ my family. And I USED to do that with my ex-girlfriends... but that's the EXACT reason why they are my x-girlfriends. They lost intrest, and I learned my lesson.

Anyways, thanks for the advice guys. My girl is away for the week with her family so I'm not going to do it over the phone. I'd rather wait till she gets back and tell her after a walk or nice dinner.

heh. I guess I should do it soon because she SMS'd me about how she can't wait to hear how I feel about her.

 

[Bible_Belt]

after a walk or nice dinner.

or before bed

 

[frivolousz21]

listen if you really believe they are your X gf's beecause you said I love you to them when you got off the phone...or whenever you say it.


I feel sorry for you...because thats BS...and if sosuave tries telling you a girl who is IN love with you will lose interest because you show her that you are IN Love with her as well....then ur mistaken.

as for the first time..of course do it in person.



being an afc has nothing to do with showing ur emotions...

it has to do with having low self esteem.

a women has to respect, trust and believe in you, and you can do whatever you want.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Originally posted by frivolousz21


a women has to respect, trust and believe in you, and you can do whatever you want.

That's the key, right there. Well put, Frivolous.

 

[Aisujin]

That's a very good point Frivolous. Thanks for the input.

Any creative/romantic suggestions on how to tell her? (I am a romantic when it comes down to it)

 

[frivolousz21]

trhanks..I just dont want the guys here to think they cant be a ROMANTIC or an PASSIONAITE guy because the women will lose interest..when thats just garbage.

the bad boy thing is fine.

but the women want a Man with passion and romance.


dont tell her when she exspects it.

maybe take her to a nice park with a lake and little bridges.

look out at the water..come from behind and talk to her about something off the wall...like sports..

then be silent for a few secs and whisper it in her ear.

thats how I did it.

 

[crowes22]

I was gonna reply here but I smell a flame war coming on, so I'll try to keep my distance.

 

[frivolousz21]

you can post your opinion....I know what I know from expierence....and maybe I am just that fycking pimp I dont have to play games to keep her interested JK!

maybe its been diff for you.

 

[Aisujin]

Ya, I just had a different set of experiences. I still respect Friv's POV thou.

 

[frivolousz21]

of course we all do.

its pretty sad I can reply this fast..

WORK IS BORING TODAY!


but we have to live our lives the way we want to.

but we have to know that things wont go our way always and be prepared for the bad things that can come our way.

I have had women lose interest in me being clingy and needy.


I have had women lose interest in me from being to distant.

I have had women love me from being a charmer and passion man.


remember alot of this depends on the women ur with

 

[comic_relief]

Originally posted by frivolousz21

but we have to live our lives the way we want to.

but we have to know that things wont go our way always and be prepared for the bad things that can come our way.

Holy Hell Frivolousz21, that was amazing posts man. Yes I agree with Friv. on almost everything that he said because all it takes is confidence and a sense of detachment so you won't go on suicide watch if she breaks up with you .

 

[Tazman]

I think people use the term too loosely. You can be in so called "love" one day and out of it next month. Does that mean it was trully love? Then again, I guess everyone has their own ideas and opinions as to what love actually is. I think if you can go through tough times and remain happy (or atleast work at it)together you're pretty close.

 

[CLOONEY]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
I'd suggest that if you do feel the same way, then say so.

If you don't, soon enough, then it will be as if you threw it in her face, and she might start to resent you because you act as if you don't feel the same.

If you DO mean it, say.

Just don't say it all the time

Agree 100%

 

[CLOONEY]

I also agree with frivolousz21 from my own experience. I have had 3 girls in love with me. 1, I never said it back to her (because I didnt feel it) and she stayed in love with me, even several months after I broke up with her.

Another I said it to first, we said it to eachother all the time for years, then broke up because of geographical reasons.

Another, she said it to me first, we say it all the time to eachother still, and she is only growing more and more in love. That is the girl I am currently with.

So, as long as you show them you dont "need" them, show them all the different emotions and signs, as already been discussed numerous times before, you will be fine, saying "i love u" more or less doesnt mean nothing!

That being said, dont become a sap like Anakin Skywalker!

 

[frivolousz21]

yes...exactly Clooney!


needing her because you love her is one thing..its nto a clingy need.

its a need for the ephoria of love..and everyone feels it if they are in love.


being "needy" is having low self worth and no life.


but regardless if a women is in love with u....it would take u to do SERIOUS damage to ruin it

 

[Aisujin]

Skywalker "Padime.....Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"


:crackup:

I lost it when I saw that!

I think I figured out a good way to say it to her. I'll take her rock climbing and when she's decending, and right above the ground I'll stop the rope and whiper it into her ear.