Kinda Confused on how to Advance

[someone800]

Hey,

As some of you may know, I recently got a prom date for this weekend. She's a pretty nice girl-probably not the kind who would go to a club.

Anyways, since I had never really talked to her before I asked her out to prom, I arranged a time for us to go to this school coffee shop thing after school, get something to drink (she went dutch) and basically talk about her for half-an-hour to get to know her more.

It went great. Nothing noticeably wrong happened. However, this is a bit awkward to type, but there was no sexual contact whatsoever. Kinda need that in a relationship?

One of my friends suggested not giving her a hug when I see her (because that would bring me into the "friends zone"), but to give her a hug when she leaves. I walked her to her school activity and it was a walking type of good-bye-it wasn't a stop and say good-bye so there wasn't an opportunity for a hug.

Obviously, I don't want this relationship to sink into the friends zone before it is to late.

Any tips? Thanks.

 

[MCristo]

One of my friends suggested not giving her a hug when I see her (because that would bring me into the "friends zone"), but to give her a hug when she leaves. I walked her to her school activity and it was a walking type of good-bye-it wasn't a stop and say good-bye so there wasn't an opportunity for a hug.

Lol! come on man. You're 17, I'd say you are both past hugging each other. The reason nothing sexual is happening is because you aren't making it happen. Start by kissing her on the lips next time you say goodbye. Isolate her and make out and then it's YOUR job to progress things.

Be a sexual being! Be an animal! Pounce on that ****!

 

[ARrocket]

Lol! come on man. You're 17, I'd say you are both past hugging each other. The reason nothing sexual is happening is because you aren't making it happen. Start by kissing her on the lips next time you say goodbye. Isolate her and make out and then it's YOUR job to progress things.

Be a sexual being! Be an animal! Pounce on that ****!

Pretty much so man....you NEED to have kino.

 

[someone800]

Lol! come on man. You're 17, I'd say you are both past hugging each other. The reason nothing sexual is happening is because you aren't making it happen. Start by kissing her on the lips next time you say goodbye. Isolate her and make out and then it's YOUR job to progress things.

Be a sexual being! Be an animal! Pounce on that ****!

Well, she's a Sophmore and I'm a Junior.

She seems to be a pretty innocent girl...her friend that hooked us up says she's not though.

Wouldn't it be weird to when I see her in class tomorrow go up to and just start making out with her out of the blue (this would also be the first time even touching her)?

Thanks.

 

[LostAndConfused]

Uh yeah.....thats why you escalate. You haven't touched her yet...at all?! Come on man, use some sense. As a safe bet I would be stroking or smelling her hair before you would go for a kiss. And in my opinion I wouldn't start with tongue anyways.

Really, on the first coffee date you SHOULD have been using kino. But its ok that you didn't hook up with her, the last girl I was with I didn't hook up with her on the first date either.

Either way this is good for you because its a learning experience.

 

[someone800]

Uh yeah.....thats why you escalate. You haven't touched her yet...at all?! Come on man, use some sense. As a safe bet I would be stroking or smelling her hair before you would go for a kiss. And in my opinion I wouldn't start with tongue anyways.

Really, on the first coffee date you SHOULD have been using kino. But its ok that you didn't hook up with her, the last girl I was with I didn't hook up with her on the first date either.

Either way this is good for you because its a learning experience.

I know, but the this was also at school as I believe I said. Plus, we were sitting down at a table...can't really initiate kino without awkwardly stretching across the table.

On top of that as far as advances, what should I do? There's tomorrow (in school), no real opportunities Thursday, then several hours on the bus Friday for a school class field-trip thing and then it's Prom.

Any ideas? Thanks again.

 

[LittleBigOne]

Looks to me you worry a lot about the outcome. When doing this you block YOURSELF by hesitation and in the end you will be her nice-guy friend forever.
What do you want? If you don't want to be her friend then you have to take a risk! So on the prom try to isolate her and go in for a kiss. Don't tell you love her or show your feelings, do the action. If she rejects, well that might hurt...for a few days. But, you are 17! After this you are gonna meet so manny other girls! See this as an experience and don't make a huge point of the situation. Relax!

 

[Bible_Belt]

Learn to flirt. Tease her like she is one of your friends' kid sisters. Get her laughing, joke around, playfully and lightly punch her in the arm after a joke. Then seize one of these moments to touch her hair, look into her eyes, and kiss her. Then act like that kiss never happened. Pull away, then later repeat the process again.

 

[faiNt`]

Poke, tease, ect. When you want to kiss her, isolate her and then stare deep into her eyes for little less than 5 seconds or so. She'll know what you want After that just go for it, I'm 100% ****ing sure that when your head starts moving forward you won't be nervous anymore, it'll be fun.

 

[someone800]

Thanks for the answers guys.

Today though, I made the decision that after talking to her or before (whichever had the better opportunity) I would go for a hug.

I was walking with her after a class and she introduced me to a bunch of her friends near a locker area and then because of the short passing, she had to go, so I decided to go for the hug.

I stood, opened my arms, and said, "Alright, bye." expecting her to follow the motion. She kind of had already started walking (smiling-no facial sign of disgust?) and walked away to her locker. I then proceeded to my class mumbling, "Ok then."

Any suggestions based on this? I don't know if it is her personality (my guess is it is) or what.

Also, I should note a couple other things.

One, today at school, I seemed very tired and not that talkative. It was kind of hard to keep an interesting conversation going when we were going to where I met her friends.

Also, after school, I hung out with a friend girl of mine and we went to American Eagle and she helped me get a bunch of new clothes for Spring/Summer. Something I noticed though was I seemed a lot more loose with her. The only thing that currently doesn't seem to fly is hugs and stuff (kino) because as I read somewhere here, she knows me not as a "sexual person." However, I was so loose with her, I did something "unexpected" in the dressing room (she was in there) and basically stripped down to my boxers without really a second thought when I changed and stuff.

I should also note that as far as the tiredness I mentioned earlier goes, I also bought a coffee after school and now I feel more awake.

Basically, something I noticed is that I don't want to **** this "relationship" up with this girl I am going to prom with. I know I am being really cautious and I am supposedly not to, but the thing is I'd probably be more lenient to taking risks if I wasn't going to prom with her (already bought two $25 tickets). I took that "hug" risk today and as you saw, that was almost on the edge.

So, any suggestions? Thanks.

 

[smoothtalker72]

you said she was walking away when you stood there expecting a hug. if she wasnt paying attention you could have called her attention to you with something along the lines of "wait get back here". then you would have had her attention (if she heard you) and would realize you were expecting a hug and since you are going to the prom with her she more than likely would have hugged you

 

[someone800]

Thanks for the reply, however:

Today, on the trip, I was going to sit next to her and talk and stuff but never really managed to do that because she sat with her friends. Otherwise, we got a few bits of casual talk in.

Anyways, I was talking back and forth with her friend who's my friend who hooked me up with her and then she found out and told me what shot me down:

Apparently, she's not allowed to date; she thinks of me as probably a friend, and she is going with me because she doesn't want to "crush" me. :cuss:

WHAT THE ****! EVERYTIME! I must be the most AFC person I know. Obviously, this is a "nice guy" scenario. What do I do now? Prom is tomorrow and we are still going. I already bought mine and her ticket (total $50) and ordered a $20 corsage. Then, there is dinner tomorrow night which will probably cost around $30-$40 for the two of us (I don't want to pay, but people say I should).

This is going to be really weird. What is the DJ way to handle this scenario and still have a blast at prom?

Thanks.