Jelousy is like any other emotion. You can over come it if you try hard enough. If I even feel myself getting jelouse, I just remind myself that my girl is there with ME, she and I both know that so whatever flirting occurs between her and another guys really has no bearing on us, because she's with me. Even if it takes you a while, you can overcome jelousy.
Now if it were my WIFE, That'd be a different story. I think it's very wrong for your wife to be hit on by other guys because you've taken vows and you two should be the only people you have romantic feelings towards. I'd more then expect my wife to be very up front about getting rid of any "suiters" or guys hitting on her.
I'd be very jelouse (and angry for that matter) if someone were hitting on my wife (and she played along) or she was hitting on another guy (there'd be a LONG discussion on the ride home).