Some of us are less man-***** than you are and we do believe in respects when the relationship is exclusive. On the other hand, if it is simply dating, then I guess you're right about the situation, then again, this thread probably won't exist if they're just dating.
Jealously
- Thread starter colonel
- Start date
The talk
Hi guys,
There has been a lot of useful comments posted, I can't say I agree with it all but I asked the question to get all the different views so for that thanks.
I went round last night, I was planning to talk with her straight away. I was in luck she wanted to talk about it. She knew I was pissed of when she told me about the fact that this guy was going to stay over.
I told her, I wasn't comftable with other blokes staying over at her flat, especially ones that had a thing for her. In the ned this bloke didn't stay round she sent him packing because she knew I wasn't that happy about it. She said she had spent the day thinking abour it. She said if it was the other way round she wouldn't be entirely happy about it. She said looking back that if I hadn't had been concerned she would have been a bit worried about how much I cared for you.
Therefore situation resolved, know bloke stays around that flat except me. I am definitely glad we talked about it, I felt much better for it. She is the kind of girl you can talk to if you aren't happy about something, she listens and takes in everything you say.
For those who want my situation clarified, it is a committed exclusive relationship. Not how we planned it. I had been reading this site for a long time before this girl came along and I wasn't planning to rush in. Things have just gone really well.
Cheers again for the advice, I know where to come next time I have concerns.
Hi guys,
There has been a lot of useful comments posted, I can't say I agree with it all but I asked the question to get all the different views so for that thanks.
I went round last night, I was planning to talk with her straight away. I was in luck she wanted to talk about it. She knew I was pissed of when she told me about the fact that this guy was going to stay over.
I told her, I wasn't comftable with other blokes staying over at her flat, especially ones that had a thing for her. In the ned this bloke didn't stay round she sent him packing because she knew I wasn't that happy about it. She said she had spent the day thinking abour it. She said if it was the other way round she wouldn't be entirely happy about it. She said looking back that if I hadn't had been concerned she would have been a bit worried about how much I cared for you.
Therefore situation resolved, know bloke stays around that flat except me. I am definitely glad we talked about it, I felt much better for it. She is the kind of girl you can talk to if you aren't happy about something, she listens and takes in everything you say.
For those who want my situation clarified, it is a committed exclusive relationship. Not how we planned it. I had been reading this site for a long time before this girl came along and I wasn't planning to rush in. Things have just gone really well.
Cheers again for the advice, I know where to come next time I have concerns.
This isn't just some b1tch he happens to be d1cking. It's a girl he thinks it's serious with and is in a relationship with. I would think a girlfriend needs to respect you as much as a customer or any other friend. Every guy isn't with girls for the sole purpose of f*cking her. If that's all you're doing, then I can see why you don't require anything from her but unguarded holes. Don't think that other people have that same attitude though. For those people they require that everyone close to them meets certain standards or they can't stay, including a girl. It's BECAUSE you have respect for yourself that you demand that everyone around you gives you respect. That's my attitude, and I am happy. Take it from someone who is there.Originally posted by drZaius09
"It's all about respect."
"Don't let her disrespect you."
You guys sure love spitting out these hackneyed quips and phrases. But let me ask you a question: whose respect really matters to you? Personally, I covet respect only from certain people whose opinions of me actually matter, such as:
- My boss
- My subordinates
- My customers
- My mother
- My brother
- My best friends
- Myself
Some b1tch who I happen to be d1cking at the moment does NOT fall into this category. Why? Because her respect means NOTHING to me. Why should it? I'm only f*cking her. If she wasn't here I could be f*cking any other of about a million chicks. My feeling is that some of you have an unhealthy need to be respected by others stemming solely from a deeply-seeded insecurity and lack of respect for YOURSELF. I promise you'll never be happy with this attitude. Take it from someone who knows what it's like to be there.
Then perhaps you can explain to me why the original poster, and the subsequent posters who replied, seem to be focusing only on one aspect of this situation. As far as I can see, nobody laments the fact that this girl has a guy friend, or the fact that they happen to be having dinner together. No, the only sticking point here is that HE'S SLEEPING OVER HER HOUSE. Hmmmm... Perhaps because the basis of male/female romantic relationships is SEX?Originally posted by Quick
Every guy isn't with girls for the sole purpose of f*cking her.
Answer honestly, which do you think is worse:
A) You find out your GF has a guy friend who is her unwavering companion. They do everything together. They share with each other their deepest dreams, desires, and fears. There is no question that your girl confides in this friend more than you. But they have never touched each other physically and never will.
OR
B) You find out your GF has a guy friend who f*cks her brains out twice a week. They hardly say a word to each other besides when they're screwing.
Now, unless you're trying to blow smoke up my ass, your answer is obviously "B." And if I asked you which guy friend from the examples above you'd rather be, your answer would also be "B." But then that contradicts your theory of sex not being the sole purpose of a relationship, doesn't it?
As far as exclusivity goes... saying you're in an "exclusive relationship" is nothing more than a misguided attempt to wrap a warm, fuzzy blanket of security around an otherwise fragile ego. It is merely a figment of your imagination.
We all recognize that sex is an integral part of a relationship. Nobody is pretending that it's not significant. That's one of the main parts of this site, not falling into the trap of not being sexual with a girl. It's far from the only part. Many people are looking for a long term relationship, and the criteria for choosing that girl include a hell of a lot more than sex.
Actually I did mention that I have a big problem with a guy that's interested in her being a part of her life. The thing is, the "contract" in a LTR includes no sex with other people. It doesn't include no friendships with other people. If I was going to be in a LTR with a girl, I would expect to be the person she confides in the most. If her mother died, I would expect her to come to me for solace first. With your examples of A and B, I would consider them equally bad for a LTR girl. Any girl in a LTR is a possibility for marriage. The woman I marry will also be the woman I'm closest to. For any other type of relationship, B would be worse.
I would also rather be B because I can find close friendships with guys or ugly women. I can only be fbuddies with hot women. It's true that nothing is guaranteed, not even in an exclusive relationship. You must think marriages cant work either since they're just more formal exclsive relationships. I know that I have the ability to not cheat on a woman, so I know there are woman that have that same ability.
I don't know why we highjacked this thread, but all I really wanted to express to you was that just because you don't believe in BF/GF stuff doesn't mean that the people who are in them are worse off than you.
Actually I did mention that I have a big problem with a guy that's interested in her being a part of her life. The thing is, the "contract" in a LTR includes no sex with other people. It doesn't include no friendships with other people. If I was going to be in a LTR with a girl, I would expect to be the person she confides in the most. If her mother died, I would expect her to come to me for solace first. With your examples of A and B, I would consider them equally bad for a LTR girl. Any girl in a LTR is a possibility for marriage. The woman I marry will also be the woman I'm closest to. For any other type of relationship, B would be worse.
I would also rather be B because I can find close friendships with guys or ugly women. I can only be fbuddies with hot women. It's true that nothing is guaranteed, not even in an exclusive relationship. You must think marriages cant work either since they're just more formal exclsive relationships. I know that I have the ability to not cheat on a woman, so I know there are woman that have that same ability.
I don't know why we highjacked this thread, but all I really wanted to express to you was that just because you don't believe in BF/GF stuff doesn't mean that the people who are in them are worse off than you.
Last edited:
Men frequently err by talking too much. They often monopolize conversations, droning on and on about topics that bore women to tears. They think they're impressing the women when, in reality, they're depressing the women.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Well, atleast she has ballz enough to tell you FLAT out she was testing you. That would piss me off too...but then again, I'm trying to control my stress levels.She said looking back that if I hadn't had been concerned she would have been a bit worried about how much I cared for you.
You did mean, 'how much I cared for her' right.
( . )( . )
Banned
.
Last edited: