Jealous girl seeking advice

[marianne]

I am a slightly jealous girlfriend, I read an article on this website that said jealous men should play it cool and not attempt to restrict their girlfriends behaviour, ie: lunch with ex, or male strip club, and she would respect him. Would you say this approach can work in the reverse? Or will "letting" my boyfriend go to strip clubs and lunch with past flames just give him opportunities that he can't resist?[/COL:nervous: OR]

 

[far from average]

Post a picture.

 

[marianne]

oh, come ON! Fine.

 

[marianne]

http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7294/2896/1600/mepic.0.jpg

there's the link to my picture, didn't know how else to do it. It's huge for some reason. Anyways I know I shouldn't hope for any serious advice, but if you could that would be great.

 

[Desdinova]

Forgive the horny newbies on the site. Many of them are still trying to land a woman.

I read an article on this website that said jealous men should play it cool and not attempt to restrict their girlfriends behaviour, ie: lunch with ex

I'm guessing that was on the main site since most of the guys here (including me) don't agree with her keeping an ex in her life. An ex is an ex for a reason.

As for strip clubs, they're only entertainment. I have no problem with my woman going out for some entertainment with her friends. Let's face it, most women won't get undressed and squirt whipped cream all over themselves for their men.

I don't know what goes on in male strip clubs, but I'm sure he wouldn't do any of the 5hit those guys do just for your entertainment.

 

[spider_007]

......just give him opportunities that he can't resist?

it all depends on how weak your man is, and how much he likes you.

 

[marianne]

Thank you, Desdinova. So are you saying I should just play it cool if he vere wants to have lunch with an ex? Because there's a school of thought that says thats inappropriate, and that I should go with him. I myself have no interest in male strip clubs, or in even speaking to my exes, because I am only interested in my BF. Should I expect the same from him?

 

[Kumar]

Post a picture.

:crackup:

The quality of the advice you will get here will be proportional to your HB rating. The hotter you are the dumber the advice, the uglier you are the smarter the advice.

Therefore if you are one ugly chick, you will get such gems as: Stick with your man because you can't do any better.

or

If you are a fine babe HB9.99 then you will get gems such as:\

"What time can you be at my house? Don't forget to pick up the condoms on the way and some beer for after sex relaxation.

I just saw your supposed pic and I love those eyes. Does tha t model come with a mute button?

K

 

[DanelMadr]

My compliments. You have noble features - apperance.

Acting cool about meeting exs is one thing but everyone knows it is not OK, right?

You cant freak out and you cant let him do this. Is he going out with other women because he has reason to believe that your relantionship is not so hot? Is he looking for "insurance" - backup? If so...let him know your interest level is high.

Check your intuition...does he love you and respects you? If not so strong...bad.

 

[marianne]

Thanks also, spider. He seems pretty strong. What brought all this on was that he was camping last month, and hung out with these guys, and two girls that were with them. Apparently the girls gave my BF their phone numbers and said they'd like to hang out at the lake again sometime. (my BF has a boat) What freaked me out was that he didn't tell me about it for a month! He said he thought I'd freak out, but he never called them and didn't plan to. I wouldn't have been so irked by it if he had just told me at the time, when he keeps secrets it feels like he's ashamed or something, and if he has no reason to be, why keep secrets?

 

[Desdinova]

So are you saying I should just play it cool if he vere wants to have lunch with an ex?

I'm not saying that at all. Read again, an ex is an EX for a reason.

However, I feel the need to inform you that if you haven't been with him for very long, don't expect him to abandon an ex too quickly. AFCs like to hang onto useless, 5hitty things that are of no use

But, if you've been with him for a while (2+ months), you have every right to say something about him showing attention to someone who doesn't deserve it (the ex).

Do you know what the circumstances were for them breaking up?

 

[marianne]

Thanks Danelmadr, I think he does actually. And he gets jealous too sometimes. I just can't handle secrets

 

[Kumar]

Thanks also, spider. He seems pretty strong. What brought all this on was that he was camping last month, and hung out with these guys, and two girls that were with them. Apparently the girls gave my BF their phone numbers and said they'd like to hang out at the lake again sometime. (my BF has a boat) What freaked me out was that he didn't tell me about it for a month! He said he thought I'd freak out, but he never called them and didn't plan to. I wouldn't have been so irked by it if he had just told me at the time, when he keeps secrets it feels like he's ashamed or something, and if he has no reason to be, why keep secrets?

You would have freaked out matter what, like you are doing now. Get over it. If you keep acting like this he will think you are a possesive bytch and he will lose respect for you. Act cool and he will be able to develop trust in you.

K

 

[marianne]

ha ha actually I've been with him for 3 years! The lunch with ex thing is just an example, there isn't any immediate threat of it happening. I guess I'm actually pretty lucky. He hasn't talked to any of his exes, as far as I know. Plus his dad says I'm the prettiest girl he's dated, and I seen pics of his last GF. Woof!

 

[marianne]

thanks Kumar, that's why i'm here, figured I was overreacting. I appreciate your bluntness!

 

[Kumar]

his dad says I'm the prettiest girl he's dated, and I seen pics of his last GF. Woof!

Yeah, you may be the prettiest but not the best in bed, so he may keep you around for status and doing someone else for pleasure.

K

 

[Desdinova]

What freaked me out was that he didn't tell me about it for a month

The reason for him keeping something like that from you is, he didn't want to piss you off or have you overreact.

In other words, he cares about your feelings. That's just how men show it in situations like this.

 

[marianne]

PS I'm going to mexico with my friends this weekend, (my bF was invited but apparently the resort doesn't allow dirtbikes so he declined.) He's going to the lake with his friends. I keep picturing all these women throwing themselves at him, but I'm not gonna say anything. Just be cool, right, like it ain't no thang?

 

[Kumar]

Oops didn't mean that to come out the way it did. Anyways gotta go. Ciao.

 

[marianne]

The reason for him keeping something like that from you is, he didn't want to piss you off or have you overreact.

In other words, he cares about your feelings. That's just how men show it in situations like this.

YAY! Thanks Desdinova! You're right! He's always been very considerate of my feelings. I'm sure it made him feel like a big man too, still scoring digits. No harm done I guess.