Jariel’s Don Juan Tip Sheet

[TheTrader]

I define a cold approach as approaching a complete stranger without receiving any kind of signal (eye contact, smile etc) and chatting her up in the hope of getting a number.

I suppose it's not fair of me to say they don't work, period, because even though I've not seen it for myself, I believe some guys do get dates from them. However, in terms of a success/failure ratio, even the top guys admit to looking at a LOT more fails than successes, which I consider a lot of wasted time, and a massive blow to the confidence of anyone starting out. I also believe any woman who gives her number to a stranger seems a bit too easy and should be treated with caution.

Personally, I prefer to go for "warm approaches" where I have some kind of signal first or have a common topic to break the ice (i.e. they're friends of my friends, they work or study the same place as me etc). I'd estimate I have over 80% success ratio in these cases.

I should also clarify that I consider cold approaching in bars/clubs an exception, as women are under the effects of alcohol and often out looking for guys. These definitely DO work, and in my opinion is the easiest way for any guy to get laid (providing that's all he wants).

i completely agree. in that definition cold approaching=h0 chasing

 

[MrS]

Couple of thigns I need to keep in mind.

 

[Monkey]

One of the best and most concise posts I think I've ever read on these forums.

 

[Dante3214]

*snaps like a loser*


Gewd Post!

 

[El MonoLoco]

Bravo....


Me Likey....nevermind the haters..



:rockon:

 

[comic_relief]

I have girls throwing themselves at me, and not because they're desperate

Girls do throw themselves at guys when the guys worth it. If you're not working towards being the target of said throwing, then you're missing the whole point.

:rockon:

Most don't believe that the girls that all men crave about approach if you are worth it. I had one girl approach me, while I was about to get into my car. She started to talk to me and then asked me if I had a girlfriend. I was on month three of my girlfriends so I said "Yeah, I have a girlfriend."

It is just funny to watch the hottest girls completely change and want me like AFCs do with the hot girls. I love it.

comic_relief

PS She is a starter on the softball and field hockey team. NHS and a lot of other clubs. 95 honor roll. Thank you sosuave for allowing me to become the man that I am today

 

[The Truth]

I like this post. It covers the essentials in an easy to read and memorise kinda way. Posts like this are MUCH better than reading some of the epic sized tips with lots of tangents and drivel on here!

 

[rsxtreme]

i really like this post.

 

[izza]

Study as much seduction theory as you wish, but until you have seen it working, it is just theory so don’t expect miracles! You will hear/read many theories, lies and exaggerations, even from the “experts”, so never follow anything blindly. Get in the field and see for yourself whether it works or not! If it doesn’t, reevaluate it, adapt it or simply drop it and try something else. Learn from trial and error.

Strategies, techniques or lines merely act as a crutch - at some point you are going to have to walk on your own. The more you practise, the sooner you can do this!

Important point

When girls talk about “nice guys” they are talking about guys who are nice with ulterior motives, guys who supplicate, won’t stand up for themselves or lack sexuality.

YES! Well put, thank you! Otherwise, very concise global post.

Izza

 

[crossboss]

Question from reading your post

If a girl seems like she doesn't seem to feel comfortable being close to you, does that mean she is uninterested?

 

[The Truth]

only 3 stars?

 

[James Bondage]

I'm not trying to jump on anyone's d*** or whatever, but I think this post wouldn't look out of place in the Bible. No?

 

[john_1234]

I define a cold approach as approaching a complete stranger without receiving any kind of signal (eye contact, smile etc) and chatting her up in the hope of getting a number.

I suppose it's not fair of me to say they don't work, period, because even though I've not seen it for myself, I believe some guys do get dates from them. However, in terms of a success/failure ratio, even the top guys admit to looking at a LOT more fails than successes, which I consider a lot of wasted time, and a massive blow to the confidence of anyone starting out. I also believe any woman who gives her number to a stranger seems a bit too easy and should be treated with caution.

Personally, I prefer to go for "warm approaches" where I have some kind of signal first or have a common topic to break the ice (i.e. they're friends of my friends, they work or study the same place as me etc). I'd estimate I have over 80% success ratio in these cases.

I should also clarify that I consider cold approaching in bars/clubs an exception, as women are under the effects of alcohol and often out looking for guys. These definitely DO work, and in my opinion is the easiest way for any guy to get laid (providing that's all he wants).

that's on point jariel with my personal experiences as well. i've cold approached and received numbers NUMEROUS times. out of all those cold approaches (just like how you defined a cold approach to be), i sealed the deal only twice and i went on one date that didn't go anywhere... and that was probably out of around 50 or so cold approaches.. waaaay more failures than successes. i have a lot more success @ bars/clubs. i have the most success when i meet women through friends, small parties/get-togethers. but despite my failure rate w/ cold approaches, i still do them

 

[I love Hyori Lee]

I just rated a star of 5 on this one.

 

[rock]

Self improvement is the surest path you can take to being successful with women

This is the best advice

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

Short and simple... GREAT POST! I rate this one of the most clear DJ tip ever. Goodjob Jariel hope you make more posts like these in the future.

 

[lurker]

Another error is how you think a woman will make it easy if they have interest. This would only happen if she's either extremely interested in you or if she's desperate, but most women will not throw themselves towards someone.
Chatting with women over the internet is also not good advice for someone who is shy. Do you honestly think a shy person is pushing their comfort zones by sitting in a chair anonymously typing to someone behind a computer screen? If anything, that person would become more shy and timid in real life.[/QUOTE]


i like this post but this chap has a point here. very good point.

 

[wildchild]

Excellent post mate! Can you tell me what you mean by the pet names bit when flirting. Do you mean saying things like Cup cake and sweetheart etc. I usualy use sweetheart, treasure or treasure chest

 

[rocky_mtn]

Good post, well written. This stuff works.

Last night I got a HB's #, while another AFC hitting on her was standing right there. I've always been to shy to ask for #s let alone do it infront of the competition. Wait, you don't ask for #s, you tell them that they need to give you her #. I'll have to type up a FR if I get time. Game on. :yes:

 

[HB_Hunter]

Keep your options open

Keep your cards close to your chest, but not too close

In the initial stages of seduction or dating, you should never reveal how you feel, even if she tries to prompt you or asks you. Showing your interest should be treated like a volume slider: if you raise the volume too loud, she’s going to get freaked out! So you need to turn it up gradually so she feels comfortable as things progress.


[Good luck!

yoo jariel... great thread that i like to pass by . especially when im having problems . so that point plus the point of being a cool guy is what confuse me at times . like .... I should show interest , play the ball in her court , be indifferent to the outcome . To show her that i want her not need her . But it shouldn't be that obvious , it shouldn't be too much . like volume tuning...it shouldn't be that loud or else it will scare her away .

for me , it is sometimes hard to differentiate btw too much and not giving interest at all . depending on the situation also , girl , something like sitting closer to her , talking with her mostly , focusing on her might be too much and it maybe also too little to start the spark . I know that this couldn't be masterted logically . I don't want it either to be like a philosophy or logic .

It happens when im going out in a group and to a less extent in a date . i have fun , play around the girls and subtley focus on the girl i like naturally but when i sense that it's too much attention, sense that she's bored , not interested , playing games , get out of light subjects to talk about . I focus on other girls and leave her wondering for a while for fear of being thought of as throwing myself at her as alot of girls act like that with me N it's gross .

it's like i want to escalate things without being too obvious . i like this one step at a time approach or volume tuning thing but can you explain a bit further about that . as for me it's like tuning the volume so slowly till it becomes shallow , risk loosing rapport n preserving the ego or in another explanation: (A girl won't invest herself unless she thinks you're investing yourself too! Sometimes you've got to give them something to go on, a small compliment, maybe a quick "you know I like you", a lingering look )Or tuning the volume too much too soon , putting the ego on the line then feeling gross or fear being thought as that .

It's like i want a medium btw these 2 paths . cz at alot of times it's like pressurzing myself to escalate the relationship especially if she's hot n got alot of attention n guys though not being an attention hore . I fon't like that . no anyalsis paralysis....having fun , natural but at times ...it's like or shoul be like a game , tips or you fear loosing rapport , being clueless etc..