ive got a problem like loco yo quiero

[Batman]

Hey I have a bit of a problem its sort of complicated my good friend and soul mate is going off to college she’s beautiful and as some of you know I am following her the next year because she’s a grade ahead of me. She likes me and knows that I love her and I think at least is willing to wait for me she’s that kind of girl. But I was in the lunch room today during exams and were was talking it up all nice she was tired and in a bad mood cause this goon hacked my email to piss her off by saying he wanted to **** her and called her a slut and a **** and everything that’s terrible and he walked by so she went to the bathroom I left the café went to my exam and I was trying to get out of my class to come back I do and she’s sitting with this guy she said she kind of likes but cant have because he has a g/f and is in love with someone or other I don’t know I wasn’t listening but anyway I saw that they were sitting close on the opposite sides of the table facing each other and I felt this surge of jealousy not like anything in a long time. I felt like pulling her out have there and asking if she wanted to explain to me what she was doing and all. I didn’t say anything to her I just pretended to get a drink and left. But is this normal guys I mean even though were not going out yet and everything I still consider her close to me. And it hurts like im actually pissed off is this normal?

 

[xblitz44x]

You're 16. You've never had this feeling before, that's why you don't understand it. You won't understand it until it's happened a few times. She's not your soul mate. We've all been where you are, that particular girl is the reason many of us came here to begin with. She's going to fvck your heart up and leave you crying in your bed at night. And you're going to keep asking yourself "why?". When you're reading to learn, study a few things, you can start at the bible. Then go to www.seducingwomen101.com to figure out where those feelings are coming from. Then just realize, THAT SAME "girl" is going to come after you in and out of your life (not in the physical form. She'll look different, have a different name, but make you feel the same). She'll keep coming at you until you've had enough experience and have grown enough so that you are READY to accept her. Enjoy the ride.

-Blitz

 

[Quick]

There is definitely a connection between one-itis and a lack of sentences and paragraphs.

Number 1. Read the dj bible.

Number 2. You're living in a dreamworld. You don't have her now, and you won't have her in college. What kind of fantasy world do you live in where you think that a girl you aren't even with will wait for you? Girls in genuine committed relationships often don't wait for a guy. Girls never wait for their obsessed, afc, "friend".


If she knows that you "love" her, and she tells you about guys that she likes, and isn't in a relationship with you, then she has absolutely no interest in you. She does, however, like your attention and will cheerfully continue to soak up your attention, while she pursues and fvcks other guys, uses you as her emotion tampon, and emasculates you.


Maybe i'm missing something. It's hard to believe anyone is this deluded. Why do you think she wants you as a boyfriend? What promises has she made to you as far as being together? How long have you known her, and how far sexually have you gotten with her? You say you're not going out yet. Why not, and what makes you think you will?

 

[Gangster Of Love]

She likes me and knows that I love her and I think at least is willing to wait for me she’s that kind of girl.

She knows you LOVER her, but she only LIKES you? First of all, how does she know you love her? Friends only LIKE YOU, lovers/soul mates LOVE YOU.

she’s sitting with this guy she said she kind of likes but cant have because he has a g/f and is in love with someone or other I don’t know I wasn’t listening but anyway I saw that they were sitting close on the opposite sides of the table facing each other and I felt this surge of jealousy not like anything in a long time.

She told you she kind of likes this guy? You're in the Friends Zone pal. Get out ASAP, or get ready to hear all about the "jerks" she meets and goes out with in college.

I felt like pulling her out have there and asking if she wanted to explain to me what she was doing and all. I didn’t say anything to her I just pretended to get a drink and left.

Lucky for you, you didn't make an A$$ out of yourself. She owes you no explanations. The better you are at keeping your cool, the more success you'll have with the babes, maybe not this one, though.

But is this normal guys I mean even though were not going out yet and everything I still consider her close to me.

Wether this is normal or not, is not the issue. The real issue here is the amount of power you are giving this girl over your emotions.

Why is this "Soul Mate" still just a friend? How long has this been the case? Why haven't you made your moves yet, a while back? You are stuck in the friend zone. She knows she's got you wrapped around her finger. She can't have the other guy, YET, so that's where her interest is now.

I would stay away and occupy myself with more empowering stuff. But if you really must, then put the moves, show serious romantic interest, which should have been done long time ago, before she leaves. That will give you a better idea on what to do when its time for you to follow her to college. You want to find out if you have a chance, BEFORE you go out there. This is called 'qualifiying your prospect'. If she gives you a the LJBF treatment, just go about your own life, go out with other girls, and make sure she knows about it. Yes, it doesn't sound logical, but that might be the only thing you can do at this point to spark some interest, better than you trying to be nice and worrying too much about not upseting her. The guy she likes is probably not concerned about what she thinks of him. That guy can make a move now, even if she won't be with him after the summer, and she will go out with him.
My friend, you are very young, so start learning some of these realities. I wish I would have had the chance to learn and take advice from a forum like this when I was 16. Took me almost 10 years to let go of my AFC ways.

 

[Batman]

thats last one ment the most to me

i really liked the last one the last reply instead of saying its not going to work i got advice and i didnt feel bad about it. there are so many player haters on this board but i enjoy adive thats both meaningful and dosnt put me down and make me feel like its never gonna happen.

 

[xblitz44x]

I'm not here to tell you what 'feels good'. You're only going to comprehend what you want to comprehend. Your ego is out of control. Instead of trying to do little tricks and tactics to 'get her', figure out WHY she doesn't like YOU. Learn why you feel the way to do. When you have that sort of knowledge you are in control. I'm telling you that the way you feel is going to happen probably 3 more times before you finally grow up. It's happened to me that many times. Even the 'hard-ass' guy here who you'd think it NEVER happens to...it's happened to them. Just figure out what the fvck it is, and be ready for it.

-Blitz

 

[1utfan1]

Re: thats last one ment the most to me

Originally posted by Batman
i really liked the last one the last reply instead of saying its not going to work i got advice and i didnt feel bad about it. there are so many player haters on this board but i enjoy adive thats both meaningful and dosnt put me down and make me feel like its never gonna happen.

Batman, It's not player hating it's more like tough love. Be grateful that the responese you got weren't sugarcoated with false hopes. The advice might not make you feel good now but it could save you alot of grief later on.

 

[Lone_raider]

Yeah these guys are right. We've all been there, the girl I thought was "the one" came along when I was 17. It's almost like your thoughts are so clouded you can't see the truth and if someone tells you the way it is, you don't want to beleive them.

You've got to realize there is no "soulmate" she is not that incredible, she is just a woman and there will be many more, sure there are people you will get along great with but "soulmate" is a creation of society, of the movies. You've also got to realize that your life is rising and setting on this girl! I was the same once, if she was depressed I was depressed, if she didn't contact me or talk to me one day I wa a mess. I can remember when I was younger and felt that way, I guess like Blitz says you have to experience this for yourself, when you get burned horribly a few times it eventually wakes you up and YOU decide to reevalute what went wrong and how to fix yourself.

The girl that drove me to the internet in search of help so long ago was the one mentioned above. My first post on a different relationships forum was a rambling novel about how I loved her, and while she never showed much in return I just new it had to be true lol My god what a pathetic sap I was, now that I look back I was more like a lost puppy dog or something.

 

[Master of the Universe]

Blitz wrote,

THAT SAME "girl" is going to come after you in and out of your life (not in the physical form. She'll look different, have a different name, but make you feel the same). She'll keep coming at you until you've had enough experience and have grown enough so that you are READY to accept her. Enjoy the ride.

Very, very well said, and incredibly true. I think most guys should read that phrase a few times... there's more here than meets the eyes.

In my humble opinion this is the closest to discovering the "meaing of it all" than anything else I've read on this board.

Again, my compliments.

Master of the Universe

P.S. Looking for a clue? Alright, it's "READY to accept her."

 

[Ronny_Neumonic II]

Dudes, telling him that if he improves himself he can have this girl is NOT helpin anyone. He only liked the last part of gangsters post cause it ended up with him getting the girl.

He posted the same thing in the HS forum...

 

[-Zero_h0uR-]

If you found your soul mate at 16, then everything I know about women and love is totally wrong.

Hell, I got in a relationship at 16, in my very AFC days, and we broke up when I was 22 and I knew the entire time she wasn't my soul mate... There's no such thing. We were put on this Earth for one thing. Pro-creatioon. Did cavemen have soul mates?

**** no.

Sure, you're intensely infatuated with this girl, but I highly doubt you're in love with her.

The best solution, is to stop talking to her, and to start talking to other girls. There are so many girls out there in this world, and you're telling me you found THE ONE AND ONLY ONE FOR YOU at age 16? Come on.

Be honest about it, batman.


-- Zero-

 

[Walden]

Hey Batman,

I can only really agree with what MOTU said.

Unfortunately when you've got a lot emotionally invested , a lot of the fun goes out of the game , which is a pity.

My advice would be to go out and chase 3 other women , but if you feel you're in l*ve with her then you probably don't want to.

If you are going to tell her how you feel , then just tell her you have a bit of a crush on her (rather than telling her you're in l*ve with her , which will scare her and not in a good way). That solves your cognitive disconance , and lets you still be friends. And hell , maybe she's carrying a little candle for you and that seed of an idea may well burst out of it's bra at a college party three years from now.

Oh , yeah , and go find three other women.

Good hunting.