It's that time : What's going on with your game?

[gradhodude]

Pretty similar stage you are in \O/. Got out of a LTR back in July, and have had a bit of a struggle getting past it. It was a mutual break as we didn't want the same things, but struggling to get back in the game always makes you revert to what was. Never helps that she is dating someone.

I know a lot of people on here preach working on yourself...but you know what that 75% of my life is great. I have an awesome job that I really like and make good $$$. I love where I live as I own a great bachelor pad condo in the heart of the city in a great neighborhood. I have a great social circle, including a few top quality wingmen. I also have been kicking up the working out. I am up to 3-4 times a week and finally noticing things.

My issue is not a lack of getting out there, as my social circle allows me to have something to do every weekend, and most weeknights if I want. I think it's just this urge that I either try to force it which shows, or I start to not give a damn and get to drunk. Getting that middle ground has been tough.

I also tried online dating which is a complete waste of time like everyone has said on here. I am done with that, but now I am back to meeting chicks at Bars/ or events where people drink. Don't get me wrong I would love to meet someone in these situations as it is what I like to do, but it's easier said than done! And no I do not go to coffee shops or Art festivals. It's not me and I truly doubt I will find the type of chick I am after anyway. I am also not looking to settle for some chick, not joining my other friends who have caved.

So summing up yeah things are great lifewise, but chick wise things suck.

 

[Desdinova]

Been with my gf for over a year. It seems her IL just keeps on going higher. We've got a damn good relationship.

Over the last couple of months, I've been going through the nasty part of my divorce. I've had to hire a lawyer and raise some money to pay for him. My ex decided that she wasn't happy with what was in the separation agreement and has decided to try and break it. There's a lot of goofy 5hit attached to it (all from her end of things) and I'll probably end up writing a thread about it once it's all done and over with - hopefully in mid-December.

I've been pretty moody for the last month or so. My gf has been incredibly supportive and has tolerated my ups and downs throughout the whole thing. She understands that things are financially fvcked up for me right now, so she's been treating me by taking me out to dinner and buying me stuff that I want.

And my kid is in the middle of this entire mess. I've been dealing with him lashing out at school. He's in grade one and he punched out a 4th grader (I can't help but be a little bit proud of that one ) but he's obvously having trouble dealing with the stress going on.

But all in all, it could be worse.

 

[Die Hard]

Putting myself together after an intense relationship with an HB9 - cluster B. Been there, done that, but I must admit the aftermath is tougher and requires significantly more effort than I had anticipated. It's been years since I've been in this position, where I really have to put up a fight in order to "move on". It's a humbling experience, and a good lesson.

I'm currently in between jobs too, so I have way too much free time on my hands, which is kinda driving me crazy. A person isn't meant to do nothing all day long, lol. It drives me to think and contemplate a lot, a WHOLE LOT!! Obviously, that doesn't combine well with the aftermath of the relationship, where my mind is constantly drawn to her and I would be well served by some DISTRACTION through having a busy life! Now it's the opposite...

On the other hand, this is not all that bad. Everyday life can be quite hectic...there's your work life, your social life, your hobbies, your love life etc. etc. As a human being, you can be so busy! For days, weeks, years...like you're flying through life on auto-pilot. It's not so bad to step away from it all for a moment, to step outside of your life and outside of the world for a moment and just observe and analyze it all from the sidelines. I find that I'm getting closer to myself in these current times I'm going through.

Kinda feels like I'm being thrown back to my core, through all of this. Like when you live in a bare forest for a while, without any electronic devices or antyhing, just you vs. nature, basic survival. Replenishes the soul, brings you closer to yourself...
Yeah, I made a mistake by getting emotionally attached to this girl, while I actually knew from the very first date that she was NOT the right kind of girl to do that with! But it's like I somehow NEEDED to do this, as if I wanted to test myself or something, like I wanted to find out how strong I really am in the heat of battle.
Staying emotionally detached, it's easy to "survive", the bytch can't get to you. Like living in your modern house, with all its electrical facilities, food ready for you in the refrigerator, hot shower whenever you feel like it etc.
Once emotionally attached, things become tougher, you have to make a real effort to "survive". Like living in the forest, where you HAVE to find some wood and start a fire to keep yourself warm, where you HAVE to catch some fish in the river in order to get nutrition etc.

Obviously, I didn't think this out or planned it. But I feel like I subconsciously chose to do it as I got to spend more time with her. I had some kind of urge inside me, like when some guy feels he needs to make an attempt at climbing Mt. Everest, even though he knows it will be a hazardous enterprise holding very realistic dangers of frostbite, hypothermia and whatnot.

Weird as it may sound: on some level, I like where I'm being now... Kicked down to the ground, struggling to get up on my feet again. This is when I perform best, this is where I thrive... It's where I get the 'eye of the tiger', connect with my survival instinct and some sort of raw, unstoppable energy gets released inside of me. Kinda similar to how Bruce Banner will suddenly turn into the Hulk when he gets pushed and when he is in danger.

So that's where I am now... I emotionally surrendered to this bytch and got hurt, got knocked down to the floor. Now I have to overcome this hurt and get back on my feet again, I'm on the rebound. But once I get back on my feet, I'm figuratively gonna kick some ass all over the fvcking place!, much harder than I EVER kicked ass before... That's what I'm preparing myself for now, it feels good, I feel strong. I'm gonna get back in the game and go on a real tear....

All this energy is being put into self improvement: I'm working out harder and more frequently than before and it shows, I am becoming a beast and am currently more muscular than I've ever been before...I'm strengthening the belief in myself and my own abilities, I am forging my confidence and feelings of self-worth stronger than they have ever been before, and so forth and so forth...I've gone back to the drawing board and am redesigning myself towards the best 'me' that has ever been.

I still feel sort of damaged by the recent relationship and I can't really enjoy other women yet, but as I'm tapping into that raw power inside of me, I notice how I'm getting lots of attention lately...I have this real strong and powerful presence and women pick up on it, get drawn to me. Once I'm fully back on my feet and have finalised my rebound, I'm gonna be stronger than ever, be more succesful than ever, and do some SERIOUS pimpin!!

 

[backbreaker]

This year we did thanksgiving. there is a large portion of my family my wife has never met, cousins, uncles, etc. the entire side of my mom's family basically came out here.

I got a cousin, i haven't seen here in a few years. she's 4 years younger than me. let's just say she's grown up. allt he white guys talking about how black women aren't pretty there is not a dude here that wouldn't talk to her, she's 5'10, about 120 pounds, high cheek bones, not ghetto whatsoever. she's my mother's younger sister's youngest daughter. she's a solid 8.5 easily. and the reason i say all that is to say, i mean.. **** this is the girl who i used to babysit and used to play Nintendo with every day after school and it's funny to watch guys tripping over their words talking to her and i'm like due this is tinki lol. we have a few strangler friends over who don't have family here and all the guys are like "dude who the **** is that lol she's smokin" and i can see looking and knowing at her how girls can get sick of it beucase she really isnt' a prude or stuck up.


it's the first time my wife has seen my aunt and my little cousins and everyone has cone a very very long way since i introduced them when she was pregnant. she fits in now, no one gives her any **** about anything, she helps out with the cooking she just fits right in wth the rest of my family and more than anything that makes me feel really good beucase that's all she has eve rwanted in that regard for them to accecpt her.


i got to say guys my uncle and I threw the **** down on the grill.. yes we grilled for thanksgiving. **** was off the chain. grilled ham, grilled chicken, grilled corn on the cobb, i'll be eating quite good for a few days.

it's funny how it all works hwen you are little on thanksgiving your parents are in the living room drinking watching football and you and the kids are outside playing, and now i'm the guy watching TV drinking with my uncles and friends watching football.

more than anything i'm very glad to see my family starting to really mesh.. it's become quite apparent just how good if a fit her and I are despite the difference of color.

 

[Jitterbug]

Chicks wise, I've been lazy and picking from my social circle plus referrals for the last couple of years. I want to get out of my comfort zone again, and have been working on that lately. Plus I want to nail hotter girls more consistently (don't we all lol) Been working on my physique with very good results, but still a few more months from making them babes lick their lips, which coincide nicely with summer here and my travelling plan for next year. Atm I get lots of compliments and arse groping, shoulder & abs feeling up. Nailed a MILF and a German backpacker recently from just that, without really doing much gaming.

Having said that, I'm working on being laconic, as it seems to suit me really well when gaming women. I have a tendency to talk a little too much and too fast when I get excited due to me having much higher energy level than the average person.

I'm also learning a new language to expand my talent pool, as I'm getting rather tired of Aussie chicks with their masculine behaviours. Checking out Roosh's stuff more often now to pick up some tips on foreign girls.

 

[muscleman]

As far as women go it's getting easier as time goes on. Experience, social proof, rising SMV ... so that part of the game is there. Looks, well I could definitely work on style, but need more $ for that, my body is where it needs to be.

My main game right now is figuring out wtf I want to do for work. The past 1.5 years I've tried 5 jobs in 3 career fields. I work part time at a startup right now and have a night job I'm building up (bartending). Mainly looking to get into the hot spots for the night job and see what's up with the startup (should know one way or the other soon). Been doing a TON of introspection all year, just generally figuring out and planning what path I want to take.

So, money game is where it's at for me + more long term goal setting. I'll be 30 in a year and I don't feel like I'm where I need to be at all financially, despite having owned my own place for over 3 years, car paid off, and no debt besides mortgage. Also don't feel like I have my 'path' figured out nearly as much as I should.

Girls will come as they come, not worried about that. A clear sense of direction, that's another story.

 

[sharkbeat]

I was away from SS for quite a while -- more than a year actually. I felt like I hit a wall, couldn't progress more, and I decided that I needed to step away to clear my head, and tried to resolve things on my own, rather than complain and read conflicting posts in this forum.

After a while, got a gf, I had forgotten about SS, and decided to detach myself from the entire seduction crap. I thought it was pretty stupid. Life moved on. The last few months I've been planning on what I want to do with the rest of my life.

Why did I decide to come back? First was curiosity, and second was that the whole time I was away, I learned a new kind of wisdom. I couldn't quite explain it, but it boosted my confidence, social skills, changed my perspective of life. It has changed me so much that I don't remember what I was like before. Anyway, with the newfound wisdom, I thought to myself, what will I learn now if I come back to the seduction? Will there be some golden pieces that I had missed all this year?

It's never been about women, or seduction, or becoming alphas for me. It's always been my passion to keep improving myself, so I came back, hungry for more.

 

[backbreaker]

Wife and I are doing great. Took a trip to the West Coast last week. Had a fun time. I can't really complain as she is taking good care of me. Cooks, cleans, & plenty of sex. She's taking care of herself, exercising and what not. Well she's sick with a cold so I gotta take care of her for a few days.

Overall my day game (i.e. regular interactions) are fine. I'm working on shortening my sentences, speaking only when necessary, and listening more. Looking people in the eye more. Avoiding sarcasm except when it's actually humorous. I've come to realize that if you're bold and direct, you have a leg up on a lot of Americans, who are lost in their little worlds of cell phones and tablets and can't handle direct confrontation of any kind.

As for work, I'm in a plateau of sorts and enjoying it. Doing my job well while I plan for whatever the next step is.

you bring up an extremely good point, one that a lot of married guys over look or get trolled into thinking that if they do it they are horrible husbands.

Game, i.e talking to women is a skillset. one that took me years to aquiare and hone.

ironically enough, the best way to keep the frame with your woman at least in my experience, is to keep your game honed. the reason i say that, is that subconsciously the second you know you've lost it or think about how much work you have to put back into getting the skill set back lol, bye bye frame. nice knowing you.

you start not putting your foot down buecase you don't want to take it there. you don't kid her about not going to the gym because you don't want to piss her off.

in short, it's my ability to KNOW that if i had to walk or she had to walk, that i will be fine.. ****. tomorrow. i could go out tomorrow and have date for this weekend no question in my mind... that allows me to keep the frame with my wife. she's a good gal, but she's a woman. y9ou give them an inch by nature they want to take a mile.

i'm not going to say i flirt, beucase i really don't, but i talk to women, i mess with them, i tease, i hold conversations.. just to make sure that i can still pick up on stuff, who to get the conversation going where i want it to go.

 

[Black Widow Void]

I'm sort of new / back in the game after a two year relationship. I'm still chasing skirts, but after a long relationship, I'm in low gear for just the time being.

As far as my game, I'm trying something new. I'm taking time to look back on all my (presumably) failed intro attempts. Of course in some cases it could be the woman, but I want to take ownership and correct those which I can confirm are mine.

Although there's the absence of voice tonality and body language, I'm testing some previous game scenario's with some avg looking on-line gals. This way I can confirm which game-plan works and which do not. They use us to build their ego and I am using them to test out previous game tactics. If a couple of avg looking girls do not bite, then I *know* that I need to nix a specific tactic. For those that have taken hold of a specific tactic... Well, I'm not above taking it to 'in person' level.

Still though, I currently see this as practice more than currently meeting my particular type of gal. When I'm going into high-gear mode, I'll have done some fem homework already and be better prepared.

 

[Warrior74]

Good posts all around guys.

 

[wait_out]

Good posts all around guys.

Thank you for keeping us focused on what's important! I met a girl at my sister's grad this weekend, A triple plus chemistry, danced with her a little, the push-pull stuff felt like hide-and-seek, I felt like a wolf eyeing a steak, she knew and would get shy and laugh, with her eyes twinkling.... we live in different cities and we were unfortunately separated at the end of the night, but it reminds me of how valuable and fun the male-female dynamic is. It's a little intoxicating.

THAT is what I need to seek out. Life can be so good to you sometimes.

 

[backbreaker]

when i came here i had a very simple dream.. i wanted to be able to work and go home and call a girl up on a tuesday night and have her come over and we watch some TV and then have sex maybe cook some good food or have a good drink. and i wanted to be able to do this pretty much whenever the **** i felt like it. i also wanted to have the balls to talk to the girls i found attractive.

both of those things are extremely, extremely obtainable.

 

[wait_out]

Group hug

 

[synergy1]

So, money game is where it's at for me + more long term goal setting. I'll be 30 in a year and I don't feel like I'm where I need to be at all financially, despite having owned my own place for over 3 years, car paid off, and no debt besides mortgage. Also don't feel like I have my 'path' figured out nearly as much as I should.

Girls will come as they come, not worried about that. A clear sense of direction, that's another story.

hah, yeah I hear ya. The thing is, you get an overinflated idea of where people 'should' be after reading things online, but the fact is you are better off than 80% of the country. 46 million are on food stamps, the median household salary is 50,000 annually. I too have no debt and all that crap, but still feel pretty much on the bottom of the totem pole even though according to the BLS, I am not. That said, its easy to get to that 30 mark and feel like things aren't as they should have been planned. Its human nature to be unable to predict the future even though we believe we excel at it. We don't. Hence midlife crisis are a common occurrence.

My game this year has been with its normal ups and downs. In regards only to sex, Its been okay. However, with dating ( I hate that word, but lets just roll with it), its been pretty sub par in my locale. Sadly, I have had much better dates while I was visiting other places - better looks and better personalities. Its a really weird duality - I am having very little success with women where I live, but have amazing times when I am anywhere besides here. For example, I took a trip to California a while back and had probably 5+ viable options to date within a week - one of which I actually went out with and had a blast. Smart, sexy, nice, fun to be with. When I come back here, its difficult to get numbers, more difficult to get followups from the phone numbers. To put numbers in perspective, I have gotten over 40 numbers in my locale with zero (0) solid dating prospects since October 2011 thereabouts. While on holiday, I have gotten close to 15-20 numbers, of which 2 were solid dating prospects, and at least 6 were open to the idea of meeting up ( as in they responded when I initiated contact).

That said, I have put women and all of that on the back burner for now. Money is good now, and getting better. The job is giving me basically another college degree's worth of information which will bolster my marketability. I am putting money away for my next venture/self/investments. I am making new friends at work and expanding my social circle a little, and staying in shape. I'll take the women situation by ear and just keep running with the ball while I have it.

 

[backbreaker]

hah, yeah I hear ya. The thing is, you get an overinflated idea of where people 'should' be after reading things online, but the fact is you are better off than 80% of the country. 46 million are on food stamps, the median household salary is 50,000 annually. I too have no debt and all that crap, but still feel pretty much on the bottom of the totem pole even though according to the BLS, I am not. That said, its easy to get to that 30 mark and feel like things aren't as they should have been planned. Its human nature to be unable to predict the future even though we believe we excel at it. We don't. Hence midlife crisis are a common occurrence.

My game this year has been with its normal ups and downs. In regards only to sex, Its been okay. However, with dating ( I hate that word, but lets just roll with it), its been pretty sub par in my locale. Sadly, I have had much better dates while I was visiting other places - better looks and better personalities. Its a really weird duality - I am having very little success with women where I live, but have amazing times when I am anywhere besides here. For example, I took a trip to California a while back and had probably 5+ viable options to date within a week - one of which I actually went out with and had a blast. Smart, sexy, nice, fun to be with. When I come back here, its difficult to get numbers, more difficult to get followups from the phone numbers. To put numbers in perspective, I have gotten over 40 numbers in my locale with zero (0) solid dating prospects since October 2011 thereabouts. While on holiday, I have gotten close to 15-20 numbers, of which 2 were solid dating prospects, and at least 6 were open to the idea of meeting up ( as in they responded when I initiated contact).

That said, I have put women and all of that on the back burner for now. Money is good now, and getting better. The job is giving me basically another college degree's worth of information which will bolster my marketability. I am putting money away for my next venture/self/investments. I am making new friends at work and expanding my social circle a little, and staying in shape. I'll take the women situation by ear and just keep running with the ball while I have it.

we live in a very impatient society. if you really study successful people, for the very most part


1. they spent their 20's learning

2. they spent their 30's applying

3. they spent their 40's reaping

For example, I took a trip to California a while back and had probably 5+ viable options to date within a week - one of which I actually went out with and had a blast.

i really don't understand why Los anagles is not the DJ capital of the world. every single male should be breaking their neck to get out here.

not only are there hotter women, being out here, humbles hot women. no way in hell after living in arkansas for 4-5 years my wife woudln't think her **** doesn't stink and while she's hot, she's not... she's not LA9/9.5 hot (no offense babe)

 

[synergy1]

i really don't understand why Los anagles is not the DJ capital of the world. every single male should be breaking their neck to get out here.

not only are there hotter women, being out here, humbles hot women. no way in hell after living in arkansas for 4-5 years my wife woudln't think her **** doesn't stink and while she's hot, she's not... she's not LA9/9.5 hot (no offense babe)

People usually don't move around too often, especially where I am. Most are born, raised, have kids and die up here. The worst part is that the long winters seem to permit women ( and men too) to get out of shape. Women up here in general are uglier than most other places. Many of my friends who are married are to very homely women.

I was on match.com, and decided to keep the same search criteria and look near the area I want to live in Southern California. ( they send engineers in my department out there routinely) The difference was night and day. There were too many hot women to chose from. If I was living out there, I wouldn't even have time to reach out to them all. Than my spirits sunk as I re-entered my zip code, and it was nothing but worn out looking, slightly overweight ugly women with kids.

Am I wrong to be slightly down about this? Getting A date is difficult enough. Seeing a hot women is rarer still.