It's simple: Attraction is ALL IN THE EYES

[SL2012]

I have come to the conclusion if it this simple and most of it is NON-VERBAL ACTION; all in the EYES.

If a woman finds you attractive/attracted to you/interested etc.; she WILL LOOK AT YOU.

Even if a woman is shy, you will catch an looking at you (maybe from a distance) or trying to "catch your eyes" or will hold your gaze that extra second longer.

E.g, There was a girl at work (she was alot younger) that I know for a fact thought I was good-looking. Everytime I was near her or walked by her, she would ALWAYS make a point to look up to try and catch my eyes and when we made eye contact she would submissively look down.

CONVERSELY:

If a woman finds you unattractive/not interested, etc for whatever reason SHE WILL AVOID YOUR EYES. :cuss:

E.g. There is a girl I find very good-looking in my boot camp conditioning gym class. I have talked to her a couple if times (On my initiation) and she was nice. HOWEVER, she NEVER looks at me when I walk by her (even when I am looking at her) and seems to TRY and AVOID looking at me as I walk by.

This chick is trying to tell me non-verbally. I am NOT interested.


It is not all that hard guys.

An interested woman will look at you.

An uninterested woman will avoid looking at you.

 

[May_Day]

This is true to a point. Shy girls will not make much eye contact until they are comfortable with you. But yes, they should be looking at you for any interest at all.

 

[Uncharted]

True but she doesn't always need to stare you down. I work with a girl that I know is into me (her coworker told me). When I walk by her desk she ignores me. But when I see her at lunch or outside her cube, she holds eye contact, smiles, flirts, etc.

But remember don't hook up with coworkers.

 

[SL2012]

Yeah this chick in gym class walks by me like she has blinders on. When we pass each other (e.g. maybe for a water break) or something she looks to the side as I pass her and I think even looked up and away when I walked by her looking at her in tonight's class.

Only about 10 days ago did I have a few minute convo with her about Triathalons and stuff.

If she were interested, she WOULD NOT be avoiding my eyes.

She might be a rug eater anyway, has a stud earring in her nostril. I have read, depending on what side it is on, one side means she is a lesbian. I also saw some of her Fb pics (I found out her name) and she has zero guys in the pictures.

 

[Jair213]

good post, eye contact is one of the most powerful non verbal communication.

 

[djjizzyjeff]

Funny I had a chick at work eyeing me and smiling a few times as we were both leaving and I hadn't said a word to her. We get outside I sit down with a co worker and she gets in her boyfriends car.

Same thing with another one I was supposed to hang out with in her area. Always stares at me even if I'm not looking at her and when she sees me notice will smile and wave and walk up to talk. Hear from a co worker the next day when she's not at work who knows nothing about it that he was talking to her and she told him Oh my boyfriend just got back from there. Whereas I'd thought they'd been broken up a month or so ago. Needless to say I never bothered to go meet her.

IOI's don't mean much.

 

[VladPatton]

It is still one of many signs. I had a chick in my social circle give me eyes all damn night at a bar last summer. I took it as a sign if interest. It was basically eyeball sex. I asked her out twice and she refused with no counters. Go figure.

In the end, you still have to ask her out, it is inevitable in order to progress.

 

[djjizzyjeff]

So because she had a boyfriend you rule out that she may be attracted to you? Boyfriend or not, if she wants it, she just does, and will not turn it down.

I wouldn't waste my time with chicks with boyfriends. I have morals whether some people care or not. I wouldn't want it to happen to me. Not that it guarantees anything but I have my own standards etc. whether people like it or not.

It is still one of many signs. I had a chick in my social circle give me eyes all damn night at a bar last summer. I took it as a sign if interest. It was basically eyeball sex. I asked her out twice and she refused with no counters. Go figure.

In the end, you still have to ask her out, it is inevitable in order to progress.

Correct. Who knows some chicks may like playing the game of giving off IOI's knowing they have someone or more already just to get new attention. Once it progresses past that they turn you down or walk off to their boyfriend.

Like a faux IOI and or us just having wishful thinking.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Or, you can avoid the eyeball dance altogether with my patented-applied-for "Zero Eye Contact" opener.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=191806&highlight=eye

I use it often because it works.

 

[VladPatton]

Hmmm gotta try that one out.

 

[foreverAFC]

Correct. Who knows some chicks may like playing the game of giving off IOI's knowing they have someone or more already just to get new attention. Once it progresses past that they turn you down or walk off to their boyfriend.

Like a faux IOI and or us just having wishful thinking.

when i first started at my current job, i was getting tons of IOIs, and then i found out nearly all of the females were married or in relationships, they were just looking for ego boosts

 

[djjizzyjeff]

when i first started at my current job, i was getting tons of IOIs, and then i found out nearly all of the females were married or in relationships, they were just looking for ego boosts

Yep. Attraction may be in the eyes and isn't a bad thing but it doesn't mean much either as chicks will also do it confidently if they not only think you're attractive but have their boyfriend etc. as their safety net while they get their ego boost off of you.

Normally a dude would get gassed up seeing a pretty chick (in my case two) checking him out regularly but then it becomes a reality check when you see one of them go right into their boyfriends car picking them up right after it's happened a few times and up to the moment as well as hearing from another dude the next day the second chick told him about her boyfriend. (Most likely an off an on relationship. And I know she had one before. Thought they'd broken up for a while. She'd also mentioned quick a while back they've known each other for a while.) IMO I won't waste my time nor waste it supplying attention. Cordial hello small talk. That's it.

At that point it's best to leave them be and not give them the ego boost. That is if you respect others relationships and don't plan on being their ego boost when things are possibly not going great or they just need some attention from another dude they find attractive or for simply ego purposes.

frig that. Not me. I'll keep it cordial IF they talk other than that I'm not wasting time giving to something that's not worth it.

 

[plate's_empty]

Other than an introduction, where you need to show confidence, I feel making a girl earn your attention (looking directly at her) is powerful.

Also, like another poster was saying, some girls are shy, they'll stare at you as long as they think you can't see them doing it. But the second you look back, she'll be looking in the other direction.

Or, you can avoid the eyeball dance altogether with my patented-applied-for "Zero Eye Contact" opener.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=191806&highlight=eye

I use it often because it works.

I do this^^^^^ all the time at the bar. I'll be sitting down and girls will come up to order a drink. I'll do a slight turn of the head, say something, then go back to looking straight ahead, or take a drink and look away. They'll look directly at me and respond. We'll start having a conversation this way. They'll be turned in my direction, staring at me, talking. And I'll be staring at the TV. LOL. Peripheral vision comes in handy here. If she starts giving big IOI's that's when I'll turn and look her in the eyes. By this time she's been vying for my attention so she won't look away. ....and that's when I plant one on her. AKA the kiss close.

Bam.

Afterwards I'll tell her something along the lines that her friends are probably wondering where she's at, but she should come back and visit me later.

Done. Mind blown. Eyes glassy. And I never even left my bar stool.

 

[Hydrak]

Doesnt your physique matter aswell? A guy who is 6'3 220 lbs walking down the street with good posture - not a lot of girls will have the confidence to stare because they feel afraid.

Like: a skinny girl who is 5'5 will try to look more with her peripheral vision because she feels dominated in his presence. Just like a lot of people will look down to the ground when a 6'7 guy walks next to them lol.

 

[Steven Hennigan]

It all depends on the girl and her personality. Just because she doesn't give you eye contact will not always mean she is not interested in you. Try saying something that matters to her, something of value to her and make her smile. She will look at you then for sure! Many woman don't even care HOW you look, they want to know you care enough to take the time and make them feel wanted and special. They can see right through you so try not to make it seem as though you want something in return or even so obvious.

 

[Jair213]

Like: a skinny girl who is 5'5 will try to look more with her peripheral vision because she feels dominated in his presence. Just like a lot of people will look down to the ground when a 6'7 guy walks next to them lol.

if the guy is that big i never look down to break the eye contact i just slightly look to the side neutrally, but never look down, never submit.

 

[Gunner26]

I agree eye contact is huge. It's probably my primary IOI when I'm talking to a girl. I can normally tell if they're into me by the way they look. There are different ways of looking at somebody, and I think I can judge them pretty well.

Some people will always look in my eyes, others never do. I bet you can guess which ones are more interested in me, yep the ones were I got a lot of eye contact.

It's also a good way to see attraction because the pupil dilates slightly when you look at something you find aesthetically pleasing. I'm pretty good at noticing when this happens now, although I see it more as a glossy sheen on the entire eye, then just then pupil itself getting larger.

Gunner

 

[SL2012]

E.g. There is a girl I find very good-looking in my boot camp conditioning gym class. I have talked to her a couple if times (On my initiation) and she was nice. HOWEVER, she NEVER looks at me when I walk by her (even when I am looking at her) and seems to TRY and AVOID looking at me as I walk by.


Funny, saw this same girl in spin class last night and she was in there with her mom.

We made eye contact after class and she was "very friendly" and asking me questions about the triathlon I did.

Women make no sense.

 

[Brosy]

when i first started at my current job, i was getting tons of IOIs, and then i found out nearly all of the females were married or in relationships, they were just looking for ego boosts

Same as, there is a hb9 (engaged) at work who none of my male colleagues can keep their eyes off of.

I however, simply dont at look at her. Occasionally I'll leave my desk to go somewhere and she'll be staring directly at me in a pretty intense way. I don't know if it's some power game to see if I lose my sh!t, or she's thinking "why don't you stare like eveyone else?" but I just stare right back like she ain't sh!t.

Clearly I am at odds her with her ego.

I know good eye contact, it's the smiling eyes or the puppy dog eyes. Anything else is "oi you, notice me"