it's about C+F, just read

[Drug_L0rd]

man, where do movie makers and sticom makers get their jokes from? some of the punchlines are classic C+F lines, and most are very original.

for example:
"i don't flirt with girls, i talk to them, is it my fault it comes out like music?"

or

girl: (laughing) if you were someone else i'd say you're coming on to me
boy: (laughs back) if you were someone else...i would

or

what's with long face? (the guy's sad) ohhh...it's the shape of your head.

or

girl: will you do me a favour
boy: yea sure, you bend over and i'll pull out the stick

there are also many other examples by normal people around even on these forums. for example check out the post on phone openers in the tips forum. how the guy taped monkey sounds and sh!t...i mean how does it even cross their mind?

what do they do? i'm in no way bad at C+F, i'm good, but i want to be BETTER. don't we all?

what is it with these people, is it that they think like a child and very juvenile and they come up with this sh!t or what.

other examples, my friends driving in their car, see a bunch of nice chicks in the car parked next to the road. the guy pulls down his window, his friend slows down the car, as they pass the girls by, the guy sticks his head out and goes "booo", the poor girl freaked and needless to say it was a very good laugh.

or my friend ordered a pizza from pizza hut and went to pick it up. the guy asked him to pay and my friend brings up his baseball cap which is filled with just coins. like 20 dollars worth. he tips the cap on the table and coin spills everywhere on the table and he starts to slowly count the money. the shopkeeper stops him half way and goes "just take the pizza and go"

or, my friend's driving and just outta boredom he starts to beep his horn every time he changes gears. he changes from first to second and beeps the horn, he changes form second to third and beeps the horn, etc.

there's so many more...but i wanna know how do they just come up with this sh!t?

 

[Smooth as Anything]

Preperation, don't turn into the ****y+funny guy on the sitcoms. Notice something about them? They are there for comic relief. Do you want to be your friend's comic relief?

 

[icallug]

whenever i do it, it usual just comes out of the blue. i dont have to think about what im going to say.

 

[Anson]

Originally posted by icallug
whenever i do it, it usual just comes out of the blue. i dont have to think about what im going to say.

That's how it should happen. Also, don't do it too often or she will begin to think that you are a man who is never to be taken seriously. More especially; if there is something she wants to talk about seriously or something that is important to her, making jokes of that can be - and is - quite insultive. Making jokes of her ALL THE TIME is also insultive, don't forget that you can just as well make jokes about your environment and sometimes even yourself, that shows that you are confident with who you are. Also, doing c+f too often will make the jokes seem lamer - especially if you practice it on one target only (i.e. ONLY make fun of her, or yourself).

Bottom line is, usually "f" alone is enough.

But C+F is good for you if used well. Some people over-do it. Don't be one of those people. Drug lord posted good examples but when you do it, you want your c+f comments to be original and they need to fit perfectly in the situation. You need to make then up real quickly and if you can't do that, if you start memorizing smart-ass jokes - seriously, don't bother.

 

[Brazilian_Blues_Boy]

LOL

I'm laughing my a$$ off here...

Well, I think that half of it is genetic... my whole family is filled with C&F people, it kind of got into my blood.

And, hanging around this people gives you more ideas... My friends used to be very funny before I "outfunnied" them...
So take what's good, adapt and see it working.

Some examples:

My friends, whenever they go to Mc Donald's, they go to the drive-thru, and try to order from there.

Myself, when the food court is full at the mall and I have noone to stay sitting on a table, I leave one shoe over it, go there, buy my food and then come back.

My friend, at McDonald's, whenever his asked if it's going to be coke or soda, he asks: "Which one is better today?"

Myself, when eating with my friends, sometimes I stop talking out of the blue and give them a punch:
" Your f*cking pig... you have to enjoy the meal !!
Then I take the thing I'm eating, soak it with coke and continue eating

Myself, when I sneeze, I end the sneeze making Donald Duck like sounds.

Whenever someone's talking to me, I stop listening to what they're saying, start to look at their faces and laugh...

To end the traditional, "Complex Comparison", for example, when I was playing pool with my bud, I told his girlfriend:

"When it comes to playing pool, your boyfriend is very polite"

and later I told his girl:

"You girl, as a bowling player, have a really nice voice"

These are meant to "not be" understood.

BBB

 

[Iv4]

First post,please go easy on me

Well CF is just plain funny from a 3rd person perspective thats why I assume it's in the sitcoms.Besides does'nt get old quit as quickly.I've found that repeated CF to the point of insults are a great negatie hit tactic.Actually the best negative hit I have is being slightly pissed/sarcastic.

 

[Drug_L0rd]

nah, but what i dont get is how do these normal, everyday people (not the sitcom actors) come up with these original funny things?

like take this other example, i did this based on what my friends did a while back, i modified it a little:

i walk into mcdonald's and step up to the counter, the girl comes up to me and she's like "yea how can i help you". i looks at her for a few seconds and slowly start talking, i say "ahh...yea, could i have a uhh...zinger burger (that's a burger from KFC not mcdonald's) with lebanese fries (if you live in sydney, you are all too familiar with lebanese people)." her friend in the counter next to her hears this and starts laughing. she starts laughing too, but wasn't showing it much because i could tell she had a hard day at work.

when she said this is mcdonald's i looked at her blankly for a while and i get a confused expression on my face, and i continue "ahh...ok then, umm what's the chicken burger got in it", the other girl starts to laugh again, she replies with "chicken, lettuce, mayo", i reply with, "ok, good so it's got chicken in it yea?" she nods. i'm laughing my a$$ off inside. i finally finish with saying, "well i dont' want any burgers just a drink for my little brother here." she says "what size would you like it?" i reply with "how much do they cost?" she said she doesn't know, i go "what do ya mean you dont know, you work here."

we finally decide and she goes to get it and while she's going i call out, "make sure there's ice in it, lots of ice. i like ice." she nods and smiles. i get the drink and go.

but see my point is, without me having heard the story about how my friends did a variation of this then i don't think it would have ever crossed my mind. or that other incident with my friend when he went to pizza hut and started to pay with coins (read the first post in this thread).

that's just funny sh!t, how do they come up with it? that's what i wanna know.

 

[JoE BoXeR]

Ah I don't think there's any surefire formula to become the witty person you're describing but I try to follow this method and I have to say it has worked for me.

1. Don't be known as a quiet guy, say anything remotely funny that pops into your head (like in class or whatever). Soon you'll find your style and know what works and what doesn't. Make sure you say it assertively too, it won't have the same affect if you say it timidly or are forced to repeat it.

2. Have a "I don't give a f*ck" attitude and you'll be surprised how often you think of clever sarcastic comments. Mind you they can be really tedious after a while but I find that when I really don't care about impressing the girl I'm with, that the most suave C+F comes out.

3. Watch lots of movies and t.v. comedies. Ya it sounds cheezy but movies and t.v. will give you some great lines to repeat and will fill your head with different ideas for different situations. ex. I was watching Wayne's World 2 and noticed how they played the guy at the drivethrough (watch it and you'll know what I mean) so I tried it a couple times and had the other people in the car with me in hysterics even though they'd seen it before, they were surprised I had the balls and brains to pull it off.

4. Listen to a lot of stand-up. Basically the same as above, but listen carefully because these are some of the world's funniest people and overall best entertainers. Everyone has the potential to be funny but these guys have harnessed this side of them and can keep audiences captivated just by saying all the stuff everyone else subconsciously thinks.

5. Don't be so f*cking serious or sensitive. Put a humouros spin on your everyday life. Know when to laugh at yourself and when to laugh at the situations you're in. The guys you admire who always have a witty remark up their sleeve have probably already been in that scenario, came up with the perfect response later and were lucky enough to get a second chance at saying their line. The best comedians just focus in on the little peculiar things in our society. If you have an IQ over 70, so can you!

6. I find the times I'm trying hard to make everyone laugh I end up saying the lamest things that I later regret. While on the other hand the funniest things I say are the jokes that at I almost don't bother saying.

7. You gotta lay your balls out there every once in a while. You won't become this witty persona if you over analyze situation and miss every opportunity to crack a joke. It won't happen overnight but the more you work on it the easier they'll come to you. Also don't be let down if your joke draws a few blank stares, move on without getting flustered and assume they didn't get it.

 

[Drug_L0rd]

thank you joe boxer, very good and eye opening.

 

[emotionlikeafuneral]

Dont copy lines, but INTERNALIZE the attitude.