It doesn't get more AFC than this...

[NewMan]

Dude - WTF?

I seem to remember posts on this and people telling you to be careful and to either Fvck the b#tch or leave her.

People told you of the many red flags.

But you still continued on this dream that you had.

You've got one-i-tis beyond comprehension.

That email was the iceing on the cake.

There were reponses to your thread and people told you you were being used. Not to pay for her sh#t.

And now your actually mad (even though you said your not) at her.

Why?

It's not her fault it's your fault.

read that again.

IT'S YOUR FAULT.

This is what happens when AFC's don't open their eyes.

All along you were saying and telling us about how great feinds you 2 were. You were friends for 4 yrs. That you could talk about everything - blah blah bah.

Now your pissed because she doesn't want to date you.

Read the bible - and take advice from the posters here.

They told you:

FVCK HER ALREADY.

Let this be a lesson to you - to stop playing little games.

Either Fvck them or Next them.

This b#tch played you like a fiddle. She used you as an emotional tampon - and you sucked up all her BS for sure.


Your young - so you'll get over it. Use it as a lesson learnt.

My advice to you is to go back and read the bible again. Start taking this sh#t seriously - because you fvcked up big time here.

Over and out.

 

[backbreaker]

You know what, I am going to agree with you, because I did make the mistake here, not her, I can't blame her for being ****ed up, but I can blame myself for dealing with someone who IS ****ed up.

However, I wouldn't say it is onetiis.

How many posts in the DJ bible do you read that says "signs that a girl wants you". what am I supposed to think when the girl comes over 3-4 times a week? What am I supposed to think when she is constantly hugging on me? What am I supposed to think when she throws hints out that she wants to get with me?

If I were to post all of the crap that she does on here, and then told you that I didn't make a move, I would get flamed just as bad, probably worse for NOT making a move..


I judged her actions, I made a calcuated move, it didn't work out. I can live with that.

However, and I will say this one more time, she isn't a slut I picked up off of the street. I don't want to date her, but I do care about her. I know it was bets for me, but it wa shard telling someone you care about that you don't want to have anything to do with them any longer

 

[frivolousz21]

I have a smiliar friend to this..except she isnt nuts....

we have been friends for 9 months...

i wanted more..atleast I got to **** her alot.

but I was the guy she used. yes we were friends..but what kind of give and take is that?


1 month ago..I stopped answering the phone..It took me 3 or 4 days of intense mind conditioning to let go..I decided to repsect myself as a man. and I changed. she noticed...she either had to leave or repsect me.

she RESPECTS ME. and now we are "real" friends.

 

[backbreaker]

thanks for the advice, but the thing is, honestly, I don't even want to be her friend... she doesn't bring anything to the table. I just care about her too much as a person to NOT be there for her. If it were up to me I wouldn't have anything to do with her any more.

 

[frivolousz21]

what do you mean you care to much?

thats bs dude.

im not trying to flame you.

but here is your problem. you are the NICE GUY..you want to help..you can swear up and down all day that is not what you are doing but yet it is.

she wont die without you.
and if she does..well thats ****ed up.

you need to MOVE ON..and go..love yourself first..this obviously bothers you. and if you keep caring..you wont become a DJ or the man you want to see in the mirror.

good luck

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Backbreaker - you sure you're not in love with this woman?

 

[backbreaker]

dude, regardless to what me and her are, friends, BF and GF. I HAVE KNOWN HER FOR THE BETTER PART OF 4 YEARS. You tend to care about people that you know for that long. It wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't so damn unstable.

In otherwords, right now I don't care if she thinks I am a "nice guy", I'm not interested.

The ironic part is, the day after this, I meet someone else that I really think that something is there. She likes me, without question, and we have slept togther a handfulf of times already, so I guess you don't chace them, you replace them.

 

[backbreaker]

Originally posted by Don Juanabbe
Backbreaker - you sure you're not in love with this woman?

dude, i wouldn't touch this girl with a 10 foot pole

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Good man. Sounds like you've come through this as a learning experience.

 

[NewMan]

You can care about her - love her etc. whatever - but that doesn't mean she has to be a part of your everyday life.

She wants you there because your like a GF to her. You listen to her problems and you always help her out.

You are nice.

You are reliable.

You will be there for her.

Yes - and guess what - that does not make womens panties wet.


So - what I suggest you do, is man up - care about her from a distance - and let her go. Move on. Cut it off.

***
dude, regardless to what me and her are, friends, BF and GF. I HAVE KNOWN HER FOR THE BETTER PART OF 4 YE
***

Yeah - but for 2 yrs there she forgot about you when she was fvcking her crazt BF.

Friendship needs to be both ways.

This has and will always be one way - her way.


***
However, I wouldn't say it is onetiis.
***

Call it whatever you need to call it to make yourself feel better.

When one guy has been pining after a chick for 4 yrs. and has NEVER made a move on her - I'll call it One-I-tis.

Your sending her meails telling her how you feel - what she's done to you.

Your clasping at straws.

If it wasn't One-I-tis - you wouldn't be "crying" over split milk so much (not literally - or maybe you have? who knows).

***
what am I supposed to think when the girl comes over 3-4 times a week? What am I supposed to think when she is constantly hugging on me? What am I supposed to think when she throws hints out that she wants to get with me?
***

Your supposed to put your tongue down her throat and your C@ck in her pvssy.

You don't play silly games - you come out with guns a blazing.


****
One night, I was out at a bar, and she called me. Joking around, I told her I really wanted to talk to her once I left. I guess she thought I really had something to tell her, so she called me back later, at least 2 in the morning, and was begging to hear what I had to say. I started to think she was expecting me to tell her osmething, and when I say something, I mean that I like her, but I wouldn't. So I play along, and say, "you know what I am going to tell you, why do you want me to say it?". She says "because I just do". So we play this game off and on for around a week and a half
****

This is painful to read.

It's the kind of thing you should read in the high school forum.

Your getting mad now because she wants to be friends - when it's your fault. You had a chance - a long time ago - to make your play:

***
the last one at my house after visitng hours. we were on my couch watching some movie on HBO and after a while we were practically in each others arms, I was rubbing my hand on her thigh, then when I got up to mix me another drink she gave me this "where are you going" look which I thought was too cute. I have a good idea what she wanted, but I wasn't going to do that, out of respect for her BF..
****

You set the tone right there and then.

You could have made the move - and you probably would have ended up fvcking her.

This was your 1st post.

It would have been over right there - or you would still probably been fvcking her.


BUT YOU ARE TO MUCH OF A NICE GUY.


And now your moaning about her just wanting to be friends.


I'm not trying to be an a## here - but I'm just trying to point things out.

 

[backbreaker]

Yes I am a nice person, I am not going to be a **** just to sleep with someone. I have female friends, enough of them where I am not desperate for anyone, no matter how hot I think she is. I respect myself too much to play thoose types of games. Think about it... do you really want to bang someone you had to decieve to get?

[I}
So - what I suggest you do, is man up - care about her from a distance - and let her go. Move on. Cut it off.
[/I]

humm... I think that's what I already said I did. And this didn't happen recently.. This was around 2, 2 and a half weeks ago, I am just now posting this becuase some people were curious to how it played out.


Yeah - but for 2 yrs there she forgot about you when she was fvcking her crazt BF.

Friendship needs to be both ways.

This has and will always be one way - her way.


No arguments here, you got me and you are 100% right, which is why I decided to leave her alone. Why spend so much time with her, talkign to her when I could be having sex wtih the other 4-5 girls I see on a semi-constant basis?



I never said I didn't make a move on her. We've kissed. We've kissed a couple of times. We damn near had sex one night, which makes it more confusing.

As far as me sending her emails, I usually don't but a) I really didn't want to talk to her and b)I was responding to 2 emails she had sent me.

Are you reading my posts? Not one time did I say I was mad at her, becuase I am not. However, I am just not going to waste my time on her anymore. Not mad, not upset, not anything.

Hell, the only reason I am responding to this post is because 3 peole asked me to, I had forgotten about it. Like i said, I have more interesting prospects as of now.

 

[frivolousz21]

I realize that you are directly involved. This is why you cannot see what we see.

you say 4 yrs..so what? thats part of life..people are married for 10 oor 15 or 20....and they split and dont talk for yrs.


come on man

 

[backbreaker]

I'm loyal to people who depend on me, friend, GF, mom, employee, whoever.

As ****ed up in the head I think she is, she does depend on me to some extent, I just can't turn my bank on her like that, but I can and have stopped having a romantic interest in her.

 

[frivolousz21]

ok you just crossed the line with the word depend.


she has no relation to you.

the problem is...

she isnt depending on you for something in exchange

i depend on my friends for fun and comfert and laughs.

and they give it back to me.

i go to valvoline for an oil change...i depend on it.

they give it to me

I give them 25 bucks.

i give a female attention..she give me *****!



what does she give u?

 

[backbreaker]

that's actually pretty funny...

I am not saying you are not right, but I am not completely wrong either.

 

[willtmail]

Ironic title

Backbreaker, you keep saying how you don't really care about this girl in THAT way. I find that hard to believe. This thread has been around for a good month and each time you make an "update," it is to say that nothing has happened and to reiterate to us (probably to yourself too) that "you don't like her that way."

Newman, among many others, has pointed out your mistakes. This IS ONEITIS. You are thinking about her constantly. You remember exactly what she says, when she calls you, what you were doing at the time - that is oneitis. Believe me, I've been there. Most, if not all, of us have been there. You need to call it what it is and move on.

It's ironic that you called this thread "It doesn't get more AFC than this..." in an attempt to lampoon the boyfriend. If you read the thread through another lens, you might be inclined to see that there is more than one AFC in this story.

That said, don't take it personally. I happen to agree with the guys on here who said that you should have ****ed her early on. You chose not to - a decision that you are entitled to make. However, because of that decision, you haven't really gotten anything out of this back-and-forth, while she's gotten free loans (for a day), seed-money for her business, etc. She may not have reconnected with you for the favors (although I think she did - you said yourself in your email to her that you weren't really " friends"), but your actions led her to believe that she could milk you. And milk she did.

In addition, you seem to overcompensate a lot. For example, you like to keep telling us that you are NOT interested in her that way and that you have other women that you are after. Why, then, are we reading three pages of updates regarding this girl you're just "friends" with? Another example is in your email to the girl - you keep saying that you're not mad. If you weren't mad, why did you bother to write her that email?

Of course, I could be entirely wrong, and I'm sure you are going to stick to your guns on most of these points, but I just wanted to let you know what I thought (hey, you put it up on this board for comments).

My advice (if you want it): just cut her off completely. You said yourself she wasn't a friend to begin with and she hasn't proved that she is friend material. I would say that the only reason you are still talking to her is because you DO like her THAT way. Think about it: would you let a dude or a UG treat you this way?

Good luck, backbreaker.

 

[backbreaker]

god damnit, how many times are people going to repeat what i have already said i have done!!!!!!!


a) The only reason I keep saying I am not interested in her like that, is because people keep telling me I am.

b) The only reason I updated this was because people ASKED me to, like I said this happened around 2, 2 and a half weeks ago, I havent' talked to her sense, dont' want to talk to her, and I hope she doesn't try to contact me anytime soon.

c) Either I go after a girl that throws out signs, get rejected and I have onenitis, or I don't go after her, post what I DIDN't do, and I am a chump. You decide. I mean, what am I supposed to think when a girl comes over my house at 10 at night, and we kiss for half an hour? That she doesn't like me?Tell me how much sense that makes...

d)Yes I should have cut her off along time ago, abot the only thing I agree with you on

 

[willtmail]

Overcompensation

OK, there's no need to get all *crazy* with the fonts... you put this up here for us to discuss.

First, this is a moot point. I don't know if I'm just playing with semantics, but as I was reading through the posts, it was clear to me that you LIKED HER THAT WAY. You may not anymore now, but it will be almost impossible to convince me (at least) that you were not chasing/interested in her.

Second, that is good that you aren't talking about her. It is also good that you aren't talking to her. I'm sorry if I was being repetitive, I have a tendency not to read the dates - that is my fault. However, you did post this with at least one negative intention: you wanted us to laugh with you at this drug addict who was losing his gf to mr.smooth (you). I am not sure if you posted this for advice on how to react/approach/****, but you definitely wanted to slam the dude. Which leads me to my third point:

Third, there are ways you can come out not being a chump. First, you can go after a girl, get rejected, and then forget about her - i.e. not post about her. Or, you can not go after her, and again, not post about her. If she really is not that important to you, why are you wasting your (apparently) precious time writing about her?

You are right. She was being stupid. Or extremely smart - have you seriously considered the option that you were being used for your money? You said yourself that you are quite famous in your state. Fame attracts golddiggers like **** attracts flies. I'd kiss a girl for some easy money. I can act like I'm interested in someone for some easy money.

Finally, it's great that you cut her off. This should be done with.

Cheers

 

[frivolousz21]

YEEAAAAHHHHH

 

[NewMan]

Alright.

Done deal.

You cut her off and now your not interested in her.

Please - don't take these post's and replies personally.

We are not here to just give you sh#t.

But I think many people observed that you were into her - and the post's just kept going on and on about how she's calling you and how she's interested in you and about her Bf etc. etc. without any real conclusion.

Points made. It's done.

Let's move forward.