Alpha Male
Don Juan
hehe I don't deny that alotta guys give bad adviceOriginally posted by Wyldfire
lol...I've seen several women here give very good advice and I've seen lots of guys give lousy advice. I prefer my way of judging things.
It does NOT help you improve YOURSELF to whine about girls
- Thread starter Wyldfire
- Start date
Well I for one want to hear about the BS other guys are experiencing from women. Wyldfire claims we have to improve ourselves's well the best way to do that is to see the way women respond to various guys' techniques'. Besides no one really knows what women will consider "improvement"or exactly what women want, women don't even know. The fact is women respond to games and play games. It's impossible to talk about women without talking about the games they play. And it is all women's fault, I can logically prove but I won't.
For starters if you put more effort into focusing on what YOU want instead of trying to be what you think women (or anyone, for that matter) want it would be a good start. One of the most attractive traits a person can have is to be self assured about who they are and where they are going. Guys who only blame and complain just wander around aimlessly, never improving themselves. And talking about experiences with women is not what I'm talking about. I am talking about the incessant blubbering, whining and carrying on about everything being the fault of women. Honestly, if you were as blame free as you think you'd have no time to post on here because there would be a line of women at your door beating it down to bask in your glow of perfection. Come back down to earth and learn something by admitting that you have always played a significant role in your own misery. If you can't do that then all you are is a perpetual victim. Victims don't overcome anything, but survivors do. To be a survivor you MUST acknowledge the role you play in your own suffering. There is NO other way.
tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Isn't it good to point out that THERE ARE types of girls to stay away from, such as AWs .. WHICH DO EXIST?? Especially Midwest's case, as these girls will be clearly having him pointing a gun at his head faster than you can recite the 12 step program?
If you would have read all the posts you would have seen early on that he was given good advice not only by me but by others and it had nothing to do with her, but more with himself!
Yes .. alot do come on here and biatch and complain but you're branding everyone as losers with girls otherwise they wouldn't be here .. to which you are wrong.
Alot of posters here are good and decent guys looking for good and decent girls, just currently single and we all know that finding someone 'decent' is getting that much more harder as time goes on.
Alot of these guys have also been in bad relationships where they were 'nice guys' walking on eggshells trying to make relationships work with selfish girls that have deep-seeded issues, insecurities and hangups.
Part of the healing is knowing what types to avoid and what types to get with.
If you would have read all the posts you would have seen early on that he was given good advice not only by me but by others and it had nothing to do with her, but more with himself!
Yes .. alot do come on here and biatch and complain but you're branding everyone as losers with girls otherwise they wouldn't be here .. to which you are wrong.
Alot of posters here are good and decent guys looking for good and decent girls, just currently single and we all know that finding someone 'decent' is getting that much more harder as time goes on.
Alot of these guys have also been in bad relationships where they were 'nice guys' walking on eggshells trying to make relationships work with selfish girls that have deep-seeded issues, insecurities and hangups.
Part of the healing is knowing what types to avoid and what types to get with.
Again...the girl/girls discussed on this site are irrelevent. And if a guy focuses on himself as he SHOULD be then he will mature, grow and will simply NOT be interested in women who aren't worth his time. Anyone who has to include some generalized negative and bitter comment blaming girls for all the woes of men is NEVER going to succeed with women because his focus is on the wrong thing. Period.
tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Yeahp that is true, but again .. knowing what types to avoid is a big part to finding the right types.
There is a typical pattern which an AW exhibits .. and the references i made in the Midwest thread was telling him that she could be this .. don't talk to her anymore because she isn't worth the time etc. It was not bashing her personally, she just seemed to exhibit the character of an AW.
Now for Midwest, yeah he way overplayed and has some obvious issues, but he is so inexperienced, and now he knows.
I think every guy that goes out there no matter how confident etc. he is - has to be able to identify types of girls .. and the same goes for women in terms of identifying players .. that is if their decent and want a good/solid LTR with a good guy. Make sense? It should.
Some of us don't have the good fortune of coming from Brady Bunch like families so we have to find our own way. Now you'll probably tell me that no one has this type of family and every family has problems .. yes that they do .. but growing up in families with good parents loving towards each other can serve as a good model for knowing what good relationships are all about.
There is a typical pattern which an AW exhibits .. and the references i made in the Midwest thread was telling him that she could be this .. don't talk to her anymore because she isn't worth the time etc. It was not bashing her personally, she just seemed to exhibit the character of an AW.
Now for Midwest, yeah he way overplayed and has some obvious issues, but he is so inexperienced, and now he knows.
I think every guy that goes out there no matter how confident etc. he is - has to be able to identify types of girls .. and the same goes for women in terms of identifying players .. that is if their decent and want a good/solid LTR with a good guy. Make sense? It should.
Some of us don't have the good fortune of coming from Brady Bunch like families so we have to find our own way. Now you'll probably tell me that no one has this type of family and every family has problems .. yes that they do .. but growing up in families with good parents loving towards each other can serve as a good model for knowing what good relationships are all about.
cant think of a user name
Master Don Juan
One should not blame anyone for the woes of anything, because, fundamentally, there is something wrong with the world we live in. It's kind of fvcked up.........................................
However that is not to say one should abandon all hope and not fulfil their goals, because we all have a limited time on this earth and we should probably make the most of it right? So depressing. So off-topic.
You do realize that everytime you post on this particular subject that you start off with the right attitude in the first sentence and then ruin it with all the "buts", don't you? You keep having to go back to making it about what is wrong/bad about girls. My whole point is that doing that does NOT benefit you in any way. Until you can objectively look at a post on this forum without feeling compelled to focus on the girl rather than the guy you will NOT make progress. You need to get a grip on this bad habit if you ever want to make real progress.
The only real problem with the world is that most of the people in it are looking to other people and things to fulfill them and make them happy. The secret to happiness in life is to understand that each of us have the CHOICE to be happy or to be unhappy. We all have the power to make that choice and too many people mistakenly give that power to others or simply don't utilize it. This is true of all the guys who come here because they looked to some girl they liked to fulfill them and make them happy. When the girl rejected them they were devastated and crushed. Rejection ONLY crushes a person who looks to others to fulfil them and make them happy. When you look ONLY to yourself for those things then you put yourself in control of your own happiness. It is a choice.
HeimdallThorhammer
Don Juan
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Tell me you're cute, young in spirit, ambitious and live close by...
High Voltage
Don Juan
Before submitting this reply I attempted to come up with a definition of whining as opposed to ranting/venting. I decided to define whining as a way to make up excuses in order to *prevent* you from taking action. In this sense, whining is indeed not helpful. You take no action and nothing changes.
However, it is important to contrast this with venting. Venting is helpful and useful. It helps us get past the negative feelings we have and extract the lessons learned.
It is okay to vent.
It is okay to be angry.
It is okay to be bitter.
It is okay to be a misogynistic.
Just not all the time.
This is a forum where guys learn how to pick up chicks. The key word here is *learn*. We're not all perfect so we're going to get frustrated, make mistakes, encounter setbacks. And lets face it, plenty of chicks are just downright b1tches.
Given the pvssified nature of most men, who can we vent to? People who will understand us - and there is no better place than the DJ forum, where we all share common viewpoints (mostly).
In conclusion:
Whine: No!
Vent: Yes!
- HV
However, it is important to contrast this with venting. Venting is helpful and useful. It helps us get past the negative feelings we have and extract the lessons learned.
It is okay to vent.
It is okay to be angry.
It is okay to be bitter.
It is okay to be a misogynistic.
Just not all the time.
This is a forum where guys learn how to pick up chicks. The key word here is *learn*. We're not all perfect so we're going to get frustrated, make mistakes, encounter setbacks. And lets face it, plenty of chicks are just downright b1tches.
Given the pvssified nature of most men, who can we vent to? People who will understand us - and there is no better place than the DJ forum, where we all share common viewpoints (mostly).
In conclusion:
Whine: No!
Vent: Yes!
- HV
Alpha Male
Don Juan
Wyldfire, you seem to take great pleasure in de-sexualising yourself on a forum which revolves around gender. I find this a fascinating paradoxOriginally posted by Wyldfire
Irrelevent.
tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Thanks .. i'll keep that in mind
Good post Wyldfire.
I've been reading alot of business books that suggest the same strange.
Accept that your world is as exactly as you have created it. We can't necessarily change others, so let's focus on what we can do.
The easiest thing to do when you encounter a girl that isn't good is to get out of it. There are plenty of others.
How many women and men both stay in crappy relationships? Tons of them. It is a comfort factor.
I've been reading alot of business books that suggest the same strange.
Accept that your world is as exactly as you have created it. We can't necessarily change others, so let's focus on what we can do.
The easiest thing to do when you encounter a girl that isn't good is to get out of it. There are plenty of others.
How many women and men both stay in crappy relationships? Tons of them. It is a comfort factor.
On most days I do smell something...but I can't say I'd call it "power"...hehe.
Although I come across as a bit of a hard-a$$ed biotch at time...I AM here to help. You guys miss a lot of things that are just so blatantly obvious to me...and I'm not gonna lie to you. I'll be blunt, honest, and to the point. Some of what I have to say can be scathing and quite unpopular, but you can always count on me telling you EXACTLY what I see.
Yeah, well I'm a real "study of contrasts"...rather fascinating in some ways. I honestly just want to be treated like "one of the guys" on here. My only purpose for posting here is to help. Of course, there are times when I'm feeling kinda snarky and like to joke around and when attacked I'm meaner than a gut-shot momma grizzly protecting her cubs. But I don't have any alterior motives for being here.Originally posted by Alpha Male
Wyldfire, you seem to take great pleasure in de-sexualising yourself on a forum which revolves around gender. I find this a fascinating paradox
Someone who needs to vent should vent...but he should also be looking at the role he played in his own problems. The people giving him advice should lead him in that direction so he can actually fix what he's doing wrong. The worst thing anyone can do when giving advice is to encourage someone to keep feeling sorry for themselves or blame the girl, thereby totally ignoring their part in it. If they don't acknowledge their mistakes they won't change them. The kindest thing you can do, as advisors, is to lead the person into the quickest and most effective direction. Wasting 3 or 4 pages biotching and complaining about a girl isn't helpful or productive.