Is this girl feeling it.

[Early DJ]

Need some help with this girl.

This is my first post and it is a long one, but it all ties in together.

Ok, so here is the story. Last week I was out with a couple of friends and a girl at a bar. friend 1 has been kind of chasing the girl for the last two years with no luck.

Here is a quick background about the people.

friend 1: I have known him for about 10 years and we were best buddies up until a couple of years ago when he started to be indifferent to the friendship. Anyways we started to hang out again last year, but now I just put him on the list of acquaintances since in my opinion "best friends" or what I though we were dont do this. These days he thinks that he is a supper DJ and acts like an ass hole to many people for no reason, but I have only seen him with a few girls through out the years yet he says he has like 3 or more dates a week.

friend 2: he is a good friend

girl: I have known her for about a year, but just when she was hanging out with friend 1 and have only seen her probably 20 times during that time, and we never really talked.

Here is the rest of the story. As we were sitting at the bar I sat next to the girl and I am far from being a DJ I rarely talk to random girls because of lack of being able to start a conversation. So as we sit I am being very quiet and the girl asks me why I was so quiet, I just told her that I did not really know, but it was probably because I could not pick up on the conversation that was going on or relate to it. Some more time passes and after a few beers nothing changes, but all of a sudden a conversation has sprung between me and the girl and it gets really intense to the point that all I could hear is her. We laugh and relate and blah blah blah.

The next day I go with the same people plus a few more to another bar and I was the first to enter the seating area and the girl sat next to me. We talk a little with everybody and I talk with the girl about random things here and there. At some point I speak of a movie to her and she says she has not seen it and I advise her to watch it so she tries to make plans of me and friend 1 to go to her house the next day and just hang out at which point I tell her that I have that movie and we could watch it and she asked me for my number and then gave me hers . Slightly before that friend 1 started to be an ass hole to the girl and she asked him why and he replied that he was just kidding and we all left it at that.

I got busy the next day and never called or texted her and neither did she.

The next day I went over to friend 1's house and chilled over there for a little and then I saw friend 2. He asked me what I did prior to that and a conversation sprung between us about how he did not admire friend 1 at all, but mainly for this reason: apparently friend 1 was talking **** about me and I was like when? So apparently during my conversation with the girl the first night ( I was not trying to get her or anything we were just talking) my friend 1 was saying to friend 2, look at him he thinks he has a chanche, but he really does not he is a fool and all this went on for quite a while even though friend 2 tried to steer the conversation somewhere else friend 1 kept talking ****. Which I did not hear until friend 2 told me about it. This made a whole different perception of friend 1 to me, but since we share some other friends together I decided to let it go since like I said he is nothing more then an acquaintance at the moment.

Here is the good part. The next day the girl texts me and said that friend 1 is having a get together and seeing if I wanted to come ( friend 1 never said anything to me about this). I said to her that I got plans with other people and I did and also because I never got invited by the "host". She asked me what I was doing and I said I was going to a bar which was the plan. So then I come home from the bar and right after I step into the door she I get a text from her saying "the party is really boring what are you doing?" since I was already in I just texted her saying that I was really tired and just came home but what are you doing the rest of the week. She replied "thats cool I dont have any finals till next week and have no plans for the entire week" I replied saying "I have no exams till next week" at which point she replied "ok awesome. well I am free whenever just let me know if you want to do anything".

Today I invited her to go out, but she had to meet with somebody to study but she will let me know if anything changes and then we shared a few texts back and fourth about random stuff.

What do you guys think about this situation? Any comments are greatly appreciated.

 

[DJ_Tekinkel]

Sounds to me
Friend 1 is jealous the girls is going for YOU over HIM(cause he thinks hes so awesome), and is a total douchebag and not a real friend. I probably wouldnt hang with him. Thats why he invited her out and not you, to try win her over for his ego.
Friend 2 sounds like a better person.

Girl: Shes interested in you and clearly has interest in you since your on her mind (texting you while at Friend 1 part) sitting next to you at the table, asking why you are quiet(if she didnt care she wouldnt ask) and making a general effort to talk and be with you.

So basically keep doing what your doing, you brushging her off(unintentionally by being busy) is raising her interest too.

Dont act AFC and you got it just dont be a jerk like Friend1

Edited!

 

[Early DJ]

Alright sweet those were my thoughts exactly every bit of what you said.

 

[Early DJ]

Ok so I have not heard from this girl since I invited her to go out. Should I try to invite her again? I have kind of played the NC test since then, what are your guys thoughts on this?

 

[Mr. Bond]

Sounds like she's semi-interested. Stop texting her unless it's to schedule something. Texts like "i'm bored, what are you doing?" are ones I just ignore.

 

[Tazman]

You made an offer that she turned down without a counter offer, so I would wait for her to call and mention hanging out. Don't contact her or set anything up unless she suggests it and is going to be available.

 

[Early DJ]

OK so it has been nothing but texts going back and fourth, I never officially invited her to do anything and neither did she, but she does seem to be interested since she replies to every text and tries to relate to whatever I send. She asked me what I was doing yesterday and I said I was going out and asked her what she was doing, to which she just replied that she was staying at some since it was really late. Any thoughts on how to deal with this or anything, I expected this forum to be a little more active.

 

[Early DJ]

Any suggestions at all?

 

[Early DJ]

No no, I am relaxed, its just weird that no one really responds to the thread and it goes closer to death until I start it up. I know its not a hot topic by any means since its personal, but come on help a guy out lol. Its just a tricky situation so dont want to ruin it, I just want some pointers on what to do next and stuff. What do you mean by not being so accessible, not replying to her texts? And the three strike rule being her canceling or denying an invitation? Also here is some information about the texts, if I text her then she responds within 20 min or so and it has been like this since the start, I do the same and sometimes take longer to respond. She started to text me initially slightly more then I did and then it kind of evened out on who texts first. I had a girlfriend before and now that I look back I was wack, but better now at the whole girl thing I guess. I finally see why its called a game lol. Its exam week so everyone is busy here except me because I only have two while everyone else has like 5 so that could be it on the going out part. And again I just want some suggestions on what I am doing right or wrong. Thank you all that responded.

 

[flint]

Hey man, I mean straight up I didn't notice anyone mention this yet which is suprising. The biggest thing that jumped out at me was that you've known this chick for a year. Granted you said you've seen her 20 times, but 20 times is still a lot considering.

I come from the thought process that your first impression with a girl is of IMMENSE importance. Sure many people on this forum like to ask things like "Wah how to I get her from a friend to a lover". Truth is it's nearly impossible, true you can do it but you've got to almost literally change your entire personality/way of life to do something like that.

You've known this chick for a year and you just got her number or something the other day, that jumps at me as a bad sign period. Your friend 1 sounds to me like he's already lost with this girl but thinks that since she hangs out with him still he's got a chance. He doesn't sound like any kind of DJ to me, especially if he's getting jelous of you. DJ's don't get jelous, they don't have any reason to be, other people get jelous of them.

Overall I think this is the situation you're on track to become friendzoned in my opinion unless you do something big in the next week/week and a half. Yes shes offering to meet up with you but that doesn't mean she's into you, she could juse be curious. I know girls who would meet up with me too who aren't necissarily into me. I think you've got literally 1 chance with this chick if you meet up with her to create attraction. Go get drinks/do something with her alone, have a great time and let your confidence ooz out. She's got to see you as attractive the next time you see her. That doesn't mean you need to f close, but even a kiss close/heavy kino, you've gota start workin.

And straight up if you get a chance/think you can kiss close her just go for it. If she denies you then good you don't need to waste anymore time on her, and if she goes for it she thinks you're confident enough to go for it and that's attractive.

Last thing I should mention too is when you go out with her don't go out thinking "Okay this is my one chance" cause you'll blow it. This is a chick man, if she flakes/you don't have a good time then NEXT. Always another one. Go out, qualify her and see if you're having a good time, if not then you're the prize move on.

 

[Early DJ]

Well it has been 20 times or so, but we never talked much or at all really, I guess she aware of my existance and slightly more. But I definately see where you are going with what you said though.