Is this consistent with possible BPD?

[JCballin88]

Hey guys,

So I've seen a number of threads with other fellas suffering from dealing with chicks who are BPD...admittedly I didn't think much of it because I had never really experienced a girl who had those issues.

Until now (maybe).

Anyways, this one girl I've gotten somewhat close to is really driving me nuts at times. Disturbing trends I've noticed:

- Generally in person she seems to be okay...but when we text, we'll be having a fun, flirty conversation and then she'll ask me some kind of BS question and when I dance around it or become ****y/funny, she just shuts down. Like we'll go from flirting to her using one-word, completely uninterested replies.

- She always assumes the worst. She is always insinuating that I talk to a bunch of girls...if I don't text her back within a certain timeframe, she'll say things like "well I hope your date is going well, goodnight." Even just tonight I was making a complex dinner for myself, and I heard my phone go off but didn't check it for a couple minutes. It was her wishing me goodnight (at 8:30pm cuz she was pissed for some reason), and then when I didn't reply immediately she went "...or not"

-Several times she has sent me long-winded messages basically accusing me of only talking to her to try and "get some" and she gets all upset. I've tried several different angles of reply...and whether or not she likes it, she always comes back the next day with stuff like "I miss you..."

She did tell me that she is very defensive and has been hurt in bad relationships before...and that she does have mood swings sometimes. I know the easy answer is to cut the cord and run...but...is there any way to figure this one out? Does it sound like possible BPD?

 

[horaholic]

Not even close to BPD behaviour. Thats pretty normal chick behaviour, if you ask me.

 

[st_99]

Hard to say, borderlines are normally a lot more evil and have a darker side than your run of the mill chick acting bratty and dramatic.

Like, she'll f*ck your best friend and couldn't care less about what you think..thats more of what a BPD is capable of. So, need more info.

Although when a girl overtly gives up bad info about herself "i have mood swings", she is making it known she is f*cked up.
Thats a red flag so basically, don't catch any feelings over her, just bang her, see where it goes.. thats all.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Very high probability that she's BPD. She shows many of the necessary underpinnings.

Even if she doesn't have a full-blown case, she still sounds dangerous.

 

[5string]

Not even close to BPD behaviour. Thats pretty normal chick behaviour, if you ask me.

Agree^^^^^

 

[Iceberg]

Hey guys,

So I've seen a number of threads with other fellas suffering from dealing with chicks who are BPD...admittedly I didn't think much of it because I had never really experienced a girl who had those issues.

Until now (maybe).

I don't know if she's BPD. But I know that most girls who are worth your time won't be doing weird sh!t like that.

The constant accusations of cheating, weird texts, all that crap......that's not "normal". If she's not BPD, she's just a freakin weirdo. Either way, keep your guard up.

 

[AlexDP]

Hey guys,

So I've seen a number of threads with other fellas suffering from dealing with chicks who are BPD...admittedly I didn't think much of it because I had never really experienced a girl who had those issues.

Until now (maybe).

Anyways, this one girl I've gotten somewhat close to is really driving me nuts at times. Disturbing trends I've noticed:

- Generally in person she seems to be okay...but when we text, we'll be having a fun, flirty conversation and then she'll ask me some kind of BS question and when I dance around it or become ****y/funny, she just shuts down. Like we'll go from flirting to her using one-word, completely uninterested replies.

- She always assumes the worst. She is always insinuating that I talk to a bunch of girls...if I don't text her back within a certain timeframe, she'll say things like "well I hope your date is going well, goodnight." Even just tonight I was making a complex dinner for myself, and I heard my phone go off but didn't check it for a couple minutes. It was her wishing me goodnight (at 8:30pm cuz she was pissed for some reason), and then when I didn't reply immediately she went "...or not"

-Several times she has sent me long-winded messages basically accusing me of only talking to her to try and "get some" and she gets all upset. I've tried several different angles of reply...and whether or not she likes it, she always comes back the next day with stuff like "I miss you..."

She did tell me that she is very defensive and has been hurt in bad relationships before...and that she does have mood swings sometimes. I know the easy answer is to cut the cord and run...but...is there any way to figure this one out? Does it sound like possible BPD?

Depends. For how long do you know her? Usually it begins with an idealization phase. They build you up before they break you down. Doesn't really seem to be case here though. Also, BPD girls are very graphic about several exes and will tell you stuff about them in detail. Whether it's true or not didn't matter, but BPD girls need to be victims. Object constancy issues could be the cause of her breaking down over text messages.

Overall: BPD? Possibly. Not likely. Worth your time? No.

 

[JCballin88]

Yeah I'm not really sure...we've been hanging out/hooking up since November...at the time I was spinning another plate but that one has kinda fallen to the wayside. The issue now is that I moved out-of-state so now our talks are all long-distance. All signs point to me needing to cut and run but I really started feeling good about this one....grrr

 

[floydb25]

No... This is typical women crazy... Not bat**** crazy. All women do this kind of stuff. Except the really mature and intelligent ones.

 

[ilikecharlene]

Most people have illnesses in some form, whether hypertension, diabetes, etc. Most of these persons are married, or in some kind of relationship.

I think like with any illness, as long as it's managed, then I don't see an issue. Even then, one gets people in wheelchairs, even people with HIV/AIDS getting in relationships, so illness is absolute bar. If a woman had bi-polar, but it was not controlled, then sorry I wouldn't hit it lol... it's too much hassle/worry.

Oh, and the world's fattest man, who is bed-ridden due to being so big, got married a few years ago. As said, illness is no absolute bar. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/10/02/manuel-uribe-worlds-heavi_n_131205.html