Is this a legit blowoff?

[WCS14]

Was supposed to have 4th date with girl tonight.

She sends me long text that she did not get any sleep last night and was having chest pains due to stress at work and she needs to go home and go to bed.

She said "please don't think I am just blowing you off" but she did not say, I would still like to see you or lets reschedule.

What do you think?

 

[DonJuanit0]

Was supposed to have 4th date with girl tonight.

She sends me long text that she did not get any sleep last night and was having chest pains due to stress at work and she needs to go home and go to bed.

She said "please don't think I am just blowing you off" but she did not say, I would still like to see you or lets reschedule.

What do you think?

No one can give you an answer! Have you two done anything yet? Her words mean nothing, judge the actions, not the words!

Just go a bit no contact and wait for her to send you something for going out again!

 

[GS750]

Meh, I'd wait a few days and call her up, set up a date. If she gives excuses as to why she can't get together then drop it.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Everybody gets one

Sometimes - but rarely - these excuses are legit. Especially something where the excuse is pain, I might let it go. But only once. And even then... if she's the one that hit you up to break it off, she's also the one that can hit you up when she's better and wants to reschedule. The fact that she didn't mention a counter-offer day and/or time is bad, but there's the small chance she wants to wait until the pain goes away (which could be that day or in a few days if it's a legit pain that needs to be looked at by a doctor). Either way, I'd simply say "okay, hit me up when you feel better" and leave it alone - I got other options I can link up with anyway so this ONE particular situation wouldn't bug me.

 

[rascal99v]

You should tell her to go see a doctor about the chest pain.

She still has interest in you, but you are the back up guy. You got blown off because she had somebody else more important to go out with. Chicks always will blow you off the day of a date. Usually a couple of hours before. They text you because they are lying to you. Why don't you have a back up chick that you can go out with? You should always have one ready to go in these situations. Wait for her to get back in touch for another date. That's assuming you still want to go out with her.

If you're curious to know, you should try this. It's a beta type move, but it can work. My friend did this last week. Call the chick up on a private number an hour after your date was supposed to happen. See if she picks up but don't say anything if she does. You can tell if she is out doing something or sick like she says, if it's quiet on the other line. My friend had a chick text him that she was home sick with the flu. He called her up later and there was loud music and noise in the background. She was out having fun. She made a miraculous recovery in just 2 hours.

You don't even need to do that because you should already know the answer. But you will find out the truth for sure.

 

[VladPatton]

Too soon to call büllṣhit, and she definitely wants to reschedule. Sounds legit (for now). Don't give up, hit her up in a few days.

 

[the_stig]

If you're curious to know, you should try this. It's a beta type move, but it can work. My friend did this last week. Call the chick up on a private number an hour after your date was supposed to happen. See if she picks up but don't say anything if she does. You can tell if she is out doing something or sick like she says, if it's quiet on the other line. My friend had a chick text him that she was home sick with the flu. He called her up later and there was loud music and noise in the background. She was out having fun. She made a miraculous recovery in just 2 hours.

You don't even need to do that because you should already know the answer. But you will find out the truth for sure.

I had a Tinder chick flake on me a few weeks ago, said she had made a last minute trip down to Florida and would be back the following day. I check her Tinder and as expected, her location was still 5 miles away and she had just been active.

BUSTED! :crackup:

 

[May_Day]

Went out on a long date with a girl yesterday; our 3rd date.

1st date ends I get a hug

2nd date ends I walk her to her car--I get a 1.5 second kiss on the lips

3rd Date I pick her up at her Step Dad's and Mom's house.

Date ends I drop her off on street in front of house and what do I get?

A half kiss (the kind you give a relative--part cheek and part lip). We were still in the car; I did not walk her up to door.

Now in her defense, maybe she felt awkward making out in a car in front of her parents house on the street(it was 9pm)

The dates seem to go fairly well with her asking a lot of questions too.

When we text she always uses emoticons and gives me detailed responses.

However, she has not layed a hand of me on any of the dates (e.g, an arm touch, knee touch, etc). where I have to her on a limited basis.

Based on this information from your previous thread I would have to say she flaked on you bro. Three dates with no making out or even coming close to having sex is no bureno. My guess is that she thinks you're a nice guy, but she isn't really attracted to you. Girls that want you will be all over you and you haven't come close to anything. Do what the other guy says and wait till she hits you up. Even if she does I don't see this going anywhere. She's not the only fish in the sea. Happy Fishing

 

[nismo-4]

I'm betting on your princess is in another castle.

3 dates with this girl and no makeout? Wake your ass up! She's not that interested. If a woman wanted to be taken by you, she would make it known. She wouldn't reject your advances, and a flake (via text at that) with no counteroffer is never good.

She has chest pains because she was getting her body passionately bitten and beaten by a better man. Gee, I wonder why she didn't get any sleep last night! Oh yeah, she was getting her vagina ripped apart.

Dude, she's making you wait. A woman who makes you wait to get physical wants you as a beta orbiter. She said not to think it's a blowoff, but I'm sorry dude, it is a blowoff. These other posters say she may come around. There's a better chance you'll get a date with Kate Upton.

Right now, you are an orbiter. Go ghost. That's the best thing that is for you. See if she tries to get back in contact with you. But don't hold your breath. Go get another girl, this one you're talking about "just wants to be friends" and will "ruin" it (lose her beta ego-booster man and give control of things to you) if sex or any physicality happens. Delete this girl ASAP. She is draining you. Her low interest is very evident. You deserve better. Judge nismo says.

Case closed.

 

[Cremasta]

She broke the date, so it's up to her to reschedule.

What she said doesn't matter. It's what you do that matters.
Find something, or someone, else to fill up your time.

Don't let your world start to revolve around this girl, not even a little bit, she hasn't earned that yet.

 

[WCS14]

I'm betting on your princess is in another castle.

3 dates with this girl and no makeout? Wake your ass up! She's not that interested. If a woman wanted to be taken by you, she would make it known. She wouldn't reject your advances, and a flake (via text at that) with no counteroffer is never good.

She has chest pains because she was getting her body passionately bitten and beaten by a better man. Gee, I wonder why she didn't get any sleep last night! Oh yeah, she was getting her vagina ripped apart.

Dude, she's making you wait. A woman who makes you wait to get physical wants you as a beta orbiter. She said not to think it's a blowoff, but I'm sorry dude, it is a blowoff. These other posters say she may come around. There's a better chance you'll get a date with Kate Upton.

Right now, you are an orbiter. Go ghost. That's the best thing that is for you. See if she tries to get back in contact with you. But don't hold your breath. Go get another girl, this one you're talking about "just wants to be friends" and will "ruin" it (lose her beta ego-booster man and give control of things to you) if sex or any physicality happens. Delete this girl ASAP. She is draining you. Her low interest is very evident. You deserve better. Judge nismo says.

Case closed.

Thanks for input from everyone!

Yes, I have come to the conclusion this girl DOES NOT have a high interest level in me. It is somewhere in the 40-50% range, not a good place to be.

However, I would think a girl with zero interest or low interest would not have bothered to write "please don't think I am just blowing you off".

I don't think I am down and out just yet!

Anyhow, I believe her excuse about stress, lack of sleep and chest pains. However, what I am dubious of is the source. Is it really from work or work only? Or is it because of some other guy she likes is giving her the run around and making her depressed and I AM THE BACKUP MAN!

I am proud of myself in how I handled the situation. When she cancelled I just said:

"I am sorry to hear about your stress, that is awful and get better soon. Talk to you soon."

I DID NOT get upset over her cancelling or question her honesty, etc. nor did I mention "let me know when you want to go out again".

I think I played it cool.

She also texted me back after that again to say how sorry again she was and TTYS!

So, what should my plan be, besides going after other women?

I think I SHOULD NOT initiate a text with her until she does first, correct?

 

[_sideways_]

Blow offfffffff.....and ur spending some energy thoughts on this chick....she wins...smh

 

[Lostsoul85]

Wait till next week Wednesday or thursday and call her up and say hey when are you free for Xyz and then set a date and time to meet up?That will give you a good indication of her interest level.

 

[GS750]

That's what I'd do. If you don't hear from her over the weekend give it one more try via phone call. Don't mention that she cancelled just let it go and ask her out. If she says no, or cancels the date then you drop her. Good luck.

 

[DragonBlood]

If she is well enough to go to work she is well enough for YOU.

I think you handled this well, I would wait but probably cool off a bit and ask other women. Otherwise this could become one of her habits as stalling tactic have worked. Possible its true, she wont forget you bought it either way.


"She has chest pains because she was getting her body passionately bitten and beaten by a better man. Gee, I wonder why she didn't get any sleep last night! Oh yeah, she was getting her vagina ripped apart. " lol nismo nice.

 

[TheGambino]

Don't trip about it, relax, wait a week she might reach out to you, if not call her set up another date, if she brings up sh*t again go ghost. Two strikes she's out. It's that simple bro

 

[Lotus Effect]

I went out with two college friends last wednesday! (A dude and a girl)

We all decided to hang out because my date flaked on me, the dude's date flaked on him, and the girl flaked on her date.

Now, onto what is usefull. The girl flaking, and what I saw on the other half.

She was going out with this guy. They had previous dates. Hell, they even travelled to the beach together. Bottomline, they were f*cking!

Anyway, she did not had too much interest on this guy, and was only f*cking him 'cause, her words, "I have nothing better to do".

And so, me and the other dude from college decided to hang out, we asked her, and promptly she flaked the guy telling him she was feeling ill, and that she would not be able to go.

Just like that.

And we've kept on laughing on his behalf, as the night went and he kept sending messages asking her if she was feeling better, and that she should rest and sh*t like that!

The guy haven't gave up, and she went out with him the friday that followed. Once again, only 'cause she had nothing better to do though.

So it is really up to you. It is a flake. She did blow you off!

Go ghost, and only then you can see her real Interest Level.

Or, do as the dude in the story I just told you, and chase her. You might get her eventually, but her view of you will be very well constructed. The image of a loser, that is!

 

[WCS14]

Why does dating have to be all these mind games?

I almost feel like damned if you do, damned if you don't.

You don't open the car door for the chick (which I didn't) you lack manners and have no chivalry (turn-off)

You open the car door for the chick (you are too nice). Once again, a turn-off.

This girl said she had chest pains, stress, blah, blah.

The gentlemanly thing and decent thing to do would be to text her. How are you feeling? But no, I can't I would not be a challenge and I would be too nice.

Sux.

But to the last couple posters--I will go ghost on her (unless she texts me first) all weekend and then call her Monday night.

I think disappearing for a week after going out on three dates (one very long date too) is a bit much.

 

[Maximus Rex]

The Celebrity Theory

Was supposed to have 4th date with girl tonight.

She sends me long text that she did not get any sleep last night and was having chest pains due to stress at work and she needs to go home and go to bed.

She said "please don't think I am just blowing you off" but she did not say, I would still like to see you or lets reschedule.

What do you think?

Ask yourself this question, do you think she would send this text to Christian Bale?

 

[WCS14]

Ask yourself this question, do you think she would send this text to Christian Bale?

That is a stupid comparison, as I am not a celebrity