Is there a way to be persistent without being creepy and without going in their friend zone?

[2Rocky]

WHAT YOU ARE ASKING IS HOW TO KNOCK HER OFF HER PEDESTAL

1) start dating her friends. Get them talking about you. Make her feel she is missing out.
2) find those things about her that annoy you. Her voice, her political views, her little dog, whatever
3) Be more of a challenge to her. Don't initiate all the conversations,
4) Highlight your values she seems to go after, without looking like you are showing off . Ie sports accomplishment, flashy assets, physical fitness, leadership in groups.
5) Be less available.
6) Make her feel like SHE has been friendzoned.
7) when she expresses interest, show and tell her she has one chance, and if she blows it cut her loose...

These are all things I've done with low-moderate interested women. when I went out with the High interest ones, I saw the others interest increase and they started asking about my High IL women...Hasn't necessarily converted the oneitis girls to High IL but made me appreciate the ones who were and see the low IL women for what they truly are....

 

[BadBoy89]

Every once in a while there is an amazing woman that is just way above the rest and has it all (i.e. Jessica Alba types that are not famous) - so let's say she doesn't reject you but she also doesn't allow anything to happen. You obviously refuse to be in any sort of friend-zone with any woman regardless of how amazing she is and you also obviously do not do anything creepy.

Is there a way to be persistent and try several times from a far without entering a friend zone (don't listen to her problems, don't be shoulder to cry on, don't be always available, etc.) and without being creepy but still putting yourself in a situation where you can have a chance? This is not just about sex but a women with whom you would want an actual relationship.

41 years old and you are asking this question?

Any woman around your age, her clothes better come off within 297 seconds. She is not a virgin and her goods are used up. I mean if the girl was 27 or something, OK maybe wait a little longer. But if the girl is older, she has NO time to talk, her clothes should come off or she should get out of your face.

I mean really.

 

[Plinco]

What if one found a 19 year old virgin, who isn't interested in instagram, or snapchat, and really reserved, so doesn't flirt with guys, or even puts herself out there? Though she may be a 5 face wise, but nice thin tight 19 year old body?

The teen virgin is the only exception as far as how many days it might take. Even then, the three virgins I took all happened within a week (one happened that night I met her). You should still be sexual though, as in your a man and she's a woman and you still want to sex her.

Keep in mind that she is young and immature.

 

[bat soup]

So, so true.

I always attempt to bang on the first date. If sex doesn't happen by the second date then the window starts to quickly close.

Sex on first date is ideal.

Sex on second date is kind a compromise so that she doesn't feel to slvtty.

There should never be a third date if sex hasn't happened yet. All Men should Next women who aren't putting out by the second date at latest.

If it doesn't happen quickly, it probably won't happen at all.

It pays not to be too patient with women.

 

[MatureDJ]

Why would you even do this instead of using the energy on a new Girl?

Because she's hotter than the "new Girl".

 

[MatureDJ]

3. Move on, 95% chance she doesn't want you sexually ever again

Next time, move faster.

This presupposes that she ever did want him sexually.

 

[MatureDJ]

Guys with abundance don't have time to send very transparent "value add" texts to a girl who won't fvck him. Any contact OP has with her lets her know that OP is thinking about her - therefore, OP is an utter loser in her eyes. She sure as sh1t isn't thinking about OP.

What self respecting guy would send random texts once a week to a girl who he isn't fvcking?

Best strategy is always complete withdrawal of attention. If she doesn't ever contact you again then you have your answer.

She's not contacting him to begin with.

 

[MatureDJ]

Somehow I had watched this movie; the whole movie was cringy, but this scene especially was the all-time cringe.

 

[MatureDJ]

If a woman thinks you're creepy or puts you in the friend zone, then she's certainly not "amazing".

So, she is amazing, but the OP is not desirable enough for her to have any interest.

 

[Willie Naylor]

Somehow I had watched this movie; the whole movie was cringy, but this scene especially was the all-time cringe.

This is a great movie. But, I forget, many on this forum think it's weird for a man to have emotions.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Every once in a while there is an amazing woman that is just way above the rest and has it all (i.e. Jessica Alba types that are not famous) - so let's say she doesn't reject you but she also doesn't allow anything to happen. You obviously refuse to be in any sort of friend-zone with any woman regardless of how amazing she is and you also obviously do not do anything creepy.

Is there a way to be persistent and try several times from a far without entering a friend zone (don't listen to her problems, don't be shoulder to cry on, don't be always available, etc.) and without being creepy but still putting yourself in a situation where you can have a chance?

There is no amazing. Comply or bye. No free attention.

Send location. Time. She comes or #next

Persistence is weak in 2021. Our grandfather's played that card but women moved differently. Women are *****s by and large in the west. Not worthy of persistence. Better use of time is persistence on your stock portfolio. Researching crypto and accumulating the right projects.

A poor ROI is women. Broken condom or donut away from expired.

This is not just about sex but a women with whom you would want an actual relationship.

Your not doing it right.

Your talking ltr and she's not following your lead. This wont end well.

 

[bat soup]

The only "amazing" girl is one that sucks you off the same day you first meet.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Girls who are willing to lose you, should.

There's a difference between being obsessive and playing it cool.

When options are abundant, playing it cool comes naturally. Like me right now, I have 6-7 girls on my rotation I don't even feel like responding to.

I have hickeys from a new girl every week, sometimes they overlap.

I know that often I go through dry spells that last a few months even. I'm no super chad and I probably act desperate subconsciously that time.

The real question is how to play it cool when I have no options (which happens often) in sharp contrast to my current situation.

I say use your time to:

- Hit the gym harder
- Clean up the diet more
- Hit up guy friends to go to cool trips/places
- Get a promotion/side hustle
- Try OLD
- Try social media
- Just go upto any girl you see anywhere and ask for the directions ----> progress to "oh thanks, do you come here often?" --->end with "give me your number"
- Go on solo trips

If you are focused on this, you'll never need to persist much if and when you meet a girl you want to hang out with.

 

[Sebastian0001]

Girls who are willing to lose you, should.

There's a difference between being obsessive and playing it cool.

When options are abundant, playing it cool comes naturally. Like me right now, I have 6-7 girls on my rotation I don't even feel like responding to.

I have hickeys from a new girl every week, sometimes they overlap.

I know that often I go through dry spells that last a few months even. I'm no super chad and I probably act desperate subconsciously that time.

The real question is how to play it cool when I have no options (which happens often) in sharp contrast to my current situation.

I say use your time to:

- Hit the gym harder
- Clean up the diet more
- Hit up guy friends to go to cool trips/places
- Get a promotion/side hustle
- Try OLD
- Try social media
- Just go upto any girl you see anywhere and ask for the directions ----> progress to "oh thanks, do you come here often?" --->end with "give me your number"
- Go on solo trips

If you are focused on this, you'll never need to persist much if and when you meet a girl you want to hang out with.

what is the success rate on the "Ask for directions" method? Wouldn't you need a little bit of flirting in between the "oh thanks do you com here often?" and the "give me your number"? Or do u just go straight to it?

 

[darksprezzatura]

what is the success rate on the "Ask for directions" method? Wouldn't you need a little bit of flirting in between the "oh thanks do you com here often?" and the "give me your number"? Or do u just go straight to it?

Words don't really matter.

You could open with anything.

A girl immediately sizes you up as a smash or pass.

Obviously, during cold approaches, girls don't know a lot of things about you that might turn them on later if she isn't attracted to you already.

But our time is limited.

My point is use the magic words, "give me your number" if she doesn't comply she isn't interested and you shouldn't waste your time.

 

[Mike32ct]

I just don’t think “persistence” works with chicks. Generally, things either happen fairly quickly or not at all.

 

[characternote]

I just don’t think “persistence” works with chicks. Generally, things either happen fairly quickly or not at all.

You do read some outrageous claims on forums and reddit and stuff of people claiming to be able to jedi mind-trick their way into ANY girls pants from a cold approach using their compliance ladder theory or their NLP or whatever, but I pretty much agree. You really can't negotiate attraction. I've never seen a single PUA coach with infields achieve what random people on the internet claim to be able to do lol.

The game is fairly simple and we're all basically at the same level. We've all read the material and it's not compliacted. The difference in results is mainly determined by other factors

 

[sangheilios]

@Sebastian0001 I haven't read through all of the posts on here but I have some personal experiences that may help you.

A few years back I had approached several different women that I had seen at the gym I had gone to, I'm no longer there btw. Anyway, a lot of these women were making eye contact with me and I decided to approach. One in particular rejected me by saying she had a bf but continued to go OUT of her way to engage with me, flirt, etc. This had gone on for a couple months and I decided to try again and naturally I got rejected. This woman was simply an attention ***** that was using me for validation. If she had full blown rejected me, I never would have been a potential source of emotional validation from her. However, because she wasn't interested, she isn't going to go out with me obviously. Now, why she was or was not interested in me is irrelevant, there could have been a million different things going on and trying to decipher them would have been a complete waste of time.

From my experience, if a woman ever says no or refuses to spend time with you one on one, like you would on a date or being alone at home, she isn't interested. Often times woman do stuff like this for emotional validation, attention, etc. Getting attention from men makes them feel good and I'm sure can be quite addicting to those women who have some issues going on within themselves. It also may simply be easier for a woman to reject you but be "nice" to you by continuing to be friendly, engage with you, etc. This is a method of conflict avoidance; most people are genuinely very uncomfortable with the idea of potential conflict and behave in a craven manner in order to avoid it. I would only apply this in situations where they need to be nice to you, say a coworker or a receptionist at the gym you frequent, etc. However, I'd mostly consider this emotional immaturity, most women have enough sense to not lead men on that they aren't interested in lol.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

Your applying old order thinking, we don't court women anymore, now women court us, but they want to believe they are being courted but want to feel on your unavailability in the process.

The thing is, we see a guy with a woman and immediately wonder what he's doing for her time, but his time really isn't worth that much to her outside of public appearance, most of the time.

Most women that I know make terrible choices in life in general because almost everyone in their life is going to excuse her except in the most extreme of outcomes, the modern woman is empowered to be dysfunctional, if you are a part of the dysfunction, that is ultimately where her feelings are and thus the genuine intimacy, however that is something that is dispelled quickly when it interfaces with public appearance.

Point blank, if you are looking for a functional woman, that functionality does not start with her, but her social circle. You are who you hang out with, as KS says, Single Women Keep Women Single... Single Women who hang around a married social circle will inevitably get married, again the functionality of it does not interface with her own life, but her compatibility to the social circle.

The only way to chase a woman today is to hang out with who she hangs out with and in a genuine way, you can't lurk.

I think this might be a bit confusing for some, but it's the best way I can articulate it

 

[devilkingx2]

Every once in a while there is an amazing woman that is just way above the rest and has it all (i.e. Jessica Alba types that are not famous) - so let's say she doesn't reject you but she also doesn't allow anything to happen. You obviously refuse to be in any sort of friend-zone with any woman regardless of how amazing she is and you also obviously do not do anything creepy.

Is there a way to be persistent and try several times from a far without entering a friend zone (don't listen to her problems, don't be shoulder to cry on, don't be always available, etc.) and without being creepy but still putting yourself in a situation where you can have a chance? This is not just about sex but a women with whom you would want an actual relationship.

I'm going to break the mold and say you can be persistent but the when and the why are the key questions.

When:
1. if she barely knows you, keep talking to her if you can and ask again for a date/phone number later on.
2. If she shows some attraction or interest, not enough for a date or sex but you think there's potential to build on, keep gaming her.

In any case I would say to cut your losses if you've been talking to a girl for a month and you're not close to getting somewhere.

Why:
the two major times that persistence didn't turn out to be a waste of time for me were with girls who seemed interested despite not wanting to go on a date/have sex with me.

One of them was hanging out with me all the time after putting me in the friend zone immediately, then two months later wanted to date me shortly after she become single.

The other one hasn't gone anywhere so far but if she is to be believed she wants to go out with me but is too busy with law school during the semester. So I'm waiting until December when she said she'd be more free, in the mean time she texts me everyday. so if I actually date and bang her that would be two major times persistence worked out.