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Is the solution to run an "all-out assault" on the dating market (i.e., be on every social medium, do day/night/social-circle-game, etc.)?
- Thread starter MatureDJ
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SW15
Master Don Juan
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- May 31, 2020
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I can see why the idea is put forth that "all-out assault" on the dating market is the solution. I don't agree with it. I would favor an strategy of doing 2-3 mediums and doing them well rather than being everywhere.
This is how I would rank the options
1. Social circle
2. Day game: Non-bar approaching
3. Bar approaching
4. Instagram
5. Other social media (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn)
6. Swipe apps
Social circle isn't feasible for a lot of men. Social circle will really be dependent upon what you did prior to the pandemic. Additionally, social circle works best for guys who are not nomadic. Frequent relocations ruin social circle. The men that I've known who used social circle the best were men that have been geographically fixed their whole lives. Their parents didn't relocate them from birth-age 18, and they stayed in that same area as an adult. The frequent movers (whether the moves were their decisions or not) often have weaker social ties, which forces them into worse venues for meeting people, such as swipe apps.
I like non-bar venue approaching best. The pandemic has hurt this. With grocery stores full of masked people, it's much less conducive to doing approaches there. In the 2010s, the grocery store was one of my top venues. Gyms aren't as viable as they were pre-pandemic. There are some outdoor fitness classes going on right now, and those are probably ok for approaching. The best day game option right now is walking/hiking paths in most cities, or the beach in a coastal area. That's the best workaround for the mask problem. Masks do affect pickup, because a smile is a key body language indicator of interest. Additionally, there's a big phobia of spending a lot of time indoors in a confined space. Fewer women will engage with you now in a grocery store or mall. Also, with the mall, fewer people are going.
Lots of bars are still shut down or operating with a greatly reduced population. Bars with a lot of outdoor space in warmer climates are the best option right now.
Instagram is debatable. There are a lot of hot women on Instagram. So many guys are trying to slide into their DMs. If you're going to do Instagram, you have to do it well yourself. You have to post pics of having an awesome lifestyle. Not a lot of guys can do Instagram well. If you can't do Instagram well, it is better to use other means.
This is how I would rank the options
1. Social circle
2. Day game: Non-bar approaching
3. Bar approaching
4. Instagram
5. Other social media (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn)
6. Swipe apps
Social circle isn't feasible for a lot of men. Social circle will really be dependent upon what you did prior to the pandemic. Additionally, social circle works best for guys who are not nomadic. Frequent relocations ruin social circle. The men that I've known who used social circle the best were men that have been geographically fixed their whole lives. Their parents didn't relocate them from birth-age 18, and they stayed in that same area as an adult. The frequent movers (whether the moves were their decisions or not) often have weaker social ties, which forces them into worse venues for meeting people, such as swipe apps.
I like non-bar venue approaching best. The pandemic has hurt this. With grocery stores full of masked people, it's much less conducive to doing approaches there. In the 2010s, the grocery store was one of my top venues. Gyms aren't as viable as they were pre-pandemic. There are some outdoor fitness classes going on right now, and those are probably ok for approaching. The best day game option right now is walking/hiking paths in most cities, or the beach in a coastal area. That's the best workaround for the mask problem. Masks do affect pickup, because a smile is a key body language indicator of interest. Additionally, there's a big phobia of spending a lot of time indoors in a confined space. Fewer women will engage with you now in a grocery store or mall. Also, with the mall, fewer people are going.
Lots of bars are still shut down or operating with a greatly reduced population. Bars with a lot of outdoor space in warmer climates are the best option right now.
Instagram is debatable. There are a lot of hot women on Instagram. So many guys are trying to slide into their DMs. If you're going to do Instagram, you have to do it well yourself. You have to post pics of having an awesome lifestyle. Not a lot of guys can do Instagram well. If you can't do Instagram well, it is better to use other means.
crosscheck1331
Don Juan
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- Oct 25, 2020
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- 61
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- 27
I have never really used online dating, but I follow a principle that I call "less effort". I basically just go out there and whatever happens, happens. I don't make it my priority to meet women. From the age of 18 to 20 when I was able to start going to clubs (although I couldn't get drinks) I would try very hard to meet women in these places and often ended up empty handed. I looked and asked others for advice and I implemented it as best I could but it just didn't work no matter what I did and I couldn't understand why. I think I simply tried too hard if that's even possible. After one night where I was unsuccessful (this was during the summer two years ago) I was so mad with myself that I said I wasn't going to go out of my way anymore and I no longer gave a ****. So I stopped with everything. If I went out it was to enjoy myself, it wasn't to try to hook up or anything. Since then things changed for me. I don't know why but I know intuitively that the shift happened once I stopped caring. That is/was my experience anyway, maybe someone can vouch for it and tell a similar story. So yeah, my suggestion is to unplug basically.
darksprezzatura
Master Don Juan
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I didn't watch the video but my 2 cents:
This is just another name for high volume approach.
This would lead to results 10/10 just from a probabilistic point of view.
You WILL find a woman to sleep with.
It's rather helpful to guys who are new to the game, get their blood flowing and get out used to approaching.
For seasoned guys, I'm not sure if investing a lot of time is worth it.
This is just another name for high volume approach.
This would lead to results 10/10 just from a probabilistic point of view.
You WILL find a woman to sleep with.
It's rather helpful to guys who are new to the game, get their blood flowing and get out used to approaching.
For seasoned guys, I'm not sure if investing a lot of time is worth it.
redskinsfan92
Master Don Juan
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- Jun 18, 2018
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- 1,856
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- 1,479
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- 32
I don't care what anyone says, online dating is the fvcking worse medium to pursue.
Romanemp22
Master Don Juan
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- Aug 30, 2020
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- 27
In Europe you can drink even if you're 15 in bars
Who Dares Win
Master Don Juan
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- Jan 16, 2012
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No fvcking way, in order for me to be turned on I need to have a good looking not annoying girl in front of me physically.
Unless Im turned on no way at all Im willing to do 4 additional jobs (which is what for a man is staying on social media) for something I dont even need in that moment.
Guys in their late teens and 20s now have my total solidarity for the crappy environment they find themselves in.
Unless Im turned on no way at all Im willing to do 4 additional jobs (which is what for a man is staying on social media) for something I dont even need in that moment.
Guys in their late teens and 20s now have my total solidarity for the crappy environment they find themselves in.
SW15
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 31, 2020
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- 11,683
Meeting women is a time and labor intensive pursuit, no matter how you slice it.
Swiping and texting is a lot of wasted effort. It takes a lot of swiping and texting time to secure a date. That date is also most likely to go nowhere.
Instagram DM game is good idea, but you've also got to live an Instagram worthy life and have a strong Instagram presence yourself. That also takes time.
Pre-COVID, I did a ton of day gaming. In either the grocery store, the mall, or on a walking/hiking path, you really needed a minimum of 2 hours per day game session to generate 1-2 prospects. It's not efficient at all. Day game is supposed to make up for that by reducing the number of bad first game and increasing the number of viable first dates that amount to something meaningful.
With fitness classes, you are "wasting" 45-60 minutes on a class for the window of 5 mins before class and 5 mins after class to do approaches. Thats at best 3 approaches. 1 or 2 quality ones. You at least get a workout in with that, which you can justify as a part of staying in shape to attract women.
Developing a social circle from the ground up is labor intensive. It pays the least dividends in the short run, but has the potential if done right to be the most useful. Social circle development isn't feasible for a lot of men.
Most men don't have the free time to do an all-out assault. Guys 30+ who are single naturally have fewer friends because social circles are dominated by established couples who don't want single men around. Single men aren't all that keen on hanging with established couples either. Even with fewer friends, an all-out assault may not even be feasible. You do need time for your job, working out, other hobbies, and friends.
Swiping and texting is a lot of wasted effort. It takes a lot of swiping and texting time to secure a date. That date is also most likely to go nowhere.
Instagram DM game is good idea, but you've also got to live an Instagram worthy life and have a strong Instagram presence yourself. That also takes time.
Pre-COVID, I did a ton of day gaming. In either the grocery store, the mall, or on a walking/hiking path, you really needed a minimum of 2 hours per day game session to generate 1-2 prospects. It's not efficient at all. Day game is supposed to make up for that by reducing the number of bad first game and increasing the number of viable first dates that amount to something meaningful.
With fitness classes, you are "wasting" 45-60 minutes on a class for the window of 5 mins before class and 5 mins after class to do approaches. Thats at best 3 approaches. 1 or 2 quality ones. You at least get a workout in with that, which you can justify as a part of staying in shape to attract women.
Developing a social circle from the ground up is labor intensive. It pays the least dividends in the short run, but has the potential if done right to be the most useful. Social circle development isn't feasible for a lot of men.
Most men don't have the free time to do an all-out assault. Guys 30+ who are single naturally have fewer friends because social circles are dominated by established couples who don't want single men around. Single men aren't all that keen on hanging with established couples either. Even with fewer friends, an all-out assault may not even be feasible. You do need time for your job, working out, other hobbies, and friends.