Is she playing the game with me or just playing?

[Pimp-sicle]

DJ's:

I'll cut right to it (but it will probably still be long... LOL) I went out a few weeks ago to a local hot spot with my buddy. Once I get in I head straight for the bar. On my way there this HB7.5 (great body) comes over to me and literally jumps on me and gives me a huge hug. I chit-chat with her for a few minutes, finally order my drink and she tells me to find her later. So I soak in the club and get my drink on and then decide to approach the girl. (about an hour or so later) When I find her she's surrounded by a sea of guys while her friends and her dance with eachother. I get around all the guys walk right up to her friend and start dancing. Her friend loves it and she's smiling and hooting and hollering. I then start talking with the other friend, when out of the blue HB7.5 grabs me and says:

HB: "Your sooooo cute."

I thank her, tell her she's not so bad herself and to validate it with a kiss. She happily leans over the table to kiss me. We again talk for a few minutes and after # closing, she tells me to come back next week to hang out again. The bar was about to close, so I left the girls and eventually ducked outta there without saying anything to her. So the next week comes around and I show up at the bar again with my other buddy. Keep in mind I never called her (4 days past between the 1st and 2nd meeting). So after about an hour of being there I see her two friends show up. I go up to them and talk to them and then go back to hanging with my friend. After a few minutes her friend flags me over and I go over to talk. I casually ask where HB7.5 was and they tell me she just got off work and was on her way.

So HB7.5 shows up about 20 minutes later and she's staring at me from across the bar. I go to approach her and say what's up. We dance for a few minutes and then she starts saying random shiat. She goes:

HB: "I kinda wanna make out right now"

I bust out the C/F and tell her to slow down and then tell her to start off with a kiss on the lips. She goes:

HB: "I'm only going to give you a kiss on the cheek."

So as she leans in, I pull away at the last second. She then asks me another random question:

HB: What's something crazy that's happened to you when you were making out with a girl

So I tell her a funny story I went through and then she tells me some story of her's. She then tells me she's "kinda feeling that guy over there." So I tell her to stop wasting time with me and get over there. So the rest of the night I focused my attention on her friend who I danced with last time. I'm drunk as fuvk at this point and her other friend asks me if I'm going to "hit on" HB7.5 again tonight. I laugh and say she came on to me last time and besides she looks pretty pre-occupied with that ugly guy over there..LOL The dood was caveman like. Both the girls immediately go "Oh that's only her friend, don't worry about him." I again laugh and tell them that she can do whatever she wants, I don't even know them. One of the friend's then goes, "HB7.5 couldn't stop talking about you all the way home the other night, she kept telling us how hot she thinks you are." On seperate ocassions both girls mention to me that I'm extremely good looking...LOL whatever. HB7.5 would look over at me a few times, but I didn't bite. She did end up disappearing with that caveman for a while and then suddenly reappeared. Let your mind wander on what they were doing....

When I left that night I had no intention of calling her or talking to her again. So a few days later I'm getting ready to go out to my buddy's New Year's Party and I get a call from her, I didn't answer. I check the message later and she's all bubbly and happy on the message telling me to call her back. I don't call her back that night. The next day I contemplated calling her back and thought WTF, lets see what she wanted.

So I call her and she immediately answers and sounds extremely happy to hear from me. She tells me she called me last night (duh that's why I'm calling you back) and asks me why I didn't call her back. I lie and tell her I was already waaay drunk when she called and didn't have my phone near me. She buys it and tells me she wanted to invite me over to her place because she was throwing a New Year's Party. I ask her if it was big or small party, she says "Oh just a small thing, like 10-15 people." However she called me after 9 on New Year's Eve. Even if I didn't have plans I wouldn't have gone. We talk for a bit and I tell her that I'll be going out to the bars again during the week and she immediately tells me to call her because she wants to go too.

Well last week I got super sick from all the partying I did and didn't go out period. So the week went by and I didn't end up calling HB7.5 until this past Sunday. I thought this would be a good test to see if she was still interested or if she didn't care. So I call and she answers and sounds like shiat. Coughing, sneezing etc. I apologize and tell her I was ill this past week and she tells me that she's been extremely ill too so its no big deal. She asks when she gets to see me again and I tell her that I'm going out on Tuesday & Thrusday night. She tells me she has work Thrusday night but she wants to meet up Tuesday. I tell her I'll call her and let her know the details.

So yesterday I call her up and she calls back. I tell her that my buddy and I wanted to go to bar X because they have a dance floor and she tells me she's not sure where she was going to go to. I tell her that I'm going to bar X for sure and she tells me to call her once I get there so we can meet up later in the night. About an hour later she calls me (I was in the shower), then she calls again. She leaves a message saying "hey you, me and friend just left our apartment, so call me back so we can meet up." I busted some awesome C/F on her in the phone coversation we had earlier and she referred back to that on the two messages she left me. So I call her back and tell her I'd be there soon.

We get to the place and she's look BANGIN'. Tight little hot pink top with nice cleavage popping out, @ss tight jeans, high heels, the works. I go over to greet her and she's happy and smiling. We sit down at the bar with her friend and my buddy. We shoot the shiat for about an hour and then decide to go dance. Now during our conversation I noticed that her friend was laughing at everything I said, constantly was telling me "your an @sshole" then laughing and she kept staring at me from across the high top. HB7.5 was sitting next to me and I kinoed her a bit and she kinoed me back. I noticed at one point my knee was touching her thigh underneath the table and she kept it there. HB7.5 wasn't drinking, since she was driving. We go to the dance floor and I'm trying to play the game here a bit.

I decide to work the jealousy angle again and dance with her friend. Her friend is loving it and I pushed HB7.5 over to dance with my friend. Occasionally HB7.5 would come up behind me and dance and I'd go dance with her for spurts, but for the most part I danced with her friend for most of the night. Now I figured that it was a chess match at this point. As her friend got progressively more intoxicated, she started getting more aggressive with me. Touching my @ss, staring deeply into my eyes etc. HB7.5 definitely noticed this and started busting out her A game dance moves on my buddy. (I'm sure he wasn't complaining) HB7.5 did mention something about her t*ts to me. She said the first step was getting past Mt. (whatever she nicknamed her t*ts), I believe in reference to hooking up. While I was dancing with her friend I would randomly slap/grab HB7.5's @ss and she didn't seem to mind. She started to pull out the big guns at this point, in her game play. When I approached to dance with her right before the night ended, she goes, "uh uh uh, no touching." So I laugh and go back to dancing with her friend. Her friend then randomly tells me that I have a "40% chance with HB7.5" I laugh and go to HB7.5 and say "so I only have a 40% chance huh" (in a ****y/confident manner." She rambles off some jargon about averages which I didn't fully catch.

So a short while later we decide to leave and we say our goodbyes. Her friend gives me a hug and my friend hugs HB7.5. I playfully wave at HB7.5 from a distance and she spreads her arms out, I motion for her to come over to me and she does. She gives me a hug and then asks if we wanted a ride to our cars. Our cars were across the street, but she insisted. So she gives us a ride, I thank them and leave.

Ok I know that was a short novel, but I'm honestly just getting back in the game so excuse the long post.

My gut feeling is she has interest in me but I don't think its high enough right now. I think were both trying to make eachother jealous and it seems to be working. I definitely am not a fan of hanging out in bars with girls you meet but I didn't know if I was going to NEXT this chick before it got started or not, so that's why I decided to go to a bar with her again. Anyways give me your inputs guys. Tell me what you think's going on and how I should proceed from here.



PIMP

 

[MacAvoy]

Well your story was very long, but very interesting. I think you did well creating attraction, good game overall. However, next time you see her, you have to make a move.

Its great that you've created attraction but sometimes you also have to be the man and make your move. Keep up the good work.

 

[flexion_]

Yep its pretty much established that she is interested in you. You have to actually do something to move this along if you want to take it any further.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Originally posted by MacAvoy
Well your story was very long, but very interesting. I think you did well creating attraction, good game overall. However, next time you see her, you have to make a move.

Its great that you've created attraction but sometimes you also have to be the man and make your move. Keep up the good work.

Thanks for the response MacAvoy and Flexion but I don't think its looking as peachy as you guys think. Obviously her interest level was high when she first met me because she approached me, but I think it was an error to meet up with her on that Wednesday night because I'm letting her lead. Instead, I should've called her up and gone on a date. That would've gave me a much better indicator on what type of person she is, rather than when she's around her girls dancing in a club. Then I set up another meeting at a bar yesterday which was more of the same. Last night I went to the bathroom and came out and saw a guy dancing with her on the dance floor, she was dancing faaaaaaar away from him and when I got back she looked at me and her friend and said "save me." LOL I still think I have a chance but I've shot myself in the foot by not isolating and executing. I plan on calling her up later this week. I want to set something up 1 on 1 rather than this whole bar business. I am absolutely terrible and getting girls to date me. I'm a PRO and seducing girls and getting them to want to hook up with me.

Its funny because with every girl I date or hook up with I know I can kiss her, I know I can do whatever I want. I guess getting out of a bad LTR and getting back into the game puts doubts in your aresenal. More thoughts would be appreciated.



PIMP

 

[MacAvoy]

I think your talking yourself down a bit, granted you may have trouble taking it to the next level. However your not at the LJBF zone yet. But if you don't make your move the next time you see her, you're going to lose the seduction value you built up.

Call her up and do something one on one w/ her, preferable something where you can bring her back to your place afterwards. Or simply call her up and invite her to an evening at your house.

That way she either comes straight up, or you can decide to stop wasting more of your resources (time & energy) on her.

 

[JackPrescott]

Originally posted by flexion_
Yep its pretty much established that she is interested in you. You have to actually do something to move this along if you want to take it any further.

Wanna fukk both of them? Bring a third lady into the picture, and make out with her in front of both of them, at a dance club, and leave with her. Your cell will ring off the hook after that.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Originally posted by MacAvoy
I think your talking yourself down a bit, granted you may have trouble taking it to the next level. However your not at the LJBF zone yet. But if you don't make your move the next time you see her, you're going to lose the seduction value you built up.

Call her up and do something one on one w/ her, preferable something where you can bring her back to your place afterwards. Or simply call her up and invite her to an evening at your house.

That way she either comes straight up, or you can decide to stop wasting more of your resources (time & energy) on her.

Your probably right about me being a little too hard on myself, but I guess that's the way I am when I'm not in complete control. I definitely know she has healthy interest in me just by her tone of voice, always answers my calls and by her working around my schedule to meet up. But like I said, no more of this bar bullshyt!! I think the few girls who we meet at bars who are actually worth more than a first interview need to be taken out of the enviorment to see what type of person they really are. Its honestly sooo hard to get a good read on a person when they're partying, not to mention its hard to work your game to the best of your ability.

Anyways, I think I'm going to wait it out for a few days, and give her a call this weekend. I'll set something up for next week one on one and see how she reacts. If she gives me the run around then I'll cut it off right there.

Good post MacAvoy.



PIMP

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Originally posted by Maximus_Decimus
All women play games. Some just do it more frequently and are more outrageous than others.

Agreed!! If they didn't play games we wouldn't have these dating forums....



Sounds like you did a good job overall, especially with the kiss close.

Creating attraction and closing have always been my strong points, its all the potential obstacles that come after, that give me trouble.

Pimp, answer her vaguely next time she asks you why you didn't call back or she asks you where you were. You can say, "I went out and I didn't hear my phone ring." Let her wonder where you were. Even if you were out with guy friends only without other chicks, you don't have to disclose that to her - it's none of her business. Use ****y & Funny to deflect her questions and bust her up if she keeps pursuing ... the end result is:

I thought I was pretty vague with my response. She said she called me, and I said I was already "waaaaay too drunk and not near my phone" when she called. But I see your point about saying something like "I didn't hear my phone ring." I'll store that one in the memory bank.

- She doesn't know where you were
- Most importantly, she is wondering if you were with another chick

Interesting point you bring up here. When she spent the majority of the night with the other dood, I was pretty much over it. I didn't really think she was using him to make me jealous, but I should've known better. I get the impression that she thinks I pull tons of @ss. Which definitely is true when I'm on top of my game, but like I said I've been out of the game for a bit, so I'm rusty.

Did you specifically tell her you would call her on a specific day and a specific time? If you didn't, no need to apologize. Dude, she is not your GF yet ... you two are just 'friends' at this point ... you owe her no apologies unless you specifically promised her and broke your promise.

I never told her I'd call her on a specific day. I was a little iffy-iffy about the apology as well, but just made it really casual and quick. But your right, its not like I owe her shiat, so I didn't have to say anything. Plus I'm sure if I didn't say anything she would've asked why I didn't call and then I could've just said "I was sick."



Isolate, isolate, isolate! You gamed her well enough that she was interested in seeing you again. Remember, the end game is closing the deal - ie. f*cking her. In this case, you had a chance to set the venue so no more obstacles would come up. From there, you can escalate without obstacles getting in the way.

Couldn't agree with your more here! I should've definitely went out with just her rather than another bar night. But like I said, I didn't know if she was just a dumb bar w-hore or someone worth getting to know better at that point.

Maximus_Decimus

So my game plan is to wait it out an extra few days and then call her to set something up. I'm not a huge fan of waiting a week or more to call because I feel by then the girl will just be over it. I was planning on calling her Sunday and going from there. Do you feel like her interest is still there or is this something that's going to need extensive damage control? Anything else you feel I should know before I tackle this?



PIMP

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Max:

Thanks for the link I'll check it out. Well my thought in waiting a few days is to see if that elevates her interest. I definitely think calling too soon for another date even when a girl has healthy interest is the wrong way to go. But, yeah I'll keep you posted on the situation.


I went out last night and met another girl. Kiss & # closed again. I'll have the same goal tonight....




PIMP

 

[Pimp-sicle]

As for HB7.5, here's what happened.

So I waited until this past Sunday to call her with the simple goal of getting a date with JUST HER. Isolation as you guys have said, was key to putting myself in a better position with her.

So I call her up and she answers and again sounds like crap.

HB: Helllooo
ME: HB, its Pimp are you sick AGAIN!
HB: Yeah (coughing)
ME: Late night partying again...(sarcastic tone) I'm actually feeling pretty crappy myself but that's the price you pay when you party
HB: Yeah definitely
ME: You know you always answer the phone when I call, most girls don't answer ALL the time like you do.
HB: Well its not like you call me all the time.
ME: (sarcastic tone) Oooohhh poor baby, I'll make a mental note to call you everyday just to check up on you from here on out.
HB: Your such a dork.
ME: So I've got an idea
HB: Oh yeah, what's that.
ME: Me, you, mini-golf this week
HB: OMG I LOOOOOVE MINI GOLF, I HAVE TO WARN YOU THOUGH I ROCK!! I'LL KICK YOUR @SS
ME: (laughing) well I'm not one of those guys who well just let you win, I'm pretty damn competitive. Count on losing so you don't feel bad, well keep score for sure.
HB: (laughing) we will see.
ME: What's your schedule like for the week.
HB: (runs through everyday for me) How about Tuesday
ME: Tuesday works for me, alright cool I'll see you Tuesday
HB: Well, maybe, as long as I feel better. Call me Tuesday
ME: Ok

So I call her yesterday around 6:30 (Tuesday) and don't get a call back within a reasonable time. I'm thinking alright I'll give her the benefit of the doubt I know she was sick, maybe she passed out after work (8:30-5:30) and she's not feeling up to it. If she calls tomorrow and apologizes, not big deal.

Then around 10:30 I get a phone call from her. Now normally I wouldn't answer, but I thought ahh what the hell, let's hear what she comes up with.


Me: Hello
HB: Hey, Pimp its HB7.5. What'cha doing?
Me: Just relaxing tryin to get rid of this cold I've got.
HB: So r my buddies and your buddies going to go the bar this weekend?
Me: ummm...probably not.
HB: (ignores the my answer, fumbling for words) yeah I'm just in the car with my roomie. I got your message earlier, but I just wasn't feeling up to "par." (laughs) oh get it, "up to par" since we were suppose to go mini-golfing today. We are on our way back from the gym.

(so she's not feeling well but she went to work out....(she must have thought I was a total amatuer....c'mon...LOL)

Me: yeah I get it. Look I'm going to be honest with you. I can sit here and play this game with you too, but I already told you that I wanted to go out with you and get to know you better. Now I thought we had an agreement but if your having second thoughts or whatever, that's cool. If you just see me as someone to party with at the bars, then that's cool too but you gotta let me know.
HB: Well the thing is I don't know yet.
Me: Alright, I can accept that and that's your choice.
HB: Well I guess I'll talk to you later or call you later this week or whatever.
Me: Nah, you don't have to. I'm sure I'll see you around. bye..click

Well obviously she flaked on me and wasn't sure about her interest in me, be it romantic or a "friend." LOL This could've been a shiat test because she's a girl and well they do that but I figured rather than play her game, I was just going to be straightforward with her. I figured this was the deal breaker, if we went out I'm sure I would've seduced the fuvk outta her and she'd be eating outta my hand by next week. But unfortunately I didn't get that opportunity.

So what do you guys think about my approach to this? Was I too nice, was I too accepting of her obvious bullshyt lies? In the past I would've told a girl off for this and hung up on her. Now as I age I realize that situations like these are somewhat out of your control and there's not point in fretting over it. Plus I have other options so I don't really take it as my loss as much as her's.

And as far as accepting her invitation to go bar hopping with her friends and my friends this weekend, I really didn't see any point. If I accepted it I'd be a total chump who is being controlled like a puppet by her and it would get me nowhere. Although there is a small part of me that things I could've easily turned it around by flirting with other girls in front of her, in essence making her want me bad if this happened enough. Anyways I'd love to here your thoughts and suggestions. I can't say I'm completely shocked by her flaking because I already felt like I'd be digging myself outta a small hole to get her. But I definitely didn't expect her to call me back after flaking.

Seems like I might have avoided a head-ache by taking the Advil before the head-ache started...


Well I went out last week, # closed a girl, then hooked up with another girl at a party on Friday night, so I'm definitely getting back in the game. Got a party to go to tomorrow and more fun ahead....

 

[ShawnLG]

It sounds like she was stringing you all along. You should of got her address and the time to pick her up for the gulf date. This would make her flake sooner if she was not interested. Her having you to call her on the date to make shure she was feeling better is a red flag. I was leaded on in the same situation.

The girl I was seeing told me to confirm a date. I called and left a message. Four hours later, she calls and apologies. She tells me that she was out riding with some guy on his Harley!

My advice, never call to confirm a date. If she is really interesed in you, she would have you at high priority and not give any subtle hints on it's cancellation.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Shawn:

Thanks for the response. I think like I said before I should've just called her up for a one-on-one right after I met her the first night. I was playing on her terms when I went to meet up with her at the bar the following Wednesday and it gave her the impression that I was her puppy dog. My whole issue with her was not knowing if she was a bar w-hore or a someone worth getting to know better. Whatever, I definitely played this one wrong I should have fuvk closed her within a week of her being all over me at the bar.

I just hate when I fuvk up with a girl and she thinks I'm a chump, cuz I know I'm not. And as selfish as it sounds she was an ego stroke to me, though she seemed like a cool chick. I'll definitely make a mental note of my errors and be sure not to repeat them.


Back to the field....




PIMP