I was hanging out with some Israeli girls in Vegas the other night. Me and my friends tried to pick them up. We ended up going to a quiet bar and talking for hours. It was apparent that these girls were not open to casual sex. One had a bf back home and one had recently broken up. Their view on sexuality is that its some thing special to be shared with a guy you love. They did not want their number count to exceed more than 3. One girl said she would feel ashamed if she slept with 3 guys and didnt end up marrying them. These girls were 21 yrs old and cute. They were sexy yet modest and feminine. They were pleasant to be around and relatively intelligent. They shyed away from overly sexual conversation. One of my friends was desperately trying to get them to open up sexually. They resisted. It was a refreshing experience compared to the modern American slut.
This is when i understood how corrupted our American society is. Women are not taught that sex is an expression of a bond between 2 people. This is one of the main reasons the American female is so mentally screwed up. Promiscuity has a negative result on a persons psyche ( male or female). Even the PUA community has corrupted men. Having multiple sex partners does not lead to fulfillment. Having a meaningful relationship with one gorgeous sane chick leads to fulfillment.
In conclusion i do believe that sex is meant to be special. Acting as if sex is not special is chartering into dangerous territory. We have seen this in action ever since the feminist movement and the sexual revolution of the 1960s. Viewing sex as casual causes the decay of the nuclear family.
Almost every slut i know has had to take a "break" from sex. Sometimes they call it going celibate temporarily or having a sexual cleanse or whatever. This is because having too much casual sex is destroying their psyche. This is evidence that sex is best used as an expression of a strong bond monogamous relationship.
Even men are not made to mindlessly have casual sex:
1) You do not want to fvck old or ugly women, or basically women who are unattractive to you in general, even if you could. And even if you do, you might feel shame and regret afterward for stooping so low. If your brain was wired to just "sow your wild oats" as is said, then you would not feel any hesitation, shame or regret in who you fvck. You would be trying to fvck anything with two X chromosomes because in biological terms it costs you nothing. Yet, you don't.
2) Sex feels better with an emotional bond, as you said. This is not the case in species that are not monogamous, and do not pair bond. For those species, sex is not improved by emotion or emotional at all, just a mechanical act. Not so for humans of either gender.
3) A main reason why men may want so much casual sex is because they want to validate themselves as living up to an externally set male ideal by having it. But if you are honest with yourself, just like the female hoe, you will eventually be forced to admit that what is pleasurable is not necessarily the same as what is fulfilling, and that what is pleasurable may even cease to be so out of numbness if it is not fulfilling.
But here is the thing: we are so obsessed with casual sex, because we have nothing else. Our lives/culture are so empty of anything else that mechanic hedonism and egoistic validation is all we have or could even conceive to possibly have. My acquaintance in Egypt was a virgin when he married his wife, and one might assume his wife was as well. Is he a chump? no. His life is just based on higher philosophy than mechanic hedonism and egoistic validation, at least nominally.
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And that's just the psychological. If you add the practical evolutionary pressures themselves that have shaped this you also get STDs, lack of birth control and the risk of pregnancy (this is huge for explaining emotional bonding with sex, and shows just how bizarre it is to have sex and orgasm without bonding especially for women), investing in offspring to help them survive better being a more productive strategy, the interplay between mating strategy and social cohesion which means it is not as simple as men being more successful who are inclined to fvck everything (either they can get in trouble for it, or even if they don't, their society as a whole might be weaker and displaced by a monogamously based society and thus outcompeted), and whatever else.
There are men and women for whom everything I wrote above does not apply, and they can live an alternative lifestyle. Mating strategies are different at individual levels in every species. But if you are having doubts, I think what I write makes sense.
