Is my GF testing me?

[DJmonster]

Give me a little credit now, I texted her this morning before I posted on here. I'm not going to talk to her until she calls me, and I'm not going to send her any email. I am older, 24, but yes, this is my first ltr. I hadn't been to this forum for awhile, and unfortunately I developed a case of one-itus. I think I need to date other women.

 

[RabidDog]

She didnt return it because alex turned it off, I'd lay pipe.. er money on it.

Next--->

 

[PEACEDJ]

One piece of advice: Women ALWAYS test men. Even if you think you're having a general conversation of some random, she's testing you to see how you would respond.

Well back to your conflict. I wouldn't say she's testing you... although there are hints in there, but the only way to cure this is pull back and be a challenge again. Stop listening to what she says and look at the way she acts. Actions speak louder than words. Oh and you started to sound like an AFC as soon as you started getting mad at the girl for a phone number. Not that it's bad you did it, but next time do it in a way that you won't show her your insecurities. You're obviously winning her, so don't get all pissed about it, just tell her to remove it. Another point, the part where you mentioned about your 6 month anniversary... I'm sorry, but I have never done that much for a girl in 6 MONTHS. I still think 6 month should be the time of testing each other to see if she's compatible for a long time. Right now you need to start busting out C&F comments and start acting blunt. Stop giving her so much power and security that you still like her. She has to feel like she's on the cliff of a mountain and that she might fall at anymoment.

Hopefully you'll take my advice and use it wisely... Good Luck

 

[CLOONEY]

U say u developed one-itis? Is this girl your girlfriend or just a girl you are dating?

She is your girlfriend I am guessing. How old is she?

She is confused and doubting the relationship, obviously. Most chicks will do this, but should not do it so openly. What u need to do is quiet simple..........

U gotta tell her, it was a fight, every relationship has fights. It is part of being in a relationship. U have apologised and that is all you can do. Do not apologise again about this incident, forget about it and LET HER KNOW, that now u have apologised u cant do anything more.

If she still "cant get over it", she is quiet OBVIOUSLY not worth the trouble. Let that little confused girl stuff with the head of another guy.

 

[MacDiddy]

Do not contact her. Wait for however long it takes for her to contact you. In that time prepare for the fact that she might be dating other guys or just hanging out with a gf for comfort while she sorts herself out. Theres nothing you can actively do except to accept it, wait patiently and go out and hang out with your mates and try to meet as many chicks as you can. And don't go whinning to your mates!!! Get out there and meet other people.

If she contacts you, behave like nothing has happened. Like it was just a bad dream. Do not ask her out and do not ask of her anything that might give her the opportunity to say no. Coz that'll hurt! Always be the one ending the conversation.

I know it hurts and we've all been there. Heck even I sometimes need someone to tell me what I'm saying to you.

 

[DJmonster]

My girlfriend is only 19, and I say I developed one-itis, because in the last month I've been thinking about her as my one and only, the girl I will marry someday, and I know I shouldn't be thinking like that. The more I think about it, the more I realize that I could do much better than her. I've already told her it was just a fight, and every relationship has fights, and I've apologized. She's had a week already to get over it. I'm going to break up with her. I've thought about doing it many times, but I couldn't stand the idea of hurting her. This is a perfect opportunity for me to end it with the least amount of harm. Its funny how I was so sad about what was going on with us, now after posting here, and stepping back to look at the reality of our relationship, I'm actually getting excited to be done with it, move on, start meeting new girls, and spending more time with friends. MacDiddy, thats a good point about not whinning to my mates. They don't need me dumping that crap on them, and they will admire me for being able to shrug this off.

I could play the game, make myself a challenge again like I did in the beginning of our relationship, but I've decided she is not worth it, so I'm nexting her. What is the best way to do this? I'd like to do it in person, but I don't know if she'll see me right now. Do I just get on with my life, wait till she calls, tell her we need to meet so we can talk, then do it? I'd like to do this as soon as possible. I've never broken up with a girl, so any advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[DJ_Dork]

I've made some of the same mistakes you have. But then again that girl is making LOTS of mistakes..huge signs of insecurity on her part too. Not only that, she is IMMATURE.. no girl should ever bring up her sexual past with any exes UNLESS asked about. I dated a girl that would blurt out "When I used to go to the movies, I would get my ex to finger me" at odd times. Perhaps she was hinting she likes being touched there while watching movies with someone she likes? She should HINT , not talk about her past. But then again, after dating her several months she always used the "past experience" to provide facts. She's one of those.. pragmatic blunt types.

This does not mean you should do what she likes just because she hints/says it. If she asks you to jackoff in front of her, then you should have at least some kissing and some fingering before you do your deed. However if she says put on a dog collar and let me walk around and you oblige even though you find it humiliating but is doing it just to satisfy her..you are doing everything wrong.

 

[DJ_Dork]

Oh yeah, and she's 19 dude. I wouldn't consider her material for a REAL relationship. Lower your hopes if you consider her "real material." Cause in the real world and in America, girls under 25 are idiots.

 

[thiebear]

Just drop it!


4. Just end it. Say your uncomfortable and TRUST is the backbone of a relationship Let her know that even if SHE didnt break the trust.. you cant get over it and must move on for your own sanity...

 

[JustDoItAlways]

Some good posts on this thread.

But DJMonster, don't drop her right now.

This is your best chance to find out for yourself just how powerful Challenge, Not giving a sh1t, Maintaining the upper hand, Standing your ground like a man, really works with a girl in a LTR.

Let her know (through your actions not your words, don't SAY anything) that you now have serious doubts about the relationship and are seriously considering other options. That you have decided you are better than her and deserve a better girl. I emphasize through your actions, don't tip your hand verbally.

Just watch how much this turn-around (which chicks do to us all the time) will affect her. When you see how powerful this affect is in real life, it will help you so much in your next LTR.

You can do whatever you want after that.