Is it too much to ask her out again?

[James184]

So,I have been talking to this girl.Last week I asked her out but she said that she could not because she had just left town.I told her that this week I will be spending time off work so I would be available any time of the day all week and we can do anything we want,to which she replied yes.

She comes back and we have another talk and just as I was ready to ask her out the following day she tells me she will leave town again.I decide to ask her out on the same day to which she was negative telling me that she has to get ready and pack her things again,which I understand however I won't lie to you I was a bit disappointed.

Today I texted her not knowing she came back.However I was a bit hesitant to ask her out for a 3rd time so I decided to post here to gain some insight.Should I make the effort to ask her out again?

 

[TheGambino]

You should never tell a girl you are free every night of the week. Then you appear like you don't have women around you, that you don't have friends, that you don't have sh1t to do. Even if you are free every night, pick 2 days and give her 1 to choose from. Or ask HER which day she's free. Never first date on a saturday night too, that will appear like you have nothing going on in your life too. I would chill back and relax with this one, wait a couple of days if she texts you, if she doesn't call her and ask her out.

 

[James184]

Don't waste your time, let her do the communicating if she really wants to talk to you.

She was the one initiating the conversation most of the time.The only time I decided to text her first was today.

 

[James184]

You should never tell a girl you are free every night of the week. Then you appear like you don't have women around you, that you don't have friends, that you don't have sh1t to do. Even if you are free every night, pick 2 days and give her 1 to choose from. Or ask HER which day she's free. Never first date on a saturday night too, that will appear like you have nothing going on in your life too. I would chill back and relax with this one, wait a couple of days if she texts you, if she doesn't call her and ask her out.

I actually don't have that much time.I am only free up to Sunday,next week my schedule is full plus I have a date with another girl planned next Tuesday.However I would really like to know if this one is not worth my time before proceeding to the next one and for that to happen we have to go on a date I reckon.

 

[TheGambino]

I actually don't have that much time.I am only free up to Sunday,next week my schedule is full plus I have a date with another girl planned next Tuesday.However I would really like to know if this one is not worth my time before proceeding to the next one and for that to happen we have to go on a date I reckon.

Don't tell me that bro. Just don't let her know that you have nothing to do every night of the week and don't say we can do whatever. Make specific plans to do, girls want guys that have a night planned out. I suggest that you read the DJ Bible and then ask questions mate. Not being rude just trying to help.

 

[ZTIME]

I actually don't have that much time.I am only free up to Sunday,next week my schedule is full plus I have a date with another girl planned next Tuesday.However I would really like to know if this one is not worth my time before proceeding to the next one and for that to happen we have to go on a date I reckon.

I would suggest pursuing things to do this weekend. Hook up with some friends, hit the beach, go to the gym, visit family, climb a mountain, hike a trail, hit up a bar with a buddy, etc. etc. etc.

This chick just got back in to town. You've had to be stalking her a bit to get that info.

Why not wait to see her interest level and see if she texts you. If she does, she'll probably ask "what are you up to this weekend"?

Your reply of course will be the list that ZTIME provided above. Now you'll look more attractive. Invite her to one of the items listed above at a specific place and time.

Be blessed little brother and take Gambino's advice and read the DJ bible. He's here to help not wait for you to validate your boring weekend.

 

[JohnChops]

You told her when you were free. Bad. You did not ask when she was free and for her into your schedule. You did not ask her out with a specific date time and place. You can learn from this

 

[Yewki]

Should I make the effort to ask her out again?

Generally no, do not ask out a girl a third time who turned you down the last two times with no counter

You made your interest clear. If she's interested, she knows to contact you. If not, then who cares. Either way you save yourself the hassle and don't make yourself look weak. Win-win

The moment you sacrifice your dignity for a chance to be with a girl, you've lost. Doesn't matter if you ask a 1000 times, and on the 1000th time she finally says yes

 

[guru1000]

These days, I ask a woman out once ... once.

 

[pyros]

My rule is:
I just ask women out ONCE, and cease contact.
But, if after this they initiate contact (maybe it's a week later, or three months later) AND SEEM INTERESTED I may ask them out again. If they give me whatever excuse I do not ask them out ever again.

In your case, I wouldn't ask her out again.

 

[Konada]

A simple case of failure to lead.

As a man, you must be comfortable with leading and asking to get the things that you want. Never leave things up to the hands of others because you are not in control of your fate.

Whenever I leave things to people to 'let me know', they never get back to me. For reference sake, this is how I set up dates hassle free:

Me: <Small talk>
Her: Blah blah
Me: Cool, what nights are you free this week?
Her: <days she is free>
Me: Alright, let's meet at XYZ bar on <day she is free and you are as well> at xx pm. Sounds good?

If she says she isn't free this week and proposes a counteroffer (next week perhaps?, NEXT TIME does not count), give her the benefit of the doubt and ask her out again a week later (if you are still interested)

 

[dude99]

So,I have been talking to this girl.Last week I asked her out but she said that she could not because she had just left town.I told her that this week I will be spending time off work so I would be available any time of the day all week and we can do anything we want,to which she replied yes.

She comes back and we have another talk and just as I was ready to ask her out the following day she tells me she will leave town again.I decide to ask her out on the same day to which she was negative telling me that she has to get ready and pack her things again,which I understand however I won't lie to you I was a bit disappointed.

Today I texted her not knowing she came back.However I was a bit hesitant to ask her out for a 3rd time so I decided to post here to gain some insight.Should I make the effort to ask her out again?

No counter offer in her part. Asking her a 3rd time is only setting your self up for rejection

 

[dude99]

These days, I ask a woman out once ... once.

Good plan. They know why you are asking. They aren't stupid. If they don't counter offer then asking more than once is a waste of effort and time.

 

[marmel75]

I actually don't have that much time.I am only free up to Sunday,next week my schedule is full plus I have a date with another girl planned next Tuesday.However I would really like to know if this one is not worth my time before proceeding to the next one and for that to happen we have to go on a date I reckon.

Then stop going out of your way to make things work with a random chick you've never dated. It's painfully obvious to her you have no options which is the most unattractive trait you could display. This is going nowhere.

Stop wasting your time and find more women to date.

 

[James184]

I see your point.No need to set myself up for another rejection so i'll let this one pass unless she initiates and proposes a counter-offer for a date.Also,never tell a girl when I am free rather ask her when she is.Really appreciate the advice mates!

 

[Floydispink01]

A simple case of failure to lead.

As a man, you must be comfortable with leading and asking to get the things that you want. Never leave things up to the hands of others because you are not in control of your fate.

Whenever I leave things to people to 'let me know', they never get back to me. For reference sake, this is how I set up dates hassle free:

Me: <Small talk>
Her: Blah blah
Me: Cool, what nights are you free this week?
Her: <days she is free>
Me: Alright, let's meet at XYZ bar on <day she is free and you are as well> at xx pm. Sounds good?

If she says she isn't free this week and proposes a counteroffer (next week perhaps?, NEXT TIME does not count), give her the benefit of the doubt and ask her out again a week later (if you are still interested)

Great advice

I had a girl flake on me the other week but offered a reschedule. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and set up a date the following week.

The morning of the date she told me she was ill and will let me know me know later if she will make it.

I told her - 'I'm going to need a better answer than that Claire. Yes or no?'

She said no and was all apologetic saying she will make it up to me. I tossed her away and didn't respond.

The following week she texted me out of the blue and asked if we could meet. Agreed, took her out and had a great time.

I showed no emotion through her whole bvll****. I expect flaking from women. I expect a Girl to drop off the face of the earth after I've banged her also. It's all part of the game.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Great advice

I had a girl flake on me the other week but offered a reschedule. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and set up a date the following week.

The morning of the date she told me she was ill and will let me know me know later if she will make it.

I told her - 'I'm going to need a better answer than that Claire. Yes or no?'

You did the right thing by tossing the number, but this calls for a negative sale. You don't force an answer directly, you withdraw the offer to psychologically stimulate her fear of loss. If she cares, she will keep the date. If she doesn't, you have your answer.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I ask a woman out twice. If she doesn't accept offer #1, I wait about two weeks and try again before deleting her number. Sometimes the timing just isn't right. Especially in the early game, women have volatile level interest. You could be the second, third, or even fourth option at first but get bumped up when the other men screw up.

The point is not to protect your ego. You can't sell this babe if you don't get in front of her. I've had several "bleh" first dates from women that ended up with them having a good time and chasing me after.

 

[RangerMIke]

It's okay to ask her when she is free, but you should NEVER be free all week. I'm not saying to lie.... but go out and get busy, make plans with friends.

 

[RangerMIke]

Great advice

I had a girl flake on me the other week but offered a reschedule. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and set up a date the following week.

The morning of the date she told me she was ill and will let me know me know later if she will make it.

I told her - 'I'm going to need a better answer than that Claire. Yes or no?'

She said no and was all apologetic saying she will make it up to me. I tossed her away and didn't respond.

The following week she texted me out of the blue and asked if we could meet. Agreed, took her out and had a great time.

I showed no emotion through her whole bvll****. I expect flaking from women. I expect a Girl to drop off the face of the earth after I've banged her also. It's all part of the game.

This is exactly how you should handle women. Although I would not demand a better answer. Never accept a possible date, if she will not say yes or no just tell her another time and walk away, if she likes you she will reach out.