Is it really easier to meet women if you live in urban environment?

[oc16]

I don't live out in rural rustic area, but I don't live in an urban area either.

When you are in a city or even a town with a great downtown, everywhere you turn there is trim. They are walking down your street, in the coffee shop, etc.

Where I live ; you have to get in a car to go anywhere. I have pretty much given up on the bars, since they generally don't work as far as meeting people.

I am about an 1 hour 15 minutes from Philly and 1.5 hours from NYC. Even on bumble, most of the attractive women are close to the cities or in the cities and are only looking for men within a 15 mile radius.

Is there any truth to this? You live in an urban setting or very close to one; it's a lot easier to meet women or no?

 

[SW15]

Short answer: Yes, it is easier to meet women in an urban environment but it doesn't mean you'll achieve your relational goals easier.

Urban women will actively try to discourage approaches through earbuds at the gym, on walking paths/the street, and sometimes even at the grocery store. They are plentiful on swipe apps, but often don't take interactions further than "one date, no sex, no second date".

If a metro area has a population of less than 150,000, it will be very difficult to date after 25. If you happen to find yourself in one of these areas, you'd better hope you are in a secure LTR your high school/college sweetheart. Once that relationship ends, you'll need to move to a more populated area.

Some of the best metro areas for dating are 150,000 - 700,000 in population. Big enough to have enough choices, small enough that the women won't be overly selective due to countless options.

Wherever you are, your social circle is one of the best determinants of success. A guy with a strong social circle in a metro area of 200,000 will have better interactions with women than a guy with no social circle in a metro area of 5 million. The guy with no social circle or a weak circle in a metro area of 5 million will need swipe apps and cold approaching, which are two very difficult paths.

 

[BMX]

I don't know anyone willingly moving into a large city right now. Maybe they're catching on and finally realizing losing their life and personal property aren't a great trade for 'dried up p-sleeve'.

You've got these metro area women with their earbuds in, and failing that, they are out with their groups of friends from childhood who have never left the city, ever. If you are a transplant or just visiting for the weekend, they really don't want anything to do with you. Maybe they will go one date with you for the novel experience and then put you in a vast friendzone (read: loose, useless network) they tend to keep. I doubt you have time for that sh!t. If they have social media, and they will, it will be chock full of betas they friendzoned in the same city. These women clearly stayed for the professional opportunities and the solid fact that they can't spit their mother's teat out of their mouth. So you'll get the career-oriented types who are basically narcissistic dudes who lack any sense of personal responsibility. All they know is the rat race they got stuck in and you will just be thrown into the mix and forgotten. They were a smash or two at best. I moved to a big city briefly 10 years ago. It was a farce and glad I got the fk out/saw the writing on the wall. Grape and pillaging are the wave of the (immediate) future for those types of places.

 

[Robert28]

Fvck city living women. I’ll stick with my country girls that wear cowboy boots and short dresses and tight ass wrangler jeans that would give your 80 yr old grandpa a hardon.

 

[Lookatu]

Yes. I live in the burbs due to my kids but my plates are in the city. Every time I go in the city, there are tons of single and available poon on the streets with a lot of IOI's.

 

[oc16]

Yes. I live in the burbs due to my kids but my plates are in the city. Every time I go in the city, there are tons of single and available poon on the streets with a lot of IOI's.

lol, it would be nice to be able to just walk out your door and their is ***** everywhere.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Yes. It’s simple math. There are a lot more single people in major cities than rural towns.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

100% yes it is better to live in the city.

When I was divorced, I was in the burbs. It was an island. The women in the burbs were nearly all overweight and 4's acted like they were 9's. I VERY rarely saw women I would want to approach. During my ~1 year stint on Tinder/Bumble immediately after my divorce, all the girls I'd match with would live in the city so I was driving a ways to get to them and that made it even worse when they'd flake/ghost me after I drove all that way. Just maddening. Also girls have so many options that many set their radius REALLY short - like even 3-5 miles. They have so much abundance that they don't need to set their radius any higher than that.

I sold my house and bought a place in the city and it was life changing. Although I don't use OLD any more, I cold approach all the time out here and I can literally walk or drive 5 minutes and be in a crowded area full of women. There are more single women in the city than the burbs, and they tend to be more in shape. I can almost NEVER go to a brewery in the city and not see at least one approachable girl, or Target, Trader Joes, or Whole Foods in the city and not see at least 3+ approachable girls. They are much more open to talking too. I got off on a REALLY bad foot in my cold approach game in the 'burbs because I was getting rejected constantly. I learned it wasn't so much bad technique but just the difference between women in the 'burbs vs the city.

I disagree with the comments about city women all being liberal, or that all liberal women are bad options for dating. Just like everything, political, moral, and ideological positions are on a sliding scale. True, I myself would never date a third wave feminist or a girl who was a hardcore liberal, but I would say most of the girls I've dated have been moderate or slightly left of center and I didn't have any issues with them that could be traced back to their views (with the exception of my ex wife from before I became red pill aware).

I do recognize and understand the appeal and draw of small town women, however, that's not really the 'burbs. That's more of a rural situation. And while some of these old fashioned girls may be really good relationship material, you have to live in the country and you also have VERY little choice due to the low populations. Also, they aren't always all they are cracked up to be. I've dated a 23yo southern belle before and she had only one sexual partner (and she said she never enjoyed the sex with him and felt forced by him to do it), and was the kind of women who would refer to sex as "the dirty deed" (she didn't say that but you get my point). Some of these small town religious conservative girls have been brought up to think sex is a bad thing.

 

[Lookatu]

I disagree with the comments about city women all being liberal, or that all liberal women are bad options for dating. Just like everything, political, moral, and ideological positions are on a sliding scale.

Agree.

In my experience, females having that herd mentality will claim themselves to be liberal when they really aren't, to any extreme. A lot of them are often confused or lost and just need the right leadership to get them to see different perspectives.

I've dated the most hardcore "feminists" and had some enlightening moments when they broke down and told me they seek a male to lead them in life.

So bottom line is don't discount any females just because they identify themselves as liberal, feminist, etc. Give yourself a chance to find out what they're really about and where in that sliding scale they're at.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

I've dated the most hardcore "feminists" and had some enlightening moments when they broke down and told me they seek a male to lead them in life.

While I haven't had this exact experience (from a hardcore feminist anyway), I can absolutely relate because most of the left-of-center women I dated have admitted similar things to me and when I would do deep-dives into their beliefs and opinions on certain things, they were quite against third wave feminism. These are women who hated Trump but would also say that they feel men and women have different strengths, aren't equal in all areas, and sometimes they need to be "put in their place" and that they like men to make decisions on many things - not because they are incapable but because they just prefer it (like not having to decide where to go to eat or where to go on a trip) etc. Some would also say things like, "I hate it when a guy lets me walk all over him - stand up for yourself!" in referring to some past relationships or dating situations.

I think most women consider themselves feminists because they want equal pay for equal work, they want the right to choose, the right to vote, equal rights, and things like that - the ORIGINAL feminism. But when it gets into third wave feminism, most women don't have those opinions (not the ones I meet or know anyway). But most women don't even know the difference between feminism and third wave feminism, so this gets to your point about their confusion.

 

[Barrister]

While I haven't had this exact experience (from a hardcore feminist anyway), I can absolutely relate because most of the left-of-center women I dated have admitted similar things to me and when I would do deep-dives into their beliefs and opinions on certain things, they were quite against third wave feminism. These are women who hated Trump but would also say that they feel men and women have different strengths, aren't equal in all areas, and sometimes they need to be "put in their place" and that they like men to make decisions on many things - not because they are incapable but because they just prefer it (like not having to decide where to go to eat or where to go on a trip) etc. Some would also say things like, "I hate it when a guy lets me walk all over him - stand up for yourself!" in referring to some past relationships or dating situations.

I think most women consider themselves feminists because they want equal pay for equal work, they want the right to choose, the right to vote, equal rights, and things like that - the ORIGINAL feminism. But when it gets into third wave feminism, most women don't have those opinions (not the ones I meet or know anyway). But most women don't even know the difference between feminism and third wave feminism, so this gets to your point about their confusion.

The problem is that the conditioning these women have experienced to be "independent" many times will override their feminine nature. Some days you will get them wanting to supplicate to you and be led, then the next they are trying to wear the pants and test your frame because they think it is what they should be doing since our society tells women how its all due to toxic masculinity that the man is "in charge" in the first place.

I think deep down they want to be led. This is natural. But the social conditioning is very difficult to break.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

The problem is that the conditioning these women have experienced to be "independent" many times will override their feminine nature. Some days you will get them wanting to supplicate to you and be led, then the next they are trying to wear the pants and test your frame because they think it is what they should be doing since our society tells women how its all due to toxic masculinity that the man is "in charge" in the first place.

I think deep down they want to be led. This is natural. But the social conditioning is very difficult to break.

I completely agree. I never thought I'd reach a point in life where I sounded "old" by saying so many things are in decline due to societal changes but here I am. And I truly believe it.

 

[Paper Crane]

I would say its pretty obvious -- the more people in a place, the easier it is to meet them.