Is it beta to open a car door for women

Barrister

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Opening a door is a form of chivalry when it comes to people in general. It also demonstrates leadership when it comes to women specifically. Anytime you are ushering a woman in a physical or nonphysical way to go a certain place, there is an undercurrent of your dominance over her. By opening the door, you are non-verbally telling her to go a certain place. If you are on a date, this kind of thing immediately begins building sexual tension, albeit in small amounts.
 

BeExcellent

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My fiancé opens car doors & opens entry doors all the time. In fact he kinda has me trained to wait for him to open a door… he often pulls out my chair (where he is directing me to sit by doing so) and carries heavy things for me. He is quite masculine, one of the reasons I love him, and he is very protective. Chivalry and manners are sexy. Those little things make a girl feel cared for and looked after and valued. I tell my man sometimes that I greatly appreciate the way he naturally does those things for me.

My son does these things too. For me, for his lady. He was raised that way.

And my son is a very self assured masculine young man.
 

Gamisch

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Opening a door is a form of chivalry when it comes to people in general. It also demonstrates leadership when it comes to women specifically. Anytime you are ushering a woman in a physical or nonphysical way to go a certain place, there is an undercurrent of your dominance over her. By opening the door, you are non-verbally telling her to go a certain place. If you are on a date, this kind of thing immediately begins building sexual tension, albeit in small amounts.
Perfect description.
 

Dr.Suave

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Chivalry and manners are sexy.
Sure, if the girl was already attracted to the guy in the first place. Its the same for girls who speak multiple languages and have a Ph.D and whatnot. I find that stuff very sexy if she already passed the boner test. If she didnt pass the boner test, no amount Ph.Ds is going to change that.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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I never have, mainly because I don't think women are special, I view them and treat them like I would anyone else. Women scream they want independance and equality, but still want chivalry as well? You can't have it both ways. If they act traditionally feminine, (ie submissive/agreeable, kind/warm-hearted, loyal, etc) then of course I'd love to treat them like a queen. I certainly won't just do this by default, just like respect has to be earned so does chivalry, etc.
 
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BeExcellent

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Sure, if the girl was already attracted to the guy in the first place. Its the same for girls who speak multiple languages and have a Ph.D and whatnot. I find that stuff very sexy if she already passed the boner test. If she didnt pass the boner test, no amount Ph.Ds is going to change that.
You missed the point entirely. Chivalry and manners are sexy, Period.

It is sexy to see a man do those things for his lady, irrespective of whether or not I have any interest in the dude (I don’t; I’m very taken)….

It displays dominance, as @Barrister stated and it displays class. And it does so through action.

Masculinity is sexy. Period.

It’s not a matter of personal opinion.

If your date doesn’t appreciate good manners & chivalry? She’s not the type woman you want anyway. Believe me.
 

Dr.Suave

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You missed the point entirely.

If your date doesn’t appreciate good manners & chivalry? She’s not the type woman you want anyway. Believe me.
Im not so sure. Have you read my thread on Crazy Betty? Its currently on my signature. She always appreaciated manners & chivarly. Big whoop, she had some green flags here and there but she was an absolute nightmare.
 

BeExcellent

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Im not so sure. Have you read my thread on Crazy Betty? Its currently on my signature. She always appreaciated manners & chivarly. Big whoop, she had some green flags here and there but she was an absolute nightmare.
It’s sexy. Yes. Listen darling. You still have to pick the correct girl. Can a girl be bat nuts crazy and appreciate chivalry? Yes. Can a girl be sane and appreciate chivalry? YES!!

Chivalry has a very wide appeal. You still gotta pick decent chicks.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Nope, and in early interactions, opening doors on cars and, in general, also allows kino. Take her hand and help her out of the car. Guide her through the doorway with your hand lightly at the small of her back or the curve of her hip. These are little things, but women do notice them, consciously or subconsciously. Be a man, for chrissakes.

Do you pull out your date's chair for her and scoot it in at the dinner table?
Walk curbside?
Lead her through a busy crowd?
Discuss the meal and order for her when the waiter shows up. "My stunning date would like X."

Nothing wrong with being a gentleman. And with you clueless rubes around, it sets me apart in a good way.

Next time you see a woman your age with a stunningly handsome, debonaire, and cultured Gex-Xer like me, you might remember the things that set us apart.

I guess this happened to young men with no father to learn these things from.
 
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BeExcellent

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@Pierce.Manhammer is right.

Sadly being a real gentleman is becoming a lost art.

The advantage there is that men who cultivate being a gentleman will have more good choices in the long run.

Just the old lady’s $0.02
 

Gamisch

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Always be a gentleman. Gentleman and “weak beta simp” are not synonymous.
Its rather the other way around. Just like "nice guys " are actually " passive aggressive and vengeful guys " who are the opposite of nice.

Just like being a gentleman can't be done without being a strong man. Again, if your chivalrous ways are not appreciated, you're dealing with a toxic woman. Not saying that you cany ride with a toxic one...
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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I was at the gas station the other day and thus burly Russian dude was standing in front of the gas station in disbelief yelling and screaming at this woman pumping gas.

I get close and he approaches me, "Brusha, what the **** is this? The woman pumps gas while the man drives?" as hes pointing at the guy sitting in the driver seat.

This guy then runs inside to the cashier and goes "Brusha, what happened to your people?! You let a woman pump the gas?!" and him and the cashier left outside to stand there cause this guy was a giant scary Russian dude yelling like somebody was dying.

Somebody was dying, me, of laughter, this Russian dude had the whole store looking at this dude in his Audi while the woman pumped gas, just head down not doing anything, at one point he was smacking on the driver side window and buddy never looked up even once, he was clearly pressed as ****.

I mean, this guy made this huge scene and the woman never once batted an eye, stopped pumping or responded in anyway... In this scenario, this was clearly a cultural thing and I guess that is the answer, you open or don't open her door depending on where you are, what your culture is. Maybe dude caught heat after I couldn't say but I doubt it.
 

We_ArE_VeNOM

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I don’t know why, but it just looks so cringey when I see a guy do it. Especially when he goes out of the way to do it and the woman looks low value/trashy lol.
A made man in the Mafia can kill 3 guys in a day, but when he takes his lady out on a date the SAME NIGHT, he is still enough of a gentleman to hold the car door open for her.

Naw, it ain't beta.

And personally, if the woman passes my sh!t test, then she has earned that side of me.
 

BillyPilgrim

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A made man in the Mafia can kill 3 guys in a day, but when he takes his lady out on a date the SAME NIGHT, he is still enough of a gentleman to hold the car door open for her.

Naw, it ain't beta.

And personally, if the woman passes my sh!t test, then she has earned that side of me.
And, if she's super stacked, she may need help getting those titties inside the car.
 

I_have_BDE

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Might as well extend the question to: can you be oldschool courteous with modern women? Yes.

There's a plethora of things men supposedly did ,or must do for women while especially the manosphere teaches men NOT to do them anymore. Things like:
-buying gifts
-buying flowers
-paying dates
-spoiling women
-be vocally romantic
-your example: opening doors, giving your jacket when it cold,
-be protective


All these things should come naturally imo. Its baffling that men teach eachother this bs and then wonder why they can't get women. Let me say this: seemingly small stuff like this might work against you if its coupled with too much other weak behaviour, or when you try to compensate or tryhard. But when you are a stand up guy it will actually make you look even better.e.g Pablo Escobar might've been a extremely courteous and romantic man. Yet everybody knew he would kill a man without blinking his eyes.

I don't say you must check every box on that list, because that's a personal matter. You decide what's the ideal image of yourself.

If not doing these things means she "respects" you more you're dealing with a extremely difficult and toxic one. I wonder why would you even question this?
I don't have an issue paying for dates if you're the one asking HER out. However not over the top first few dates.
 

SW15

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The advantage there is that men who cultivate being a gentleman will have more good choices in the long run.
Difficult to say. A lot of men who treat women decently are crapped on in the mating market. This is why sayings like "nice guys finish last" and "azzholes finish first" exist.

There are multiple variables at play. It is true that there are men who don't treat women like complete shiit who get sent to the rejection pile. We are in a mating environment today where the average woman wants nothing to do with the average man.

This thread started yesterday discussed an average looking woman with a big career dismissing her SMV equivalents in favor of seeking top tier men.


The opening of car doors and of building doors is mostly irrelevant to getting laid and to forming relationships. Because there are multiple variables at play, other variables matter far more.
 

Murk

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I don’t know why, but it just looks so cringey when I see a guy do it. Especially when he goes out of the way to do it and the woman looks low value/trashy lol.
I see a guy that lives opposite me do this daily, it makes me sick/cringe. He's a walking slave in my eyes. They have hands and arms don't they? What are you trying to prove? You bought the car already and are about to chauffeur the broad aren't you? To me your work is done.

Yes unless you are a parking attendant.
Treat her like a celeberty and she will treat you like a fan.
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