is being friends w girls overrated?

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,302
Reaction score
11,271
There are not that many unless you're getting social circle introductions that lead to meaningful medium to long term relationships.
 

Bingo-Player

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 10, 2014
Messages
3,383
Reaction score
3,870
Location
uk
Defenitley helps to peer behind the curtain and taken them off the pedestal

Don't forget we usually only get to the see the highly polished version of women in the bar on in the gym etc

Women when their in a comfortable environment behave and appear A LOT differently

Wait until you see you start seeing women in a onesie/oodie and fluffy socks with no makeup on .......Its a sobering experience

listening to them talk amongst each other is also pretty sobering , men are usually discussed as if they are chess pieces or cameo characters in her movie

There are also other benefits.... women do like matchmake especially for their freinds and most women prefer to date men that have been referred

Doesn't always play out but you can defenitley get pu$$y / dates from having female friends
 

PlatoPacks23

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 23, 2023
Messages
338
Reaction score
119
Defenitley helps to peer behind the curtain and taken them off the pedestal

Don't forget we usually only get to the see the highly polished version of women in the bar on in the gym etc

Women when their in a comfortable environment behave and appear A LOT differently

Wait until you see you start seeing women in a onesie/oodie and fluffy socks with no makeup on .......Its a sobering experience

listening to them talk amongst each other is also pretty sobering , men are usually discussed as if they are chess pieces or cameo characters in her movie

There are also other benefits.... women do like matchmake especially for their freinds and most women prefer to date men that have been referred

Doesn't always play out but you can defenitley get pu$$y / dates from having female friends
yeah that's a great point.

idk seems tricky and has to work from a certain point.
 

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
8,101
Reaction score
4,712
Location
Eastern Time Zone where it's always really late
I would give it a net positive.

1. There is zero pressure. You aren’t trying to impress them, and they aren’t trying to impress you. So it’s actually really chill.

2. You get to see how women really are when they aren’t putting on an act. (This is especially helpful if you don’t have a sister.) And they will talk to you with zero filter once they’re comfortable enough, so you’ll learn exactly how they think and what they share with their girl friends. Some of it will be gross TMI lol. Some of it will be about her with other dudes, but that goes with the territory.

3. Good for your conversational skills. It’s super easy practice for shy or introverted guys.

Don’t expect them to set you up with other women though. That’s not my experience. They will only tell me about some chick that secretly liked me or was asking about me 10 or 15 years ago.
 
Last edited:

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,302
Reaction score
11,271
You get to see how women really are when they aren’t putting on an act. (This is especially helpful if you don’t have a sister.)

Don’t expect them to set you up with other women though. That’s not my experience.
It's better for a male to have a sister or a female cousin (one he regularly interacts with -- not always true with cousins) than platonic female friends.

As adults, an adult male would be more likely to get an introduction from a similarly aged sister or female cousin if he lives in the same area as compared to a female friend.

A female friend is worthwhile for getting introductions. There's enough material on the internet/social media that tells a man how women really are when they aren't putting on an act. A man that scours the internet well will find that information.

Good for your conversational skills. It’s super easy practice for shy or introverted guys.
That's possible for men who are really needing help with their social skills. Again, a sister or female cousin is a better option for this. Younger males are more prone to have issues with conversational skills, but I can see how this could happen in an older male too.
 

CornbreadFed

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 7, 2023
Messages
3,190
Reaction score
2,468
Age
30
Location
Nashville, TN
I think it is completely beneficial as long as you aren't being a stubborn pushover manipulative nice guy male trying to sell time for sex.

1). It keeps you around other women and prevents you from entering into the Incel/RP territory which fvcks you up mentally

2). It social proofs in front of other women when y'all are out in public.

3). Girls are easier to get along with and you are not competing with them for the same resources unlike men. Men have the potential to betray, humiliate, or abandon you over some pvssy. The worse thing your female friends can do is go ghost on you during her honey moon phase with Chad.
 

BaronOfHair

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 14, 2024
Messages
2,578
Reaction score
1,091
Age
35
It's fine, so long as you remember that men and women CANNOT be friends with in the same way we are with those of the same gender. Chicks aren't exaggerating when they describe their friendships with each other as "complicated"...
 

holidayad_

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2022
Messages
234
Reaction score
216
Age
25
Guys wrote a lot of good points here. And I agree with most of them.

I am just not sure if it’s something that it’s sustainable in the long run…
 

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
3,571
Reaction score
4,364
Preferably a woman with less smv than you have. A woman who fancies you "secretly" but YOU friendzoned her. On top of that there's something else that benefits you, I'm thinking money /bizz wise.

I am friends with some lesbo chicks. Zero sexual tension. Can drink a beer with them and go out with them acting the fool.

But...as soon as you wanna hit it..then forget about it. She'll use you as orbiter nr 234, and probably gives you a specific role. E.g "the cab driver, the emotional tampon, the money loaner " ect. Women are ruthless when it comes to using men.

I am rather introverted and work 7 days a week so I don't have time for (female) friends. But I have to admit that the socially stronger version of me wouldn't mind also having female friends because they can bring me tons of customers.
 

Lotus Effect

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2013
Messages
747
Reaction score
267
Age
36
Location
Lisbon
Good post.

Short answer:
No, it is not overrated.

*Disclaimer*
All the chicks I'm friends with are chicks that I have not went for romantically, have or had no intention on doing so, and straight upfront placed them on my friendzone, and not otherwise.

Long answer:
You should definetly go for female friends.

Since I moved Lisbon, I stablished friendship with four chicks.

Kath, brazilian, 27, single, yoga instructor, 8
Steph, brazilian, 33, single, marketeer, 7
Nara, brazilian, 37, married, artist, 6 (this girl I know from Uni in Brazil)
Ksusha, ukrainian, 31, dating, headhunter, 9 bombshell.

Each one plays a role, but, ideally I agree with this guy:
Stop thinking in terms of "should I do X to get Y" and just live your life.

Be friends with those who bring benefit to your life, and you theirs.

Don't overthink it.
Anywho, going back to the point.

Kath is a marauder, she is basically a dude, fvcks non stop, multiple partners, knows the city and cool places.

With her, I get the benefit of social proof whenever I go, and since she is always default in a hunting demeanor, we kinda game other chicks using her as my pawn. Furthermore, more often than planned, she shows me to new places, whereas are good bouncing places for dating, or good places for approaches. And most specially, she is a gatekeeper, so I'm always meeeting new people through her.

Steph lives in the beach, so whenever I'm in a beachy mood, I have a friend to go with me. Same gatekeeping rules as above apply in the beach city/enviroment.

Nara is like my big sis, she lives in another city, but she is always looking after me, and cares about my well being. It's good to have this kind of relationship, because sometimes, you need a pat in the back. Aside from that, since she lives in another city, so again same gatekkeping rules apply as above.

And Ksusha is my coworker, so we have long conversations throughtout the day. She being super hot is very educational for me as an insight on the (desirable) women mindset. I've learned and understood so much just by having this convos with her. The ammount of guys lining up for her is unbelievable, with all kinds of approaches, gifts, money, trips, cars... all that.

Its like being an insider, so all the things that we all know as mokey branching, hypergamy, and such really clicks when you see it firsthand. It is also helpful to understand how broken and damaged they can be/become. She is in a relationship with a guy, but still getting all these things from these other guys, even going into trips, so its an experience on the moddern woman. Anyways, she is fun to hang out, and even so with all these crazy sh!t she still holds family values and is very caring. Again, very educational.

--

Bottomline, as guy friends, where some are just for partying, some are your best mates, some are the sunday football team and whatever, the same rule applies for girls...

...If, you go zero interest from the get go.

But, with girls, you always get the benefit of the social proof.

If you are hanging out with hot chicks, than it must mean that you know how to deal with hot chicks, that you are not socially awkward and you are safer to approach. With the extra benefit of social circling.

Cheers! ;)
 
Last edited:

CornbreadFed

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 7, 2023
Messages
3,190
Reaction score
2,468
Age
30
Location
Nashville, TN
I just want to re-emphasize my social proof point. Having a woman or women around you especially hotter women validates you in other women's eyes. Women can sniff out Incels and Fvck boys in guys like a hound can sniff peanut butter, so having female friends eliminates this process for her. In addition, I have never heard of an incel or sexually repressed male with female friends, so I do see a correlation. If you can't even manage a friendship with a female, how can you manage sexual attraction?
 

pipeman84

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
1,440
Reaction score
1,873
Age
40
Location
Europe
I think this is the best point made in the thread so far:
There's enough material on the internet/social media that tells a man how women really are when they aren't putting on an act. A man that scours the internet well will find that information.
I just want to re-emphasize my social proof point. Having a woman or women around you especially hotter women validates you in other women's eyes.
The counter argument I'd like to present is that when threads are started about the desired traits of quality/marriage material women, somewhere in top 5 - no male friends - is listed. So we know deep down that women with male friends are generally speaking low quality. Are those women the kind of social proof you want? :rolleyes:
 

Barrister

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 28, 2018
Messages
2,488
Reaction score
4,236
Age
38
Women "friends" are worth having for social proof and typically nothing more. I say typically because there are exceptions but they are very rare. Most women will only be your friend if they are single. Once they enter into a relationship you won't see them except in very limited circumstances and only then when it is with the man. This will also change how they interact with you.

Secondly, women are always looking for some type of advantage from their relationships. Whether that is validation, social proof for themselves (if you are a successful guy), etc., they typically want something out of your relationship. Unlike men, where we become friends because we genuinely find each other interesting and challenging (thought provoking) and enjoy each other's company. I have had a couple of female, platonic friendships in my life that I truly felt challenged me and had a lot of worth - but for the most part most of these have been rewarding only on a social proof scale and nothing more.

Last, many times men are friends for life (even if you have periods where you fall out of contact and then back into contact). Friendships with women, at least in my experience, are short-lived typically. No more than whatever circumstance is keeping you in proximity to each other exists (job, social circle, etc.).

Women friends offer a unique perspective that can be beneficial to men - red pilled or otherwise. I do agree with @SW15 that a sister or female cousin is preferable for this because you don't have to worry about ulterior motives for the friendship being the only thing that holds you together while still getting that perspective you crave.
 

Lotus Effect

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2013
Messages
747
Reaction score
267
Age
36
Location
Lisbon
The counter argument I'd like to present is that when threads are started about the desired traits of quality/marriage material women, somewhere in top 5 - no male friends - is listed. So we know deep down that women with male friends are generally speaking low quality. Are those women the kind of social proof you want? :rolleyes:
But your argument is based on the fact that deep down you have other intentions for these girls.

If you have no intention with them whatsoever, then what does it matter their quality as gf/ltr matterial for you? The answer should be none!

Since the answer is none, then yes, I want a hot chick hanging by my side for social proof.
 

pipeman84

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
1,440
Reaction score
1,873
Age
40
Location
Europe
But your argument is based on the fact that deep down you have other intentions for these girls.

If you have no intention with them whatsoever, then what does it matter their quality as gf/ltr matterial for you? The answer should be none!

Since the answer is none, then yes, I want a hot chick hanging by my side for social proof.
What kind of social proof is it if I have by my side a hoe? Or a dumb woman who through the way she acts/talks is going to embarrass me?
Furthermore, why do we need to be validated by having a hot chick by our side? Are we high school boys or mature men?
 
Top