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is arranging a date by text after 2 days too soon?

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pete101

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i know generally the rule is if you call then wait 2 days minimum i.e. get the number on sunday call wednesday, but with texting they say do it 2 days after i.e. on the tuesday (but that's not directly to ask her out, but to build rapport) if im going to just straight ask her out via text is 2 days too soon?

she's working long hours and if i call she most likely wont pick up (because she works in a casino with odd hours every day) also i dont want to wait for a call back cos i might be busy and cant take the call either. so texting makes it easier and saves time. plus by the time she calls me back it might be closer to the weekend and i dont want to arrange a date for a weekend but a weeknight to reduce flaking plus i dont want it to stretch till next week when the IL may have gone down. if i got the number on sunday is texting today too soon?
 
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Iceberg

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No. Definitely not too soon.
 
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pete101

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ok but would it be better if i waited one more day to send it or does it really make little or no difference?
 
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thevilittletroll

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if its a cold approach situation the sooner the better. once ive left the bar i'll text them as soon as i get home, just saying i got home safe. then the next day using some callback humor. proceed from there. if you already know the girl you can wait a little longer.

when you first meet a girl in a bar and get her number, ask yourself how many times has she given her phone number out to another random guy this week? how can i stand out from everyone else?

the reason you want to contact her asap is one, is to make sure she remembers you. she was probably drinking, if you were in a bar. and two, to keep her in the attracted state you put her into when you met. it wears off really fast within a day or two. if she gave her phone number out 3 or 4 times that night and she was drinking, she might not remember at all.

another advantage to texting at the end of the night when you get home is you can turn it into a booty call.
 

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Sandow

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I have to disagree with the consensus here. Girls just seem to hate guys that are pushy or too eager IMO. My thought process is that I don't care, I text her when I can and take her out when I'm free, which isn't always right off the bat. At least make it seem like you have other options. Trust me, this will get her thinking a little bit. Feelings, make em feel. Don't be predictable.

I'm speaking with experience here. I'm naturally really on top of stuff at work and in life, and I always respond to things right away. I guess you can say I lack in patience and when I transferred this into my dating life, it has absolutely back fired on me.
 
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Iceberg

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Sandow said:
I have to disagree with the consensus here. Girls just seem to hate guys that are pushy or too eager IMO. My thought process is that I don't care, I text her when I can and take her out when I'm free, which isn't always right off the bat. At least make it seem like you have other options. Trust me, this will get her thinking a little bit. Feelings, make em feel. Don't be predictable.

I'm speaking with experience here. I'm naturally really on top of stuff at work and in life, and I always respond to things right away. I guess you can say I lack in patience and when I transferred this into my dating life, it has absolutely back fired on me.
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Eh. I contact them when I want to. If that means 1 day after getting the number, then that's what I do. I think it'll take more than one text to appear "pushy and eager".

If you meet a girl on Friday and text her monday saying, "Hey it's Sandow from the party. What are you up to this week. Let's get a drink."....the girl's not gonna be like "Ew. He's so pushy!"

If you make a habit of begging her to come out 5 nights a week, then yeah, that's a different story.

If there's a time when I DO decide to play the "wait and make her sweat" game, it's after the first date. Then, maybe I'll wait like 3 days to check in. But for the first date, I'm just trying to make it happen. Just like Woody Allen said, "90% of life is just showing up." Let's get date#1 out of the way, and THEN worry about strategy.
 
VladPatton

VladPatton

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Go for it man. Make sure you keep the date nice and light and see how it goes from there. Try not to over think it. Good luck.
 
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