Ive taken a few days off this forum..where I wasnt actively reading and posting because I felt that I wasnt being as productive as I could be. In other words I was destroying my self esteem by worrying so much about women and how to game them that I had lost all proper perspective about my life and whats really important to me. I feel better I took this break..and I continue to do so...
What I realized was that didnt want to make the pursuit of women my life, or ruin the best years of my life 19-25 worrying and fretting and forcing tons of information into my head and growing up to think I didnt enjoy my years because I spent them in agony and suffering trying to learn the game. I have a deep unsatisfaction inside me a great emptiness that seems to get filled only when women show me affection and since my 8 month journey I have only gotten into one STR.
I dont want the best years of my life to be ruined and I need and have to some degress found some inner peace, because it kills a man when he tires and cant get what he wants unitl he realizes what he wants is not whats best for him or that it he just isnt good enough or skilled to get what he wants which in my case would be women...I rather still enjoy my time and my life even if it is without women. I can still enjoy some time out with the guys and not worry and fret about how many guys get laid...I feel as if I should stop worrying and just enjoy things even if they are simple...like a walk in the park. I dont think a man should feel bad if he says "so what if I stink with women" or "those guy out there are approaching in clubs and seeing sights and getting tail".. it really doesnt stop me from being happy and enjoying listing to my brother tell me about school or the walk in the park. Yes I might be lonely... but you only get one life...So i choose to live it in happiness rather than sadness. Sadness is stupid...no matter what your circumstances. I rembember tupac said in one of his songs "Even with all this bullsh*t, you still gotta smile and laugh through it" (this is for all the loner guys out there..)
But yet there is some some small part inside me that wants to become a ladies man, and learn the game...but what I really seek from my love life is to have a great and meaningful LTR..and she doesnt have to be a HB 9-10. I am more modest while some may say that I fail to be a DJ, my idea of what a DJ is diffrent from what others may have in their heads. I hate when a person doesnt do anything according to the rules..how he gets flamed for not being a DJ but anyway. Everyone wants to be a Dj so badly, I did, I became obssesed for the last 6 months and I really didnt get anywhere other than a lousy 4 month LTR and no ONS or anything else. I realized that my dream isnt to become a PUA artist or a lay master 5000, I dont want to perfect routines and lines and w/e advacned technique I have. I just hope that I dont have to learn them anyway to find love...in that case all the men not on sosuave are screwed. I dont want to have meaningless flings and sex....but I would only find satisfaction knowing that i could find another women to be in an LTR when I wanted to.
Like I said all i want is a meaningful LTR, I think that a LTR would satisfy me more, because I am the person who cares for love and affection than having as many notches on my belt as I can. I think I would find more satisfaction in having a family with a worthy women and raising up strong independent children and not chase tail or look for getting laid every-week (Right I am so far from that point..but we must know what we are aiming for..well I think). The reason why I stay at sosuave.com is that so I can learn, what I need to know so that in case a LTR doesnt work out, that I can always have the skill to find anohter women who is right for me and build a loving caring relationship all over again. (Anti-Dumps post have been geared toward that direction and I find them really helpful).
I just wish attracting females...meeting them...finding the courage to approach them when all your fears and in my case some social anxiety is screaming no...didnt have to really test a mans metal or rather push him to his limits..finding a life partner or short term lover shouldnt be as hard as getting admitted to law school or becoming a honerable soilder. What Im trying to say is that there are so many men who are so unprepared to deal with females...thats why we have so many AFC's like me...i hope Im a RAFC but who knows. I feel its easier for a man to compete in the olympics or get into law school or charge a hill full of al-queda than to have to deal with everything a man must do to become self-sufficent for himself to meet and find women that he desires rather than sheer dumb luck that most of us meet women with...well im not talking about players and pimps and DJ's like mystery. Men shouldnt have to worry about women to where they revolve so much of their life around improving and refining their approach that they waste so much time that could be used to do other more usefull things..build bridges..buildings..careers..you get my point
We shouldnt have to read self help manuals and go to seminars and spend hours posting and learning things and for those who find the courage to actually apporach (not me) ... they shouldnt have to put up with flaky behavior and play phones games and play hard to get routines. Honestly who feels like a aplha male here? (not me)
But I'll sure as hell become one for women...but see its for women...Everybody does everything for women these days, money, career, attitude, Back when men didnt have such a hard time with women...who cared about being alpha or not...they did what they had to do or what they wanted to in life...they never built there lives around women since it wasnt so difficult to find a life partner or lover. Women did there "job" which was to play the sterotypical role of housewife and men did their "job" of winning the bread for the household and being the protector of the house. After this so called feminist age..roles have been reversed..women dont need men..men dont need women. There is less codependecy of each of the genders. Naturally the only reason you will make an effort to deal with the other gender is for tail or for some comfort and when things get too hard...its easy to jump ship and divorce. This gives women more power and makes women a conscience and grueling effort to work at..who the hell in the 1920's learned to get women..no one.
And now In our day and age...we are safe from danger..harm and risk..man can live a comfortable stable peaceful non confrontational life. This is why I hate the idea of alpha males..because it sounds so stupid and so fake...whenever I hear "be a man". Do you even know what a man is? (Sh*t I dont... but dont tell me you do!) I see posts here trying to define manhood and try to give it essence and shape...people posting things like...men=never scared...men=always tough...NOW where did these guys get these ideas from about alpha males and men and why do we need posts like this and why must we use the stigma of not being called a "man" inspire us to a certain action. Hey xxxposter dont be afc be a "man" is so common... WHY?
The definition of being a man and I dont mean the attitudes... I mean males... the roles that males used to play in past centuries and societies is now called "man" as it also was back then....has become lost and confused. But how many people really have somebody to show them what is "man" This generation of hippies and the baby boomer generation men..the males of those generations have done the boys and men of our age disservice...they did not pass the legacy of being "men" on to us We wouldnt talk about being men if we where so insecure about it ourselves...males are insecure about their masculinty because its meaning and definition has been lost..and we are trying to find it everyday. Who knows what being a real man..we might have some icons that make us believe so..like James Bond...or General Paton but in our lives we are very rarely touched by true masculinity...except by the chemicals called testosterone..men can behave like women..the only diffrence between us is this chemical the rest is up to us to define.
Do you guys realize how much time we spend learning techniques and attiudes just to get women to like us?
What society has done to males is really not fair...I remember that tyler durden even once said in the movie fight club "Men dont fight any wars like those of our forefathers but there is a new war on our masculinity" he said something like that Im not sure.
What I realized was that didnt want to make the pursuit of women my life, or ruin the best years of my life 19-25 worrying and fretting and forcing tons of information into my head and growing up to think I didnt enjoy my years because I spent them in agony and suffering trying to learn the game. I have a deep unsatisfaction inside me a great emptiness that seems to get filled only when women show me affection and since my 8 month journey I have only gotten into one STR.
I dont want the best years of my life to be ruined and I need and have to some degress found some inner peace, because it kills a man when he tires and cant get what he wants unitl he realizes what he wants is not whats best for him or that it he just isnt good enough or skilled to get what he wants which in my case would be women...I rather still enjoy my time and my life even if it is without women. I can still enjoy some time out with the guys and not worry and fret about how many guys get laid...I feel as if I should stop worrying and just enjoy things even if they are simple...like a walk in the park. I dont think a man should feel bad if he says "so what if I stink with women" or "those guy out there are approaching in clubs and seeing sights and getting tail".. it really doesnt stop me from being happy and enjoying listing to my brother tell me about school or the walk in the park. Yes I might be lonely... but you only get one life...So i choose to live it in happiness rather than sadness. Sadness is stupid...no matter what your circumstances. I rembember tupac said in one of his songs "Even with all this bullsh*t, you still gotta smile and laugh through it" (this is for all the loner guys out there..)
But yet there is some some small part inside me that wants to become a ladies man, and learn the game...but what I really seek from my love life is to have a great and meaningful LTR..and she doesnt have to be a HB 9-10. I am more modest while some may say that I fail to be a DJ, my idea of what a DJ is diffrent from what others may have in their heads. I hate when a person doesnt do anything according to the rules..how he gets flamed for not being a DJ but anyway. Everyone wants to be a Dj so badly, I did, I became obssesed for the last 6 months and I really didnt get anywhere other than a lousy 4 month LTR and no ONS or anything else. I realized that my dream isnt to become a PUA artist or a lay master 5000, I dont want to perfect routines and lines and w/e advacned technique I have. I just hope that I dont have to learn them anyway to find love...in that case all the men not on sosuave are screwed. I dont want to have meaningless flings and sex....but I would only find satisfaction knowing that i could find another women to be in an LTR when I wanted to.
Like I said all i want is a meaningful LTR, I think that a LTR would satisfy me more, because I am the person who cares for love and affection than having as many notches on my belt as I can. I think I would find more satisfaction in having a family with a worthy women and raising up strong independent children and not chase tail or look for getting laid every-week (Right I am so far from that point..but we must know what we are aiming for..well I think). The reason why I stay at sosuave.com is that so I can learn, what I need to know so that in case a LTR doesnt work out, that I can always have the skill to find anohter women who is right for me and build a loving caring relationship all over again. (Anti-Dumps post have been geared toward that direction and I find them really helpful).
I just wish attracting females...meeting them...finding the courage to approach them when all your fears and in my case some social anxiety is screaming no...didnt have to really test a mans metal or rather push him to his limits..finding a life partner or short term lover shouldnt be as hard as getting admitted to law school or becoming a honerable soilder. What Im trying to say is that there are so many men who are so unprepared to deal with females...thats why we have so many AFC's like me...i hope Im a RAFC but who knows. I feel its easier for a man to compete in the olympics or get into law school or charge a hill full of al-queda than to have to deal with everything a man must do to become self-sufficent for himself to meet and find women that he desires rather than sheer dumb luck that most of us meet women with...well im not talking about players and pimps and DJ's like mystery. Men shouldnt have to worry about women to where they revolve so much of their life around improving and refining their approach that they waste so much time that could be used to do other more usefull things..build bridges..buildings..careers..you get my point
We shouldnt have to read self help manuals and go to seminars and spend hours posting and learning things and for those who find the courage to actually apporach (not me) ... they shouldnt have to put up with flaky behavior and play phones games and play hard to get routines. Honestly who feels like a aplha male here? (not me)
But I'll sure as hell become one for women...but see its for women...Everybody does everything for women these days, money, career, attitude, Back when men didnt have such a hard time with women...who cared about being alpha or not...they did what they had to do or what they wanted to in life...they never built there lives around women since it wasnt so difficult to find a life partner or lover. Women did there "job" which was to play the sterotypical role of housewife and men did their "job" of winning the bread for the household and being the protector of the house. After this so called feminist age..roles have been reversed..women dont need men..men dont need women. There is less codependecy of each of the genders. Naturally the only reason you will make an effort to deal with the other gender is for tail or for some comfort and when things get too hard...its easy to jump ship and divorce. This gives women more power and makes women a conscience and grueling effort to work at..who the hell in the 1920's learned to get women..no one.
And now In our day and age...we are safe from danger..harm and risk..man can live a comfortable stable peaceful non confrontational life. This is why I hate the idea of alpha males..because it sounds so stupid and so fake...whenever I hear "be a man". Do you even know what a man is? (Sh*t I dont... but dont tell me you do!) I see posts here trying to define manhood and try to give it essence and shape...people posting things like...men=never scared...men=always tough...NOW where did these guys get these ideas from about alpha males and men and why do we need posts like this and why must we use the stigma of not being called a "man" inspire us to a certain action. Hey xxxposter dont be afc be a "man" is so common... WHY?
The definition of being a man and I dont mean the attitudes... I mean males... the roles that males used to play in past centuries and societies is now called "man" as it also was back then....has become lost and confused. But how many people really have somebody to show them what is "man" This generation of hippies and the baby boomer generation men..the males of those generations have done the boys and men of our age disservice...they did not pass the legacy of being "men" on to us We wouldnt talk about being men if we where so insecure about it ourselves...males are insecure about their masculinty because its meaning and definition has been lost..and we are trying to find it everyday. Who knows what being a real man..we might have some icons that make us believe so..like James Bond...or General Paton but in our lives we are very rarely touched by true masculinity...except by the chemicals called testosterone..men can behave like women..the only diffrence between us is this chemical the rest is up to us to define.
Do you guys realize how much time we spend learning techniques and attiudes just to get women to like us?
What society has done to males is really not fair...I remember that tyler durden even once said in the movie fight club "Men dont fight any wars like those of our forefathers but there is a new war on our masculinity" he said something like that Im not sure.
