Interracial Dating

[regulus]

Lately I've been dating outside of my race. I'm a black male and in college. The black females outnumber us but the pickings are slim and I'll tell you why. All this pro-thug bling bling crap has ruined my youth. A black woman won't talk to you unless you're fresh out of jail driving a an escalade on stolen 24in rims. YOu're not a real black man otherwise. If you're in college you're worth less until you get your degree. The only reason your stock rises is because they need someone to help raise their kids that they had during the perios that they were too good for you. The average black woman has two kids by the age of 25! The only way around this probnlem is to be light skinned, be an athlete, or look like a model. They've got no time for average or above average joes.

They swear up and down that black men date whites because of some european standard of beauty. The truth is that they chase us away and leave us with no other option unless you want to get bent over. They swear that it has nothing to do with their behavior or their rapidly expanding waist lines. Sometimes you'll see a girl her first semester and think she's cute until you see her second semester. It's not uncommon for them to gain 20lbs in a few months. I'm getting so sick of the attitudes all of the time. IT'S NOT A STEREOTYPE!!! These women think thay can say and do anything.

I find black women more attractive but it's just not working out. I used to say I would never turn my back on black women, but times have changed. They're all hypocrits. They chastise you for your wite woman but everytime you turn around they're chasing some light skinned brother with blue eyes and curly hair. Black men don't want white women, we want any woman that will care about us. They try to say that white chicks are easy but the truth is that we just interact with more white women and have better odds. They may outnumber us 4:1 but white chicks outnumber us atleast 30:1.

In 5 yrs I've only been given a remote possibility of a chance with one girl. I got LJBFed but she's made it clear that we have potential. She's not dating anyone (she's an overachiever focused on school). I'm envied by some guys on campus because she hasn't given anyone else the time of day. Truthfully, the only reason I have a chance with her is because her mother is white and taught her to value relationships, not money.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Weazzz da white women-Richie Pryor.

Yo I have mostly dated 99% white women of the last 1** women that I've dated in the last 8 years. I have found that if you go to clubs where there is mostly sista's then your gonna get just that wanting to hook up with you.

If you go to where there are a mix of peoples then you can pull mostly white women, who wanna try the black experience and come on over too the dark side.

but as one girls recently told me "but I,m scared" and as I whispered in her ear "be afraid, be very afraid", "all those rumours you heard about us brotha's is true", "and once you go back it's not cause they won't let you back', but you won't wanna go back"....LOL...

Oh you might wanna go on home (to the sista's ) every now and then...it feels right to be with someone with your skin color and looks more like you.

I don't hate my race. I love being black ...I love the bodies on sistas... I am in the fitness industry so as you know mostly what's there are whites. Sistas don't like to train as much I guess.

My best friend who's white loves sistas...he claims that the sex is better...now he's hooked and doesn't wanna go back..lol.

 

[JohnElDonJuan]

To Regulus

I feel what you have said Regulus about black women.

"A black woman won't talk to you unless you're fresh out of jail driving a an escalade on stolen 24in rims. You're not a real black man otherwise."

I notice that in school and I find the DJ principles fine and everything but for black women the game seems to be alittle different. Thats another reason that I rarely post here because I can't relate my problems to others as well.

My biggest problem when I talk to black girls(ages 15-24) is I don't talk or act black(I dress it tho., clothes is the only thing I can change) and they usually seem interested in me before I open my mouth(prob. due to the clothes).

Theres many ways you can look at it

1) we're using our blackness as an excuse to not getting black women.
2) It's true and get over it.
3) we haven't met the right black women.
4) we're thinking about this alittle too hard.
5) or there is a mixture of them all

 

[htemorp]

Originally posted by LordBrian
Im Latino, and I like women of all races, though I perfer girls whom are either white, or also latino. Asian, and Black girls sortof turn me off.

So you DON'T like women of all races. It's rather humourous to see how you think you do, but you don't. That itself is racism in sub-conscious.

 

[htemorp]

Originally posted by drixsa
i actually just read a study for psych that found that say if a white kid grows up arond only white people and espically other white kids he will have a hard time distinguishing differences between different races, feeling that they all look similar to one another

Those studies are next to bullshiet. Too many unknown factors and it's not under control environment. Studies base on social behaviors are mostly bullshiet, unless you ask very specific questions and the control environment is under monitoring.

 

[regulus]

Re: To Regulus

Originally posted by JohnElDonJuan
I feel what you have said Regulus about black women.

"A black woman won't talk to you unless you're fresh out of jail driving a an escalade on stolen 24in rims. You're not a real black man otherwise."

I notice that in school and I find the DJ principles fine and everything but for black women the game seems to be alittle different. Thats another reason that I rarely post here because I can't relate my problems to others as well.

My biggest problem when I talk to black girls(ages 15-24) is I don't talk or act black(I dress it tho., clothes is the only thing I can change) and they usually seem interested in me before I open my mouth(prob. due to the clothes).

Theres many ways you can look at it

1) we're using our blackness as an excuse to not getting black women.
2) It's true and get over it.
3) we haven't met the right black women.
4) we're thinking about this alittle too hard.
5) or there is a mixture of them all

It's nice to have someone on the board who knows what I'm talking about. Most of this stuff is totally useless for use black guys because of the cultural differences. Try kino on a black chick you just met at the club The funny thing is that even thought these women claim to want a strong man, they merely want a man who appears strong. More times than not, their boyfriends are jsut leaches who bow down to everything with a skirt. Black women are use to being the dominant one and when you refuse to let them rule your life, they say you're too controlling !

 

[Eternal]

I'm white (ghostly white too...) and dated a black girl. We liked each other and things worked out for about three months. But yeah, I do see where you say that most black girls are hyporcites. Three of my best friends are black and don't like black girls that much. You'll find the right girl at some point, whether she be black, white, hispanic, etc.

 

[JoE BoXeR]

I think it's got a lot to do with how common you are. Girls never like to be average and they don't like their boyfriends to be either. They want to stand out and they want the other girls to take notice.

Take for example my high school in Canada: It's totally not a racist town where I live but I'd be surpised if there are more than 10 black people who live here. This past year a black kid moved to our town from the city and immediately everyone was in shock and he was the latest gossip. He wore baby blue sweat suits, headbands to school, carried a basketball with him, gold chain, the whole f*ckin sterotype. Immediately like half the girls in my grade were attracted to him. Not because he was the best looking or the most popular but because he was unique ...something different, crazy and unusual. They all wanted to be the girl who the black guy was going for. Sure there were planty of popular white kids around but they had had the option of going for them for the past 3 years. This went on for about a month or so until he began to settle in and act more like everyone else and he became just another jock (other things lead to his demise like his lack of personality and the fact he never wore deoderant but that's beside the point). People just got used to him and he was no longer rare. I didn't even see the kid for the last few months of school.

Now I could be wrong but I can see the same thing happening to a certain degree if a good looking kid from Australia showed up to North Compton high. People would be attracted to the fact he's different.

I find a lot of you saying that you're having trouble getting with a certain race and this might be because you don't stand out to them. No I'm not saying do what the kid from my highschool did and go out and totally stand out, but make sure they know you're different and worth getting to know.

White Guys wanting to date out of their race.... Black guys wanting to date out of their race......Asian guys wanting to date outside of their race. Bit of a trend going on? Ofcourse though we're always looking for something new and exciting. Maybe you're surrounded by asian girls your whole life and suddenly you see the hottest black chick walk by. Even if the asian girls you're with are gorgeous, there's gonna be some part of you that wants to go for a little taste of the unknown.

I know I'll make it a goal of mine someday to date a woman from every race. I have blue eyes and blonde hair and absolutely adore women with accents. This is excellent because a lot of these accented women are latino and I hear latino women have a thing for guys wiht blonde hair/ blue eyes, which I have (again something that is rare to those girls, but I think I'm beating a dead dog so to speak , you've all got my point.)

BTW the new trend in my school is for girls to like the few East Indian guys

 

[Bubzeebub]

I agree with that bling bling crap. No educated guy is going to want a chick that's ghetto...no matter what background you are. Those girls that are all into that bling bling crap are ghetto and a waste of time.

I know exactly where this guy was coming from. I'm not ghetto ..and very rarely would I wear things that would be considered hip hop clothes. Doesn't mean I don't dress with style....just not the hip hop gear. Anyways, I've pulled black girls in the past who were cute.....got their numbers passin' in the street..or at the mall..etc. ...and everything's cool until we start talkin'. As soon they hear me NOT using any slang ebonics they get bored.

I feel your pain man

The trick is to try to find those classy ladies. They'll appreciate you. They're out there...just not as many of them.

-Bub

 

[BGMan]

That's weird, about the problems that black men have with black women not wanting a brotha who isn't some "thug" loser.

I'm white, and my experience is that women of any and all other races -- black, Latino, oriental, East Indian -- flip for me whereas the white chix generally don't give a hoot. Black girls, for example, are easy, even though I don't fit the "gangsta" stereotype one bit.

Kinda weird, really, since I prefer my own race.

BGMan

 

[Da-OnlyX]

I ain't alone...

Originally posted by regulus
It's nice to have someone on the board who knows what I'm talking about. Most of this stuff is totally useless for use black guys because of the cultural differences. Try kino on a black chick you just met at the club

Amen brotha...

Using kino on a black chick at the club will get you a ***** slap in the cheek....in less than 2 secs.


About the interracial thing....

Personally, i really don't give a **** about that. If I the girl is fine, its all good. Whether she's latino, black, asian...wateva(although i slightly prefare latinos though...)

 

[BobbDobbs]

I haven't a clue how women think (that's what I am here to find out) but I can speak to my own preferences.

I'm white, and I guess my top preference is white females. Secondly would be some Orientals (not all), then some Hispanic (JLo is good, but not the most beautiful face example), and finally a few Blacks.

Black women can be cute in many cases, but for some reason they just don't sexually excite me. I really don't know why.

I don't mind a little heft on a woman if she has it nicely distributed. I do prefer medium to large sized breasts on all females. Smaller breasted thin women can look good, sleek, sexy in their own way -- but I think eventually I'd want to grab onto something a little more substantial.

As for personalities and character, I guess that is important in LTR. I'd prefer upper or middle class behavior (not wealth.) Low class (proud ignorance) is a turn off for LTR.

 

[RDtoo]

Have to agree with BG man. I am white, but never had much success with white women. I found it much easier to get dates with women who were black, asian, etc. The only problems I can see is that if you are looking for a LTR, you are likely to be more compatible with someone of your own ethnic background than someone who is not. Sometimes the differences that attracted us at first, can be the differences that alienate us later on. That being said, I am alot older than most of you on this forum and if you can find someone who loves you no matter who they are, you are a lucky man.

 

[Squy]

Originally posted by Bubzeebub
As soon they hear me NOT using any slang ebonics they get bored.

Ebonic talking. I have a sound clip here, is this really how genuine ghetto black males talk? Or maybe it's just the stereotype or whatever?

Get the mp3 sound clip here

 

[regulus]

we're talking about race issues in a class of mine tommorow. i'll post any interesting comments about interracial dating tommorow

 

[icehot]

regulus and all,

This is a pretty good discussion. 'Cause i'm sharing your pain as well brothers.

Here's my problem. I have a serious mental block about going out with a woman who has kids. There's just no way i'm taking care of another loser guy's kid. Now, combine this with the fact that every sista my age that i've meet has children and i'm pretty much screwed with any hopes of getting into a LTR with a sista.

As with you guys i'm not into the whole bling,bling, thugged out scene.
I'm more into the kenneth cole than the sean johns. and the 350zx than a pimped out escalade with the shiny rims....I think you get my drift. I actually had one honey at a club accuse me of speaking too proper. wtf??

Its kinda funny how everybody is observing/experiencing the same thing even though i'll bet we are all from different geographic areas.

Its also funny how white brothers are experiencing the same thing as well. My best friend is a white dude and for the longest time, white girls would not give him the time of day where as every other girls would.
Asian honeys loved him and black girls were always throwing themselves at him. I could never figure it out.
When we are at clubs, we still joke about the fact that there's no danger in us going after the same girl...

Its definately a needle in a haystack situation and as someone else said, if you're lucky enough to find someone to love you, then who cares what race they are? right?

 

[Bubzeebub]

The reason why most of the honeys in the clubs/bars (the "damn...check THIS girl out" types)...is because most of those girls they're not on the same level as you. I've had the same thing happen to me a few times. Those chickenheads they don't care about the finer things in life. If you're trying to talk to a girl that ONLY knows baggy pants, long gold cross chains and boots then you're not going to have any appeal to her. I know quite a few women who are like that.....FINE.....they could pull almost any guy they wanted...but they end up with knuckleheads because that's all they know.

As far as the women with kids thing...someone should start a post to find out how many guys look the other way when they see a woman with kids. Personally, I don't give women with kids the time of day. I'd rather have a woman without kids because I've found that most of the women with kids are ones that were just too good for anyone before and were like the type of girl I just described above. Now that she's got a kid and finding things are hard she then looks for a guy who can help her. I see this kind of thing ALL the time...you know..the gum-chewing secretary who has a kid or two and finding out it tough to make ends meet. Guys...don't be suckered into falling for these kind of women!

Also, as far as the interracial thing (and you can take notes on this Regulus)....I think if someone is against or not at all interested in dating someone outside their race it's because of RACISM! There's no other way to put it. Subtle racism.

That's my 2 cents.

-Bub

"Never judge a woman by looks alone"

 

[JohnElDonJuan]

I have noticed the same thing I have always been able to attract white girls but blacks are a different story. The black girls I do attract which is a varying amount I learn they like me after school is over when I won't be seeing them for a while. Theres some that is just not my type I probably attract them because I act like a perfect dj to the ug's and a lousy one to the hb's. The most damaging factor to my game is my ****ed up rep in HS. I forgot the person who said this but whoever said it it's very true, He said "Your Reputation is like credit the moment you **** it up it's you ruined it"

Now for the white guys that attract the black women I don't know what it is. I did seem to notice it tho my white friend I'll call him SQ has no problem attracting black girls it's probably his sense of humor though.

 

[BobbDobbs]

Originally posted by Bubzeebub
I think if someone is against or not at all interested in dating someone outside their race it's because of RACISM! There's no other way to put it. Subtle racism.

But that is true by definition. That's like saying someone who is not interested in dating fat chicks is expressing fatism. True, but so? We like what we like.

 

[krd]

First of all, I'd say making such comments about all black women being hipocrites is an over-generalization. I'm not here to belly-ache about people being racist or any of that issue crap. But anytime you make such general comments before getting to know a person, you are severely limiting yourself. It's one thing if you don't find a certain type of woman attractive. It's another if you automatically assume they are going to be unpleasant people based on women you've previously come into contact with. Everyone needs to be given a fair chance. Imagine how we'd feel if women did that to us (they probably do).

In my adolescence/early teens, I was very attracted to black women. Now my tastes have changed, and I'd say caucasian is slightly higher on my list. But heck, I like any kind of woman as long as they are attractive. Either they're hot or they're not. Of course I am talking about physical attractiveness. With personality, I go on a case by case basis.