Interracial Dating

[Bubzeebub]

I prefer women outside of my race. I'm still open and believe there is beauty in all races. However, more times than not only the women of my own race are interested and make themselves available. Actually MANY more times than not.

Any advice?

 

[drixsa]

what race are you?

 

[Bubzeebub]

Black..and prefer non-black females...but it's usually only the black females that want to get all buddy buddy.

Are there other guys out there that prefer dating outside of their race and find that they have to put in more work to make it happen?

 

[drixsa]

i luv the black chicks

maybe its b/c im not black but i find that most people like to date within their race b/c they feel more comfortable and feel that they have more in common

though i realize it is a stereotype i much prefer a tight firm ass than some big fat ass, whats the deal with that, i have a good friend thats black and he can never give me a solid reason

 

[Starwind]

Mexican talking

Most people, I think, will want to date within their race; it's just how attraction works.

But what I notice is that I have a really easy time attracting Latin, Indian and Asian girls, and I can't get attention from white or black girls. Dunno why, but it just seems to work that way.

 

[Bubzeebub]

I don't know if "that's just how attraction works" ...I think it's just the market. If you're like me, and think there's beautiful white, black, Asian and Latina women, but you basically get play from mostly black females...who do you think you're gonna end up with?

 

[Starwind]

Well, the reason I say "that's just how attraction works" is because society defines beauty based on a standard, and every society is different. For instance, look back to ancient Greeks, Egyptians, etc.; studying their art, each had a different idealization of a human being. That idealization changed throughout time (at some point, large, "fuller" women were the ideal; before that, pregnant women were considered most beautiful), and so here we are, today, the year 2003.

Taking this example, I'd be willing to bet that the average black man will have different opinions about white women than the average white man; put simply, I think that black guys will find black girls most attractive, white guys think white girls are the best-looking, etc. If nothing else, you know that white guys don't usually like big booty, but black guys do, right? At least, where I live a white girl with a big ass is pretty much left untouched by everyone but black guys and hispanics.... Anyway, what do black women have more of than anything else? Large, plentiful asses.

Though the "melting pot" aspect of the U.S. does play a role (I am assuming you live in the States), it's still fairly segmented. There is some interracial dating, but it is not nearly as prevelant as the existence of a tendency to date within one's race. Therefore, I would immediately conclude that it's simply natural that you attract women of your own ethnic background than any other. I do--I always attract hispanic girls, but never a white girl. For whatever reason, I also attract Asian girls--can't explain that one, really; but I do attract fewer Asian girls than I do latinas.

It may also have to do with social stereotypes. Theorizing, I don't attract white girls because they probably see me as someone who'll end up gardening, cooking, etc.; that's stereotypical, but that's what they're used to seeing, day in and day out--Mexicans working with plants and at McDonald's. I've heard many black guys complain that white girls seem scared of them, thinking they'll be mugged or raped or whatever; nothing could be further from the truth, but unfortunately this is what they think about when they see a black guy. Again, I know I'm not going to be a gardener and I know you're not a rapist, but it's this mentality that probably keeps them away from you and I. That's not to say you absolutely *can't* attract a white girl (of course I've seen interracial couples and I know a few), but don't be surprised that you're having a harder time at it.

Well, that's my two cents.

 

[Ded_Skin_Mask13]

none...i decided to stay unmarried for the rest of my life.

No kids to feed, No women to compromise yourself with, Its just you, your money, your FAMILY(not after marriage), and a couple of ladies here and there............

OF course this might be and probably is ignorant....but for now I don't care. And plus, it seems like people don't take marriage very seriously these days, its all about financial stabilty and marriage for me is sacred, so therefore I rather spend my time with genuinity, than wasting time filing divorce papers because my wife doesn't think I make a high enough salary, or some other unnecessary B.S.

 

[Starwind]

Originally posted by Ded_Skin_Mask13
none...i decided to stay unmarried for the rest of my life.

No kids to feed, No women to compromise yourself with, Its just you, your money, your FAMILY(not after marriage), and a couple of ladies here and there............

OF course this might be and probably is ignorant....but for now I don't care. And plus, it seems like people don't take marriage very seriously these days, its all about financial stabilty and marriage for me is sacred, so therefore I rather spend my time with genuinity, than wasting time filing divorce papers because my wife doesn't think I make a high enough salary, or some other unnecessary B.S.

??? Weren't we talking about interracial dating?

 

[Ded_Skin_Mask13]

Yes! But one of the posts said...Who do you think you'll end up with(race-wise)? And i thought it was a worthy enough question to be answered..

 

[htemorp]

Depends on where you at. I must say that certain regions of this country is still socially unacceptable for interracial dating, especially if it's Black/White.

 

[Bubzeebub]

STARWIND...your post was so funny I had to laugh.

"It may also have to do with social stereotypes. Theorizing, I don't attract white girls because they probably see me as someone who'll end up gardening, cooking, etc.; that's stereotypical, but that's what they're used to seeing, day in and day out--Mexicans working with plants and at McDonald's."


that's funny....workin' with plants. If they assume that's what you're about before getting to you....they probably live in a small world.

"If nothing else, you know that white guys don't usually like big booty, but black guys do, right? At least, where I live a white girl with a big ass is pretty much left untouched by everyone but black guys and hispanics"

I don't know if that's necessarily true either. I think that's just by default. For a variety of reasons, some environmental and maybe some genetic, black/hispanic females may have big booties. So then the guys who are with them will just assume...or just get used to lovin' a big ol' booty. Look at Ben Affleck.....he saw that junk in the trunk Jennifer Lopez had and he was HYPNOTIZED.

 

[kayman]

Originally posted by Starwind
I've heard many black guys complain that white girls seem scared of them, thinking they'll be mugged or raped or whatever; nothing could be further from the truth, but unfortunately this is what they think about when they see a black guy it.

I just recently transfered to a university in new jersey where about 97% of the girls are white and 50% of them rich. I'm a black man but i'm not attracted to any one race more than another. Because there are mostly white girls available in school that's what I had to go for but they seemed to want nothing to do with a black dude whether it be for social reasons, sterotypes or whatever.

For a while it messed with my self-esteem a little and caused me to have a resentment toward white girls but then i realized that it's not their fault. They've been brainwashed by the media and society to believe that anything other that white is not beautiful.

Let me give you a silly example. GirlsGoneWild, have you ever seen a non white chick on GGW? When was the last time you saw a black,asian or hispanic male depicted as sexy?

If from the day a girl is born, all she sees on TV is the patterns listed above, what's gonna happen? There's no way she can see a non white person as sexy.

Bubzeebub, it sounds to me that you're not in a situation where black girls are not available so you need to take a look at why you're not attracted to them rather than focusing on how to get white chicks because that will cause you more frustration that it's worth believe me. Too many of them will be close minded to you unless you become rich and famous.

 

[jlujan]

Well, to begin with, Mexicans are biracial, a mixture of both white and native american, i can't speak about others, but myself i date a lot more white than Mexican women, god knows why, maybe its because i don't look like the the sterotypical Mexican.

I personally don't find Black or Asian females atractive at all, so saying that i date outside of my race is difficult, since technically i am already part white part native american.

 

[davelmn2003]

I have to say that black males get their fair share of being portrayed as "sexy" in one way or the other--look at the sports, look at the black guys in Calvin Klein, and other clothing commercials. Of course, they take a backseat to white men, but they fair much better in being portrayed as 'sexy' than Asians or Latinos.

I'm not black, so correct me if I'm wrong, but I get the impression that black males like to date girls from other races more so than males from other races. If this observation is correct then the cause (one of them anyway) I think is because light-skinned women are seen as the most beautiful (and white women in particular). Even within the black community, I know for a fact that more black males are attracted to lighter skinned black females. So if black males are unable to attract other races of women (esp. white women) I think it has more to do with white women's rejection of black manhood rather than black males feeling more comfortable with black females.

Just theorizing.

 

[oakraiderz2]

I think its based on where you live. Basically saying that if you grew up around a certain race you are most likely to be attracted to them. Thats just my opinion.

 

[LordBrian]

Im Latino, and I like women of all races, though I perfer girls whom are either white, or also latino. Asian, and Black girls sortof turn me off.

 

[Bubzeebub]

For the record..... I was in a very similar situation as KAYMAN. I went to like an almost all white h.s. and college was the same way too. So, there is some truth to saying that it all depends in who you're around. If you're around a certain group or type of people, of course you're going to be attracted to them just as much, if not more.

As far as white girls being closed minded ...yeah..some are....and some aren't. What I don't like are the BIIIG white chicks, the ones that look like they were pumped up with air, assuming that all brothers are into them.

I want ya'll to try ...for one week....to try to pull only girls that are of a different ethnicity than you....and let us know how it went.

...and oh KAYMAN....I'm keepin' an open mind.

 

[drixsa]

Originally posted by oakraiderz2
I think its based on where you live. Basically saying that if you grew up around a certain race you are most likely to be attracted to them. Thats just my opinion.

i actually just read a study for psych that found that say if a white kid grows up arond only white people and espically other white kids he will have a hard time distinguishing differences between different races, feeling that they all look similar to one another

 

[princelydeeds]

Originally posted by davelmn2003
I'm not black, so correct me if I'm wrong, but I get the impression that black males like to date girls from other races more so than males from other races. If this observation is correct then the cause (one of them anyway) I think is because light-skinned women are seen as the most beautiful (and white women in particular). Even within the black community, I know for a fact that more black males are attracted to lighter skinned black females. So if black males are unable to attract other races of women (esp. white women) I think it has more to do with white women's rejection of black manhood rather than black males feeling more comfortable with black females.

Just theorizing.

Not to get into a whole debate on racism or the legacy of slavery, but this mentality is the residual affect of slavery and institutionalized racism. The white female tends to be portrayed as the standard of beauty the world over. All those things which are white or are associated with whiteness were/are depicted as better or more desirable. The straight hair, thin lips, the lighter colors of hair, the light colors of the eye, the lightness of skin, etc. Those things which are black tend to be portrayed as less desirable. Kinky hair, thick lips, dark skin, dark hair, thickness in the hips etc.

Blacks in america have no identity other than america. If you ask any white person where they are from they will tell you ireland, ENgland, Germany etc. Ask a black person and they say Georgia, Alabama, California, NY etc. Blacks lost their identity when they were brought over here, the whole cultural context was destroyed. The only identity they had to draw upon was that of America. In America lets face it all that is white is considered right. All that is white is promoted as beautiful. So you have a group that were brainwashed into thinking that which made them uniques was inferior. To every other group.

Slave owners conditioned slaves to resent those things that made them black. Lighter people, especially women, were given easier jobs, more education, more freedoms and the sense that they were closer to the masters. The darker skinned blacks were out in the fields working hard. This brought a division among blacks between the lights and darks. This conditioning started a hatred toward those things which are most closely associated to being black, in other words it began a self hatred. The media has continued this up to the present. The standard of beauty is always the white chick. The blond haired blue eyed flat booty chick has always been depicted as pure, innocent, needing to be protected, the essence of womanhood, and feminity.

Think about language for a minute. Black is always bad, white is always good. A dark figure is always the bad guy. The good guy wore the white hat, and rode the white horse. These portrayals over the years have continued this negative self perception. If all that is white is good then the opposite of white is black. SO we can say all that is black is bad.

I am happy that as a more "enlightened" society we are doing MORE, to do away with this thinking. The black empowerment, black is beautiful movement helped to push us away from that sort of thinking. But trust me that the slave mentality is still in full effect.