Interpretation of 'The Sign'

[nimloth32]

well, i just want to ask for help in this..well, i knew a girl from my class..she mix around with a bunch of guys..and of course, i am interested in her..at first, we were ok..i mean we chat with each other every night via msn..and get acquainted with each other well enough like sharing secrets, gossiping, etc..(i am the one who msg her first everytime)..then, after that, somehow, i just dun know how my friends (that bunch of guys that she used to mix around with) know that i am interested in her..so they tease us often..then, i just thought that this may be the time to start really going into next step like flirting with her, texting her (like sending her words of encouragement before exam), etc (and i am well aware that she knows i am interested in her by then)..well, i was confused with this then, because when i talked to her in uni, she seems to lose the enthusiasm of talking to me anymore..but well, we still communicate with each other via handphone since her internet is down(and yea, stupidly, i am still the one calls her)..and by phone, she still talk to me and chat with each other and laugh together like the old times..

so my question is..am i screwed up??? should i continue on or forget about this????

oh yea, fyi, her study results are better than mine....so does this matter? and she is darn popular..like a few handsome guys went after her before but rejected kinda stuff and also i still did not confess to her yet..and i knew her about 4 months if i am not mistaken...

i hope that you guys understand what am i writing..i mean sometimes, it is really hard to intepret the 'sign'..i just don't want to misintepret anything and end up doing something stupid..

(and yea, i understand the part where the guy must not show that he is 'desperate'. Well, at times, i also did not contact her and doing my stuff..but somehow, at the end of days, i will call her and explain to her why i am busy and did not call her...i guess that it is a very stupid move btw..)

 

[I'm Charming]

First bad sign;

i mean we chat with each other every night via msn

You're giving vast amounts of attention to this chick, bad idea, attention is your currency, what is she giving you in return? Nothing? Then are these everyday conversations valid? No.

get acquainted with each other well enough like sharing secrets, gossiping, etc..(i am the one who msg her first everytime)..

You have built so much rapport that you have ended up in the girly-friend-zone, you are her 'friend' an orbiter, you are like a female in her eyes, you have no manly qualities.

then, after that, somehow, i just dun know how my friends (that bunch of guys that she used to mix around with) know that i am interested in her..so they tease us often

This gives the impression that you have low social value, these people are not teasing 'us' - she is not worried about it, your attraction is outside of her, but if people are teasing you and it is effecting you then you obviously lack confidence, these people are not your friends and you should seriously think about getting some new ones.

time to start really going into next step like flirting with her, texting her

You left this stage too late, you should have initiated it much earlier well before you became her friend, this is like - say one of your male friends came onto you, you'd find it creepy and weird, you are a female in her eyes - so your coming onto her strikes her as weird - you are totally without manly qualities in her eyes.

she seems to lose the enthusiasm of talking to me anymore

This is because of what I have said before, she doesnt like it, you've stopped giving her attention currency and have become creepy.

But then you start giving her what she wants again;

she still talk to me and chat with each other and laugh together like the old times..

So its all cool for her.

so my question is..am i screwed up??? should i continue on or forget about this????

Yes - forget about it, to answer your question she has no attraction for you, numerous reasons:- You spent too long building rapport, you have low social value and you are her friend - desexualised.

oh yea, fyi, her study results are better than mine....so does this matter? and she is darn popular.

In your mind whilst writing this you are thinking she is better than you, you are putting her on a pedestal.

i hope that you guys understand what am i writing..i mean sometimes, it is really hard to intepret the 'sign'

I'm sorry mate there is no sign, this chick has no attraction for you, you should step back, give her NO attention and work on improving yourself. Read the Book Of Pook and the DJ Bible as well.

at the end of days, i will call her and explain to her why i am busy and did not call her...i guess that it is a very stupid move btw..)

You are her b*tch at the moment, why should you validate not calling her, you are a busy man, you have things to do in your life, by giving her all this attention and apologising when you are not there to give it you have become seriously low value and easily manipulated.

It's not cool mate, you need to seriously re-evaluate your life, values and prospects. Take a step back, I'll say this again because most newbies dont do it before posting up here, but read the damn DJ Bible and the Book of Pook and have some self respect man!

 

[nimloth32]

whoa, thx for this mate...i guess i build up my 'strategy' on a very wrong premise ..thx a lot...chill..

 

[I'm Charming]

You're welcome dude, if you stick with the DJ Bible you'll get to where you want to be eventually, it shouldnt be a problem.

 

[DonGorgon]

Great work by "I'm Charming"... great work indeed!

Those are mistake we have all made..

 

[nimloth32]

so i take this as i am already out of the game right????

 

[I'm Charming]

You lost this game set and match mate, so take it like a man, improve on your situation and soldier on to the next one!

 

[Al Moh.]

Yupp, you are done for now, you should forget about her and start becoming a DJ. There may be a time when you can try again if you still want her then because your standarts could have improved. It's not impossible to escape the friendszone, I did do it twice already, but it requieres you to forget about her for now and start changing.

 

[Effington]

You are deeply entrenched in the friend zone, man. The only way to get out is to move on to new targets.