Internet Dating 101

[MRomeo99]

Now, don't get me wrong, you can close anything you want in the same day. It happens all the time. However, it really depends on what you're looking for.

Go for the phone dude, don't IM for a date. And don't text message/email for a date. I think the phone works the best. Be assertive, it will usually throw them for a loop. The problem is that conceptually it's too much of a leap from IM's to meeting in real life. But, not nearly as much of a leap from talking on the phone to meeting up. That's why you'll probably have more success if you get them on the phone first.

Now, if you're nervous and don't want to come across that way. I think it's ok to have a phone conversation, and then the next time you see her, IM to ask her to meet you. Of course you might not have time with this one, but such is life.

What I think a key to successful 'relationships'/'friendships' is to transition from a very abstract guy online to a real guy you'd like to hang out with. Now, you can totally seduce a woman heart and soul online before you ever talk on the phone. Have done it, don't recommend it. But, I look at internet "dating" as more like internet introductions. Use it to get an in to talking to the female, and transition from fantasy to reality as quickly as possible.

Hopefully this makes sense, I'm very sleepy.

Romeo

HTH,

Romeo

 

[^_^]

Got her number, called her up. Asked her out (She left a party early to talk to me...so I figured wth, why not ask her tonight).

She politely said no, that she would like to get to get to know me better. But she did say she really enjoys talking to me and would like to continue. She's gone for 3 weeks though. My goal is to peak her interest level, but at the same time not be a emotional tampon.

Thanks for the help bud, i appreciate it. I'm going to make this work, I have her interest, her phone #, everything except the date. Shouldnt be hard to go from there.

 

[MRomeo99]

It seems like you're doing well. However, be careful that you pin all your hopes on this one chick. How many pictures have you seen?

Along with the progression of how you move from one step to another, you have to keep in mind, NEVER become attached until you've met in person. There are an infinite amount of things that can go wrong when you actually meet. She doesn't look as good as her picture, you don't attract her. The conversation can be stilted, etc, etc, etc.

Just be careful setting your goals on this woman, when you have no idea if she really is what you want until you have met IRL at least a few times.

The cool thing is, there are a thousand other women that you can meet right now, today online. So, go "practice" on them if you want while the other girl is out of town. If you get good at this game, you can usually get a pretty good flow going. You can meet anywhere from 2-4 different women a week. Now many of the same women will be on from week to week. But, many new ones will show up as well.

Good luck.

Romeo

 

[Player_Supreme]

Well I just got home from an internet dates home. We met for the first time last night for my usual routine...coffee then to my favorite pub then to my place.

I had a rotation problem (had to call a few other girls) so I couldn't keep her there, so I told her to go home and that I'd come over later.

What sells with these internet women is the old Destiny and fate thing. The soul mate angle. It seems to me that by the time they have reduced themselves to the internet, that they are seriously looking for a soul mate.

And if you use that like the carrot and a stick you can practically lead a woman anywhere.

I'm sure this is your angle Romeo also, but correct me if I'm wrong. Funny thing is, is I did feel sparks fly with this one or that deep attraction.

 

[^_^]

Originally posted by MRomeo99
It seems like you're doing well. However, be careful that you pin all your hopes on this one chick. How many pictures have you seen?

Along with the progression of how you move from one step to another, you have to keep in mind, NEVER become attached until you've met in person. There are an infinite amount of things that can go wrong when you actually meet. She doesn't look as good as her picture, you don't attract her. The conversation can be stilted, etc, etc, etc.

Just be careful setting your goals on this woman, when you have no idea if she really is what you want until you have met IRL at least a few times.

The cool thing is, there are a thousand other women that you can meet right now, today online. So, go "practice" on them if you want while the other girl is out of town. If you get good at this game, you can usually get a pretty good flow going. You can meet anywhere from 2-4 different women a week. Now many of the same women will be on from week to week. But, many new ones will show up as well.

Good luck.

Romeo

I'm not really pinning all my hopes on one chick. I just think it would be cool if it went according to plan. I've seen 4 pics, 2 upper and 2 full body shots. So I 'm not to worried about that ^^

I'm still meeting chicks in real life and all, just for some reason I actually click with this chick better than anyone I've met in a while in real life. Which to me is kind of strange, you think it'd work the other way around. So I'm just going to keep with it and see what, if anything, comes out of it.

A lot of the chicks I've met online, I have had no desire to talk to after 1/2 conversations. Much less meet them in real life. Online is a trickey world I think.

Thanks ^^

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Just bumping the thread in case there are any DJs still working the online set. My ad on Match broke the 600 mark over the holidays. One thing that I've noticed that action picture or pictures out of the norm get much more action than typical head or body shots.

 

[ER!C L!VE]

I just joined Yahoo! Personals. I am looking for girls ages 18-22. My profile just me playing around saying I'm looking for a fun girl. There really isn't anything serious about it.

I'll let ya know how it goes.

Eric
www.tenderz.net/forum <<-where you can find me

 

[Devestator]

I tried the ad. Huge jump in my hit-count, winks, and e-mail. Thanks, playa. How long can I keep the facade up? Long enough...

 

[sustainable007]

You guys should watch Napoleon Dynamite.....

 

[Devestator]

I did. And...

 

[ER!C L!VE]

Napoleon Dynamite has a geeky, effeminate character who chats to his online girlfriend for hours every day. He say's "it's getting pretty serious, we've been chatting every day now for like over 2 months". It's really funny how he says it too. Now, not everyone is going to like the humor, but I loved it.

Anyway, Player_Supreme started this thread and requested that I inform anyone who is reading this that he has changed forums and is now posting on www.tenderz.net/forum regarding internet dating, women, life etc...

Cheers!

Eric
www.tenderz.net/forum

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Anyone else still sarging online? I've had some pretty interesting dates recently, more older women than usual. Well, over the holidays my profile had 600+ hits and as of this month it's broke 1000. Maybe they have a resolution find someone new or maybe they just want to be with someone on Valentines Day.

Any other theories?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Sorry, I keep my profile unique by not giving it out. I don't think it would work for anyone else anyway, I'm quite non-typical.

But I saw your post in another thread but didn't have a chance to comment on it. The first thing I saw was that you were holding an assault rifle. That doesn't go over too well with women who usually primarily check out your picture before reading your profile.

However, since you are military, why not be patriotic and post a picture in your full uniform, y'know do the whole Officer and a Gentleman theme going on. Typically that's the way to go with women, the whole uniform thing gets them going. I'm not military but I do have a pic up with me in my cycling gear that gets a bunch of good feedback (thank you Lance Armstrong).

Another thing was with the profile itself. You aren't selling yourself too well. If you play up the military thing you've got to make sure that women don't assume you're a jar head. Play toward their romantic side. Describe what you enjoy doing and how they could fit in with the adventure. Paint a vivid picture so it would seem as if they already know you.

One other thing, get some action shots of you. It can be you and your buds at a party, you standing near a piece of military gear or better yet, you running an obstacle course or some other training. Just remember, full and half body shots usually do better than plain head shots.

Remember, play into their romantic fantasies of being with a romantic hero. Someone they would be proud of and brag about to their girlfriends.

 

[insomniac]

I just got back into the internet dating a week ago. Not having any trouble with them initiating with me, as about 40 have contacted me in the last week, due mostly to a really good, picture I have up (a lot of women think it's a fake...maybe I should put some more up). The mix is typically attractive to hot women who will either not write back after I reply to them or seem a little shallow (they only write because they like my picture), average looking but I have a lot in common with, and the occassional fat girls. About one out of five or so would be ones I'd even consider replying to (right age, education, interests, etc.)

What I'd really like to improve is succeeding with the ones *I* pick out. Usually I'll write three sentences max, and mention something I thought we had in common or some place we've both gone. About one out of four will write back...and two out of those three will eventually stop responding after a couple exchanges. I've improved a lot, in that I've learned how to build rapport quickly through a couple messages. But, still, what have you found works best when writing to them the first time? I've done C&F, but that seems to work only after you have rapport or have met inperson. I should mention I've only gone after and replied to ones I thought were LTR material (24-30 yo, never married, college educated, have some career, similar interests, and are maybe an 8 on looks scale).

Something else I've thought about...I've never used the internet to just hook-up for a ONS. Not sure I even want to...but still I'm curious how it's done. I'm certain I've gone out with girls who were in that frame of my mind (wanted to meet within a few days of contacting them, brought up sexual topics) but since I wasn't looking for or expecting that, I did nothing about it. Just interested in what your experiences have been.

 

[Devestator]

If I was a chick, I'd LOVE the whole assualt rifle thing. Kick a$$! But I'm not, for Frank Casinova's probably right.

PS's ad is working on me. I'm getting dates from it. You don't need to be a black body builder for it work.

Why was he banned?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by insomniac
...Something else I've thought about...I've never used the internet to just hook-up for a ONS. Not sure I even want to...but still I'm curious how it's done. I'm certain I've gone out with girls who were in that frame of my mind (wanted to meet within a few days of contacting them, brought up sexual topics) but since I wasn't looking for or expecting that, I did nothing about it. Just interested in what your experiences have been.

Back when I first started getting good with online sarging I did a bunch of ONS. It was fun at first but it got boring pretty quickly once I realized that it was easier to have ONS by just meeting someone at a club.

I soon realized that since I wanted a LTR I used dating sites to be able to find women which fit my LTR criteria. I have yet to find exactly what I'm looking for, however I've met a bunch of quality women that I go with from time to time just because we're friends (some with benefits ). But undeniably, it's easy to be more selective when sarging online.

As for you succeeding with the women you select, all I can say is that you need to set yourself apart from your competition. I am guessing that over 90% of guys responding to ads say generally the same thing; the common interests between them.

Understand that for every response a guy gets, a woman gets about 20 or 30 if she has a picture online. Even more if she's attractive. More still if she is single without children. Now consider that the majority of her responses say the same thing; that they have stuff in common. YAWWWWNNNNNN.........

So instead of just pointing out the obvious, market your value. Point out what's unique about you that will not only make her want to exchange emails, it actually makes her want to meet you. Short emails are fine but be sure to give her enough to make her want to know more, not just shrug off your note because it didn't say much about you.

 

[insomniac]

A little on my internet dating progress:

Met three women in the last two weeks. Didn't go poorly, great personalities, but I just wasn't as attracted to them in person.

Tonight, met the forth. Going into it, I knew she was pretty hot, 26yo, a 10 body, maybe 7 or 8 face. A little naive, but genuine personality. I'd been expecting to meet an AW, but she turned out fairly sweet and a little shy, and better looking in person. So, I meet up with her...and she is nervous acting and apologetic for her behavior...she says she hasn't met anyone for awhile, and of the 50 or so guys that have written to her I'm the only one she's replied to (actually, she wrote to me first). So, from the start, I seemed to have the advantage, as she seemed more nervous while I kept cool. So, we sat and ate dinner (didn't say I'd take her out to eat, just that we'd meet somewhere...but we were both hungry). Things I noticed: we were in brightly lit section of the restaurant, and her pupils were dialated, and she kept playing around with things on the table...wrapping the napkin around the bottom of her glass, or playing with the straw. She had a lace up shirt unsuccessfully covering her cleavage...which I have to give myself credit for not staring at. Anyway, mostly fluff talk the entire time. My attempt at kino, touching her hand while asking about the four rings she was wearing, was interupted by the waitress stopping by to ask if we needed anything else. I brought up Valentine's day, and what she considered romantic....other topics like that. It was starting to drag on, so I ended it. It seemed like a mediocre departure...I didn't try to kiss her, but gave her a hug like I do in most of these situations where we haven't really progressed far enough for a kiss. Could have been a better situation...I find sitting across the table from someone too confining. What I'm getting from it all, is she's shy meeting new people, topics like relationships and romance scare her (she'd change subjects after talking about it awhile), she's used to guys just trying to get in her pants and seemed impressed that I actually asked about other things in her life. I don't know...didn't go poorly, but just seemed to have a weak ending. Feels like maybe we met for too long (2 hours).. At this point, I'm content to just wait and see if she contacts me again. I haven't felt like putting much effort into any one girl lately.

 

[Bonhomme]

Each to his own

No offense, PS, but I couldn't post a profile like that without risking deafness from my bullsh1t detectors going off.

But if it works for you, great. Each to their own.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Anyone have any updates?

 

[al77]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Anyone have any updates?

Online reminds me blind dates.. no matter how good a convo you can get in email...when you meet her, she doesn't speak like she writes ... I dont speak like I write.. she looks not exactly as she looks in her pics...

Amazingly, still lots of women want to establish some rapport in email... like if it helps a lot.
Most inetersting and good online dates were with sombody who I never thought was interesting\attractive\interested.
It is almosta rule.
..Weird?