internet dating 101 = zero results. Why? (PICS)

[Bonhomme]

If it's any consolation...

... I could not have a go at Player Supreme's "Internet Dating 101" approach without risking deafness from my bullsh1t detectors going off.

That's his approach: you figure out yours.

**********

Good post, Donald Kaufman.

 

[Golden Arms]

Originally posted by ogre
who was that? is that the "frank" you were talking about? are his posts still online?

if you got lots of time on your hands.. feel free to scan through those gems

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=35179

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=41222

 

[ogre]

I think Ogre could benefit from a couple of Anthony Robbins audio books.

... I could not have a go at Player Supreme's "Internet Dating 101" approach without risking deafness from my bullsh1t detectors going off.

I agree. But I gave it a try.

it was clear he was trying out different personalities. Not Pscho, just trying different angles.

The moral is fuzzy. The reason I think it is appropriate here is because it was the struggle that changed him.

great post, Donald. thanks. I am experienting like your friend and I am definitely going thru some shyt.

I think Ogre could benefit from a couple of Anthony Robbins audio books.

Fawk that! Next person who tells me to think positive I'm gonna belt him in the mouth!

 

[smooth_as_silk]

ogre my buddy, I have never seen such boring and ineffective replies in my life ...
Do not overdo it and please keep it simple.

 

[Jon E]

Originally posted by Donald Kaufman
The moral is fuzzy. The reason I think it is appropriate here is because it was the struggle that changed him. Wanting the world to be fair led him down a dark tunnel. Realizing he had to take responsibility made him what he had always wanted to be.

Good post Don,

That's a good example of the "wanting it tax". The more you want something, the higher the price. The less you want it, the lower the price.

Ogre,

Think about what those long, well thought out replies to those women ad's said about you as a person? About what you thought about them? About how much emphasis you placed on them?............About how much emphasis you place on yourself?

 

[ShortTimer]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Personally, I would suggest taking the personality profile on TRUE.COM which will get you on tract for learning these things.

I enjoy taking personality tests so I went over to that site for the fun of it. You can take the test for free so that's what I did. Now, I keep getting mail from "member" who "like my profile."

Ok there is one huge problem: I never set up a profile, I just took the test. There are actually two questionairs they give and I filled out the first one with all "no comments" and then I got to the personality test.

It's so funny to me as this is an obvious marketing scheme to prey on the weak minded. Sure, maybe they do offer a legit service; but they need to not be sending me lies in my email. LOL

 

[ShortTimer]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
(others may recognize the 'Frank' reference... you may fall to the ranks of another well known member of this site that eventually gave up and his life actually seemed to spiral even more out of control.

Oh I remember who you are talking about now. I just didn't realize his life went to ****. Wow that's too bad.

 

[DJDamage]

Regarding the online dating, I think you are corresponding with women who have many issues and hangups about men and if you don't fit the mold of your 'every day normal guy' your chances decreases even farther.

When you look at their profile which includes a picture and a brief summary, you need to pay close attension to red flags. Lets take a look at ana the woman you choose to correspond with: http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/ana.htm

Do you see a happy person in that picture? I sure don't, she looks way too serious and authoratative, why isn't she smiling? why isn't she happy? those questions you need to ask yourself: If she doesn't look happy by herself why would she be happy with me? Basically what I am saying that happy and positive people maintain happy and positive relationships.

Lets look at what she writes:

I am young, intelligent, attractive woman. Somewhere along the way my life has lost its spice. Despite being surrounded by many great men, i feel lack of romance, complete abscence of that wonderful butterflies-in-your-stomach sensation, when you look at that special someone, feel his touch on your skin, his passionate kisses, that seem to make the Earth spin faster. Majority of you will most likely rush to offer great sex, endless orgasms, etc. NO ! No, gentlemen, that is NOT what i mean. In my opinion, sex is merely one of the ways of expressing emotions and feelings, it should not consume the entire relationship. My idea is being worshipped and admired by handsome, smart, MATURE (please, do NOT read could-be-my-father mature) man. You know, that Prince Charming every girl dreams of. Well, as a logicaly thinking, intelligent human being i aknowledge the fact, that the entire idea of Prince Charming is just a myth, a magic story our mothers invented to get away from reality. Nevertheless, i want that magic story, even if it is just for awhile. I have no doubt, that there won't be "happily ever after" as there is no such thing as perfect person. Eventually, i'll go on marrying Mr. Right Now instead of Mr. Right. And it's fine, the key there is to make the best out of any situation, and i will. But before it happens i wish to be swept away, be completely and utterly in love, so one day i can tell my little girl a story about Prince Charming from my own experience.

There are so many negativity in that thread I would have stopped cold before replying to this psycho. She is narsistic indvidual who is bitter about her past relationship and hoping to live life in a fairy tail. She does not write anything postive as to what she can bring to the table and make the her partner feel good. Its all about me me me, she lives by her own rules and everybody be damned.

What you need to look for is a positive profiles with women who don't write so much b.s and are looking for reality not fantasy. Another thing, you need to create mystery when you type to meet those women. Don't type anything more then two sentences, remain mysterious and challanging while still maintaining your sense of humor and pride. Meet them as soon as you can face to face, the more you exchange emails the less likely you will see them.

 

[ogre]

trying a different approach

DJDamage:

I am now trying a different approach. In terms of getting answers back to my replies on CL ads, I've always had the best results if I make short sarcastic remarks. So I am going back to doing that. Yes I agree Ana is a totally selfish sugar baby who's looking for a little nookie before she settles in with her AFC husband. If I were that guy, I'd shoot her.


I composed a different reply to Ana under a different e-mail account and sent it this morning. text as follows:


so you're looking for James Dean to take you for a wild ride before you settle down and marry Mr. Sensible......
you've been reading too many romance novels. you need to get out more, girl.


also composed a 2nd reply to "can anyone get me?" under another alias: http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/can anyone.htm


text as follows:


Well let's see......
you seem like an interesting person, highly intelligent, but you are too full of yourself. My guess is you are a difficult person who tends to push people's buttons and gets into arguments. You are right you need someone to keep you grounded and you prolly could use a good spanking.
just my 2 cents worth.....
have a nice day


awaiting results on both. so far, nada. But I would appreciate any feedback from the board on these replies.

 

[ShortTimer]

Re: trying a different approach

Originally posted by ogre
Well let's see......
you seem like an interesting person, highly intelligent, but you are too full of yourself. My guess is you are a difficult person who tends to push people's buttons and gets into arguments. You are right you need someone to keep you grounded and you prolly could use a good spanking.
just my 2 cents worth.....
have a nice day


awaiting results on both. so far, nada. But I would appreciate any feedback from the board on these replies.

You know, pulling a girl's pigtails is fine... but there is a limit there. Don't come out swinging right away, MOST women won't respond well to it.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by ShortTimer
Oh I remember who you are talking about now. I just didn't realize his life went to ****. Wow that's too bad.

I won't say that it went to sh1t, he just seemed to loose control of it. It was as if someone else was controlling the direction of his life. It wasn't more that any person could handle, just a bit overwhelming.

 

[DJDamage]

Ogre:

Don't be too sarcastic, like in the real world you want your message to come across as being C&F and to intrigue them. Regardless how you portray yourself, a woman will not know how she feels about you without seeing your picture first. After she sees your picture and if you pass the physical test, then she will decide whether or not your message was interesting enough to reply or not. The hotter the woman the more likely she will pass greater judgment on your looks then your witty remarks due mainly to the large volume of traffic of men messaging her and therefore she has enough time to judge based on photo alone.

You are better off as some people said to invest in changing your look a bit. If this is you below ana then there are some ways to improve http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/ana.htm

First off get a color picture. Second off you come off as way too serious in the photo and that could scare some women. If you are serious about pursing women through the internet, you need to change your look a bit ( You sort of look like you can be a part of some Eastern European Organised Crime - The Scruffy 80's Al Pacino look got to go ). Trim or shave the facial hair completly, it will give you a more youthful look and less serious look. You might want to change the hair cut into something more modern to let the women know you took the picture recently ( This picture could have been taken in the 80's for all I know). A nice shirt will also tell her that you have taste and you like the finer things in life. It may sounds B.S but since you are not meeting her in the real world, she has to see the best quality picture because most women tend to be very judgemental when they look through photos.

 

[Jon E]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Regarding the online dating, I think you are corresponding with women who have many issues and hangups about men and if you don't fit the mold of your 'every day normal guy' your chances decreases even farther.

When you look at their profile which includes a picture and a brief summary, you need to pay close attension to red flags. Lets take a look at ana the woman you choose to correspond with: http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/ana.htm

Do you see a happy person in that picture? I sure don't, she looks way too serious and authoratative, why isn't she smiling? why isn't she happy? those questions you need to ask yourself: If she doesn't look happy by herself why would she be happy with me? Basically what I am saying that happy and positive people maintain happy and positive relationships.

Lets look at what she writes:


There are so many negativity in that thread I would have stopped cold before replying to this psycho. She is narsistic indvidual who is bitter about her past relationship and hoping to live life in a fairy tail. She does not write anything postive as to what she can bring to the table and make the her partner feel good. Its all about me me me, she lives by her own rules and everybody be damned.

Having experimented with online dating myself, Ive found that you really can't judge a person by their profile. Just because they're not smiling in one picture doesnt make them an all around unhappy person. Its just a picture. And just because they sound happy and outgoing in their description of themself doesnt make them a fun person to be around either.

You don't ever find out what they're really like until you meet them.

 

[DJDamage]

Having experimented with online dating myself, Ive found that you really can't judge a person by their profile. Just because they're not smiling in one picture doesnt make them an all around unhappy person. Its just a picture. And just because they sound happy and outgoing in their description of themself doesnt make them a fun person to be around either.

You don't ever find out what they're really like until you meet them.

I agree to everything you said Jon E. What I wanted to convey is that one should look out for red flags when dealing with online personals. If there are too many, why bother?! in the case of ana, I pointed out that there were too many and the fact that Ogre recieved such a negative repsonse from her, reinforced that belief.

That's why you do need to meet with them as soon as possible to get a feel for them as who they really are.

 

[Bonhomme]

In my limited experience

"Pulling on pigtails" got me a better response % than anything else during my brief attempts at online dating.

But my real strengths (how I carry myself, kino, eye contact, etc.) cannot very well be conveyed online, so I've left off the online thing.

 

[ogre]

yeah I def need new pics. that one is almost 10 years old. and yeah there is something disturbing about my "look". it's not a happy face. I'm better looking than that now. Happier. But I'm extremely camera shy.

anyway, I am corresponding RIGHT NOW with a new victim and trying to do the C+F thing but I'm a little clumsy at it. I'm not sure when to pull back the punches. view the dialog here:


http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/madness.htm

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by ogre
anyway, I am corresponding RIGHT NOW with a new victim and trying to do the C+F thing but I'm a little clumsy at it. I'm not sure when to pull back the punches. view the dialog here:


http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/madness.htm

WTF happened???!!! That was a good exchange Ogre. Not too many rough edges and you kept her laughing. It definitely seems as if you are building up her IL.

Now for the pic, since you are camera shy (I am too), try to get some action shots of you doing something. I use one with me in my swarthy garb at our local Renaissance Festival and another of me racing on my road bike. They usually spur some interesting conversations about my hobbies. You ride a motorcycle right? There must be something interesting you can take a picture of incorporating that.

 

[ogre]

WTF happened???!!! That was a good exchange Ogre. Not too many rough edges and you kept her laughing. It definitely seems as if you are building up her IL.

I dunno francisco. she just got pissed off. or maybe she's just done for the night. we'll just have to wait 'n' see...


I use one with me in my swarthy garb at our local Renaissance Festival and another of me racing on my road bike.

oh cool! I've just started learning 2-handed sword with the SCA. I'll bring my cam to next practice. And I'll get someone to take some pix of me with the bikes.

anyway, here is a reply I just sent off to another victim:
http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/never.htm

 

[Slickster]

by ogre

When I was 26 I met a nice pretty girl, we flirted for about a week and then I asked her out and she said yes and that was it. It was easy. no DJ skills, no inner game, no bull****, no drama. it just happened. We were together for a few months and we had lots of sex. never happened before and never happened since and no reason why.

This is key.

You WERE a DJ once! You just didn't know it. You say "It was easy. no DJ skills, no inner game, no drama, etc....". That IS the DJ way! It does just happen! And it happens because you don't care whether it does or not. You were there once and you can return.

You've built this problem in your own mind to epic proportions and your fears and insecurities are why you fail. You know this inside and you realize that you are actually battling yourself and losing! Instead of standing up to your demons you hide in fear and become more insecure. Its self defeating. Its sad.

You make reference to Yoda and Jedi mindtricks. Its not a special mind trick. It is a simple decision you make. Either "do or not do."

 

[Nex]

Originally posted by ogre

anyway, here is a reply I just sent off to another victim:
http://www.freewebs.com/ogrespage/never.htm

Oh my God, you are the man. I'm not saying that'll get you the girl, because the last to last line might've been pretty offensive, BUT THAT'S ONE OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS I'VE EVER READ! Kudos, that convo was hilarious!

[Note: Just now realized this is the Mature Men forum, my bad. Can't delete post.]