Interesting twist on my oneitis... Happened last night... Read!

[silverwex]

Thanks MDgood and santos for that. My afc mistake, which turned her off was this:

I asked her out one saturday night for the wednesday after and she said yes etc... We even planned what film we were gonna see. Wednesday came and she pulled out a few hours before. I stupidly got a little serious and a bit annoyed with her and said that usually if a girl did that to me itd be "Goodbye!" but id give her another chance. After that conversation everything went downhill. Weird how a small thing makes such a difference isnt it?!

 

[myfriendblu]

I agree with will on this one. your NOT over here yet and its still pretty obvious. You keep on and on anout how you "Know" your a DJ and you "Know" your over her. Well, as been quoted before, There is a difference between KNOWING the path and WALKING the path. Walk it. Its over with this chik and you know it. If her IL is that wishy-washy, there's no chance whatsoever. A chik that has high IL in you would never break up with you. NEVER. She should be TOTALLY into you, almost sorta clingy, but not too clingy. Shes not into you at all, in fact, she is screwing someone else. Let me mention that to you again. SHE IS SCREWING SOMEONE ELSE. Its over, let it be. Leave here AND HER FRIENDS alone. Time to move on

 

[rastlin2021]

A suggestion...

You could have dance with her for a while(indicating your interest) and then "switch" over and dance with her friend, at the same time taking note of her reaction. She will feel like she is not so attractive...when she is disappointed enough, give her some sweets by dancing with her again...think you will have a better response and attitude from her.

 

[silverwex]

myfriendblu: Yeah i admit it, Im not totally over her but i dont spend my days thinking about her non-stop either. Id say im 75% over her if ya wanna put a number on it. I know the DJ guidelines and im trying to put em into practice... Gimme time!

 

[Jay26]

Silverwex I think you'r still too into her, well i mean if you got time to write these posts so you definitely are! Looking for signs and this and that, it's too much analysis, when there's this much thought and effort put into it, it rarely works out, you just got let go, and see what happens, that's usually when it happens

 

[silverwex]

You're right jay. Im trying to let it go and i think im nearly there. Think ill re-read some bible posts tonight. thanks

 

[aguynamedwill]

I'm writing this more for myself as a reminder of how I'm beating my own one-itis. I developed this for a girl I was practicing on, when she did something that goes against DJ theory (went for office AFC, despite being into me).

Today I noticed how I act around women I'm not attracted to. I noticed that I pay them very little attention apart from the usual pleasantries ('Hi, name, how are you'). I sometimes won't even turn from what I"m doing to say hello to them. And I don't care if they respond, stick around or keep on going.

So I decided to consciously act this way towards my one-itis. Anything is better than obsessing over every little thing she's doing. So when she said hi I didn't even turn to face her, didn't use her name, didn't ask how she was. She passed my desk several times during the day. I successfully ignored her. I did however use what peripheral vision I have and saw her looking directly at me, like I was suppossed to be looking at her or something.

Now, the way I acted may be confusing to her. It may even be raising her interest level. But what's most important, is that I DON'T CARE. I DON'T CARE if she's becoming interested again. I DON'T CARE if things are going well with her and AFCguy. I HAVE BETTER THINGS TO SPEND MY THOUGHTS AND ENERGY ON. And I feel so much better. Like a burden off my shoulders. I can concentrate on other things even when she's nearby, like my job.

Take it or leave it, worked for me.

 

[Just-In]

Hi silverwex,

I've been through a similar situation like yours where the mind games wouldn't stop with this one girl. I am by no means a DJ yet but I felt that ignoring and playing most of these mind games were due to my insecurity. I was afraid that if I succumbed to her tests like you said, I might have returned the 'power' to her. The challenge was definitely there and it did work to a certain degree. That said, I believe my success was due to a balance between being a challenge and at the same time being an Alpha Male.

This has probably been said but i'll add on with what I think. Plainly ignoring her like that is gonna irritate her more than ever. To me, it shines insecurity as though you're afraid to face her. Be that alpha male you are and treat each and everyone the same. Be the center of attraction and let the best of your personality shine. When you achieve that, you'll find that in time you will meet much better women than her.

I wish you all the best man!